Chapter 5

MondayCampus felt loud in a weird way. Too many people walking too fast, laughing too hard. You pulled your hoodie tighter around yourself, earbuds in but no music playing. Just noise-cancelling the world.

Armin had texted you earlier. "Want me to wait for you after class?"You said no, but you didn't mean it in a cold way. You just needed a minute. Space to be in your own head. To figure out what the hell Monday you was supposed to do with the aftermath of weekend you.

You didn't regret it. Any of it. But now it was real. And it changed everything.

You spotted Sasha and Mikasa sitting on the low wall near the library entrance, finishing off some fries from the cafeteria. Sasha waved like she'd been waiting all day to see you.

"Damn, she lives," Sasha said through a mouthful of food. "I thought you ran off to join a cult or something."

You laughed, dropping your bag on the ground and flopping down beside them. 

"More like started one," Mikasa said, voice flat, but there was a glint in her eye. "Armin showed up at Jean's like a kicked puppy. Next thing we know, you're both gone and no one sees either of you all weekend."

You pulled your hood down and looked at them. "Okay, so maybe there was... something."

Sasha raised a brow. "Something? Girl, he looked like he was ready to beg you to forgive him in front of everyone. We had a whole bet going."

You looked at Mikasa. "What did you bet?"

"That you'd sleep with him but make him cry before breakfast."

You blinked. What the actual fuck? "Wait, seriously?"

"Yeah," Mikasa said. "Sasha said he'd cry during. I had more faith in your emotional restraint."

"Okay wow," you muttered, shaking your head but not even mad. "That's weirdly accurate and I hate it."

"So?" Sasha leaned closer. "What happened? And don't do that vague thing. We want the details. We earned them."

You hesitated. Thought about how much to say. How to explain something that didn't really have clear shape or labels yet.

"He stayed the night," you said finally. "We didn't... you know. Not like Friday. It wasn't like that. But... something did happen at Jean's that Friday, like I hope y'all didn't hear it tho. Hes eating it like a pro you know " You said it with no shame since you were friends for years, and you all were close like that.

" Fucking hell so that's what happened actually, I thought y'all had sex" Mikasa said looking at Sasha like they both thought the same.

"No, like i wanted to but it didn't happen" you added after a pause " he drove me home that night and stayed with me the whole weekend "

Mikasa's eyes softened. "So what was it like?"

You picked at a loose thread on your sleeve. "He held me. We talked. I almost cried tho. He almost did it too. It was... I don't know. Scary. But kind of good scary."

Sasha made a soft little sound, like she was trying not to aww too hard.

"He told me he wanted all of it," you added. "Even the broken parts."

"Holy shit," Sasha said. "That's like, peak romance novel shit. Did he also fight a dragon for you or-"

"His phone buzzed in the morning," you cut in. "Someone he used to hook up with."

Mikasa's face didn't change much, but her eyes sharpened. Sasha straightened a little too.

"He told me" You said quickly. "Said he hasn't talked to her in weeks. That it's done. Swore he'd tell her for real."

"And you believe him?" Mikasa asked, not judging, but having her guard up.

You nodded. "I think I do. At least enough to give him the chance to prove it."

"He's lucky," Mikasa said after a second. "Most guys don't get to fuck up that bad and still get a second chance."

"He knows," you said without thinking. "I think he knows what he almost lost."

Sasha tossed the empty bag of fries in the bin. "If he pulls that ghosting shit again, I swear to god, I'll key his bike or something."

"He doesn't even have a bike," you muttered.

"Then I'll buy him one just to destroy it."

You smiled. Not big, but real. The kind that felt earned, after all that suffering it was nice to laugh and have some fun with your friends, at least for a bit.

"I told him not to fuck it up," you said. "He said he wouldn't."

Mikasa nudged your arm with hers. "We've got your back. Either way."

"I know."

You sat there for a while, the three of you in that familiar quiet, where nothing needed to be said but everything still felt heard.

Your phone buzzed.

Armin: I told her. It's done. No more loose ends. Just you, if you'll still have me.

You stared at the screen for a second, heart beating just a little faster.

Then typed back: Okay. I'm still here.

You hit send.

" It's him?" Sasha asked looking a bit concerned.

