Chapter 24

Zoe

As the next few weeks go by, I barely talk to Blaise.

I'm more than just freaked out by what Julian said in the common room - I'm terrified. Despite the many hours I've spent obsessing over it, I still can't figure out how he knows so much about me. The attacks, my history with my birth parents - he seems to know it all. As much as I try to erase him from my mind, there's an eerie voice in the back of my head whispering that he knows even more about me than he revealed that night.

There's only a few people who know about my parents abandoning me when I was a baby: Eric, Stevie, my grandpa, and more recently, Blaise. During a tutoring session earlier this year, I'd blurted out the whole story to him in a moment of weakness. I'm currently cursing myself for that dumb decision. The only way Julian would've found out about my parents is if somebody told him, and I'm willing to bet that it wasn't Stevie or Eric. Who else could it have been but Blaise? Maybe he told Julian during one of our countless arguments this year. Some day, I'll gather the courage to ask him if he really did do it. But that day hasn't come yet - mostly because I'm too afraid to hear his answer.

For awhile, Blaise begged me to tell him why I was avoiding him. The more I refused, the more frustrated he got, and the more he itched to know. But more recently, he's become distant, cold, even tired. I can tell something isn't right with the Slytherin boy, but I don't bother asking what it is. Right now, I'm too preoccupied with my own problems to get caught up in his. Even if I did ask, he wouldn't tell me; Blaise has never been keen on answering my questions. So for now, Blaise and I's conversations have been reduced to tense little interactions: short and sharp exchanges of words during classes and tutoring sessions.

But my suspicions about Blaise aren't the only reason I've been avoiding him. Truthfully, I barely talk to anyone at all. Stevie and Eric are the only ones that really hear from me, because most days, the thought of leaving my dorm is terrifying. I'm worried that if I do, I'll meet Flint in the hallway, or Julian will be waiting to stun me with more of my darkest secrets. Worse yet, I fear that the person who wants me dead will be hiding around a corner, wand at the ready with the killing curse on their lips.

As the snow falls heavier and heavier over the Hogwarts grounds, I become more and more desperate for the arrival of winter break. I want to go home to my small, fishing-pier town on the outskirts of Copenhagen, because one thing has been made clear to me: Hogwarts may be safe for everyone else, but right now, it's not safe for me.

***

"My lovely ladies, I have spent weeks planning out every day of our first official winter break together, so listen up. Day one: arrive home at seven o'clock evening time and caravan back to Copenhagen. Bed time for everyone is nine-thirty sharp, because beauty sleep is a must. Day 2: wake up at seven o'clock so we can scrapbook for three hours until Pasche's opens. When Pasche's opens, we go and sample all forty-two flavors of ice cream and then leave before they report us for theft. Then, we head to the..."

I've officially tuned Eric out - my mind is too cluttered to comprehend his dynamic plans right now. I'm glad to be escaping both Flint and my attacker for a couple of weeks, but it still frightens me to think about all of it. Despite all the dark and scary things, I can't seem to shake the thought of one person from my mind: Blaise. I wonder what lies ahead for the dark-skinned, mysterious boy and I - especially after our many ups and downs this year. I want to stop thinking about him, to completely wipe the image of his smooth face and intelligent eyes from my mind. I can't though, no matter how hard I try.

Before long, the Hogwarts Express is pulling in to King's Cross station.

***

Platform nine and three-quarters is exactly how I remember it.

Bustling with students and their proud parents, magical pets chirping here and there. I remember how I felt the first time I stood here; I was thrilled to finally be a Hogwarts student. The memory makes me smile softly.

My grandpa greets me and both of my friends with big hugs, a bundle of colorful balloons, and a few tears that he tries to hide.

"I'll take your luggage to the car and pull it around to the front of the station." He grins, and lifts our three heavy trunks onto an enormous cart. "Don't move a muscle!"

