03 | R E U N I O N

hold me in this wild world.

   ON THE MORNING of the first Hogsmeade trip of this year, Ember awoke with her face covered by a mass of brown feathers, and she flinched. Quietly shooing, Woody had laid down on his back straight across Ember's face.

   "Really, are you an owl or a cat?", Ember muttered, lifting the bird up, as it shooed again, this time sounding more awake and happy. Fluttering his wings, Woody landed on Ember's chest, excitedly hopping up and down. "Get your stuff together, Woods", she snorted, stroking his feathers. "You'll wake the other girls." Throwing a look on the watch on her nightstand, she silently groaned. "Five fourty-three? Really, you annoying chicken? Oh." It wasn't until now she noticed that there was a letter fixed on his claws. "Okay, c'mon, we're going to the common room. Susan will grill you, if you'll wake her up. Again ..."

   The common room was empty, and Ember flung herself in one of the armchairs close to the fireplace, where she finally freed Woody from the letter. Only her name was scribbled on the envelope, and her heart sunk, as she recognised the handwriting.

   Ember,

   I got informed that this Saturday there's a trip to Hogsmeade planned for you. Meet me at the Hog's Head around 1 pm.

   Love

         Remus

   Ember sighed. It wasn't a question; he hadn't asked her to come. The darkness inside her was growling. She probably shouldn't go there. He would ask all the questions she'd successfully avoided until now. As fortuna was on her side, Dumbledore as usual didn't care about her even a bit. She had expected him to call her to his office straight after she had appeared to the feast, but he didn't. Obviously, it wasn't important enough to be talked about, that she had spent three months in Voldemort's captivity, and now was back, just like that, without a scratch. No, again it was Harry having the fullest attention. Of course. He was the Chosen One.

   Ember snorted by the ridiculous thought of Harry even trying to stand a chance to destroy Voldemort. People couldn't really think that a teenage boy would be their saviour ...

   Throwing a gaze at the letter that was still in her hands, she took a quill from a nearby table and turned the parchment around.

   I'll be there, she scribbled down, folding the letter back together and stretched it out for Woody.

   "Bite his nose for me, will you?", she asked, as Woody took the letter in his beak and with a soft shoo flew through one of the circular windows someone had left open for the night.

·

   It's been a year since she last had made her way to the ominous pub apart from Hogsmeade's main street, and even though she had been dragged there by Fred and George, she still remembered the path like it had been just yesterday she had walked it last.

   Still this place wasn't her favourite; the shabby wooden door screamed everything but "come in", nevertheless Ember pushed it open. Just like last time, the pub was filled with the strangest of people. A werewolf reading the newspaper sitting in the midst of those didn't make it any more scurrilous.

   "Sirius once said, that if you don't want to get attention, you better seek a crowded place for private conversation", Ember greeted him in a cool tone as she stepped at the table. Remus obviously hadn't seen her coming, his eyes jerked up, and the Daily Prophet slid out of his grip. Before Ember knew, he was on his feet, and her throat was tightened by an uncomfortable knot, as he engulfed her in a hug.

   For a second, Ember didn't just know what to do. She had seen a lot coming; being scolded, or Remus being mad at her for not writing to him; being asked questions, getting into a cross-examination; reproaches hailing down on her ... She could have dealt with all of this. Every single of those scenarios she'd made up in her mind about this meeting would have failed to touch her in any given way. But this hug, this tight embrace, caught her utterly off guard, and an annoying sting appeared in the corners of her eyes, as after some awkward seconds had passed, she finally lifted her arms to reply on this loving gesture, shyly hugging Remus in return.

   When they parted, her eyes were still burning, and she was awfully aware that they had to be all red rimmed and swimming in unshed tears by now. Quickly she wiped them dry with the hem of her sleeve, before she sat down.

   "How are you?", Remus asked, taking that seat opposite to her, where he'd been placed before, his forehead wrinkled in sorrow, his eyes never for once leaving her face.

   "Brilliant", Ember snorted, her voice cracking under the heavy weight of the lump in her throat. Remus tilted his head, and she sighed. "Really, I'm fine", she added, wondering if she'd ever told a bigger lie. "I know you're here because you want to know what happened", Ember said, as Remus opened his mouth to speak. "Don't ask me questions and I don't need to lie to you."

   He pressed his lips together, examining Ember's face for a while, as if he was unsure if he should grant her this wish.

   "You're okay, you say?"

   "I'm alive", she mumbled.

   "That's not the same, you know?"

   Biting her bottom lip, Ember tucked down the end of her sleeves. "Things have changed. I just ... need to adjust to that Sirius is gone ..."

   Her voice broke, and something behind Remus Lupin's green eyes did as well.

   "Molly and Arthur send their regards", Remus changed the subject. "You're dearly invited to spend Christmas at the Burrow. It's still a couple of months to go, but she insisted to let you know. And Fred and George wanted me to inform you that they'll never forgive you, if you wouldn't come."

   The knot in her throat tightened, leaving her unable to speak.

   "I won't ask you what happened or what is going on", Remus quietly continued. "Just know that you're not alone. Remember that, will you? Sirius might be — be gone, but still there are so many people left loving you. We're your family, Emmie. Yours and Harry's, no matter what. We love you."

   Harry ...

   Something kicked into her mind, and her eyes narrowed. By the shocked expression on Remus' face she could tell that they were blackened in their usual creepy manner. There was a friendly reminder being sent from the darkest corners of her mind, that she had a mission, a task to succeed. There was no room for sentimentality ...

   "I — I need to go", she stammered, jumping so fast to her feet that the chair behind her fell to the floor with a clatter. "I'm sorry. I need to — just — oh Merlin, I'm so sorry ..."

   Without a last look at Remus, Ember stormed out of the pub an further down the small wynds of Hogsmeade, until her lungs burnt just as much as her tear flooded eyes.

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