"Yeah, he told me it's over with her... still I'm curious who is she, like how she looks like and shit like that you know"

" You really wanna destroy yourself, do you? That thing it's the most fucked up shit you can actually do. You will end up obsessed with her, wandering what does she have and you dont and... don't get me started with this please" Mikasa s words were sharp but also true, and you knew it.

"Yeah, I know... I won't do the FBI shit to investigate" and after you went silent, thinking again about Armin and you missed him. You wanted to be near him but you didn't know if it was a good idea now.

Sasha checked the time, groaning. "Shit, I gotta meet up with Connie, it's almost time and hes gonna yell at me if i don't go" 

Mikasa stood too. "You good?" she asked, and you could tell she meant it in more than one way.

You nodded, but not too hard. "I think so yeah"

"Don't let him make you smaller," she said, grabbing her bag. "You're allowed to want more."

"Yeah" you said softly. "Thanks."

They both left, and you were alone again. Not in a sad way. Just... still. That kind of pause that makes everything feel louder again.

You thought about going back to your dorm. Thought about pretending the day was done. But instead, your feet were already moving. You didn't text him. Didn't warn him. You just went there. You hoped you won't catch him with some bitch or something like that. The thought of it made your heart ache in the worst way.

When you reached Armin's building, you hesitated at the door. You weren't even sure if he was in. Or if showing up like this made you look too needy. Or stupid. Or worse, like you didn't mean it when you said you needed space.

But then the door opened. Like some fucking movie timing. He looked surprised. But only for a second.

"Hey" he said, quiet.

"Hey" you answered, suddenly not knowing what the fuck you were doing anymore.

"I didn't think you'd come."

"I wasn't going to," you admitted. "But then I did."

"Yeah?" he asked. There was this tiny flicker of hope on his face and you hated how it made your chest hurt.

You nodded. "Can I come in?"

He stepped aside. "Always."

The place smelled like laundry detergent and whatever cologne he always wore that somehow smelled expensive on him.

You sat on his bed, crossed your legs, tried to look casual. He sat too, not too close. Respectful distance. Waiting.

"I got your text" you said after a second.

"I meant it," he replied immediately. "I told her everything. That it's done. That there's someone else."

"Did she take it okay?"

He looked at the floor. "She didn't say much. Just left me on read. I just know she didn't care"

You stared at your hands. "That's fair."

"Yeah."

Silence. You glanced over at him. He looked tired. Like he hadn't slept, maybe he hadn't. You hadn't either, really.

"Why'd you come?" he asked, finally.

You shrugged. "Because I missed you. Even for a second. Even with all the noise in my head."

He reached out, slow like always, and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear.

"I'm scared" you whispered.

"So am I" he said.

You didn't say anything after that. Just sat there, both of you looking like you were still catching up to what being in the same room meant again.

Armin stood up, then crossed the room and opened his mini fridge.

"You want anything? I've got like, expired soda and maybe edible yogurt."

You laughed." wow so romantic."

He held up a can. "Cherry Coke or nothing."

You took it, cracked it open, and sipped. It was, in fact, flat as hell. But cold and you didn't mind.

He grabbed the remote and flipped the TV on, lowering the volume to barely audible. Some dumb movie already halfway through. Neither of you really watched it.

You leaned back against the headboard, pulling your knees up to your chest. He sat beside you, closer now. Eventually, his arm brushed yours. Then stayed there.

After a long stretch of not-talking, he spoke. Quiet, like he wasn't even sure he wanted to hear himself say it.

"You know, back in high school" he started, "when we had that fight and we didn't talk much... I used to watch you"

You turned to look at him.

"Not in a creepy way," he added quickly, face flushing. "I mean, probably a little creepy, yeah, but I didn't know how else to be near you. You were always... I don't know. Like you belonged somewhere bigger than that place"

You blinked, thrown by it. "I didn't even know you noticed me in that way back then."

"Yeah. I figured. You had your headphones on. Always smoking or writing or just staring at the wall like it owed you money."

You laughed. Couldn't help it. "Wow. So I've always been dramatic."

"Not dramatic," he said. "Just... real. It was like you already lived in the future. And I was still stuck trying to figure out the present."

You set your drink down and leaned into him, head on his shoulder. He didn't move, just shifted a little so you fit better.

