You're Not A Monster

Laughter could be heard on the moving staircase as two pairs of legs staggered up them. Granger had the bottle of fire whiskey in one hand and clung to his dress shirt with the other. As they continued their ascent he kept one arm firmly around her waist as the other clutched the railing, trying to keep them both from toppling over.

"Di' you see 'is face Malfoy? Did you see it!?" She asked merrily, at the expense of one miffed Peeves who had had been an unfortunate victim of a drunken prank.

"Yeah. I did. Gave'em a taste of 'is own medicine." Draco chuckled, his arm never leaving from around her. He'd found out three floors ago that she was no longer capable of walking very far on her own. She'd demonstrated this by falling on her arse in the bathroom. He'd rushed in when he'd heard a splash and couldn't stop laughing when he saw she'd fallen into the bath. He helped her get out, laughing and soaking both of them in the process. He was just glad Moaning Myrtle was nowhere to be found. "You come up with the best pranks, Granger."

"Well, they don't call me the brightest witch of our age for nothing." She insisted, throwing her head back and swaying almost to the point of falling over.

He smirked and pulled her back into him. "Conceited much?"

She shook her head. "Oh shut it, Malfoy."

"Are you always so bossy?" He asked, stopping for a moment to wait for the staircase to connect to their next point.

"Are you always so-" Her words were cut off as she lost her footing and almost fell off the top of the stairs.

He yanked her arm back quickly, pulling her into his chest. "Watch out you klutz! That's a long way and you're not invincible, you know."

"Really, Malfoy, you're always so serious." She looked up at his face, which was frowning, and poked the crease it made on his forehead. "I bet you even scowl in your sleep." He snorted at that as she continued, "You should try to smile more. You'll get wrinkles."

He swatted her hand away. "You should learn how to walk. Or next time I'll just let you plummet to your death"

She gasped. "You wouldn't!"

"I would." He insisted in jest.

"A prat as always." She said with a shake of her head as they began climbing another set of stairs.

"Better a prat than the golden boy's walking essay dispenser." Yes, he knew very well that she'd helped Potter and Weasely. There was no way in hell the redhead could have gotten some of those marks.

"Touche." She looked over at him, her eyes big and innocent. "I still think you look better when you smile, though. You look nicer somehow."

He was rendered speechless as they continued towards her dorm. They heard Peeves wailing somewhere down the stairs and they both glanced at each other, laughter erupting between them.

"Can we take a rest?" She choked between breaths.

He nodded and when they reached the seventh-floor landing they left the staircase and slumped down against a nearby wall, Hermione discarding her jacket and Draco tossing it aside. She was still laughing and he couldn't stop smiling. He'd never seen Granger like this. She'd never laughed this hard near him. Shit, he'd never laughed this hard period. He was glad he didn't go back to his room to get loaded by himself.

She wiped the tears of mirth from her eyes and inhaled deeply, leaning her head on his shoulder. He found that he didn't really mind. "Thanks, Malfoy. I haven't had this much fun in a long time, if you can believe that."

"I've never really had this much fun," Draco admitted, prying the bottle from her hand and taking another swig. Three-quarters of the way gone. He could already tell it was doing its job. He was a bit intoxicated, and she most certainly was, but he didn't want to leave quite yet. He was enjoying his present company, despite their former animosity.

Hermione looked up at him, her face doubtful. "Truly?"

He nodded. "Truly."

A brow raised, she inquired,"I thought you were the biggest party animal in Slytherin?"

He laughed dryly. "Yes, well, it seems my reputation proceeds me, but I hate to inform you that most of those stories are quite exaggerated."

"Really? So you didn't get drunk the night of the Yule Ball and ask Tracy Davis and Pansy Parkinson to join you in a threesome?"

His mouth popped open in shock. "Who the hell was saying that?!" He looked genuinely embarrassed and Hermione laughed.

"That really didn't answer my question, Malfoy."

His shoulders slumped in defeat. "Alright, Granger. I'll sate your damn curiosity." She leaned closer, a grin on her face as she urged him on. "No, I did not ask Tracy Davis and Pansy Parkinson for a threesome." He noted that she looked almost disappointed by the admittance. "It was Pansy and Millicent Bulstrode," he added quietly, looking skyward.

She obviously couldn't contain her glee, because as soon as the words left his mouth she broke out laughing again. "You're joking!"

"I wish I was." He pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Did they agree?"

