30: Edward

AN: I could not find a good gif of Edward and Bella from New Moon, so you have to deal with this one.

EDWARD'S POVMarch 19th

"You'd better make her sit down before she falls," Katie warns me, glancing over at the side Bella's clinging to.

Alice bites her lip. "I agree, Edward. She's going to pieces." I see glimpses of Bella's legs giving out in her head, and realize they are both right.

Bella was trembling, her unnaturally pale skin even paler. Her teeth were chattering, and I wished more than ever I had any body heat to support her. Her eyes were watering slightly, probably blurring, and pull her towards the couch farthest from the nearest humans. "Shh, Bella." I coo, unable to stop myself from rubbing my hand down her hair. She leans into the touch, shaking, distraught by the massacre happening in the stone room.

Her sobs were loud and guttural, coming out raspy as she struggles to breathe.

"She's hysterical, Edward. Perhaps you should slap her," Alice suggests. My head snaps her direction with panic.

Katie just takes the spot next to Bella on the couch, pulling Bella's hands into her lap and rubbing them soothingly. For warmth or for comfort, I didn't know. Katie was hard to read. I was too accustomed to letting people's thoughts speak for them.

"It's all right," Katie murmured, low enough the other humans in the vicinity wouldn't be able to overhear. "You're safe. You're safe," she repeated.

Bella leaned her head on my shoulder, so I quickly wrapped my wool cloak around her to create a barrier between her and my cold skin.

"All those people," Bella choked out, the trembling worsening for a moment.

"I know," I find myself whispering back.

"It's so horrible."

"Yes, it is. I wish you didn't have to see that," I say earnestly. It's true. I wish she weren't here at all, actually. Either of them.

But I'm overjoyed at the thought of Bella being alive. My toxic heart feels renewed with a sense of purpose. A reason to be alive. My love. She curls into my chest, putting both hands under her forehead in a vulnerable position that seems so utterly... Bella.

I sense Gianna approaching before she makes her presence known. That seems unnatural. What is wrong with her? Her thoughts are judgmental of Bella. She thinks, briefly, that Bella isn't very pretty, and assesses Katie as somewhat fierce looking. "Is there anything I can get you?" She asks gently, unflinching at her proximity to us vampires.

"No," I reply coldly, holding her gaze until she retreats.

Bella glances up quickly, watching Gianna walk away, before asking "does she know what's going on here?"

"Yes. She knows everything," I answer softly. I tuck a stray piece of her hair away from her face.

"Does she know they're going to kill her someday?" Bella asks, eyes widening pitifully.

"Yes. She knows it's a possibility. She hopes they will keep her, instead." I watch her reaction closely. She seems sad, a bit disgusted. It makes a small part of me happy, knowing the possibilities of her response. But it also reminds me of the promise we were forced to make, and my face twists unhappily.

"Oh, Edward," Bella cries, burying her face in my chest again.

Her tears send another spike of panic through me. "What's wrong?" I ask gently, rubbing her back in gentle circles.

She doesn't respond for a moment, snaking her arms around my neck. Alice, who has tried to keep her thoughts, lets one slip out on accident, so I know what Bella is about to say before she says it. "Is it really sick for me to be happy right now?" Her voice breaks several times throughout the sentence.

I still at Bella's words. Katie stands abruptly, taking a few strides away from the conversation. "I'm getting water," she says as an excuse, not bothering to look over her shoulder.

I ignore the dramatic outburst and pull Bella tighter to my chest. "I know exactly what you mean," I admit in a whisper. "We have many reasons to be happy. For one, that we are alive."

"Yes," she whispered back. "That's a good one."

"And together," I add, unable to stop myself. She stirs, but nods. "And hopefully we'll still be alive tomorrow."

"With any luck," she agrees.

"The outlook is quite good," Alice assures. Her thoughts dance around, but her main concern is talking to Jasper. "I'll see Jasper in less than twenty-four hours," she says with a satisfied smile. However she tries to hide it, she is longing to be with him again.

Bella looks up at me and holds my gaze, something like regret in her expression. It's bittersweet, perhaps unconvinced, but I just stare on back. I wonder if she can see the apology in my stare. The love radiating from every fiber in my existence.

I brush my fingertips lightly over her dark circles. "You look tired."

"You look thirsty." She says, avoiding my observation.

My stomach churned. "It's nothing." Honestly, the thought of losing her had made me invulnerable to even the thought of drinking her blood.

"Are you sure? I could sit with Alice," she suggests.

I shake my head, unwilling to let her go. "Don't be ridiculous," I sigh, closing my eyes briefly. "I've never been more in control from that side of my nature than right now."

Bella just stares at me again. I stare back, gratefully taking in every one of her features. Katie returns, murmuring angrily about there being no pay phones, and begins to plan our departure with Alice.

Eventually, I join in the conversation, offering up my suggestions, but keep my eyes glued to Bella. She's fighting sleep now, evident in the slow blinks and droop of her eyelids. Being Bella, she's stubbornly refusing to give in, slightly adjusting every minute or so to wake her body up.

I leaned down and kissed her lips every few minutes, unable to resist myself. Every time our lips touched, she sighed quietly, and it gave me a thrill.

As the sun set down, we were free to leave. Gianna led us through a less incriminating exit, one that led directly into the inter city. It was windy above ground, but warmer than underground.

I had been required to put the cloak back on, so Katie shrugged off her coat and draped it over Bella. Bella murmured her thanks as Katie wrapped her arms around herself.

