Chapter 31

Today's the interview and Elizabeth's team had been running around and getting their shit together because we are going to the studio in an hour and a half and they've just started working on her make up. Its a bit strange dressing up for a live interview since I haven't done that before. Its always been a zoom interview or maybe a podcast for my friends or maybe a YouTube video, but this is a first and I'm really more excited than nervous but in a good way. I just can't wait for us to get official "again".

Currently, I'm sat by her couch in the master's bedroom wearing a beige colored suit as I rewatch our interview with Jimmy Fallon, the first time we made it official, while she and her team are currently busy getting ready. Well, I'm starting to believe Elizabeth when she said I wasn't good with interviews and I get kind of jittery and kept moving around in my seat with my bouncing leg that never stops only when she places her arms over it, and I wonder, what the fuck is going on inside of her head.

I know it might be scary being taped for an interview in a television show, but the woman I'm seeing here on the screen should have settled down now that her lady is beside her all throughout the interview. Anyway, maybe the accident did a little better on me, I guess. I just hope this time, that era won't be brought up because I'm really not that comfortable talking about it since I still don't have a fucking clue what actually happened.

'Okay, to answer that, I want you all to meet, no that's stupid, you all know her. So this is, my beautiful girlfriend Elizabeth and yea.'

I smiled at the screen. I haven't found this video from my channel and maybe it was deleted or I was the one who deleted it, I don't know. I don't have any memory of me, my mom and my girlfriend having a Q&A at a park. Wait, is this our spot? Well the huge tree and the lamp post are very identical so maybe it is.

The interview comes to an end and while I sat back on the couch thinking what might happen later on in the interview with James Corden. Questions that he would probably ask like maybe Elizabeth's upcoming movie with the Benedict Cumberbatch. I know, and I can't wait for it and hopefully I might be doing the photoshoot for them. Then there's Wandavision which is still ringing in the media, that show is just mmm, mmm, mmm *chef's kiss* straight to perfection and then there's us. I'm sure they would ask what happened and I might pullout the Dallas card later on so I better come prepared.

I scrolled down for the recommended videos and something caught my eye. 'A Surprise Visit from Someone Got Elizabeth Olsen Blushing' with a thumbnail of her smiling so sweetly her cheeks are painted pink. I raised my brows as I looked at the date it was uploaded. 2 years ago. 2019. I clicked on it with my stomach churning at the excitement of having to watch it.

'So you live together now?'

'Yes, we live together. It already happen a couple of months ago, I guess. I just sold my house and we moved some of my stuff back at my mom's house and some to her house-'

'Hey Shannon' Anthony butts in looking at the cameras 'If you're watching this. I salute you for making Lizzie Olsen sell her house and move in with you. Damn'

'What's the fuss all about?'

The moment I appeared on the screens sunk down to my seat and slowly looks up, I let out a breath of disbelief. Whoa, that's not me. I look concerningly thin, like cheeks sunken down a bit giving a highlight of my sharp features on the face which the cheekbones and my jawline, a pullover that's looking like an oversized one for me with a loose skinny jeans and a ball cap. I suddenly had a weird feeling watching me talk as the interview goes. It doesn't register what we were talking about because my eyes were stuck at my body, that body. What in tarnation did happened to me?

"Shan, honey?" I look up at the sound of her addressing to me and saw her looking at me through her huge vanity mirror with a concern looking face and continues "Are you okay?"

I must've pulled a face earlier for her to ask me that question, so I try to relax and give her a half hearted smile and nod. She's pretty unconvinced as she stares at me still but nods and turns back to the mirror. I went back to the video. Now I ask myself, is this the time when I was having a hard time. I mean, after we broke up for two weeks I think, that's what she told me. The kissing Robbie at a party era? Maybe, because there's no way I would be in a happy relationship with my girlfriend with nothing going on whatsoever and still look like that.

