𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗽𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗲𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁

It was a dark, stormy night, long ago...

No, it was not, and this was most definitely not a mediocre campfire story. Although it was night, it was a pretty shitty one, currently. So, unsurprisingly, you were scampering down the hallways of Blue Lock. Who would have thought, right?

Your arms were clutched tightly around your midsection while you dragged yourself toward the cafeteria. It was a pathetic sight, really. You walked in to see a figure standing under the lone light that illuminated the center of the room.

"Anri?" you rasped, face scrunched up in utter discomfort.

"Hey," she said softly, "I've got the goods." The whole interaction vaguely resembled a less-than-legal exchange, but who's to judge?

You sighed, "Thanks, I didn't think it'd start for a few more days but my cramps are already rampaging."

"It's all good," she chuckled, "Just make sure to hide this in your locker well." She passed you the bag filled with tampons and pads galore, did she buy out the pharmacy's entire stock?

"Mhm, well, I should go back. I've got to survive that game tonight."

You turned to walk out, "Good luck!" she called quietly after you.

"Thanks again!"

As you stepped through the doors, you thought you heard panicked footsteps around the corner. Delirium, maybe? It could be that there were players here that spent too much time in the hallways and leveled up to spirits. Sucks to be them.

You entered the bathroom, graphic detailing exempt, before you returned back to the Team Z room. Hitting Igarashi's face on the way back to your futon, the normal.

All was well.

All was not well.

Far from it. You felt like a reincarnation of Bachira from yesterday morning, no way in hell were you getting up.

Your cramps were practically debilitating. Equality of the sexes, my ass. It was one of those rare times you truly felt like you got the short end of the stick with a uterus.

As it goes, you were currently lying in the fetal position on your futon trying to not bawl your eyes out. There are no words in the English language to describe the utter anguish you were experiencing at the moment.

You heard shuffling and the shadows behind your eyelids lightened, so you assumed the lights had gone on and everyone was starting to wake up. The power of deduction, everyone. Although, the fact they had the ability to sleep was downright unfair.

Someone pushed your shoulder forward, "Kazuma? Are you okay?" It was Isagi.

"No."

"Uh," he drew a blank, "Well...what's wrong?"

"Everything, no one understands my pain," you mumbled. "My stomach hurts like a bitch."

"Maybe he just needs to take a shit." Chigiri piped in.

You ignored him and just continued to grumble under your breath until Isagi decided to speak again, "Do you think you can come to breakfast...?"

"Just go. I'm good. Totally cool. All under wraps." Lies. Lies! Liar!!!

"Alright..."

You heard he and Chigiri and Isagi's footsteps follow out of the room with everyone else's. You took a deep breath, it's cool. Happens all the time. Yet, it still hurts. Every time.

The silence in the room was sort of comforting, actually. Finally some peace in this place.

"Kazuma!" Gone. You've ascended. No way your soul is making it back to your body after a fucking jump scare like that. "Do you think chocolate would help you?" Bachira questioned from where you guessed was above you.

Your heart rate started to slow back down, thank god. Too early in the morning for a heart attack. "What do you mean?" You peeled one of your eyes to look back up at him. He was...grinning?

"Hmm, a heating pad, perhaps?"

"Huh?" Were the swirls on the ceiling real? Were your eyes deceiving you? Speaking of eyes, your lids were slowly beginning to shut over them. Sleeping was seeming especially attractive at the moment, maybe you'd be able to make up the night's sleep before the game.

You heard Bachira start to giggle before you conked out.

You stirred from your sleep, whoever knows how long later. Sitting up and stretching your arms out, you opened your eyes to find...nothing interesting at all, really. The guys were all in the room doing their own thing. Lame asses.

"Has princess number two finally arisen from his beauty sleep?" Raichi jeered for his bench.

You scoffed, "Yes! You should try it, you could use some help being a little easier on the eyes."

"Wish you didn't fucking wake up."

"I'm glad."

With a smile on your face you stood up from your futon, happily determining your cramps had subsided for the time being.

The speaker crackled, "Kazuma, report to my office."Scratch that, You were no longer smiling and most definitely no longer happy.

An "Oooooooooo!" residually sounded from Naruhaya, Gagamaru, and Igarashi. You flipped them off as you walked out of the Team Z room, slamming the door shut behind you. Did they think you were in middle school? That's harsh. They probably still were, mentally.