"What!? No! We were thirteen or fourteen for Merlin's sake. And I don't think Milly even knew what I was asking to begin with." He shook his head. "But look, I was a randy boy with a couple of stolen bottles of my father's finest wine and pretty girls in dresses surrounding me. I'm surprised I didn't do anything more embarrassing."

"How did you even manage to get away with being sloshed? I thought McGonagall was going to have a fit when she caught the twins with a flask."

"Honestly, I have no idea. A lot was going on at the time."

"Hmmm, yes. You're certainly right about that. That night didn't end much better for me either."

"I thought you had that heartthrob Krum at your disposal?"

She sighed dramatically. "Don't even get me started on Viktor. I thought I was going to strangle Ron."

"Are you always this violent? Who knew!" He teased. "Though with friends like Weasley it would be hard not to be."

"He's not that bad." She replied, defending her friend. "Not like yours are any better."

"Well, I can't say that your wrong. A few are quite lacking in the intelligence department."

"Who, your bodyguards?"

He laughed. "Bodyguards? You mean Greg and Vincent," his mouth fell a bit with the thought of his deceased friend. "They weren't really my bodyguards, but I suppose they qualify as henchmen of sorts."

"How did you even become friends? Do all the pureblood families get together for playdates or what?"

"I should have known you'd have no filter. You do love asking questions. "He passed the bottle to her.

"I'm just curious. I've always been the inquisitive type." She took a swig. "A'right then, fine. You can ask me anything," she said handing it back to him. "I promise to answer honestly, and then it's my turn."

"Oh, twenty questions, my favorite!" He grinned. "Is it the X-rated version?"

She smacked him on the arm, affronted. "Come on, don't make it dirty."

His grin seemed to only widen."But it's so much more entertaining. Watching you get flustered brings me such joy."

She cut her eyes at him and he yielded. "Ok, fine. We'll be boring. Favorite food?"

She raised one brow in response.

"What, it's not sexual. Well, unless we're talking about which food is your favorite to eat off someone's body." She sat, mouth agape and cheeks ablaze. He rolled his eyes. What did she want from him? "Just answer the question." he urged.

"My mums Red Velvet Cake."

"What's that?"

"You know...it's a cake. It's chocolate with red food coloring and I think it has cream cheese icing. She always made it for me on my birthday back home."

He laughed out loud.

"Hey, that's not a bad answer. Cakes are good!"

"No, sorry, it's not that. I just forgot for a second that you were muggle-bor..." His laughter abruptly stopped and he turned slowly, waiting for her to say something.

Her eyes weren't cold, just confused and a little glazed over from the alcohol in her system. "'How could you forget? You've only called me Mudblood every year since meeting me."

"Just...leave it for tonight will you?" He wanted to change the subject quickly. "Go on ask me something."

She frowned but placed a hand to her chin in thought. "Ok then, favorite game?"

"Quidditch." He answered immediately.

Her eyes rolled dramatically. "I should have known."

"Yeah, you'd think after all these years you'd know how much I like to try to beat Potter at his best game."

"Oooh, am I hearing things? Did you just admit that Harry is a better Seeker than you? Harry would love to hear that."

He scoffed, "I wouldn't go as far to say I'm admitting defeat. I'm just conceding that he won the battle. If I would ever square off against him again, I'd win the war."

"Hmmm. I think someone is a little conceited." She singsonged.

"I try." He took a drink and smiled. "Ok. Yes! I've got a good one for you. Why Weasel and not Potter?" He honestly could not fathom someone as witty as Granger to end up with a gormless arse like Weasley.

She frowned at his continuous use of his nickname for the red head. "Well it's true I did have a crush on Harry first and second year, but then I started really liking Ron." She paused. "I don't know when it happened but suddenly I realized I wanted to be near him. He made me laugh, stood up for me. Of course, I love Harry, but he's more like a brother."

"I still don't get it." He didn't think Ron was that great of a bloke himself.

"You don't get to choose who you love, Malfoy."

"That's not true." In his circle, your parents chose for you. You'd really get no say in the matter.

"Why's that? Did you get your heart broken?" He didn't answer her, as he'd never even come close to that. "Haven't you ever been in love?"

"No."

"Really?" she said, shocked. "What 'bout Pansy?"

"Hah, don't make me laugh, Granger. I was only with her because she's a pureblood, and as I said earlier, I was randy. Love had nothing to do with it."

"Wow, I'd just always thought- Well, if you say so."

Suddenly her face went a bit white and she clutched her head in her hands."You alright?"

"Yeah, just a bit dizzy." she admitted, taking a deep breath.