The video finishes and I'm still lost in thought. Elizabeth might've mentioned that I was in a terrible state but I wasn't expecting that. Was it that bad? Yes I had flashbacks of the kiss but the aftermath of it, I still haven't figured that out yet. I turned off my phone, realizing I'm too occupied to even watch another one and also not to escalate this strange feeling inside of me that I couldn't quite explain. kind of like a frustration of some kind and its starting to affect my mood for the day.

"Shan?" I hear Elizabeth calls snapping me to reality and look up to her. She stands there with her crew looking at me too. Her make up is done and she looks absolutely stunning if that's even possible and so I smiled and raised my brows standing up and walk towards her as she says "I'm just going to get dress okay, are you sure you're alright?"

"I am now." I smiled "You are absolutely stunning my love. Do you know that?" She smiles as I hear sniggers from her crew but I didn't care. She was all I can set my eyes on. She sighs and lets me kiss her on her temple as she touches my blazer gripping on it from the side.

"Now, go get dressed." She gives me a nod and a small smile but still kept her eyes on me, reading me in some way. I stepped back squeezing her hand and let her crew take her to her walked in closet, which also has a dressing room in it, leaving me alone in the bedroom. I sighed and sat back to the couch. I try to distract myself by looking up to some of my film photos that I can use for this sun printing idea that I saw on TikTok and I figured why not try it and if its successful and I love it maybe try to make some merch again as well.

It worked and after a while, I already have all of my materials checked out from Amazon and it might take a week till it arrives to my house and that's cool. I then look up as I hear voices starting to get audible and see her team starting to come out of the door before revealing her. She smiles wearing a gray suit that is slightly big for for her but I think that's just the fit really goes and either way she still takes my breath away.

"Well, you really mean business darling. You're absolutely stunning." She giggles as she walks towards me while I stood up opening my arms for her to fall in.

"You're not bad yourself honey." She smiles so sweetly in my arms looking up to me. I winked and she rolls her eyes making me chuckle. Suddenly a knock on the door made us turn and see Marla walking in, she sighs in somewhat 'not again' way and it made me wonder why we don't get along that well.

"We should go, we're going to be late if we don't start moving." She raises her brows at the both of us and subconsciously, I nod my head and with that she was gone followed by the rest of the team.

"Marla hates me doesn't she?" Elizabeth chuckles taking my hand in hers lacing it together while the other takes a hold of my arm.

"No she doesn't. She's just like that okay." I doubt it, she couldn't even give me a fucking smile. I hummed in response before grabbing her purse and made our way out of the room following her team. They started packing up while Elizabeth and I check if we got everything we needed. After a while Jake arrives by the parking lot with the team so as a routine, I went for the usual huddle while Elizabeth and Marla had their talk as well.

"Are you going home tonight?" Elizabeth says as soon as we settled down in the van. I'm not so sure how to answer that. Well, I haven't been home in like a week or so and Zoë is still at Liz's. I looked at her to see her hopeful eyes staring back at me. She wants me to stay.

"I need to check things at home sweetheart so I was hoping I would get home tonight. Zoë is still at her girlfriend's. " It suddenly feels so different saying that, because when I think of home, I think of her. She sighs sadly but gave me a smile before saying 'Alright then' in an obvious sad tone so I placed a soft kiss on her temple.

"I'll come by your house tomorrow after my Zoom Interview with Storyblocks okay and maybe Zoë will be home by then. My babies need caring my love." I say and this made her snap her head to me with an utterly confused look on her face. I smiled at her reaction.

"Babies?"

"Yea, my plants" She laughs and I got confused as to why that is actually funny. But her laugh is contagious it was making me smile. I love it when she laughs.

"Why, why are you laughing?" I asked and she settles down and looks at me with one brow raised.

"Are you actually being serious?" I nod in response. She leans back and looks at me intently straight into my eyes.

"You have plants? Baby you couldn't even take care of your plants back at your old house before. They kept on getting blisters because of you overwatering them so I had to take over." She giggles and that somehow made me feel some kind of comfort in some sort of way, I can't explain it. Its warm and fuzzy feeling whenever she would bring up a happy core memory that had completely disappeared from my mind.

"Really?"

