I Realized

(A/N: I wasn't supposed to update today because of too many homeworks. But I still did. And because one of SHINee's songs has inspired me to make this new chapter.)

*GRAY'S POV*

Then I heard a voice, "Gray! What're you doing there, sulking and stuff! This isn't a place for that!"

"Huh?" Why's that voice familiar? But it couldn't be HER. She's dead.

I lifted my face up and took a quick glance at the person who called me.

I knew it. It isn't her. I'm expecting too much. She's been on my mind for days. I'm starting to mistake every girl's voice as hers. Jeez..

"What're you doing here Daphne?" I asked her.

"Wha- Didn't you mi--"

I cut her off quickly, "No. Now out of my sight. Leave me alone."

I don't have time to see her. I'm not in the mood either. I hate her. I remember that she used me. I've hurt my comrades because of her.

"O'cmon Gray! I've changed! I'm not that evil gal anymore!" she pouted.

I gave her a death glare, "I told you, leave me alone."

Then her expression changed, "Is it because of Lucy's death that you want to be alone?"

"How come you know that she's not here anymore? You weren't at the funeral with us." 

"Well, rumors were spreading. Everyone knew Lucy for years."

So, even Daphne knew Lucy passed away. But yes, she's right. Her death changed me, I want to be alone. I want to stay away from people. Everyone around me always gets harmed.

"Why did she pass away?"

Those words.. Those words made me remember to what a terrible guy I am. Tears started to flow out of my eyes again. Yes I know, I've become a crybaby.

"It's all my fault.. If I was there to rescue her on time, she would've.."

I cannot continue to speak anymore. Instead, I continued crying.

"Gray.."

I'm so pitiful. I don't know what to do anymore. Without her, I'm lost. I don't know where to go.

I wish this is all a nightmare. I want to wake up. Better yet, I want to go back in time.

"Daphne, what I should do?"

"Don't lose hope. Keep wishing that she'll come back."

"Don't lose hope? Daphne, SHE'S DEAD! No matter how many times I wish for her return, she never comes back! I've already given up! It's been days, Daphne! It's been days since she passed away! How do you expect that the dead will come back?! It's impossible right? By magic, they can be revived, but I don't want her to come back by magic! You just don't know what it's like to be alone! You don't know how it feels like that the one precious to you passed away!"

"Gray I--"

"Those 'don't give up' things? What a load of crap! Hope ISN'T real! Wishes don't come true!"

Then a slap landed on my cheek, "Stop your nonsense, would you?! Do you think I'm happy with that attitude? Do you think everyone wanted you to be like that?! You're hurting everyone by those words of yours! You might not know, you're hurting Lucy right now!"

!

I'm hurting Lucy right now? How can that even happen?

"Don't you know that she might be watching over you? She's getting sad by every painful words you blabber!! Haven't you realized that?!"

"Gray! You're turning blind! Look at yourself! Lucy wouldn't be happy by what you have become!"

"Change that attitude of yours Gray. I'm not liking it."

Then she trotted off.

I've never seen Daphne like that. She gets mad of course, but never like that.

But she's right. If Lucy was here, she wouldn't like what I said. She'd even slap me like Daphne did.

I don't know why but, I needed that slap. It woke my senses up. Her words even cleared my mind. Has she really cared for me that much? What am I to her? A friend? Or still an enemy? Or is it something else?

No matter. I have to thank her. I realized that crying doesn't help anything. I have to stop being negative. I'm going back to the Gray that everyone wanted.

"Hey, Daphne." I called out.

She turned around angrily, "What?!"

"Thanks."

"A-Anytime."

Lucy, you wanted that, didn't you? You wanted the old Gray back. I won't be a weakling anymore.

"Yes. Welcome back, Gray. Be like that from now on. Even though I'm not by your side anymore, I'm always watching over you."

...!

Did I just hear her voice?