He stretched out his legs and offered her his lap.

She gave him a look that said no-way-in-hell, so he grabbed her jacket and bundled it up. "Better?"

She still looked uncertain but as the hall started to spin she moved to lay her head in his lap while her back rested on the floor. She stared up at him for a moment, her eyes wandering over his face. She thought he looked rather handsome right now, but shook the thought out of her mind. That must be her drunk self-thinking. When he didn't say anything she broke the silence. "Aren't you going to ask me something?"

"I'm trying to think of another good one." He replied, trying hard not to admit that he was just staring at her chest and wondering why he'd allowed her to lay her head in his lap. That could get awkward later. Oh well. "Ah...The worst thing you got a detention for.."

"That would be calling Umbridge a hag, and then hiding all her kitty plates throughout Hogwarts." she replied laughing.

He looked astonished. "That was you!"

She giggled again, prying the almost empty bottle from his hand and leaning up enough to take another swig.

"Wouldn't have thought."

"That I could be a trouble-maker? Well, I assure you Mr. Malfoy. I can be just as troublesome as Harry. I jus' don't do it all the time...besides..you were there, right? Being a smug bastard and all."

"Yes, yes I get it. I was an arse."

She raised her knees and looked up at him again. He didn't look at her face, she noticed. His eyes were traveling down south. "Still are."

His eyes shot back to hers. "I ought to thump you."

"I wouldn't advise that. I can pack a good punch." She demonstrated by punching him lightly in the jaw.

He rubbed the side of his face. "Hmm yes. That's true. "

"Oh yeah, I hit you for real third-year didn't I?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You would say that. I'm pretty sure you ran away crying, that's why you don't want to admit it." She saw him roll his eyes and decided to move along to the next question. "A'right fine. How'd you get your name?"

"Well, that's an odd one."

"Just answer it." Her eyes left his face and stared at the ceiling. "I've always been rather curious."

He noticed she wasn't looking at him, and took the opportunity to study her features. Her skin sort of glowed in the dim light. "My mum's side of the family always names their kids after stars and constellations. "

"Ah, I can't believe I never put it together before. "Sirius, Regulus, Andromeda, Draco." When she said his name a shiver went up his spine. He chose to ignore it. "The dragon constellation."

"Yeah, it's a rather strange tradition, don't you think?"

"I don't know. I think it's kind of beautiful, to be honest. Being named after the stars."

She looked rather happy at the thought. He found himself leaning forward, wanting to get a closer look at her big brown eyes that seemed to have a spark in them. She turned her head and he backed up, clearing his throat. " Hmm, Biggest triumph?"

He expected her to say defeating Voldemort. He was wrong. "Getting nine Oustanding on my O.W.L.S."

"You've got to be joking?"

"I'm not."She insisted. "I'll have you know I take my schooling very seriously."

Yes, that he knew. "I am aware of your intellectual prowess, Granger. I just don't see how that was your biggest triumph."

She moved off his lap and stared at him. "Well, I thought for sure I would fail them all. So yes. I find it rather triumphant." She grinned, taking a drink from the bottle for the last time. She held it out to him.

He took it, shaking his head "You are, by far, the strangest witch I know."

"I'll take that as a compliment, thank you." She replied nudging him.

"I can't even get a good insult on you tonight." He sighed. "To think a good grade outweighed defeating the Dark Lord...It's humorous."

"But that's just it. You just assumed you already knew my answer. Anyone can assume things. I assume things about you."

He swallowed down the remaining amber liquid. "Fine, fine. Assume away." he chuckled.

"Alright then. Is your biggest regret being a Death Eater?"

It was an honest question, not one she'd purposely set him up for. So when his mouth twitched, she knew she'd probably gone a step too far. She wasn't prepared for this. Not even a little bit. Draco's face, which had up to this moment been smiling and rosy with booze, crumpled and slowly drained of its color. She immediately felt guilty. She obviously didn't have a filter right then. She slowly reached out and put a gentle hand on his arm. "I'm...I'm sorry...I shouldn't have...that was kind of insensitive of me...You really don't have to answer that."

He looked hard at the floor for a moment. It wasn't like he hadn't thought about this exact thing a million times before tonight. He shouldn't have been surprised that it had gotten brought up. Granger was always curious and with her lowered inhibitions she probably just spouted off whatever came to her mind. He should just stop this right now, take her up on it. If they hadn't been drinking he wouldn't even be considering telling her his biggest regret, but as it were, he wanted badly to get it off his chest. She seemed the type that could keep a secret if it was important. "No, I want to answer," he finally said. "If you want to hear it." Hopefully, he didn't regret this later.

