𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝟛𝟠

-나는 그들의 것, 그들은 내 꺼야-

-areum's pov-

i woke up the next morning by my alarm, i completely forgot i needed to go to school today

"i hate tuesdays" i mumbled, i slowly got up, my legs like noodles

i had no energy, i didn't even eat last night

i wobbled to my bathroom and looked in the mirror, "they can be so cruel" i whispered, "my fucking life" (a/n referring to the conversation she had with soonyoung)

i looked down at the sink and started washing my face, to get the tear stains off my face and to try to stop the burning eyes. i took a quick shower and changed into my uniform and looked at myself in the large mirror

i took in a deep breath

i walked downstairs but the silence in the house was concerning, "aren't they back yet?" i mumbled, "it's too quiet"

"guys" i called out, hoping to hear a response, i turned the corner to the kitchen and saw all of them looking solemn, staring into nothingness

"good morning" i said and they finally looked at me, they all just hummed, "what happened? was the mission... was their mission successful?" i hesitated remembering what the mission actually was

they killed people...

"no, it wasn't" wonwoo mumbled, he looked down at his black dress shirt and i saw a tear

"what happened?" "they had wooden bullets is what happened, and they knew we were coming" mingyu said standing up

"don't worry about it" he smiled, "we have to get to school, let me make breakfast for you" his mood changed completely, from a raging fire of anger to a cheerful gaze

i nodded slowly and sat down at the kitchen isle, soonyoung next to me, i was still angry at him so i didn't look at him

🌷

we finally arrived at school. my mind not leaving the thought of their aura just a while ago, i could still tell they were fuming

i was in a car with mingyu and wonwoo, and they spoke nothing of what happened. i tried asking them but they didn't want to tell me the details

but i tried to keep my mind off it, not wanting to get myself worked up

i walked ahead of them, still being mad at soonyoung for last night, not wanting to be around them. but it's still inevitable that i will see them because i still have classes with them

today was a B day, (a/n american school works like this: you have eight classes, but you also have A day and B day, on A days you have all your odd classes and on a B day you have all your even classes, idk how they do it on other parts of the world but this is how american schools mostly works), meaning i only had one class with soonyoung, meaning i didn't really have to talk to him

i walked into my first period and saw myungho, mingyu, wonwoo, and joshua already inside the classroom

🌷

i spent the rest of the day trying to avoid them. it was a total failure. it's rather hard to not talk to them if you have classes with all of them and i basically live with them...

"areum, the car is this way!" joshua shouted for me, but i just stood at the entrance of the school not moving. when he noticed i wasn't going anywhere he started walking towards me, "what's wrong? we have to go home" he said extending his hand

"can't i just walk home?" i asked, "why don't you tell me what's wrong first?" he said tilting his head a bit, with a knowing smile, "i'll tell you if you let me walk home" i negotiated

he sighed for a moment, looking back at the others who were already in their cars, "fine, but i'm going with you" he said pointing at me

"thanks shua" he chuckled at the nickname, "come on, the house is far away" he took my hand in his and we started walking

🌷

at first we were walking in silence, taking in the breeze and the scent of spring coming in a few months (a/n they're in january 5th) and the sound of the cars passing by and the leaves rustling on the trees

the chattering of people was calming, it made me feel warm and happy because it felt like the complete opposite of loneliness

but that silence between us was broken when he spoke, "are you going to tell me or?" he said dragging out the 'or'

i let out a small sigh, "soonyoung and i had an argument" i looked down at the ground, "what did you fight about?" i think he felt like he was walking on eggshells, he was careful about his choice of words for some reason

"I don't know if i should tell you" i mumbled "why?" he had a confused expression, "because i'm technically mad at you too"

"why would you be mad at me?" "because right now it feels like i have no real choice in the life i'm living" i stopped for a moment and looked up at him

stupid tall people

"areum, of course you have a choice in your life, it's yours" he held my hand, "he said he wouldn't let me turn" i mumbled

he grew silent and his face went cold, he let go of my hand

we stood there for a second, i waited for his response, "why would you want to turn?" he narrowed his eyes at me

"shua, it's not about me turning. it's about me not having a real choice! i don't actually want to turn but i also don't want to die. i don't want to see your faces when i take my last breath!" i shouted, drawing the attention of the people that were walking by us

"we aren't arguing about this here!" he whisper shouted and grabbed my hand and started walking somewhere more secluded

he took me to the back of a building where there wasn't anyone

he took in a deep breath and breathed out, like he was trying to calm down

"areum, it's true we don't want you to die, but we also don't want to see you become a vampire. we don't want to see you change into a monster like we did" he explained, "we'll talk about this later, when you're older"

he spoke in a call voice but when you read between the the lines he sounds angry

joshua has always been level headed and he's almost never raised his voice to anyone. he always knows what to say and what to do under pressure, i envy that about him

it must be because of all the years he's lived

"now you're just treating me like a child" i mumbled backing away a little, "because you are" "i'm 17 i should be able to make my own decisions"

"hell, i'm turning 18 in just a few months!" i snapped

he looked at me with an angry expression

"you can make your own decisions but you are not turning. i won't say it again" he was finally showing his real emotions

🌷

i spent the next few months not speaking to soonyoung, still avoiding him, i avoided all of them as much as i could

there are times when i wish i didn't know them, times where i wish i was normal. with a normal family and real friends, with cousins and aunts and uncles. a normal life. a life where myungho had never found me in that ditch, where my parents had never given me up and loved me properly. those are the bad days where i don't want to exist

but then i think, i would've never had them. i would have never met them, or seen their smiles and laughs. i would've never gotten to hear seokmin and jihoon sing, i would have never eaten mingyu's delicious food, never seen chan and soonyoung dance, i wouldn't have the memories i have now. the memories of them

but unfortunately today is one of those days where i don't want to be here

🌷

a/n also i won't be posting for the rest of the week because i'm ✨testing✨ wish me luck!!

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