Guess who was in the hallways?

You.

It's always you.

There's only so many words to describe your current state of walking down said hallways, but you were in fact doing just that. The closer you got to Ego's office, the farther it seemed. Even your subconscious was trying to stall your arrival.

You knocked on the door and didn't wait for his assurance to step inside, "What do you want?"

"I don't want anything, brat. Your coach was pestering me with calls. He wants to talk to you." Ego was again in his obnoxious chair, swiveled around to face you.

"Does this mean I get my phone back?"

He just glared at you and extended his hand out, holding the device. You had no idea what your coach wanted from you, but you wanted that phone, for sure. You grabbed it and immediately saw the 12 missed calls at the top of the notifications. Lovely.

You stepped out of the office and clicked onto his contact.

"[Name]." He stated in a low tone. Not off to a strong start, not at all. The phone didn't even reach two rings.

"Hiiiiiii, Coach! What's up?" The nerves in your voice were hopefully not apparent to him, because they were sure as hell screaming at you. What did he want?

You could hear him suck in a deep breath on the other end of the line, "For fuck's sake, where have you been?!"

Huh? What does he mean 'Where have you been?' "What? I'm at Blue Lock, Ego Jinpachi should have told you, right?" If that bastard really plucked you out of your life to do this and left it to go to utter shit, that's it. You're getting charged with murder.

"Jesus Christ...Why are you in that place? It's been on the news, isn't it for male strikers?"

...I'm going to shove that fucker's foot so far up his ass, he'll be pulling shoelaces out of his nostrils, "I'm helping out in here. Staff, I guess."

He clicked his tongue through the speaker, "You do realize you're the striker for the women's U-20 team, right?"

"Look! I thought he told you I'd be here! And the season just ended." You heard him about to speak again, but you really had to try and tie your bullshit together, "I'm getting really good practice, I swear. I have to play all the time." Please don't burst a nerve. Please don't burst a nerve.

He released a deep sigh after a long moment, "...Fine." Thank fuck, "But, I've got something important to tell you when you get back."

"Sounds good. Great. Amazing. Stupend-"

"Okay. Bye." And, he hung up.

What a lovely guy, and an equally heart-warming conversation. You slumped down against the wall. This place was s-

"Give it back." When the hell did he open his door?

"Why didn't you tell my coach I was in this hellhole?" you glared up at Ego, and begrudgingly held your phone out. Hopefully he'd be willing to actually answer you if you didn't put up a fight.

"Forgot."

"Are you shitting me?"

"No." He turned around into his office and shut the door in your face.

Should you ever wish death on another person? No. Is it acceptable to wish death on Ego? Yeah. Encouraged, actually.

You glumly walked back into the Team Z room, too long of a fucking day.

Much too long, because as soon as you walked back in, the entire team was hounding Kuon. Good.

"What's going on?" You asked as you pushed your way into the group.

Raichi scoffed, "While you were off parading around, this scum has been non-stop spewing bullshit."

Kuon silently rolled his eyes and you scrutinized his figure, "That's not a surprise. What's got you so cocky, though, Kuon?"

"You guys're going lose the game, it'll be a ten versus eleven," he stated boredly.

You wanted to laugh. Maybe a little, an itty bit. But, you couldn't, because he could very well be right. It was quite literally day one of your period. "I guess, but at least we won't try to cheat our way out of it."

He went in to talk again, but you got the start, "We've been hanging onto the first selection by a thread. Flukes, really. We most definitely won't be able to master a repeat-goal ability in the next two hours. At least we aren't giving up the fucking participation trophy like you."

He stood up and started his way out, "Whatever, just don't expect my help on the field." With that, he left.

Thank god.

You sunk down on the floor with a long exhale, "He gets on my goddamn nerves like no one else."

Kunigami chuckled from beside you, "Tell me about it."

"You think we can win?" Normally, you'd go all out to help Team Z secure the game, considering the utterly unfair disadvantages. Buuuuuuut, your body did in fact pick the worse time to be a raging bitch. That participation trophy might be more realistic for this team than you wanted to admit.

"We're gonna have to try."

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i j started kuroko no basket and the coach is so cool i love her