Hermione thought for a moment. Did she want to hear it? What Draco Malfoy, former Death Eater's, biggest regret was? She hadn't meant to turn their night of fun into such a serious affair. She hadn't meant to make him remember things he most likely didn't want to. But now that the mood was ruined, She found herself whispering, "I'll listen."

He wasn't looking at her, but he took a shaky breath. "It's true I regret it, but it was out of my hands. I never wanted to be a Death Eater. Sure, I played it up that I did, but only to keep myself alive. Deep inside it was just a lie. It had always been a lie. All the arrogance and vanity I held was just to cover up what I really felt." He chanced a glance, she was staring intently at him, it was almost suffocating, but he continued.

"I know that I was a nasty little shite so I won't make excuses for what I did back then. The decision to antagonize you and Potter was all mine. I chose to be nasty. My ideologies, on the other hand," He sighed deeply. This was harder than he even thought it would be. "Those I didn't choose. I didn't know anything else. When I was younger I justified my behavior because I, and everyone one around me, was a pureblood. I felt superior. I should be able to get away with things because we were better than other wizards. I gladly followed after my father, mimicking what he told me time and time again. Even when I was too young to truly understand it." He angled his body more towards her. "I know you won't understand but traditions and prejudice are engrained in us from the time we're born. From the day my magic surfaced, until recently, I've been a walking, talking puppet, with my father above me, pulling the strings."

She was still looking intently at him and he felt lightheaded as he spoke. He never talked about his father. To anyone. Ever. He stood, unable to sit still any longer, and began pacing in front of her. "Honestly, I did buy into everything he said. He was my father, why would I question him? Then, sometime around third year, things started changing. It was no longer harmless taunting andbelittling the blood traitors and mudbloods. It was no longer about forcing them out. It was about eradicating them." At this, he heard her sharp intake of breath. "Now, sabotaging I could get behind. I would have gladly come up with plans to get people expelled, or fired and such, but as soon as his talks turned more sinister in nature I started questioning myself, and everything I believed in. I wasn't comfortable with the thought of killing anyone. It wasn't in me. I knew it was wrong, that he was wrong, so I tried to stay out of it. But sometimes I heard things."

"I don't know if you recall, Granger," He leaned against the wall again, closing his eyes. " But the night of the Quidditch World Cup I warned you." She made a noise but he raised his hand to silence her. "No, it wasn't premeditated or anything like that. It's just...I saw you, Potter, and Weasely and I didn't...I didn't want you to run into them. I had no idea what their plans were but it couldn't have been pretty. I still hated you all but I didn't wish you dead. I had honestly thought that their little power trip wouldn't last. It was a fruitless endeavor and I thought it would fizzle out when they realized using Unforgivables and killing muggles-borns would land them in Azkaban. My father had gotten out of it once, how could he possibly think it was a good idea? Obviously, I couldn't have been more wrong."

"I didn't believe it really," He admitted, opening his eyes once more." about, ...Voldemort. At first, I thought Potter was lying. But then he literally showed up at our front door. To say I was scared would be the understatement of the century. I was completely terrified. After my father's cock up at The Ministry, I didn't have my family's status as protection anymore. My father had fallen out of favor with him. So now it was up to me to..to.." He struggled. "I was to become his lackey, his scapegoat. To make sure we were in good standing with him. As an impressional youth, I had always pictured Death Eaters as dark and glamorous but when it was my turn to become one, I knew I had been mistaken. I didn't want to be a part of it at all....but I couldn't just turn tail and run away...my mum....my mum ... I couldn't leave her. I also knew I wouldn't last long on my own, so I stayed. Then my father forced me to join them. He needed to get back in the Dark Lords good graces." He absentmindedly touched his right arm. "I was "gifted" with the Dark Mark and told to kill...told to kill Dumbledore." Pain flashed in his eyes but he continued on. " I really didn't want to do it. I tried round about ways to get it done and it almost cost two innocent people their lives. I couldn't....it just ate me up....and, in the end, ...well you know what happened." He made a choking noise like he was struggling with himself. "But none of that was my biggest regret. It's worse. So much worse."

