8

BRIGHT'S POV

Last night? What the freak did I do last night? Did I do something terrible to make him avoid me? I was thinking but then Win led me to the cliff where we first met... 

"I'll be leaving two days from now..." Win said.

"You're going home?" I asked. 

"Yeah..." he said. 

"I'm going to get to visit my sister tomorrow." I said as we both stared blankly at the ocean.

He was silent after that talk... I didn't know what he was thinking or what he was referring to as "last night". What did I do? It was all a blur... I can remember him coming to our table, trying to get caught up with all the shots we already had, but did something else happened?

"Win... about what you said... last night?" I asked him when he has been to quiet already.

He remained silent like he was thinking deeply, he reeks of alcohol which actually made me think... has he been drinking already even before I saw him at the bar? Maybe he's too drunk already.

I went closer to him to ask him if I should take him home. I patted his back...

"You okay Win? Should I take you back to your room?" I asked. 

I suddenly felt an awkward air when he looked over to me, it was awkward yet there's another feeling in the air... it's like his eyes are communicating some of his secrets from the inside. It felt weird but at the same time tempting.

Win parted his lips and before we could both say something, I felt our lips touch, it was a kiss that the longer it lasted, the deeper and more aggressive our kisses went... we gasped for air when we parted our lips... I looked at him and he looked back, there were tension in his eyes and we were both lost for words until he found his voice and spoke up...

"That..." He said which got me confused. 

"W-what do you mean that?" I asked. 

"It's the second time Bright... we did it last night as well... d-do you feel it?" Win asked. 

At first I was confused with what he was asking about, then I realized... that feeling that overpowers the awkwardness... 

"Y-yes..." I said and looked away. 

"I never knew I'd fall for a guy until I saw you right at this very spot Bright. I'm leaving two days from now and I want to know if you'd like to give this a try... I know it's too early for it, but I know what I feel and I... like you. Tell me if we'd give this a try, so I'd know if we'll give this a chance or I'll completely forget you before I leave..." Win said. 

I was quiet... I didn't know what to think, this was all a little too much for me... I didn't expect things to escalate quickly at this point... I don't even know what to respond, I couldn't process all that has been happening tonight, the feelings and all... but I didn't want to loose Win as well... he makes me forget the shitty life I have. 

"I'd like to give it a try" I said and gave him a small smile. 

That night... that moment... we felt free of everything... No other worries and feelings. We shared another beer or two with each other before we decided to go back. 

"I really won't be seeing you tomorrow?" He asked liked a child asking his playmate. 

"I wish I could bring you with me, but there are multiple precautions that needs to be followed, we're still a pretty good target for my father's messed up connections." I said and gave him a small smile. 

It was too risky to be seen with someone, even my family when we go to the city... I went back to the villa to go get some of my stuff. I also told my friends I'd be sleeping in the house tonight so that I won't disturb them when I leave. 

"Bright, you stay safe" Love said before I closed the door. 

They all told me that they'd be waiting for me to come back... I don't even know if I can leave Ton if I see her... but of course, I lied again and told them it'll be easy and quick visit. 

"You sure, you're ready to see Ton?" Namtan asked me when I entered my room. 

"I wasn't sure about a lot of stuff in my life these past few months... It's just a hospital visit." I said and noticed my closest cousin Nanon was also there with Namtan. 

"What Namtan meant was you're gonna have to come back here no matter what happens, no matter how much you badly wanted to see Ton." Nanon said. 

"I don't have any other choice" I said and faked a smile. 

"Bright... mom won't force you to do things like Dad does, and I know how stubborn you can get when it comes to Ton, just please, when the visit is over, we have to move as quick as we can." Namtan said. 

I nodded and stayed silent. I know they were worried, but really, my life is pretty pointless at the moment so they won't need to worry that much about me.

It was a quiet night, it was also quick when my alarm rang off. I turned it off and hurriedly showered so that we could immediately leave. It was even before sunrise when we were all ready. The private jet was already waiting for us... It was me, Namtan and grandma... 

