Nikki

I woke with a start, jumping slightly and my head whipping around in every direction. I took in the room around me, realizing that none of it looked familiar. Everything was white: white drapes, white walls, white floors, white sheets.... And then, my eyes caught a spot of color in all of the blank spaces, and there he was.

"Bret."

His chest was bare, the sun light pouring in through the window caused his bronze skin to glow. His eyes were still closed, just like they had been when I had arrived, but fluttered lightly while he slept. There were some machines and wires attached to him, but I tried to ignore those like CC had suggested earlier. Instead, I smiled at the red bandana wrapped around his head, happy to see something so familiar on him. Something so human.

"Oh, Bret..." I sighed softly. I reached out a hand and latched onto him, giving his fingers a light squeeze. I absolutely despised seeing him like this. He looked so broken and weak. It was a complete contrast from his usual, bubbly self. It damn near broke my heart.

"I see you've been keeping him company."

A voice caused me to nearly jump out of my skin. I spun around to see who it was who had spoken, and I gasped at the figure standing in the doorway.

His black hair was disheveled and falling into his face, creating a spiky curtain that I could just barely see through. He had developed dark circles under his eyes, and his cheek bones protruded a bit more than usual on his now very gaunt face. He wasn't wearing his usual make up, but there was no mistaking it. He was Nikki Sixx.

He stood in the door frame, motionless. Looking him up and down, I saw that he wore a leather jacket with no shirt underneath, and tight jeans with holes all along the legs. I couldn't help but notice how much skinnier he had gotten since the last time I'd seen him. His skin seemed paler than usual and he had a strange look in his eye. A mixture of fury and pain. I gawked at him, not sure of what to say in response.

We hadn't spoken in months, but it felt like years. And now, here he is, standing and staring while my boyfriend lays half dead in this bleach soaked hospital room. He had so many chances to call me, to come visit me, and this is how he decides to re-enter my life? Talk about bad timing.

"Nikki..." His name felt strange on my tongue. I had been forcing myself for so long to suppress memories of him. To pretend like he had never existed. I hated thinking of him, hearing about him, and-obviously-even saying his name.

I hated how good it felt to finally say it.

"What're you...what're you doing here?" I murmured, still not quite sure if this was real or not. I was watching him carefully, scared that looking away would cause him to disappear. Equally as terrified that looking away would cause him to come closer.

At first, he said nothing. His eyes left me and instead began trailing up the hospital bed until they rested on Bret's sleeping face. Nikki's lip twitched slightly.

I gazed after him, confusion playing across my features. I couldn't think of any reason why Nikki would care to visit Bret in the hospital. Not that Bret and Nikki hated one another, but they also didn't really care for each other either. Bret especially didn't like Nikki after knowing that the two of us had dated. Then it hit me.

Maybe Nikki is here for me.

The thought stirred up a familiar feeling in the pit of my stomach. Something I had felt before when Nikki and I had kissed in the kitchen all those nights ago. The thought also brought up a slew of questions, ones that I wasn't sure I had the answer to.

Why me, and why now? Why would Nikki show up in Bret's hospital room, after months of not having anything to do with me? Why does he look so frail? Why is he staring at Bret like that? What the hell is going on?

"I'm guessing you make hospital visits to 'real' boyfriends only, huh?"

He spat the word 'real' like it was venom in his mouth, and I watched as his tired eyes flickered back to me. I returned his gaze with a confused furrow of my eye brows.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

He rolled his eyes and heaved an exasperated sigh. "Don't play dumb, Winter. Everybody knows by now. There's no way you couldn't know, unless your head has been shoved up Bret's ass this whole time."

My mouth fell open. "Excuse me?"

"Tell me," he continued, feigning curiosity by putting a finger to his chin. "How long has it been since you've seen the light of day? Does it smell good up there?"

Now I was as equally pissed off as I was utterly confused. What was Nikki talking about?

"I'm sure it smells better than yours," I shot back.

"Oh, I know it does! It explains why you're visiting Bret in the hospital but never came to see me!"

His voice crackled by the time he had gotten all of the words out, and I saw his lip beginning to tremble. His fists clenched and unclenched at his sides, and his whole body began to shake. The sight of him damn near crushed my heart.

"Nikki," I began, my voice softer now. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Now, I was just as much distraught as I was inquisitive. Why had Nikki been in the hospital? When had he been in the hospital?

The thought of something horrible happening to Nikki and me not being there to help him through it...I shook my head, trying to clear the thought from my mind. It hurt too much to bear. Instead, I began scanning over his body once more. I wanted to be more meticulous in my search this time, searching for clues as to what Nikki had gone through over the passed few months.

I saw no visible scars or burns, no bumps or bruises. There was no cast or gauze, and he obviously wasn't wearing a gown, so I doubted he was still checked into the hospital. So what had I missed?

He simply shook his head and snorted. His eyes fell to the floor and he smiled softly, a shadow cast across his features. "I've been imagining this day so many times in my head. Ever since you left...all I could think about was seeing you again. And this is what I get?"

For a moment, I stared at him like a deer in headlights, not sure of how to respond. Was he serious? Ever since I left? The accusation brought the fury in my gut to a boil, and I felt it boiling over and tumbling out of my mouth.

"When I left? How about when you left?" I demanded, my sadness and confusion finally giving way to anger. "You know what? This is what you get, and you're getting exactly what you deserve! You stopped talking to me! You said you'd be my friend and you left me without any explanation! Yet you think you deserve some grand celebration when you decide to waltz back into my life?"

I didn't realize how loud I had gotten until I had finished speaking and my voice caused a strange ringing sound to echo around us. I glanced over my shoulder to make sure I hadn't disturbed Bret. He lay motionless, in the same position he had been in before.

Of course he's still sleeping. He's in a coma, you idiot, I reminded myself.

I turned back to Nikki. We glared at one another, both of us seething at this point. Rather than yell at him some more, I waited to see what his next move would be.

He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted before he could even utter a word.

"Can I help you, sir? You look lost."

Nikki turned slightly, revealing CC standing behind him in the hallway. He held a cardboard cup holder full of coffees and had the rest of Poison trailing behind him. I almost didn't recognize Rikki Rockett and Bobby Dall, who looked just as pissed off as CC, and just as tired. They always looked so different without their make up on, and I doubted the sleepless nights over Bret helped much either.

"What're you gonna' do, CC?" Nikki scoffed. "You and your band of pussies lookin' to fight?"

CC bit his lip roughly, and I noticed the other two stiffen. He looked passed Nikki, and locked eyes with me.

"This fucker bothering you, Win?"

I knew CC wanted to destroy Nikki for that last comment, and I kind of wanted him to. But I had read somewhere that patients in a coma can hear what is going on around them, and the last thing I wanted to do was give Bret bad dreams and horrible sounds. He needed peace and rest, and I didn't want Nikki to ruin that for him.

"No," I murmured, my eyes shooting daggers at Nikki. "He was just leaving."

Once again, a flash of hurt clouded Nikki's eyes. But he was soon back to being an asshole as he shouldered passed CC and the guys.

"I wouldn't be so quick to protect her, boys. Maybe you should be looking out for your bandmate instead," Nikki warned as he stepped into the hall. "She's got the looks that kill."