Hermione felt sick to her stomach. She'd been enthralled by his story and had quickly realized that she was probably the first person he had told any of this too. She could tell by the way he struggled, the way he got stuck on words and moved about in a crazed manner, the empty bottle being tossed back and forth anxiously. She knew what he was saying was the truth. It wasn't some cockamamy attempt to get her off his case. Malfoy was being sincere for once. What he'd told her so far had been hard to take in. For so long she had thought he was a cold, callous, typical pureblood git. She'd never been more wrong. She was a bit scared to hear the rest if she were being honest. What more could he regret? What was worse than all that?

He had stopped talking and was staring off somewhere down the hall. She cleared her throat. "You can stop if you need to. If it's too much."

His head slowly turned until he was looking directly at her again. "Do you need me to stop, Granger?" He asked. She was taken aback. "I know you're a war hero and all, but surely you've come to realize that the good guys don't normally get their hands dirty until they are forced to do so. Their consciences get in the way. But the villains? They have no conscience. They are void of empathy." He sounded angry but she knew it wasn't directed at her. "I'm sure you know where I'm going with this." She nodded silently. "Usually, you'd say you could see better with the light on, but I found out the hard way that when it comes to war, the Light Side doesn't see nearly as much as those in the dark."

She swallowed the lump in her throat as he took a moment to breathe before addressing her once more. "Again, are you sure you want me to continue? I've kept it in for this long. I'm sure I can keep on doing it."

She didn't believe him. He was already so close to the edge as it was. She could see it written across his face like a brand. If he didn't get it out now, he never would. It would haunt him forever. "Tell me," she insisted, "I want you to tell me."

He stared at her hard for a moment, then he said, "Ok. Just, don't...don't say anything. Please." She agreed to remain silent, and he cleared his throat. "Dumbledore was right. Killing isn't as easy as the innocent believe. I had failed to kill him. I was moments away from accepting his help, but my lovely Aunt took care of that. I was stuck and I knew my failure didn't look good. I had...I had to prove myself. To save my family, and to save myself. I had to do what they told me. They made me torture people. You'd think it would be easy to Crucio someone you don't know, you have no ties to them, but it's not. The first time I didn't even make it back to my room before I vomited." He wrinkled his nose.

"I thought surely they would see how weak I was, and I'd be a goner. But they didn't. What they saw was a punishment turning into a lesson learned. I had always excelled in magic, yes even the dark arts, because I was a Malfoy. Learning a spell or two was a right of passage. I know this is what ultimately save my arse. The Dark Lord saw potential in me, on behest of Bella I'm sure, but I didn't enjoy it at all. No amount of amazing magic could change how disgusted I felt every time I was called upon. But I did it every time. Every. Single. Time. Because it was them or me and I was a coward, I wanted to live." He looked down at the floor. "It was so brutal, Granger. The Dark Lord was frightening in his own right, but some of his followers were even more twisted than he was. There were times that Crucio wasn't enough for them. They used spells that would slowly tear the prisoners apart from the inside out. The were still being tortured but they wouldn't die. Not until they were finished with them. It was sick. They were getting off on the bloodshed."

"The killing curse was hardly used. It was over too quickly, you see. Why end the fun so soon?" A dark, deranged sort of laugh escaped his lips. "I stayed the hell out of it. I kept to myself and only showed my face when it was necessary. But then they decide they're going to start hauling my fucking classmates into the dungeon. The day Lovegood was dragged through the dining room I nearly choked on my tea. There was no way I was going to be a part of that. Not to the people I knew. That's why I didn't tell them about Potter. I knew...I knew he was the only solution, loathe as I am to admit it. So I lied. I lied because I knew what would happen. I lied because I saw you with him and I knew it would be so much worse for you. I lied because I would have been a dead man otherwise. I was finished. I couldn't-" He looked away from her. "I know, I know it was the end for me because right before the snatchers brought you to the manor...." Hermione watched him stare blankly at her, almost as if he had forgotten she was even there. His hands gripped the empty bottle so hard his knuckles were white. "They brought in a boy.....said his family was helping The Order. He couldn't have been more than nine years old....." He stopped, letting the bottle fall to the floor and running his hands through his hair.

Even in the shadows cast by the torch behind above them, she could see the guilt and pain shimmering in his silver eyes. It made her chest ache. She stood up slowly. "Malfoy...."

He suddenly advanced on her, grabbing onto her shoulders, his actions desperate. He wanted her to understand, he needed her to. He knew no one else would, but if it was Granger then maybe- "I didn't want to do it!" He cried. "Do you understand? I didn't want to kill him. Muggle, halfblood, squib, it didn't matter. He was a fucking child. He shouldn't have been involved. He was just a little kid...and I....if it was you and your lot, you would've refused but I wasn't strong enough. Even when he cried....begged for his mum. I just closed my eyes...." He swallowed loudly. "So that, Granger. That is my biggest regret. Not being brave enough to do the right thing, not being strong enough to refuse to...to murder a child. I'm a fucking monster. I don't deserve to be here, I don't deserve to even be breathing. I deserve to be in Azkaban with my father for the things I've done." He released her, dropping to his knees and holding his head in his hands.