I had yet to acknowledge my thanks for Katie. It was selfish of me. She had followed Bella here, saved her life, even volunteered to test Jane's ability on herself to protect Bella. I should say something, anything to her. But no combination of words seemed good enough for my gratitude. And Katie likely wouldn't accept them, either way.

I know she hates me. Loathes me, if her body language was any indication. But she loves Bella, and that's enough for me to trust her. Besides, I couldn't blame her for her hatred. My kind had done nothing but meddle with her life. And I had personally hurt her, by leaving Bella.

Bella used me like a crutch, most of her weight leaning on my side as she peeked from the entryway. Her head was swiveling around in confusion. "Where's Alice?" she asked, drawing me back to the present.

She must be really out of it, if she hadn't noticed Alice leave. "She went to recover your bags that she stashed earlier."

Bella perked up. "She's stealing a car, too, isn't she?"

I couldn't help but grin. "Not until we're outside."

I led Bella into the car Alice pulled up with, sitting in the backseat with her. I didn't bother insisting to drive— I wanted to be with Bella.

"I'm sorry," Alice gestured at the car apologetically. "There wasn't much to choose from."

"It's fine, Alice." I joke. "They can't all be 9-1-1 Turbos."

She sighed longingly, shifting the car into drive. "I may have to acquire one of those legally. It truly was fabulous."

"I'll get you one for Christmas," I promise, taking hold of Bella's hand again.

Katie snorted in disbelief.

Alice beamed. "Yellow," she clarified.

I wrapped my arms around Bella again, stroking her hair. "You can sleep now," I whisper, hoping she'll give in. "It's over."

"I don't want to sleep. I'm not tired." Bella protests, closing her eyes.

"Try," I murmur into her hairline.

She shakes her head.

The silence stretches comfortably for a moment. "Can you hand me my bag?" Katie asks, twisting back from the passenger seat.

I reach over and pass the small backpack forward, wondering what she's planning on doing. She rummages through the bag and pulls out her cell phone. At first, I think she's about to make a call, but she hesitates, putting the phone back in her bag. I assume she either realized she won't have the service to make such a long-distance call, or she doesn't want to be overheard.

"Will I have cell service at the airport?" Katie asks Alice.

Alice tries to scan the future, but to my confusion, she sees nothing. It doesn't deter her. "Because of who you want to call, I can't tell whether or not your cellphone would have enough reception. I can tell, however, that there will be a payphone in Rome."

"Okay, thanks," Katie nods, as if this is enough explanation for her, leaning her head against the headrest in defeat.

"I'm sure he will pick up," Alice assures. "At least to see that you're alive."

I gather, from Alice's thoughts, that she's talking about Jacob Black. "Who are you trying to call?" I ask, just to be polite. "Charlie?" I want to ask why Alice can't see the future with him, but refrain.

"Jacob," Katie says, clearly seeing through me.

"Jacob Black," Bella specifies, for my benefit. I realize that he must know that they left, otherwise Alice wouldn't have bothered comforting her.

I remember Bella telling me he was the one that tipped her off about me being a vampire. "A friend?" I ask, curious.

"Something like that," Katie says dismissively.

"Closer than a friend? Or not quite a friend?"

"For me to be more specific, I would need to give you an explanation, and I'm too tired at the moment," she says with some venom.

So something more, then. From Alice's thoughts, I can quickly gather that he's important to the story of how our miscommunication happened. "So, he knows you're in Italy?"

Although I can't see her, I can tell that she rolls her eyes. "Yes."

"Does he know why you're in Italy?"

"Does it matter?" She asks, clearly annoyed.

I sigh in frustration. "Do you think it matters?"

She shrugs. "No."

I frown. "If he knows that I came to see the Volturi, he knows too much. He—"

"— can take care of himself," she interrupts with edge. "So you can drop it."

"Katie," I protest, trying to continue.

"Don't call me that," she snaps.

My frustration is growing. "Fine. Don't you think that him knowing puts himself at risk?"

Katie swivels to level a glare at me. "Are you so self-centered that you can't listen to anyone besides yourself? Are you so entitled that you don't know how to talk to people when you can't read their thoughts? I said he'd be fine. If you want an explanation, you'll have to wait until I'm in a better mood." She turns back to face the dashboard, shaking her head in anger.

Bella touches my arm to get my attention. I stroke her hand soothingly, keeping my gaze locked on Katie. "Fine." I allow.

The flight to Rome was so short that Bella easily resisted sleep. The flight from Rome to Atlanta, however, was going to be much longer, and she needed to sleep.

When we made it to Rome, Katie beelined for the pay phone. Less than five minutes later, she returned defeated, saying that the phone would only make local calls. She'd have to wait until we made it to Atlanta to try again.

When we boarded the flight, Katie eagerly took the window seat next to Alice, holding her book in her lap but staring out the window. Within a few minutes, she was asleep.

Bella and I sat in front of them. She, on the other hand, was holding my hand, struggling to stay awake, but too stubborn to give in. She asked the flight attendant for a Coke, and I frowned at her. She had an extremely low caffeine tolerance. Even the flight attendant thought that she looked tired, but obliged anyways- it was her job.

"I don't want to sleep," Bella murmured as I tried to lull her into closing her eyes. "I'll have nightmares."

I didn't argue with her after that. She had always been prone to tossing in her sleep. It would do her little good to close her eyes and wake up in a panic. Besides— I was selfish, and liked her awake. She is my favorite company.

So I traced her lips. Her hair. The side of her nose. I kissed her everywhere, save her lips. I could save that for later. For now, I was so grateful that she was here, in my arms. Being herself. Breathing. Shuddering when my cold hands touched her somewhere unexpected. If I had a beating heart, it would be thundering.