"Let me come with - I'm freezing my behind off." Eric shivers. Stevie seconds him, and rushes after the two of them as they hurry away.

I agree to wait behind, and it's not because I don't want to get home as fast as possible. I've spotted Blaise.

He's standing in a less-crowded area of the platform, maybe twenty feet away. I can tell he's alone, and we haven't had a real conversation in weeks.

A sudden burst of bravery and adrenaline prompts me to pace over to him and pound him on the shoulder.

"Ouch - what the hell -"

"Sorry. I didn't mean for it to be that hard." I say quickly.

The tall boy turns to face me, wearing a look of surprise and satisfaction. "Oh. So you're talking to me now?"

"No. I just need to ask you something, then back to eternal silence it is."

"Great." He smiles bitterly, crossing his arms. "Let's get this over with, then."

Peering up at him from below his shoulder-line, I start to feel intimidated. My burst of bravery is quickly vanishing, and before it completely disappears, I need to ask him the question I've been thinking about for weeks.

"Did you tell Julian what I told you about my parents?" The words burst from my mouth all at once.

Blaise's face twists in confusion. "What?"

"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. I told you that - that they abandoned me when I was a baby." I say the last part in a hushed voice, so no one can hear it but us. "I told you, Blaise, and I didn't tell anyone else. And somehow, he found out about it and announced it to the entire common room a few weeks back."

Blaise is quiet. His face lies somewhere between disgust, confusion, and shock. I can tell something is boiling beneath his skin, and it makes my heart race.

"So...did you tell him?"

"I'm pissed that you would even ask me that." He spits. "I told you I don't get along with Julian. Why the hell would I ever tell him something personal that anyone told me, let alone something personal that you told me? Did you even think about that, Zoe?"

I bite my lip, suddenly not feeling so confident anymore. "Well, yes, but - I couldn't think of any other explanation for how he knew. It's not ridiculous of me to think that, Blaise. I don't even know you. You've barely told me anything about you."

"I tell you more than I tell most people." He says. "I know I'm a dick sometimes, but I'm not evil. I was hoping you'd at least know that much about me."

For a few seconds, our eyes remain locked on each others, almost as if we're competing to see who can stare the longest.

All I can think about is the way you kissed me. The feeling of your lips brushing on mine was electric. When you touch me, I melt. Even when it's just your fingertips grazing my arm.

As soon as I feel the words rushing towards my lips, I swallow them down. My heart is racing. I haven't even admitted to myself that I feel that way about Blaise yet, and I almost just blurted it all out in front of him.

My eyes snap downward. I can't look at him anymore. He wins.

"Sorry." I say, my voice trembling. I walk away feeling shaken.

***

Blaise

I run my hand over my scalp as I watch Zoe scurry away, knowing I won't see her for at least another two weeks.

I'm irritated - so irritated that I feel like if someone touches me or even speaks to me, I'll curse something. I don't know whether I'm more frustrated with her or with the effect she has on me.

Do you know what it's like to be in a full-fledged argument with someone, and all you want to do is kiss them?

It pisses me off. No girl has ever made me feel like that before. In fact, I don't think I've ever had feelings about any girl that come close to how I feel about Zoe. Sure, I had those short-lived, fake relationships that everyone has during their first years at Hogwarts - the ones where you tell them you love them after two hours. But once I got older, a little more mature, all I did was hook up with girls. Until now, that is.

Now, I'm frustrated and irritated and pissed because one girl has disrupted my whole life. The way I see things, the way I think about things. Everything.

My train of thought comes to an abrupt halt when I see a thin, dark-skinned woman approaching me.

"Hello, Blaise." She says with a soft smile. I feel my fists clench at my sides. I think to myself that she hides it well - the selfishness, the wickedness. "I have a lot planned for you in the next two weeks. You'll be very...busy. If you know what I mean."

I nod, trying not to show the dread pooling in my stomach.

My mother is an evil woman.

***