"Yup, you insisted that you don't have the green thumb and that your okay with me taking care of them." She smiles lacing our fingers together. Then I remembered we had a greenhouse. It was on the interview earlier and I think she mentioned this to me already, I can't quite remember it still.

"But we had a greenhouse right?" She nods and rests her chin on my shoulder looking at me in a cute and adorable way.

"We did but we didn't get to finish it because of-" She pauses and I immediately got on. "that" I nod in response placing a soft kiss on her forehead for some kind of reassurance. Even though Elizabeth and I are back together. I can still feel her walls around her. The panic attacks, her anxiety, every time her mood changes whenever we get to that part when we broke up two years ago and how we were back then, it creates a huge wall around her that I have to break in.

"But I have plants my love and they need nurturing."

"Alright then, if you say so." She giggles again before giving me a kiss. I wonder how the interview would go.———————"Okay, 5 minutes and you're on." A crew says as we walk towards the closed curtain that had an 'X' spot on the floor and I think that's where we'll be coming out. Elizabeth's been jittery the moment we stepped in to her dressing room. She doesn't tell me why because every time I'd ask her, I would always get a smile and a nod and an unconvincing 'I'm fine honey. No need to worry about' . But still, I doubt it because she refuse to let go of my hand or lose sight of me and I can sense something more that's about to happen.

Marla and Alyssa have spoken to the writers and producers a while ago so I'm really hoping that this interview goes smoothly. The crew goes up to us and ask us to keep our distance since we are still observing safety precautions and that didn't sit well with Elizabeth because I have to let go of her hand.

"Its okay sweetheart, I'm right behind you 3 feet away." I say giving her a kiss on top of her head before finally letting go. She sighs a heavy breath as she looks back at me and still I can sense the worry so I smiled, a proper smile that reassures her scrunching my nose just to lighten up the mood a bit. I need her to calm down.

Let's welcome our first guests tonight. She's the incredibly talented you know from the Avengers movies, Wind River, Ingrid goes West and so much more plus finally, I'm so glad we finally got her on the show, the director of Sorry For Your Loss and YouTuber star. We love them both in our show, let's welcome Elizabeth Olsen and Shannon Beveridge.

That's our cue, I saw Elizabeth's shoulders rises and falls in a heavy manner as the curtains parts to the side allowing light to blind me once again. I followed her as she steps on stage waving to the audience and I smile just looking at her so adorable before finally breathing out and wave to the roaring crowd feeling some kind of familiarity. Well, I've done this before but just can't remember every single detail of it. Elizabeth glances at me and I just smiled at her before she sits down on one of the single couches from across the table still waving at the crowd giggling. I did the same thing as well, sitting on the other single couch a bit far from hers. Woah, why am I getting nervous all of the sudden. I've done this before, right?

"Thank you Elizabeth and Shannon for being here. Oh God, the crowd loves you." James says and Elizabeth and I exchange looks before looking at the crowd that are still going with their applause and a series of cheers. Its overwhelming, in a good way that is "Elizabeth this is your first in studio appearance in over a year, how are you feeling?"

"I'm so glad to be here and not talking to you through a screen. That was kind of awkward really, but its great to be here." I smiled just looking at her, my heart bursting with for this woman, feels like watching her on interviews in the internet and I'm starting to forget I am a part of this interview.

"And Shannon?"

" Yea?" I snapped from my gaze and turns to James who just raised his brows on me and a huge smile on his face. Okay, they caught me staring. I'm pretty sure of it.

"Its been a long time" He breathes and now I'm mentally calculating the last time I was here. The truth is, I haven't seen the whole interview apart from that moment where I was caught in the audience and I don't know shit of what I'm going to fucking say. Now, I'm starting to figure that I might come clean tonight and I don't know how would that go.

"Yea, well I got stuck in Dallas during lockdown so-"

"Oh so that's where you were." I smiled and nod. "You stayed there all this time you were out of the limelight?"