It was all heavy when I got in the plane... It's like I was dragged into the nightmare that I kept running away from... I wanted to run so far, but I also have to come face my demons... I don't have any other choices... 

Win

Hey, I know you couldn't reply yet... 

I saw you board the jet...

You seemed so nervous and scared

Everything will be alright, if not now, in time, it will be. 

I'll see you when you get back... :) 

Stay safe!

I smiled when I saw those messages from Win... He always has that thing that knows how to calm the storms in my head... It was also perfect timing that the sun was already slowly rising painting the skies pink and orange...

We arrived at the hospital and they followed protocol, we were led by a bunch of security team. The closer we walk to the ICU, the heavier I felt... I paused when I saw the ICU door, Grandma didn't stopped but instead she let Namtan come to go get me... 

"You sure you can do this?" She asked. 

"Y-yeah... I just need some air" I said. 

"Take as much time as you need." She said and we sat outside. 

My emotions were heightened, I was loosing all of it, I felt suffocated... It was another anxiety attack... I couldn't breathe and I gripped on the arm of the chair, I was shaking... 

"Bright!!!!" Namtan said and held me. 

"Bright... breathe... come on... breathe in..." She said.

After a few deep breathes and Namtan trying to calm me down, I settled, I was calm but there were still clouds of thoughts in my head. 

"Bright" Mom walked out of the ICU and immediately hugged me tightly. 

"Mom... are you getting rest?" That's the immediate question that popped in my head when I saw her lost weight.

"Oh, don't worry about me, how are you?" she said as she pulled away from the hug.

"I'm fine ma, you, do you need someone who can take turns watching over Ton?" I asked her. 

"No, I'm alright Bright." She responded. 

I noticed Namtan was quiet at the side, I looked at her and gave her a sincere smile. 

"You both come inside and see your sister..." Mom said. 

I sighed before going in when Namtan pulled my arm while mom was clinging to the other. 

"You sure now?" She whispered before we entered. 

"Yep." I whispered back. 

It was cold when we walked in, the special room in the ICU for Ton was filled with flowers, balloons and her favorite stuffed toys. I sighed when I saw my sister in her hospital bed... I wanted to cry so bad, feeling all the anger I have for Dad, this is his fault. 

We walked closer but as per doctor's orders, we can only go up 'til the viewing window. 

"Mom I want to go closer, just have a few stuff to tell her." I said trying my luck if she'd allow me. 

"Let me go get the nurses to assist you with the lab gowns and other stuff you need to wear when you get in there." She said as she patted my back. 

Namtan followed mom when they went to the nurse station just at the side of the ICU. I continued looking at Ton, Dad has to pay for this. He is solely reliable for everything that has been going shitty for this family, if only he wasn't so fond of money, this wouldn't be happening. We would be that perfect family he has been trying to show everyone. 

"I'd go see my doctor, I'll be back later so we could eat and stay for a little longer okay?" Grandma said. 

I agreed and waited for mom and Namtan, when they came back there was a nurse with a set of lab gowns and hair nets for us. 

"Let's go see Ton, closer" Namtan said. 

Mom gave us both a smile and we followed the nurse. Namtan was oddly quiet when we went inside. 

"Bright, you're gonna have to tell mom about those anxiety attacks." Namtan said. 

"I'll be fine, just act like nothing happened." I said trying to convince her not to give mom more reason to get worried for her children. 

When we were ready to go inside, the nurse led us in and we were allowed to go near Ton, it felt heavier and heavier in my chest as we got closer to her... This is not the time for another anxiety attack so I tried to calm my self down and sighed as I stepped forward. 

I looked at my sister, she was pale but she just looks like she was sleeping... If only there's something I could do... 

"We're gonna be praying Ton, hang in there, there would still be a lot of my drawings you'd get to see in the future." I said fighting the urge to cry as I held her hand. 

It was only for a few seconds when it was time's up for us. We walked outside and I gasped for air when we were finally out. 

"I'm sorry Bright..." Namtan said trying to stop some tears. 