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" you asked.

"I thought I'd mess it up," he said. "I wasn't ready."

"And now? Are you now?"

He paused. You could feel his breath when he spoke.

"I don't know if I'm ready now, either. But I don't want to miss it again."

You shifted a little, shoulder digging into his side in that not quite comfortable way. But you didn't move away. You just let your hand fall casual, fucking intentional against his leg. Your heart started to race. Was it too soon? Was this ok? You didn't know, maybe it was wrong, maybe it was too soon but honestly? you didn't care.

Armin glanced at you. You turned your head, resting your chin lightly on his shoulder. "Is this okay?" you asked softly.

He nodded. "Yeah. It's more than okay."

He looked nervous, but not in the bad way. In the way that said he cared too much and didn't want to ruin it by breathing wrong.

You slid your fingers up his thigh, slow. Testing. The tension in him hit instantly, but he didn't pull away. His voice cracked a little when he said, "You sure?"

You kissed his jaw. "Yeah..."

That's when his hand came up, cupped the side of your face like you were made out of glass and he wasn't sure if he was allowed to hold you yet. You leaned into it. Let him touch and do whatever he wanted.

Then your mouths met soft, at first. No rush, Just the kind of kiss that burned under your skin for minutes after it ended. Except it didn't end. (HELL YEAH)

It deepened, slow and warm, and your body moved without asking. You climbed into his lap like you belonged there. Like maybe you always had. You took off his glasses, placing them on the nightstand near his bed and his hands found your waist, hesitating like he didn't want to push. But you pushed for both of you, grabbing his face, tilting it just right, kissing him like he was something you were finally allowed to want without guilt crawling up your spine.

(18+ skip/wait until the next chapter if you're not comfortable w reading it)

 (FUCKING HELL YEAH BRO)

You could feel him getting hard underneath you, and you didn't stop. You rocked once, slow, and his breath stuttered against your mouth.

"Shit" he whispered, hands gripping tighter. "You're driving me insane."

You smirked. "Good."

But it wasn't just about that. It wasn't about power or teasing. It was about needing him close. About making it real. About forgetting everything else, at least for today.

He kissed down your neck just barely, enough to make you moan. You threaded your fingers in his blonde hair and tugged soft

His mouth went still for a second. "We don't have to if you don't want-"

"I want to," you said, fast. "I just... don't want it to be like last time."

He looked at you, really looked. "It won't be."

He leaned to capture your lips in a hot, wet kiss, pouring all of his need into the heated embrace. At the same time, his hands slid under your hoodie his thumbs brushing over your nipples and it made you shiver and moan into his mouth. You felt yourself getting wet and you let your hips roll against his again, and he groaned, quiet, low in his throat, like he was trying not to lose it too fast.

"Fuck, I can't hold back anymore" he breathed. "You're gonna kill me."

"Please don't hold back..." you said against his mouth, grinning a little, breath hitching as his hands moved higher, palms warm and careful against your back.

You tugged the hoodie off without thinking, hair a mess and wild now, but you didn't care. His eyes were on you like you were something holy. Not perfect, but wanted. Like he wanted to devour you.

His shirt came off next, clumsy and fast, and you couldn't help but laugh when it got stuck on his elbow. He laughed too, breathless, cheeks flushed.

He leaned down to touch your chest, then his lips found your nipple and you moaned, arching your body more into his mouth. He licked and sucked your nipples then left a small red mark on your collarbone. Marking you again, and making you his this time.

"Please..." you begged. You needed him inside you, to feel all of him and it was driving you crazy how much you needed him.

You kissed down his neck, biting just enough to make him hiss. His hands were everywhere now, your waist, your thighs, your face. Like he didn't know what to touch first.

Then you were on your back, and he was over you, kissing you like the world was ending. His weight felt good and you could feel that he was fully hard now. It made you fucking soaked.

You tugged him closer. "I missed you."

"I was right here," he whispered.

"No, not like that. I missed you before I even had you."

He looked at you like that meant something. Maybe it did.

His hand slid down, hooked your shorts with his fingers. Paused. "Can I?"

You nodded. "Yeah." And he took your shorts off along with your lace panties and he touched you. The moment he felt how wet you were he moaned, then he looked at you.