"No, actually. I just came back earlier this year because I had a call from the Kevin Feige to work with Marvel as a photographer." As soon as that went out the crowd applauded and that made me look at Elizabeth to see her giggling but I can still see her nerves just by the way she's fumbling with her rings again.

"So you two are working together again?"

"No, we're not actually" Elizabeth says and I nod in agreement. Well, I'm still in hopes I would get the shot of her for their movie.

"I still am on probation so I'm still working at the studio and not on-set so- but hey, you never know. Maybe I get to work with her again, just putting that out there." I winked at the cameras and I heard Elizabeth chuckles.

"Well we're hoping for that as well. Now you were in Dallas and Elizabeth has been in the UK since last year shooting a movie and you just came back last month ago. How was that? Did you get any fun, because you were in lockdown to"

I turn my attention to Elizabeth since she never told me this one before. We never talked about her recently and it was always about me and my memories which made me sad and curious actually.

"I was working so that was fun and I get to work with hundreds of people, so that's different. I also loved where I was living. I love being in England. I kinda want to live there, I love it so much. Kind of what I have here in LA."

"Oh yea, I've heard so much about your home here in LA, something like dreamy and relaxing." I smiled remembering what I felt the moment I saw her house it was indeed magical. She smiles in pride and nods at whatever James is saying because apparently, my eyes were just set on her. God, how did I end up with her? It still feels so surreal to be honest.

"So you're both home and I'm guessing from New York. Let's cut to the chase and if you don't mind me asking." I turned to James having the feeling what he's about to ask. Talking about New York that is just one thing. I can see from my peripheral view Elizabeth starts picking on her nails which is not a good sign and I want so bad to just hold her hand and reassure her. "Are you two officially back together or something?"

Elizabeth glances at me with a nervous smile on her face and I tell her in my eyes at my best that it's okay. She bits her lip and I looked at James before saying,

"Yes, you could say that" I smiled widely as the crowd releases a series of howls and cheers and it was a massive reaction for me to be honest, it makes my heart jump out of my chest. I glanced at Elizabeth and she scrunches her nose before letting out a cute giggle which is a relief to see. She's happy, I know but there's still something there. I really can tell.

"Oh wow, So how did it happened? Did you know it was going to get this big?" Before I could even stop myself from saying it, I blurted

"No, actually I didn't even had a clue that we existed" and that was that. Complete silence, you could even here a pin drop with how quiet the studio turned in.

"Can you just cut that out?"I hear Elizabeth whispered to James who is obviously so confused on what I just said, before releasing a heavy sigh. She turns to me and shakes her head saying,

"Just start all over again honey its okay." She's fidgety, uncomfortable. James beckons a producer and whispered something in his ear while Elizabeth is speaking to me but I couldn't quite get what she was saying until James says,

'We'll be having a short break and when we come back we'll talk about how this two lovebirds got back together.' A crew yells that we have stopped already. James and Elizabeth stood up from their seat so I did as well.

"Hey what was that all about?" James asks as he walks towards us. "Is everything alright?"

"Could you give us a minute or two" Elizabeth says in a serious tone ,which I know means trouble for me,before giving James a small smile. He nods and let us walk off stage with Elizabeth taking hold of my arm.

"We're not suppose to bring that up Shannon" She snaps as soon as we got to her dressing room and started pacing back and fort. I was utterly confused on the way she was acting. Yes, it slipped out but come to think of it there's nothing wrong about it and to be honest its quite liberating.

"I'm sorry, it slipped out." I whispered not quite sure why I'm feeling like I've done something so wrong. Was I not suppose to say the truth? Will I always have to pull the Dallas card every time I see someone I don't fucking know.

"How are we suppose to get through that?" She's mad and I'm guilty and I don't know why. I dropped my guard down and slowly walk towards her. She's breathing heavy and she's shaking. She needs to calm down. I apologize, for something I'm not so sure I should be apologizing for but here I am taking her in my arms and stroking her back gently calming her down.

"I'll think of something, I'm sorry." The words feel rough as it slides out of my mouth, but that doesn't matterright? Now, that she's having a panic attack again. I just hope she feels better when we go back on stage again.