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Even though visiting hours were over the hospital let me stay with Joella and I was grateful for that. I didn't want to leave her side.

I could tell he parents didn't like the idea of me being here but they didn't say anything to me. Probably didn't want to make a scene if they did say anything. If they did, I wouldn't have left, I would have fought for my right to be here. Despite what's happened between Joella and me,  I still love her, I still want her in my life.

I grabbed the back of her hand and kissed it gently then held it against my cheek.

"Please baby, please be okay. I love you so much. You're the only one for me I promise. I'm so sorry for all those things I've said to you. I know the miscarriage wasn't your fault. and I shouldn't have said them." I sniffed gently rubbing my hand up and down her arm. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you."

"Hey I'm sorry to interrupt." A nurse walked in so I quickly wiped my face off.

"No, it's okay." I sniffed, "I'm guessing it's time for me to leave?" I said not taking my eyes off of Joella.

"Not exactly." She came over and I noticed a small pillow and a blanket in her hands, "These are for you. You're free to stay over night with Miss Durbin."

"Really? Thank you so much." I couldn't help but smile a little.

"You're very welcome. We usually only allow immediate family and married spouses to stay but we can tell how much you truly love her." She gave me a so sympathy smile as she sat the stuff down in the recliner.

"I do, so much. How is she doing? I know it's only been a day but there's hope she'll survive this right? She's got to, I can't lose her."

She looks towards the door then back at me, "I don't know if I'm allowed to talk about her condition to anyone but her parents." She took a deep breath and continued, "Things are looking up slightly, the swelling on her brain has went down some. As you can see her face also isn't swollen like it was early this morning. But the doctor still isn't sure when or if she'll wake up from the coma that she is in."

"But she'll survive? She's still alive so that's a good sign right?"

"It is." She nods, "Look, I've been in this profession for 20 years. We've had patients who looked like they were going to survive but unfortunately didn't. But we've also had patients who looked like they weren't going to make it and did make it through. But in the end the best thing to do is never give up hope. It's all up to." She then stopped and shook her head, "I apologize, I don't know your religion stand point so I shouldn't continue that statement."

I waved it off as I shook my head, I had a feeling what she was going to say, "No, it's okay. You were going to say it was all up to the big man upstairs huh?"

"I was, because us nurses and doctors can only do so much for someone while they are here. But ultimately it's God's will if someone lives or crosses the golden gates. And I'm sorry for talking like that, I shouldn't be."

I sighed as I slightly nodded, "It's okay, you've probably seen so many cases like this so you're only speaking the truth."

"Yes sir. Regardless, don't lose hope okay?" She patted my shoulder, "Good night."

"Good night and thank you."

"You're welcome." She told me then walked out the door.

I sighed running my hands over my face then went back to holding her hand as I leaned forward and laid my head next to hers. I knew she loved listening to me sing so I decided to sing to her hoping maybe she could hear me.

And instead of singing one of my own bands songs, I decided to sing one that I knew she liked. I kissed her cheek then started singing The Cures's LoveSong quietly.

Whenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am home againWhenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am whole againWhenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am young againWhenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am fun againHowever far awayI will always love youHowever long I stayI will always love youWhatever words I sayI will always love youI will always love youFly me to the moonWhenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am free againWhenever I'm alone with youYou make me feel like I am clean againHowever far awayI will always love youHowever long I stayI will always love youWhatever words I sayI will always love youI will always love you

"Sweetie, why don't you sit in the recliner." I opened my eyes to see Eloise Durbin standing next to me with her hand on my back.

I hadn't even realized I had even fallen asleep until she was waking me up.

"I'm sure you'll be way more comfortable." She continued as I sat up slowly.

"I didn't mean to fall asleep like that." I noticed the sun shining through the window, "What time is it?" I asked as I stretched my back out.

"A little after 9."

"Shit, I've got to meet the guys at the studio here in a couple hours." I rubbed my hands over my face as I stood up.

I still needed to go home and take a shower and change yet.

"I'm sure they'd understand if you're a little late given the circumstances." She said as I stood up, "I can tell, despite what's happened between you two that you still love her don't you?"

I nodded, "I do Mrs. Durbin."

"Please, call me Eloise."

"And I'm sorry for what I've done to her. If we weren't arguing maybe she would have been paying more attention. Hell, if I would have gotten to her in time, pulled her back, she wouldn't be laying like that right now." I looked at her, "I just, I wish I would have been able to you know?"

"Matt, honey, it's not your fault. This was an accident. It could have happened whether you two were arguing or not. Stop blaming yourself."

She pulled me into a hug and I hugged her back. Luckily I was able to stay strong this time and no tears escaped. After a few minutes I pulled away realizing I needed to get going.

"I probably should go so I'm not late."

"Okay, I'll let you know if anything changes."

"Thank you."

With that I walked out of her room. I headed home first to take a quick shower before heading to the studios.