Chapter 9: Aquarium

Hayoon's days were filled to the brim—practices, interviews, late-night rehearsals, and brief moments of rest snatched between it all. Yet, no matter how busy she kept herself, she couldn't escape the thoughts of him. Ni-ki had crept into her mind like a song she couldn't stop humming, an unshakable presence that lingered in the quiet corners of her heart.

She didn't want to feel this way.

It was reckless, she told herself, selfish even, to harbor such feelings when her career was barely beginning. But no matter how many times she reminded herself of her priorities, her thoughts always seemed to wander back to him.

It started small—fleeting memories of their conversations or the way he had smiled at her during the café outing. Then, it grew. She began replaying his words in her mind, his laughter, the way his voice softened when he spoke to her.

The worst part was the anticipation. Every time her phone buzzed, her heart leapt, only to sink when it wasn't him. And when it was him—when the screen lit up with his name—her entire world seemed to pause.

Ni-ki: How was practice today?

She stared at the message, her heart racing. It wasn't an unusual question; he'd asked her similar things before. But it felt different now, more charged, as though every word carried an unspoken weight.

Hayoon: Tiring, but we're getting there. How about you?

Her fingers hovered over the send button, debating whether she sounded too casual. She erased it, retyped it, and finally hit send with a sigh.

The wait for his response was torturous, even though she knew he was likely busy. She paced her room, her mind a whirlwind of emotions she couldn't quite name.

When his reply finally came, she couldn't help the smile that spread across her face.

Ni-ki: Same here. But I can't wait to see your group's stage again. You always amaze me.

Her cheeks flushed, and she quickly locked her phone, as if hiding the message from herself would somehow keep her feelings at bay.

The next morning, Hayoon woke up feeling like she had hardly slept. The rush of adrenaline she'd felt the night before hadn't subsided, and her mind was still filled with thoughts of him. She scolded herself as she got ready, tying her hair back and slipping on her training clothes.

"Focus, Hayoon," she whispered to her reflection. "This isn't the time for distractions."

But it was easier said than done.

At the practice room, her members noticed her distracted state almost immediately.

"Hayoon, you're spacing out again," Minseo teased, nudging her lightly. "What's got you so preoccupied these days?"

"Nothing," Hayoon said quickly, shaking her head.

Jiwon raised an eyebrow, her leader instincts kicking in. "You've been like this for a while. If something's bothering you, you can tell us."

"I'm fine," Hayoon insisted, forcing a smile. "Just tired, that's all."

The girls exchanged glances but didn't push further, though Minseo shot her a playful wink that made Hayoon's cheeks heat up.

Throughout the day, Hayoon tried to focus on their routines, but her mind kept drifting. She replayed their conversations in her head, wondering if he thought about her as much as she thought about him.

This has to stop, she told herself, frustrated with her inability to control her emotions. You can't like him. You're idols. It's impossible.

But even as she scolded herself, her heart ached with the weight of her feelings.

That evening, as she lay in bed scrolling mindlessly through her phone, another message from Ni-ki popped up.

Ni-ki: Are you awake?

Her heart raced, and she quickly typed back.

Hayoon: Yeah, what's up?

His reply came almost instantly.

Ni-ki: Just wanted to check in. You seemed quiet last time we talked.

Hayoon bit her lip, her chest tightening. How was it possible that he noticed her so much?

Hayoon: I'm okay, just busy. Thanks for checking in.

Ni-ki: Always. Let me know if you ever need to talk, okay?

Her fingers hovered over the keyboard, her emotions swirling. She wanted to tell him everything—to let him know how much his words meant to her, how much he had been on her mind. But she couldn't. She shouldn't.

Hayoon: I will. Thank you.

She set her phone down, staring at the ceiling as her thoughts spiraled.

Days turned into weeks, and her feelings only grew stronger, no matter how hard she tried to suppress them. Every time she saw him backstage or exchanged texts with him, her heart betrayed her, pounding loudly in her chest.

But with each passing day, she also grew more certain that these feelings could never be. The weight of their careers, their responsibilities, and the unspoken rules of the industry loomed too large between them.

Yet, in the quiet moments, when the world was still and her heart felt heavy, she allowed herself to think of him—to imagine a world where they weren't bound by expectations and rules, where she could tell him how much he meant to her without fear of the consequences.

It was a bittersweet thought, one she clung to even as she tried to let it go.

The evening was quiet, the kind of stillness that allowed thoughts to grow loud in the mind. Hayoon sat by the window of her dorm room, her legs pulled up to her chest as she stared out at the city lights. Her phone sat on the desk nearby, buzzing softly with notifications she ignored. Her heart felt heavy, weighed down by the conflicting emotions she could no longer suppress.

She liked Ni-ki—more than liked him—but every part of her screamed that it wasn't possible. She had spent days, weeks, trying to convince herself that her feelings were fleeting, but it was a losing battle. The more she pushed him away in her mind, the closer he seemed to come.

As if on cue, her phone buzzed again.

Ni-ki: Hey. Do you want to go for a walk?

Her heart skipped a beat. She stared at the message, the words blurring slightly as her thoughts tangled. She shouldn't. She knew she shouldn't.

Hayoon: I don't think I can. It's late, and we have schedules tomorrow.

Her fingers trembled slightly as she sent the message, and almost immediately, she regretted it.

