Chapter 9

The sea was a very beautiful place. It was vast, full of unkown beings beneath. Some people were afraid of it but I never felt that way. There's a lot of things in the below that I wanted to uncover. Ever since I was a child, I wanted to travel the world.

The breeze that came from the sea was always amazing. It always has a way to calm down my nerves. Whenever I feel so down, there were two places I would like to go. In the beach that was fifteen minute away from home or in our rooftop where I can also see this particular beach. To rest on the sand, feels so comfy.

I always loved beaches. Its sand was just the right hue of gold. I love picking up the starfishes and the crabs that were easily washed up ashore. But my favorite thing about it, was the gentle breeze that was like a whisper in your ears.

I was stopped from my thoughts when my best friend, Lloyd, appeared out of nowhere and sat besides me. He was topless but wearing the blue short I gave him on his last birthday. His blond hair was soaking wet.

"Wh—" I said, startled by him. "Why're you here?"

"Eh, I went out for a swim. It's been a while afterall." Lloyd smirked but it quickly disappeared. "Okay now, what's bothering you?"

I snorted and looked away. "What made you believe that something's wrong?"

It was his turn to snort. "I know you since daycare, Tala Crystalline. You can't hide anything to me."

I looked at his blue eyes. He looked so worried as his brows started to furrow. I don't know how to voice out my thoughts. Even if I did, I don't think he can help. But maybe talking will help me feel better.

"It's about Ace..."

"Ace? Your cousin?"

I nodded to that lie. "He never met his mother. She died when she gave birth to him. And he... He blames himself that his mother died."

Lloyd took it for a moment before responding. "I see..."

"And I kind of lose it when I confronted him about it. I just think that no one should blame themselves because of a death of a loved one."

We remained silent for a moment. My feet moved to the sand and just draw something. I patiently waited for Lloyd's any kind of advice per say.

"I don't really know that cousin of yours so I don't know what to say..." He scratched his scalp. "But I do know one thing, boys hate it when someone tried to reason them out."

"I hate boys." I scoffed.

"I'm a boy." Lloyd said with a stern tone, offended. "And your best friend."

I let out a small snicker. "I know. Just teasing you."

"But anyway, humans always like blaming theirselves in every situation. It's only natural. I can see why you try to confront him about it. How old was he again?"

"...Twenty."

"He held that for twenty years, huh? You know self-blame is really a toxic thing. Let him see a therapist, Tala."

I sighed. "He has trust issues. I don't think he's the type of the person who's willing to let strangers know his thoughts."

"Well, if you really want to comfort him. Just say that his mother did everything she could to get him in this world. Death is a natural thing. We just don't know when or how it would take us..."

I stared at him with my eyes wide. He looked so serious. His shaggy blond hair was waving because of the breeze. He has one of those soft smile. He somewhat looked so cute right now. 

I started wheezing. I hold my mouth because I can't contain my laughter.  "You... I never knew that you're into pilosophy.

"I'm tryin' to help you out and that's what I get?" Lloyd scoffed.

I finally get a hold of myself and smiled. "You're really helpful sometimes."

"Damn straight I am." He said with a proud smile. "Now, do you want me to accompany you or be alone?"

"I want to be alone right now. No offense."

"Eh, it's fine." He patted my head which made me glare at him. "Talk to your cousin, okay? Texr me later to know how it went."

He stood up and rubbed his shorts for any remaining sands. He stretched his arms in the air with his eyes closed.

"Hey, Lloyd." I called.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks..."

He let out a chuckle. "No problem, Tala."

I stared at him with bored eyes as he left. That talk did go well for me. Lloyd did have his ways into making me feel better. Call it charm but he always knew what were the words to say to comfort me. He also knew when do I need a company or be just alone.

Time passed by quickly. I've been in the beach for four hours now. I just stared at nowhere particular. Either at the sea, the seagulls, or just the other people enjoying the beach.

Call me weird but I could spend my entire day here without doing anything particular.

I watched the sky with an unwavering interest. The fiery orb of light slowly sank beneath the horizon. The sky was dyed with different colors. Orange, yellow and red were seen among the seas of clouds.

Sunsets were always beautiful. It's one of my favourite thing in the world.

"You really like being at the beach, huh?"

"Maybe..."

He silently sat besides me. I can feel his eyes looking at me but I looked away. His breathing was hitch.

I just buried my head into my thighs and crossed my arms together. I just don't know what to do or to say right now.