Hermione was blown away. She had already known that he'd never wanted to be a part of it. Harry had told them that much, but now that she was hearing it directly from him, seeing his conviction with her own eyes, it was hard to process. He'd done some awful things, things she couldn't fathom, things she knew she would never do, but she could see now that his hand was forced. He was obviously thinking about it a lot, and the pain was real. He regretted the things he'd done, he'd regretted all of them. He thought he shouldn't even be alive. His self-hatred was evident. She could see it in his face. She could almost feel the remorse pouring out of him. The man in front of her wasn't the same boy who had tormented her friends and called her a mudblood throughout the years. In the course of a night, she had finally seen something she never thought she'd ever see, not from him. Certainly not from a Malfoy. Yet here they sat, alone on the seventh floor, filling the air with tension and grief. He had changed. He was broken and was struggling with it. She had to do something. Without thinking she dropped to the floor in front of him, taking his hands in hers. He looked up startled. "No, you don't..."

"Don't you dare bloody pity me, Granger." He scoffed, yanking his hands-free.

"I'm not pitying you."

He fidgeted and stood up, wanting to get away from her quickly. He'd just told her something he'd never told anyone. It had all just spilled out of him. He had no way of stopping it. He'd revealed even more than he had initially intended and now there was no going back. She knew now. He felt completely transparent. He had just laid out all his sins at her feet. And now he was scared of what she had to say. He started down the hall.

She stood up, bracing herself against the wall. "I don't think you were a coward." She called after him softly.

He stopped and turned back to her. "What?" Surely he wasn't hearing her right. How could she not think that of him?

"You may not be winning any awards for the most courageous, but you weren't a coward." She repeated, this time, loud enough not to be mistaken. "Sure you were scared, but who wouldn't be? I will be the first one to admit I judged you harshly back then. But I had no idea, the thought hadn't even crossed my mind that you were just another victim. The Dark Lord had set up a headquarters in your house. The place you grew up in. You didn't want to leave your mum so you stayed, despite knowing you'd have to join them. At that point, you probably knew what horrible things would happen to you. But you did it anyway. That was brave." He shook his head but she continued, "No, just listen. I know you think it was just self-preservation, and maybe a part of it was, but you said it yourself. You stayed for your mum. I did the same thing, sending mine away to protect them." She stepped towards him.

"That's different." He said, not looking her in the eye.

"No, it's not. Not really. You did what you had to, to protect her. I did what I had to to protect mine. I obliviated them, Malfoy. That was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but I had no choice. When it came to their safety I'd do anything. I feel like you're the same in that aspect. You love your mother. You did it out of love, not cowardice. And when we were brought to the manor, you knew it was us. You knew it was Harry, but you didn't tell them. You made a choice. You made a decision to not rat us out. Protecting Harry, for any reason, when your "master" was hell bent on destroying him was brave. If they had found out you had lied...they would have tortured you. Maybe they did anyways, but you're right, they would have killed you. You took that all into account and you still didn't give us away. Then...then Bellatrix, when she tortured me...I was blacking out, but I saw you."

His eyes widened. He thought she'd been unconscious at the time.

"Right before.." She took a breath. "Right before Ron and Harry came...you took a step and you had your wand raised just slightly. At first, I thought you wanted to join your aunt, but now I see clearly. It wasn't pointed at me, was it? It was pointed at her. You wanted to stop her, didn't you?"

He turned so his face was hidden from her, but she still heard his coarse whisper. "Yes, I..it was...it sickened me to see what was happening. I told you, I knew it was only going to get worse. I wanted...I didn't know how, but I wanted to stop her."

She took another step. "After everything you've just said, I really think if Harry and Ron hadn't come...I really think you would have tried to save me. I believe that. I really do." They were just inches apart now and in the moonlight she could see his face clearly. It looked confused but somewhat relieved at the same time. His eyes were shining. Had he been trying not to cry? He didn't say anything and neither did she for a moment. They just stood in the empty hall looking at each other. "You're not a monster, Draco." She told him, and then she did something she never thought in a million years she would do. She was running on complete impulse now as she leaned up on her toes and kissed him.