"It's not your fault. It's Dad's." I told her as we took off the lab gowns. 

"I just couldn't protect you both as the older sister." She told me. 

"Don't blame yourself." I said. 

We waited for grandma to come back and mom asked Namtan to go order some food for us. 

"Bright can we talk?" Mom said and smiled at me. 

I was confused with what she wanted to talk about but I followed her until we reached outside of the ICU, the hall where I had my anxiety attack a while ago. 

"How have you been?" Mom asked when we sat down in one of the benches in the hallway. 

"I've been good, my friends are at the resort and I've met new friends." I told her. 

"Bright, Namtan told me what happened earlier..." Mom said with the obvious worry on her face now. 

"I'm perfectly fine ma." I said.

"Bright, I can't afford to loose all of you... Can you do me a favor and see a therapist, please" She said and tears began to fall. 

It was devastating to see my mom cry. She was just crying as she hugged for a few minutes until she calmed herself. 

"I am so tired and mad and everything, but you, Namtan and Ton are the only pillars in my life, please, please take care of yourselves, I cannot afford to loose any of you." Mom said wiping her tears away. 

"I'll be fine mom... I-I'll go see that therapist if you want me to" I said trying to fight the tears that were coming because seeing my mom breakdown in front of me was too much. 

She calmed down and went inside to talk to Namtan, I said I'd go get coffee, she asked some security personnel to come with me but I managed to bribe them and let me go to the hospital rooftop so I'd have time to think. 

My mind went blank for a long while when I arrived at the rooftop, I asked one of the security personnel to buy coffee so that my alibi would check out to my mom when I go back. Most of the time my thoughts are too much especially at the wrong timing but now, it's all blank, I couldn't process anything, I just felt tears streaming down my cheeks and I forcefully wiped them away as I closed my eyes and sighed so deep. 

The visit went quickly when I got back down to the ICU. We ate silently and we talked a little, I asked my mom if she needed help around and kind of hoped she'd allow me to stay with her here but of course it didn't work. 

When it was time to go back, I still tried convincing them I'd stay but then my uncle Kik came and said he'd go take care of Mom and Ton for me. I sighed and bid them goodbye as I went back to the island with grandma and Namtan. 

"We're gonna come back, we'd have to book an appointment with your therapist" Namtan told me and I ignored her. She told mom. Instead of keeping it to herself so that mom would not be bothered by me, she still told her. 

I was silent during the whole flight back to the island, I ignored everyone when we came back and I just went straight to the villa of my friends.

"Hey, how did it go?" Singto asked me. 

"Kind of terrible, but everything's gonna be fine. I wanted to stay but mom forced me to go back here." I said and plopped myself down on the sofa. 

"Chill there... the girls went out to get something to drink and all. We planned to go night swimming and also a little bonfire on the shore, go get ready." Krist said tapping my shoulder. 

I kind of got interested when they said that, I guess my therapy would always be drowning my demons with all the alcohol until I black out. 

When the girls came back they were laughing and teasing each other which got the three of us confused. 

"What are you both teasing each other about?" Krist asked them getting the bag of drinks they bought. 

"Oh, welcome back Bright!" Love said ignoring Krist. 

"Love likes someone and they talked tonight haha" Film said which made love blush. 

"Oh, maybe that owner could find out who that guest is..." Singto teased. 

"Omg stop it, he's just cute okay?" Love said and packed some stuff to bring along with her... 

We all went to the bonfire set up and we even raced to the waters when we've settled everything, we were playing and teasing like kids until I saw a familiar guy walking along the shore. 

"HEY WIN!" I called for him from the distance. 

"Hey!" He said and walked closer. 

"Come join us" Krist said and signal for him to go in the water. 

"Uhhmmm, I'll be fine here" He said and scratched his head. 

"Come on Win, it's your last night on the island, just join us" I said. 

He scratched his head and finally gave in and went in the water. 

"I'll see you soon I guess?" Win said when he got closer to me. 

"Silly. Don't say good bye yet. We still have a looong night" I said. 

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Thanks for reading! <3