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raelyn billie and i have been hanging out a little too much.

i really enjoy being around her. she's funny and sweet but can be kinda annoying sometimes.

i just find it so weird how we clicked instantly.

that shit never really happens when i meet someone new.

i also might be in denial about something. i don't wanna admit it nor do i want it to be true. it's a weird feeling in me and i hate it.

do i like her?

maybe.

maybe just a little bit... it's weird.

i don't wanna tell anyone though because they're gonna be like 'omg, you're finally falling for someone!'. they're gonna say things like that to me and i don't want that.

as much as i hang out with billie, my friends have been growing kinda suspicious of me.

they always ask why i'm with her all the time and i just say cause we're friends.

in which is true, but i don't wanna admit that i kinda like her.

i'm hoping it goes away though because i cannot date someone.

i CANNOT

there's a party later today and billies going with her friends. maeve, tycee, dante and zeke are going too, so i figured that i should go.

i'm getting ready to go pick up mae and ty.

they have their own cars but i just like to drive. i picked up ty first cause she lives closer and then maeve.

"is maddy not coming?" tycee asked me.

"nope" i shook my head. "she's with her boyfriend"

"that guy never lets her go out" maeve made a face.

"i know right!" i agreed with her. "i asked her and she was like 'sergio doesn't want me to go' and i'm just like... you're really gonna let a man control you like that?"

"i feel bad for her" ty frowned.

"me too but she's fucking stupid" i shrugged.

after driving for what felt like forever, we finally made it to the party. the three of us got out and walked up to the front door.

when i knocked on it, dante and some other dude opened the door and made a face.

"we thought you were the pizza guy" he sucked his teeth while letting us inside. "but it was just you guys"

"fuck off" maeve pushed his shoulder playfully.

dante and mae began messing around while we walked to the living room. the house was pretty big and there were a few people here.

i think it's more of a laid back kind of party.

when we entered the living room, i saw a couple people sitting on the couches. i ended up seeing billie with some girl sitting on top of her.

that got me a bit jealous.

"sit down" the same guy that was with dante told us. "we have a shit done of drinks and food on the way"

there wasn't any space on the other couches expect the one billie was on. i sat down next to her with tycee.

this feels like deja vu

the girl was still sitting on billies lap. i thought she would like push her off or some shit when she saw me but she didn't.

"hey" billie smiled at me.

"hey" i said dryly.

billie made a face at me and i turned back to tycee. "hey drew" i heard her say. "i'm gonna go to the restroom real quick"

"okay" the girl who i'm guessing her name is drew said while getting off of billie.

i felt my phone vibrate in my pocket so i checked to see what it was. 

pirate: why are you mad?

me: i'm not

pirate: i said hey to youand u just said it back like ur mad did i do something?

me: nope 🙂

pirate: mckay are you jealous bc that girl was sitting on my lap?

me: no lol

pirate: yeah you are she's my best friendher name is drew

me: ok

pirate: i wanted you guys to meet pls don't be upset

me: i'm not

pirate: you're literally giving me two word responses!ofc u are mad when i'm done pissing you better not be upset

me: k

pirate: 🙄

i left her on read and put my attention back on tycee. maeve was sitting was dante and zeke was sitting next to some girl.

that girl looks familiar though.

"calliope?" i looked at her.

"raelyn?" she smiled. "hey!"

"hi" i giggled. "i didn't know you were gonna be here"

"juniors my brother" calliope pointed at the guy next to dante. "he wanted to have a kickback or whatever you wanna call it"

"you live pretty far though" i told her.

"yeah" she sighed. "i moved into my moms place. i come over here sometimes, this is my dads house"

"oh" i made a face. "sorry calliope..."

"call me callie please" she giggled.

"alright" i nodded my head and smacked ty on the leg cause she was looking at her with a bitch face. "this is tycee, my best friend. she's nice i promise"

"hi" callie waved at her.

"hey" tycee nodded.

i saw billie in the corner of my eye when she sat down. she smacked my leg and i turned to her.

"ow!" i made a face. "what the hell was that for?"

"stop being a bitch" she made a fake angry face at me.

i rolled my eyes and giggled. "fine" i mumbled while scooting closer to her so our legs were touching.

"drew!" billie nudged her friends arms.

"hmm?" she turned to billie.

"i want you to meet raelyn" she told her while wrapping an arm around me.

"oh" drew smirked when she looked at me. "is this the girl you've been telling me ab-"

billie elbowed her in the ribs. "shut the fuck up" she gritted out through her teeth while making a face. "this is raelyn though"

"hey" drew smiled.

"hi" i smiled back. "you're really pretty"

"thank you!" she placed a hand over her chest. "you are too"

"okay stop flirting with her" billie told drew while bringing me closer to her.

her friend let out a small giggle and went back to talking with some other girl.

i looked over at maeve and she had the biggest smirk on her face. i smiled at her and mouthed 'stop' because i know what she's thinking.

"pizzas here!" junior set down two boxes of pizza on the coffee table where we all were.

everyone grabbed a slice and ate while they continued their conversations.

"can i have a bite of your pizza" billie asked me with a mouthful.

"we literally have the same-" i told her.

she ended up biting half of my pizza. "you're right" she laughed. "it is the same"

"are you dumb?" i giggled at her.

"a little, yeah" billie smiled while leaning her head onto my shoulder.

i put my leg over her knee and left it there. we all finished eating our pizza. junior and dante cleaned up and came back with a bunch of liquor and shot glasses.

