Chapter 012

From the makeshift camp that Daryl had made to separate himself from everyone else, I could see Andrea seated atop Dale's RV. She supported a rifle on her side as she scanned the surrounding areas for any type of threat. A few feet to the right of the RV was the base camp, where the rest of the group had gathered their belongings and set up their tents. The fire in the center had long been smothered, no longer dancing with the slight wind.

A fishing line was hung between the trees that shields the camp from the moon, supporting damp clothes and drying dishes. A good distance to the left of the RV was the barn that once housed walkers, next to the barn was the shed. Shane Walsh stood outside its doors, pacing back and forth as he guarded it from Randall. Although the teenager has been knocked out cold for hours and can't walk, Shane was determined to kill the kid.

The farm house stood tall in the middle of it all, untouched and unbothered by the world that surrounds it. The lights had been off for a few hours now, yet I could see the occasional movements in Maggie Greene's room as there was a dim flashlight seen from the window. Glenn had walked into the house a few moments ago, sneaking away from the camp and Andrea's gaze. So I have no doubt they're up to adult-like games.

Daryl and I sit just outside of our tent, a small fire going to keep us warm against the upcoming falls breeze. Neither of us uttered a word, our eyes cast against the dancing flames. Occasionally I'd glance over at him to see that his brows were knitted together as he bit at the dead skin surrounding his left thumb nail. Whatever he was thinking about put fear deep within his blue eyes and I wanted to ensure him that everything would be fine, but would it really be fine?

In a sense, we were stranded with a group of survivors, alone trying to fight off what the world had created. Nobody knew if they'd wake up to see the sunrise and if they did, they didn't know if they'd make it to see the sunset. Nothing was certain in this world anymore, most definitely not our lives. So how am I suppose to assure someone else that everything will be fine, that our baby will beat this world when we don't even know if we will?

Even if everything does turn out fine, how do I ensure that I won't become my father?

Glancing over at Daryl as he shifts uncomfortably in the foldable chair, his eyes never left the flames. I carefully rest my hand on his leg, easing the bouncing that started a few moments ago. His eyes instantly flick toward my hand before he stops chewing at the dead skin around his nails, carefully intertwining our hands together. "What.... what made you test?" Daryl was the first to break the silence as he finally turned to look at me, uttering a single question.

"I was late," I sign tiredly as I look back toward the fire, watching as the red, orange and yellow merge together. With the breeze, it almost looks as if they were dancing the night away. "At first, I thought it was just stress and the injury I had from the fall," Looking back toward the man, I watch as he studies my fingers as I signed each word. His eyes seemed to darken at the mere memory of what had happened before this very moment; me falling, almost getting killed by walkers, being gone. "It wasn't until I started throwing up at the sight of blood, getting nauseous at skinning animals. We both know that just isn't me."

We fell into silence rather easily as he took in my words, beginning to fiddle with his own fingers. It was another one of his nervous tics, something that he had picked up from Louise so long ago. Looking away from the man, I stare down at my own fingers as I begin to think of everything. I didn't even know what we were yet we are going to end up raising a baby together.

Daryl and I never got the chance to sit down and discuss what had happened that night at the CDC. The place blew up and a chain of just bad luck was thrown our way before we could even act on whatever that was. I know that deep down I love Daryl more than just my best friend, he was someone I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, however long that will be. But did he even feel the same? Was that just a one night stand to him, no feelings attached?

Regardless on if there were no feelings attached on his end, something came from that one night. Here I sat, pregnant and worried about a child I never met before while being forced to care for another child that isn't even mine. I know that Lori is pregnant, everyone knew who the father is too; but even know I still like it is selfish to bring a child isn't this world. But maybe she was in my boat, unable to actually terminate the pregnancy will a single pill.

Maybe she was too scared to, feeling rather attached to the baby that is growing inside of her; whether it was Shane's or her husband's. Because regardless, that baby is still apart of her, apart of Carl. Just like the baby growing inside of me is apart of me, something I never wanted but seem to want at this moment. Because at least on my end, this baby was made out of love, even if Daryl doesn't view me as a life partner; we still love each other as best friends.

"What's going on in that mind of yours?" Daryl asks after he rubbed my leg to get my attention once more, which caused me to look over at him and relax my own eyebrows. Having relaxed at his touch, I could feel my anxiety picking up at the very question. Do I speak the truth or do I keep it within my own mind? Looking away from him for just a moment, I heave a sigh.

"What are we?" I question after a moment before I looked back toward my best friend. For a second, he looks confused before it seems to connect that we never spoke about what happened. We never spoke about if we felt a certain way toward one another or not. "What we did at the CDC, the kiss earlier, the baby.... what does that make us?"

"Come here," Daryl says softly as he motions for me to sit on his lap. Doing as I am told, I stand up and carefully maneuver myself to sit on his lap comfortably, bypassing the sheath and knife easily. "I'm not good at this stuff, you know that. You saw my other relationships, you've seen it all," He wraps his arms around me gently as he places a hand on my flat belly. He looks down at where his hand is, the fear appearing in his eyes once more. "I'd understand if you wanted to just be friends, co-parent or whatever. But I do love you. I always have."

"I love you too, Daryl."

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Catching the scent of bacon being cooked, I am instantly greeted with a round of nausea. Pushing past the covers on the sleeping bag, I force myself up and I run out of the tent. Clamping my hand over my mouth in hopes to stop myself from throwing up, I fail the second I reach the tree line. Gagging as I bend over, I watch as dinner from the night before falls to the ground.

