Chapter 87

Katniss

The next morning, I decide to leave Peeta to sleep. He is usually awake during the night. He has both of our nightmares to deal with. I've tried getting him to wake me whenever the dreams haunt him, but he never does and I never notice when it's happening. He doesn't yell or move around, like I do. Sometimes I feel guilty but I push the feeling back. It's the Capitol's fault, not mine.

I silently slip into the kitchen and place a piece of bread, two apples, and a canteen of water in my game bag. When I'm finished I write Peeta a quick note and pray he won't worry about me while I'm out. I decide to bring some money over to Massie, as thanks for taking care of my leg. I hardly notice now when I walk. Dealing with stairs is the only problem, but I hardly go upstairs anymore anyway.

I slip my ash gray colored jacket and my hunting boots. I decide to wear a thick white scarf because it gets cold in the woods, especially now that Winter's coming. The leaves have already begun to fall off the trees in the woods, so I decide that I need to get out now before it gets too cold. Before the Games, the Winters were so hard in the Seam. So many deaths. My mother had too many patients to count. We didn't have much to keep warm in, so I didn't get to go out into the woods as often. Usually I stayed by the small fireplace, wrapped up with Prim in the thickest blanket we could find. I tried to ignore the cries coming from the kitchen where my mother worked. Sometimes Prim had to go help, so I was left alone. I didn't get as much game either. Whatever Gale and I managed to kill, we shared equally, though, even if it was just a squirrel.

My boots crunch on the frozen grass beneath my feet. I keep my head down, my hands in my coat pockets. I regret not grabbing a pair if gloves also.

When I arrive at her house, Massie takes the money, never ceasing to say thank you. I nod, telling her I have plenty more for Peeta and I.

I pause at Hazel's old house. It's a small house, with only two bedrooms. The peeling walls used to be painted yellow but are now a white covered in grime and dirt. The door is the same way. It isn't much of a door really. It's a piece of dull colored wood in front of a movable screen. I think about walking up the stones and knocking on the door, but I can't decide if that would be smart or not. Gale might still be here and I don't want to see him now.

But before I walk away to the woods, Hazel calls my name. I have to split second to pretend like I didn't hear her and walk away anyways. I know my chance is over though, when she opens the door and says my name again. I wave half-heartedly and shift my weight to my good leg. "Would you like to come in Katniss?" she says. I open my mouth to say no thank you but for some undecided reason I nod my head. Hazel smiles and motions for me to follow her.

Usually I don't see much of Hazel. She stopped cleaning Haymitch's house a long time ago, and it has now turned back into its disgusting mess. She moved with her three other kids to District 2 with Gale, but returned a few years later. Posy and Rory still live here, but Vick lives somewhere else in 12.

My stomach drops when I hear the soft giggle of a baby. I pause halfway through the door, debating on whether or not to turn around and run. "I'm sure Gale will love to see you."

"He's here?" I ask, even though I already know the answer. Hazel nods with a smile that disappears quickly. "Why? Do you not feel comfortable? You didn't have to come in, I just thought-"

"No, no. It's fine." I put on a fake smile and follow Hazel to the kitchen.

***

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