I felt him tugging something in my hair. My hands immediately moved to get that thing he just put.

"What's this for...?" I asked him. I stared at the red hibiscus that was in my hands.

"An apology." He said with a soft tone.

"You know, that hibiscus plant where you got this aren't allowed to be pick."I encircled the flower in my palms.

"I'm a pirate. I don't exactly follow rules." He gently laughed.

"Not in this world..."

He sighed. "If it weren't for you, I wouldn't know that my mother like those."

"She always wear one in her hair..."

"Now I know why I am so drawn to hibiscuses." He laughed. "Flowers are girly but I always make exception to hibiscuses... Now I know why, they are Mama's flowers."

I finally had the courage to look at him. He looked so relax. He was wearing a soft smile. His eyes were closed. The air blew his hair making it wave with the wind.

He was better now unlike earlier. I guess it did help that I left him earlier. Sometimes, people need to be alone. It kinda helps.

"Ace, I'm sorry about earlier." I finally found my voice to apologize. 

I am prideful. I never allowed myself to apologize first. For me, saying sorry was always out of my vocabulary. My brother and my best friend learned it the hard way. But this time, I felt like it because I really owe Ace on that one. I shouldn't have rush him into things.

I was supposed to comfort him but in the end, he was once again drawn to self-blame.

"Sorry?" He stared at me with a surprised look. "I should be the one apologizing."

My mouth dropped open. Before I could reply, he continued.

"Ever since I came here, all you gave me is kindness." Ace glanced at me. "And if it wasn't for you... I wouldn't know what my mother looks like."

"She's very beautiful... You even got her freckles." I commented. A smile slowly forming in my lips.

"I once asked Gramps about her. The only thing he told me is that I look like her." Ace explained. "I owe her a lot. She gave up her life for me. So that's why I took her name when I started my pirate life. For me, that's the only thing that I can do to honor her."

"I'm sure your mother's proud of you."

"Well, one thing's for sure." Ace's smile was slowly turned into a wide grin. "She's nothing like Dadan."

I laughed at the comment.

The silence that befell between us was comforting. It was very peaceful. We enjoyed each other's company.

"My mother..." Ace's quivered, his breath heavy. "She really do love me, didn't she?"

I looked up to him with a smile. I nodded. There's no need for words to be exchange. My eyes started to tear up again but I stop myself. This was suppose to be a happy moment.

In the end, showing Ace that clip of her mother did ended up well. He deserved to know her.

To know her mother who looked just like him. 

To know her mother who gave up everything just for him.

To know her mother who loved him dearly.

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"How did it went?" Justin asked me as I opened the door.

He was in my room laying in my bed. His arms were crossed at his nape. I didn't really expect him to be at my room at this hour.

He looked serious. Something you don't really see him do a lot. He was a happy-go-lucky kid. He was always smiling and goofing around.

To see him so grave right now, it astounded his older sister.

"It went well." I answered him. "You're the one who told him where I am aren't you?"

"Ace told me everything earlier." He shrugged his shoulders. "Knowing you, you'd be at the beach brooding all day."

"Am I really that predictable?"

He let out a small laugh. "Yeah. I also told him to apologize first since I know you wouldn't do it."

I smiled at him. How I loved my younger brother dearly. He really do know me completely.

I flop in my chair in exhaustion. I get my cellphone and unplugged it from my charger. I immediately texted Lloyd about earlier since he wanted an update.

"Next time, can you please tell me about what you're gonna show to Ace?" Justin told me after a while.

"Yeah, I'm sorry..."

"Don't you trust me?"

"What?" I was taken a back by his question.

I stared at my younger brother. My eyes wide and my mouth dropped open. He was frowning. He didn't looked at me instead looked at the other side of the room.

"I mean, you don't trust me to be alone with Ace. You always think I'll mess up."

I was silent.

"I know you're trying to help Ace. Let me help, too. We're siblings aren't we? Let me carry some of your burden." He slowly glanced at me and smiled.

I didn't reply. I quickly crossed the distance between us. I engulfed him into a tight hug. I feel like I'm such a bad sister. I didn't even considered what my brother was thinking about our situation.

"I'm sorry, Justin..."

"It's fine, Tala." He patted my back gently. "Next time, tell me your thoughts, okay."

I gently laughed. "I don't really understand why you're so easy to forgive me."

"Eh, you're my only sister. I don't really say it but I love you."

"Love you too, Jus."

"Ugh, now stop being mushy!" He complained in disgust.

I laughed. "Thank you."

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