Wiping the sides of my mouth with the sleeve of my shirt, I sit down in the grass as I lean against a tree. A groan left my parted lips as I catch the smell of bacon once more, the smell instantly causing a tightness in my stomach. Resting my head against the tree, I close my eyes as I begin to count to five, hoping that the nausea will ease up. One, two, three, four.... five.

Reopening my eyes, I look up to see Daryl standing in front of me. His eyes fill up with concern as he noticed the pile of vomit next to me. Watching as the man kneels down in front of me, he gently places a hand on my shoulder as another cups my face. He carefully pulls me in, allowing me to snuggle up to him as we both sit on the sound. Curling up into his lap, I carefully breathe in his musky scent.

Woods and cigarettes, a better combination than whoever decided to cook bacon this god-awful morning. Feeling his callused hands rubbing circles on my lower back, I allow myself to let out a sigh. "Whoever invented bacon needs to be shot." I signed, as I pull myself away from Daryl. Looking over toward the man, I notice a chuckle leave his lips as he shakes his head.

"That's one of your favorite foods, Kat."

"Not anymore."

Once I assured myself that I wasn't going to throw up anymore, I had walked to my tent and changed my clothes. Late last night I had gone through and burned my old clothes that were torn and stained before replacing them with what Maggie had given me. Which were a few pair of jeans, a tank top and a tight fitting maroon colored T-shirt. Since the days were starting to grow cool, I layered the black tank top with the T-shirt before putting on the skinny jeans before finishing off with my boots that were starting to fall apart.

Duct tape held them together for the most part, but I didn't have the luxury to find another pair just yet. And with my recent diagnosis, I doubt Daryl will even let me leave this farm without a fuss. Even if it meant everyone else finding out, which is what we both don't want happening until I can't hide it anymore. Exiting the tent, I notice that Daryl had left our small camp, causing me to walk toward the farmhouse.

Maggie and Beth sat on the porch, their hands wrapped around their mugs as they talked to one another. Patrica stood just outside of the chicken coup, tossing seeds over the fence with ease. Lori, Carl and Sophia sat at a table as Lori had them doing schoolwork, something I still didn't see the point in now that the world ended. Rick and Shane stood by the shed that held Randall, the two seemingly having an important conversation, no doubt about the kid.

Andrea is sitting on top of the RV with a rifle in hand, as Dale stood next to it as he cooked over the fire; bacon. Forcing myself to look away from the source of my nausea, I scrunch up my face before I walk closer toward the house. I need to get something into my stomach but bacon isn't going to be one of the things I eat. Walking up the steps of the farmhouse, I bid a hello to the Greene sisters and walk inside.

Making my way through the home, I enter the kitchen where I see Hershel. He sat at the island with his Bible in hand, drinking what I assume is coffee. Nodding in his direction, I grab an apple off of the counter and begin to eat it. "You doing okay this morning?" Hershel questions as he eyes the Apple, an eyebrow raised as he then looks at me.

"Yeah, just didn't feel like bacon as my first breakfast back." I lie before taking another bite of the apple. Hershel only nods before returning back to his Bible. Finishing off the Apple, I toss the core into the trash bin before making my way into the living area where I spot a small bookshelf. Scanning the books, I spot How to Kill a Mockingbird.

Picking up the book, I sit down on the floral pattern couch and begin to read. Before I could get far into the book, I felt a dip next to me causing me to look up. Tilting my head, I glance next to me to see Maggie. "That's a good book," The brunette states after a moment of silence on her end, as she pulls her knees to her chest in an attempt to get comfortable. "My stepmom use to read that to Beth as a bedtime story."

"What a bedtime story for a child." I sign as I close the book and sit it down next to me. I've read the book over a hundred times, so I knew how it ended and how it went - but it was still a good book. It was a classic, one I loved to read when things became too much around me. "I don't know much sign language. Just the basics from college," Maggie admits, clearly not understanding what I had said. "Beth was the one that excelled in learning though. She loved learning new ways to talk to people,"

"Anyway, I had Glenn get you this while he went on a run this morning. I figured it'd help."

Looking down at Maggie's hand, I notice a decently sized notepad with a pen stuck in it. Smiling toward the farmer's daughter, I carefully grab the notepad and flip to the first unused page. Clicking the pen, I carefully begin to write down what I wanted to say. Turning the notepad for Maggie to read, I watch as she studies the words.

I can teach you some more ASL if you want me to. Beth could join us once she feels up to it.

I remember why Rick and Glenn had gone to the small town. They needed to get Hershel back to the farm to care for his teenage daughter who seemed to be in some sort of shock. She has since gotten out of the cationic state but has yet to leave her bed to properly care for herself. Lori and Maggie have been taking turns with sitting with Beth, bringing her food and drinks as well.

"We'd like that."

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Welcome back! Sorry that it took so long to get back with another chapter. Life has been hectic since January of last year when I had my son. And now that he's moving around and being a typical one year old, I can barely find time to sit and write. But I am trying the best I can given the time I have.

Anyway, this is another filler-type chapter and probably boring as it is small talk. However the next chapter jumps a week into Katherine and Sophia being at the farm. Then from there, we will be back into the episodes.

I hope you guys enjoy!

Lots of Love, Crimson Rose