Chapter 100

Chapter 100: (Helena's Point Of View!!)

 *4 months later! (January 2007)*

Things are getting worse and worse. All the holidays and birthdays passed. It was really bad. Marshall isn't himself. I feel Marshall slipping right out of my grip and I don't know what to do anymore. I was sitting on the couch just thinking when Hailie walked over to me.

"Helena something is wrong with Dad. He's acting weird again he's really beginning to scare me. He won't even shave and he pretends he doesn't hear me, and all he does is eat all that bad junk food." Hailie said as she stood in front of me.

"What? Where is he?" I asked her.

"He's taking a shower." Hailie replied.

 "I am going to go check up on him really quick okay. Stay down here." I told her as I got up.

 I started walking upstairs then I entered our bedroom quietly. The water was running so Marshall was taking a shower. I looked around the room a bit and threw out a lot of trash from all the junk food Marshall eats. I looked up on the wall and our wedding photo was there but I quickly looked away. I went and started making the bed. When I moved a pillow a little notepad with a bunch of lyrics was under it. Wow. Marshall's trying to rap again. I read a little of them when I came across a little paragraph that read;

"Or the hydrocodone you hide inside your pornos, your VCR tape cases, with your Ambien CR great place to hide 'em ain't it? So you can lie to Hailie, I'm going beddy bye Whitney baby, good night Alaina. Go in the room and shut the bedroom door."

 No. No. When it read that all I could think was to go check the basement. Marshall keeps all his old movies, VCRs, old CDs and God knows what else in a couple of shelf’s downstairs. I dropped down the notepad on the bed and started to run downstairs. Oh God please don't tell me I am going to find what I really don't want to. I quickly passed by the living room.

"Helena?" Hailie asked which made me stop.

 "I have to go downstairs really quick. I won’t take long. Stay up here okay." I told Hailie then she nodded.

I opened the basement door than ran down the stairs. I ran to the driors and shelf’s and started looking through everything. At first all I found was a bunch of old music and VCRs and Pornos.

 "Nice." I said as I threw them on the floor.

 I opened a few VCR cases and I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Pills.... A lot of pills. I looked through all of the boxes and found 2 huge bags full of pills. I just sat on the floor with the pills in front of me. No. Marshall's been getting high off of all this shit the whole time. I brought my knees up to my chest and just cried. A couple of minutes passed of me crying.

"Helena?" I heard Marshall say behind me.

I slowly looked back. I grabbed the bags of pills and threw them at him.

"All this time you have been doing this!?" I screamed through my tears.

Marshall just stood there starring at the ground. I got up and walked over to him and slapped him hard across the face.

"Answer me!" I screamed.

 "I am sorry." Marshall quietly said.

 "No. I can’t believe this Marshall. Why!?" I screamed as I just sat on the floor and cried.

 Marshall started to walk towards me.

"No! Just stay away!" I screamed as I looked up at him.

"Why!? Why!? Why? Are you doing this because of Deshaun?" I said through my tears.

 All he did was nod his head.

"Are you fucking stupid? What would Deshaun say if he was here right now? Stop using him as an excuse! Deshaun is up there... With God! He doesn't have to worry about anything up there. You have your daughters! Your friends and all those fans that love you! Why would you do this to us?" I said through my tears.

 I could feel my cheeks getting sticky from all my tears.

"Helena I am sorry!" Marshall screamed.

 "I have tried to help you. Instead you would just blow me off and treat me so bad. Do you have any idea how I have been feeling? I mean look at me! I don't sleep, I am losing weight like crazy from all this damn stress! While you were up there getting high I was here taking care of your daughters and worrying all night and day about you." I said as I cried.

 "You don't understand." Marshall quietly said.

"Maybe I don't... But you could have gotten help." I said as u looked up at him.

I felt my eyes swell up from all the tears and my nose getting red. Marshall just stood there looking at me.

 "I am done. I don't know what to do anymore." I said as I looked up at him.

"Helena. Please. I am sorry. I am so sorry. I don't know what to tell you but please... Stay with me... No matter how hard it is but... Stay with me. Please." Marshall told me as he started walked over to me.

 He kneeled down to hug me. I just sat there hugging him and crying. No matter how mad I was, how much I hated him at the time I still loved him so much and I needed him just how I know that he needs me. I am not about to throw away what I have fought for all these years. I am going to be as strong as I can be....

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A/N: I cried while writing this :(. Can you guys feel Helena & Marshalls pain :(. Plus Did you see what I did with Deja  Vu ;)...... Tell me how its going everyone :)

Just 5 more chapters to go then this fanfic is done! Thanks so much for everything ^_^