"have yall played do or drink?" junior asked everyone.

a few people said yes and a few said no.

he then explained the game which was basically do the dare on the card or take shots or whatever. the whole point is to try not to blackout and win.

"alright i'll go first" dante said and grabbed a card from the deck. "let the group choose three random things from the refrigerator and mix them together... eat it or drink it or take a shot"

junior, zeke, and maeve got up from their spot and ran to the kitchen. they came back with a few things. dante has a regretful look on his face.

"we got pickle juice, mayo, and sardines" maeve told him while putting all the things inside a cup.

"oh hell nah" dante shook his head. "fuck!"

"you don't wanna be the first person to take a shot, do you?" tycee teased him.

dante let out a sigh and began chugging the mixture of random things down.

once he finished he loudly gagged and ran to the bathroom. maeve followed behind him to make sure he was okay.

"poor him" callie laughed while looking at her brother. "it's your turn"

junior pulled out a card and read it, "confess which players dad you think is the hottest or drink three times"

everyone bursted out laughing when he finished reading.

"i haven't seen any of y'all's dads" junior laughed.

"then you drink three times" zeke told him.

junior let out a huff and took three shots. he ended up taking his shirt off for some reason when he did.

callie was next and she got a card that said to blind fold yourself and have someone spin you around and walk until you bump into something/someone and make out with it/them or take a shot.

tycee spun her around and let her go.

callie bumped into a wall and let out a groan. "now i have to make out with it!" she laughed as she began making out with the wall.

after she finished she sat back down.

"shave an eyebrow. do this, take two shots or quit playing" tycee read when she pulled a card. "oh fuck no, pass me the bottle"

everyone let out a laugh while she took two shots.

it was my turn so i grabbed a card from the deck and read it aloud, "place your hand on the crotch of the person to your right for one round. both of you must do this, take two shots or quit playing"

i looked over at billie and gave her a look.

everyone around us let out a 'woah' when i placed my hand on her crotch.

billie shifted in her spot while grabbing my wrist. she stuck my hand in her sweats and everyone began smirking and letting out exited 'oohs'.

"your turn billie" junior told her.

she leaned over, still with my hand in her sweats right on her dick, and got a card.

"venmo request your ex $100 and label it 'for the trauma you inflicted', do this or drink three times" billie read from the card. "shit, i need me my money for therapy!"

everyone laughed at her joke while she did the dare.

we played the game for almost two hours. dante and maeve came back after the first round and they ended up getting fucked up.

well all of us got fucked up.

i ended up making out with billie in front of everyone and i don't think that was a good. they're all asking us some dumb questions.

"so are you and billie something?" maeve wiggled her eyebrows at us.

"no, we're just friends" i giggled while i squished billies face.

"yeah right!" zeke cackled. "just friends my ass! we've never seen you act like this with someone before"

"we're friends" billie laughed at him. "bestie vibes only"

"what she said" i nodded while smiling.

another hour has passed, and have people started leaving. maeve and tycee said they were leaving with ezekiel when i asked them.

"did you drive here?" i asked billie while picking my head up from her shoulder.

"no, drew brought me here" she told me. "why?"

"come with me" i poked her side.

billie nodded her head and told her friend she was leaving with me. "okay let's go" she patted my thigh while getting up.

she held her hand out for me and i grabbed it.

"bye guys" i waved at everybody.

"where y'all going?" dante smirked at me.

"none of your business!" billie shouted while we walked out the door.

we giggled all the way to my car.

"hey, look at me" billie said after i started my car.

"what's u-" i looked up and she cut me off my giving me a peck on the lips. "what was that for?"

"i just felt like it" she fluttered her eyelashes at me.

i let out a small giggle and began driving back to myplace. it was almost one o'clock at night, so the streets were pretty empty.

plus, the drive it's gonna take like thirty minutes because this dude lives pretty far from me.

i connected my phone and put on my music. some by steve lacy started playing through the car speakers.

i bopped my head to the beat and pointed at billie.

"babyyy" i sang while reaching over to touch her face. "i want some of your love"

i rolled down the windows and danced along to the song with billie. she grabbed my hand and swung it back and forth.

"oh!" billie let go of my hand and patted my arm repeatedly. "pull over!"

"why?" i giggled while lowering down the volume.

"cones!" she exclaimed excitedly. "pull over!"

i pulled over on the side and billie got out my car. she motioned for me to come out with her and i did. she grabbed my hand and lead me to the middle of the empty street.

"bitch if you're tryna kill me just tell me" i made a face.

"if i was, i would've already killed you" billie told me while walking over to some traffic cones.

she grabbed one and put it over her head.

"what are you doing?" i laughed while helping her not fall over with it.

"put one on and were gonna fight" she giggled.

i picked one up and it was unexpectedly heavy. i put it over my head and began moving my head around to hit billie with it.

we fought in the middle of the street for a good ten minutes until my traffic cone fell off my head.

"i win!" billie shouted happily while she took hers off.

"yeah yeah whatever" i giggled as i walked up to her.

she placed her hands on my waist and pulled me in. we both stared into each others eyes, she gave me a small dimpled smile and leaned in.

billie pressed her lips against mine and pulled away.

"i think you're very pretty mckay" she told me while biting her lip shyly.

"you've already told me this pirate" i giggled while we walked back to my car hand in hand.

"i guess i'll tell you again" billie chuckled as we entered my car.

i started it and turned to look at her. she was already staring at me. the streetlights from outside made her blue eyes twinkle in the dark.

billie smiled at me and turned the other way.

there are things we don't say.

but we both feel it...