" If you want to stop, at any time you can just say it" His fingers were on your entrance, teasing your clit with slow strokes.

" No... Please, Armin" you begged again feeling like you can't take it anymore. And without needing any more consent he inserts one finger and then a second, knuckle deep inside. You arched your back letting out a guttural moan. He moved his fingers slow at first, then did that thing again, curling them up as he finger fucked you faster and faster. It didn't take long, a few more thrusts and you came, loud and messy and immediately he silenced you with his mouth

" Shhh, I've got you" he said still moving his fingers, not as fast and hard as before, as you came down from the heights of pleasure.

You remained still for a moment after the orgasm, catching your breath and then you opened your eyes. You saw him, his blue eyes were darkened with desire. Armin removed his fingers slowly, then he took off his sweatpants and boxers and holy shit he was pretty big.  (SCREAMING GUYS)

Then he reached to the drawer and took a condom " You know... these aren't mine. Eren has like 5 packs"

You couldn't help but laugh and he did too, then he was serious again. His hand cupped your face, touching your cheek slightly. " You're pretty... you always were". Armin put the condom on and pressed a kiss on your forehead, and at the same time opened your legs to position himself.

And it hit you. You didn't do it in like 6 or 7 months and you remember that the last time you did it after such a long time it hurt like shit, almost made you cry.

"Just be careful" You whispered looking at him and he smiled like he knew what you meant with it.

"Don't worry, I will go as slow as you need" 

The air shifted. Everything slowed for a second, quiet but buzzing. You were aware of everything-his breath, your heartbeat, the way his touch made your whole body pull tight and ache in the best way.

He pushed inside, slow until he was all in and he moaned, closing his eyes " Fuck"

"How is it?" Armin asked not moving, just waiting for you to get used to it. He leaned down pressing a short kiss on your lips " You ok?"

It hurt, your body because you were having sex after months, and your heart too. You didn't know he could be so gentle, that he could put you first and not just pound into you like a freak and somehow this made your heart ache a bit.

" Yeah, I'm fine" You answered after a while and he smiled down at you. He still didn't move, he waited a few more seconds and when he did he started slow and he kept the same pace for a while, probably making sure hes not hurting you. 

" God It feels good" he breathed and buried his face in your neck, picking up the pace, thrusting faster and faster and you could just moan. You wrapped your arms around his neck to keep him close and he pressed his forehead on yours.

" Fuck Armin..." you whispered and closed your eyes. It felt good, way better than expected because it was him, and because you loved him.

He took his time, like he didn't want to rush it, like every inch of you mattered. He wasn't rough, yeah he still fucked you hard and fast but not rough. He made you feel wanted. Safe. Like maybe all the broken parts weren't deal-breakers, just... things someone could hold gently.

He reached down and rubbed your clit, as he kept the same rhythm. His eyes were on you the whole time, watching your every expression. You were biting your bottom lip, trying to be more quiet but you just couldn't. Not when it felt so fucking good, better than any drug you've tried. 

"I'm coming" you breathed, and he moved just a bit faster.

" Let it happen... fuck please cum" and you did. You spasmed and arched your body under him, moaning his name softly as he chased his own orgasm now, and after a while, with a low guttural moan he finished, and you could swear that you heard him how he whispered your name just before he came. But maybe you were crazy, and he actually didn't say it.

He remained inside you a few more minutes, holding you tight and close to his chest.

" Are you ok?" Armin asked after he pulled out and took the condom off. He took you in his arms again.

" I'm fine" For the first time in fucking forever you felt ok, more than ok actually. 

"I didn't know it could feel like that" you murmured.

"Me neither," he said. "With anyone else... it never did." Maybe because he just fucked without having any feelings involved, just sex and that's all. But this felt more than that.

You wanted to say more, something soft and stupid like I think I love you. But you didn't. Not yet.

Instead, you just tangled your fingers with his and let your head rest on his chest. 

It finally happened and it was no turning back from it.

OMFG GUYS IDK HOW TO WRITE SMUT WITH A LOT OF DETAILS SO I JUST KEPT IT MORE SIMPLE. Hope y'all liked it. Don't forget to vote and let me know ur thoughts ab it in the comments. See y'all in the next chapter.

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