It took him a second to realize what was happening, that he was being kissed by Hermione Granger, whom up until recently he'd called a Mudblood. And another second to realize that even though it would have been against the old Draco's very fiber of being, he didn't care. His hand found its way to her face as he kissed her back with such force that she lost her balance. His other hand slipped around her waist to steady her. She'd done a very scary thing when she'd kissed him. He wasn't sober enough to stop himself from wanting her. He'd wanted to kiss her since she'd told him he should smile more.

Chills erupted at the contact. She couldn't believe she was kissing Malfoy. But it wasn't a bad kiss. No, it was passionate and intoxicating. She bit his bottom lip softly before his tongue beckoned for entrance, which she gladly gave. They both tasted like fire whiskey but it was of no consequence. They were lost to the moment. Both of them recognized that they shouldn't be doing this but neither wanted to stop. His hands were tangling in her hair and hers were traveling up his back. After a few moments, they broke away, breathing heavily. He was looking down at her, not being able to contain the desire he knew was reflecting in his eyes. She saw it and instead of backing away and muttering a goodnight, she stayed rooted to the spot, gazing into his silver orbs as if she was stupefied, which she knew she wasn't.

Then he broke the silence between them. "Say it again," he whispered.

She scrunched up her brows in confusion. "Say what again?"

"My name." If he was embarrassed by his request he didn't show it.

She inhaled and spoke softly, "Draco."

She made a small startled yelp when she found herself being lifted into his arms. She hadn't even seen him move. He kissed her deeply, moving her legs to wrap firmly around his waist. Her hands wove into his hair, pleasantly surprised about how soft it felt between her fingers. He was walking now, carrying her with him. She felt her back hit the stone wall. His left hand pushed her hair out of the way as his mouth moved down from hers to plant hungry kisses down her neck, and onto her collarbone, where he bit down, causing goose bumps to adorn her skin.

She couldn't suppress the involuntary moan that slipped from her lips. Hadn't she said earlier that she wasn't into drunk snogging? Apparently one had to actually be drunk to find it completely thrilling. Or maybe it was completely thrilling simply because it was Malfoy, and she shouldn't be doing it, and she certainly shouldn't be enjoying it.

The sound of boots echoed somewhere farther down the hall. "Who's down there?"

The voice startled them for a moment. Hermione's heart was beating so fast she thought it might escape from her chest. She couldn't be caught snogging him here. It would be the end of her. Something suddenly clicked in the back of her head. "What floor is this?" She whispered.

He tilted his head. "Seven, I ?"

She grinned and silently wished they were somewhere else where they could be alone and the moment the thought crossed her mind, the stones at her back disappeared and a door formed.

"Room of Requirement, good thinking," Draco smirked and shoved it open, hurriedly carrying her inside. She wondered briefly how it had survived the Fiendfyre, magic most likely, but she found herself not caring enough to linger on the answer.

They could hear what she now recognized as Filch's voice getting closer as the door shut firmly behind them but they weren't really worried about it. They were already making their way to the bed that was set in the middle of the room, a small fireplace residing beside it, the logs inside already aflame. Hermione felt herself sink down into the soft mattress as slender hands snaked their way up her body, pulling her shirt off her frame. She knew she should be pushing him away, telling him to stop, but somehow she couldn't find the words. She realized she wanted this. She wanted to know his touch, feel his warmth on her skin.

As if on command, his lips brushed against her, teeth scraping along her now exposed shoulder. She moaned her agreement as he nipped at her earlobe, his fingers working to unbutton her pants. Her heart fluttered nervously in her chest. Oh, Merlin, was she really doing this? She really shouldn't be doing this. It was wrong...crazy. It wasn't like her at all...and yet, that's what made her want it even more. Kissing Draco was addicting, and it was nothing like kissing Ron. Everything about them was different. Even up to the way they smelled.

Draco smelled like whiskey, cologne and hair gel. Which oddly enough reminded her of her father. It was a woodsy, musky scent and she inhaled it as she pulled him closer, allowing herself to let go of all her insecurities. Even as she heard him unbuckle his trousers she knew she didn't want to stop. She didn't want to think about anything anymore. Not about the war, not about Ron, and definitely not about the fact that just hours ago, the man she was snogging was one of her biggest enemies, her rival. For once, Hermione Granger didn't want to think about her actions before she did them.

She found herself running her hands up his shirt, feeling the taut muscles of his abdomen. Since when did he work out? What did it matter? She didn't care when he'd gotten them, she just wanted to rip off his shirt to appreciate them more.