A few seconds later, his reply came:

Ni-ki: I thought you might say that. But it's not too late. Just for a little while? I promise it'll be worth it.

She hesitated, staring at the screen. Her mind told her to say no again, but her heart was screaming at her to go. She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath before typing her reply.

Hayoon: ...Okay. Where should I meet you?

They met outside her dorm building, the air cool and crisp as she stepped out into the quiet street. Ni-ki was already waiting, his hands tucked into the pockets of his hoodie. When he saw her, a small smile tugged at his lips.

"You came," he said softly, his voice warm and familiar.

Hayoon nodded, her cheeks flushing. "I didn't want to, but... here I am."

He chuckled, his gaze soft as he looked at her. "I knew you'd say yes."

They walked in comfortable silence for a while, the city glowing softly around them. Hayoon wasn't sure where they were going, but Ni-ki seemed to have a destination in mind.

"Where are we going?" she finally asked, her voice breaking the quiet.

"It's a surprise," he said, glancing at her with a playful glint in his eyes.

After a short bus ride, they arrived at an aquarium. The building stood tall and glowing, the lights reflecting off the glass in shimmering waves. Hayoon's eyes widened as she took it in.

"How did you know I love aquariums?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"You mentioned it once, a long time ago," Ni-ki said, his expression softening. "I remembered."

Her heart fluttered at his words, and she felt a warmth spread through her chest.

Inside, the world felt different, quieter, as though they had stepped into a dream. The soft glow of the tanks illuminated their faces as they wandered through the exhibits, the vibrant colors of the fish casting shadows on the walls.

Hayoon found herself relaxing, the tension she had been carrying for weeks slowly melting away. Ni-ki walked beside her, his presence steady and reassuring.

"This is amazing," Hayoon whispered, her voice barely audible in the tranquil stillness of the aquarium.

They strolled through the dimly lit corridors, the soft blue glow of the tanks painting their faces in ethereal light. Schools of fish darted around coral reefs, their scales shimmering like liquid gold. Hayoon felt a sense of peace she hadn't experienced in weeks, her worries momentarily fading as she lost herself in the beauty of the underwater world.

Ni-ki walked beside her in silence, his hands tucked into the pockets of his hoodie. She stole glances at him every now and then, noticing how the soft light reflected in his dark eyes, giving him an almost otherworldly aura.

When they reached the jellyfish exhibit, Hayoon stopped in her tracks, her breath catching in her throat. The tank stretched high above them, filled with graceful creatures that floated like living pieces of art. The jellyfish drifted in slow, hypnotic motions, their translucent bodies glowing softly in shades of pink, blue, and gold.

"They're my favorite," Hayoon said quietly, her voice filled with awe.

"I remember you saying that," Ni-ki replied, his gaze fixed on her rather than the tank.

Hayoon turned to look at him, her brows furrowing slightly. "You remember so many little things I've said," she murmured.

"Of course I do." His voice was soft, yet there was a weight to it that made her chest tighten.

They stood there for a moment, the glow of the jellyfish casting shifting patterns of light on their faces. Hayoon felt a strange mix of peace and nervousness, her heartbeat quickening as Ni-ki shifted closer.

"Hayoon," he began, his voice low and steady.

She turned to him fully, her heart pounding. "Yes?"

He hesitated, his eyes searching hers as though trying to find the right words. Then, in a voice that was both tender and unwavering, he said, "I like you."

Hayoon froze, her breath catching. The words hung in the air between them, delicate and fragile, yet impossibly heavy.

Her gaze dropped to the floor, her mind racing. "Ni-ki..." she began, her voice trembling. "You know we can't..."

"I know," he said quickly, cutting her off. "I know it's not allowed, and I know it's complicated. But I couldn't keep it to myself anymore. I like you, Hayoon. More than I should."

Her chest tightened as she looked back up at him, her emotions swirling in a chaotic storm. She had felt this moment coming, but hearing the words out loud made it all too real.

"I feel the same," she admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. "But we're idols, Ni-ki. We're not supposed to..."

"I don't care about the rules," he said, his tone firm. "I care about you. And if we're careful—if we keep it just between us—then maybe we can make it work."

Hayoon felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. Part of her wanted to say yes, to let herself be swept away by the emotions she had been fighting for so long. But another part of her was terrified—terrified of what it would mean for both of them if they were caught, of the consequences that could ripple through their careers.

"Ni-ki," she said, her voice breaking. "This is dangerous. For both of us."

He reached out, his hand brushing against hers. The warmth of his touch sent a shiver down her spine. "I'm willing to take the risk," he said softly. "Are you?"

Hayoon looked at him, her heart pounding. In his eyes, she saw a mix of determination and vulnerability, a quiet plea that tugged at her soul.

The jellyfish floated serenely behind them, their movements slow and graceful, as though the world itself were holding its breath.

After a long pause, Hayoon nodded, a tear slipping down her cheek. "Okay," she whispered. "But we have to be careful. No one can know."

A smile broke across Ni-ki's face, his relief evident. "I promise," he said, his voice full of quiet sincerity.

For the first time in weeks, Hayoon felt a sense of peace. It wasn't perfect—it wasn't even safe—but it was real. And for now, that was enough.

As they stood together in the soft glow of the jellyfish tank, Hayoon allowed herself to smile, her hand slipping into Ni-ki's. It was the beginning of something fragile and uncertain, but for the first time, she didn't feel so alone.