She wanted to laugh. Had she really just thought that? Apparently, she'd been carrying a lot of vent up sexual frustration, and she was about to unleash it out on an unsuspecting Malfoy. And with that thought in mind, she began pulling up his shirt, which he found amusing and helped by taking it all the way off. Her fingers roamed his torso as she became a little daring and bit his neck. He let out a small groan, silently pleaded for her to do it again. She did, sucking on the hot flesh. When she pulled back she noticed the small red mark where her lips just left.

She was so caught up in what she'd been doing that she wasn't even aware of the fact that he'd already pulled off her pants and was working on her knickers until she felt a hand glide down over her thighs and along her calves. She took a shaky breath. This was really happening.

"Move up, Granger."

It took a moment for it to register that he wanted her to move to the middle of the bed. She did so as he kicked off his pants and crawled up to her, palming her breast as he claimed her lips once more. His kiss was demanding, yet gentle. She could honestly kiss him all night and be fully satisfied. But she could feel his arousal against her stomach and knew this was going to go way beyond kissing. But she'd already known that the moment her clothes were flung haphazardly on the floor.

He withdrew from her for a moment, catching his breath. The fire cast an orange glow on him and she thought he looked rather sexy starting at her.

Then he smirked, looking down at her beautifully exposed body. "I'm sorry, Granger. I lied before."

She looked up at him, a little fearful, surely this all wasn't a ruse. "About what?"

He gave her a wolfish grin. "I do believe I will gobble you up."

She was so relieved that she couldn't even give a response before his head disappeared between her legs, his tongue warm and hot against her clit. She's startled by the low, throaty moan that escapes her lips. He seemed to like the reaction he was getting and continued to slide his tongue along her womanhood.

Her hands moved of their own accord, threading themselves into his hair as he laved and sucked, enticing more pretty moans from her. If she was in her right mind she would be mortified thatanyone's tongue was exploring her there. She wasn't a prude by any means, but she'd never done this before. She was enjoying the sensation.

"Mmm, so wet, Granger." He hummed into her soft skin.

"Who...Who do you think... made me that way?" She asked, trying to get a hold of herself. The room was spinning but she wasn't quite sure if it was him or the whiskey, causing it to do so.

"Point taken." He replied, lifting his head and giving a lopsided grin, before inserting a finger into her entrance.

She bucked her hips up, meeting his palm as he slid another finger inside her. This wasn't the first time someone had done that but it was the first time she'd reacted so violently to it. She felt his hot breath on her navel and glanced down in time to see his mouth latch onto her right breast, teeth biting down ever so softly. She wondered if he knew how good he was with his hands. Knowing him, he probably did. He'd obviously done this before. She tried not to think about it as his mouth left her breast and found her clit again, sucking it hard while his fingers continued their ministrations, causing her head to swirl.

"Ah, Malfoy..." She breathed. "Too much...ah...stop."

He kept going. He wanted to hear her moan louder. "Just...a bit more...."

She couldn't focus on what he was saying. Her legs were shaking and she was slowly losing feeling in her toes. Her breath came out in rapid bursts, her chest rising and falling steadily. Every touch and lick were like electricity on her skin and she wanted nothing more than to melt away in the wonder of it all. The heat was spreading inside of her. It was coming. She could feel it, her breath halting and mouth tingling as her nails worked circles into his scalp. Almost...almost. More. More. "Oh, god!"

He pulled up, watching her expression. "That's it." He murmured. "Come for me, Granger."

And she did, hard and loud, soaking the sheets and his hand in the process. She shut her eyes, reveling in the post orgasmic high she was experiencing.

The look on her face was just too much for him, though. He wiped his hand on the bed before positioning himself between her legs. He kissed his way up her body until she opened her eyes, locking them with his.

Her heart was thumping so loud she was sure he would hear it. Was she really going through with this? She didn't really know what to expect, she'd never gone this far with Ron. Her stomach was a bundle of nerves, yet she found herself stirring again with anticipation as he ground against her.

"Wa-Wait...we...shouldn't..."

His movements ceased and that's all it took for her to know how much she really wanted it. She bucked her hips up to meet his and ran her hands up his chest and onto his back, kissing him hard.

"Granger," his voice barely registered as a whisper in her ear. "You don't have to try so hard. We can still stop you know."

There was something about the way he said it, so soft and husky, and she reacted to it. She shook her head. "I think you and I both know we're far past the point of stopping." She replied, meeting his heated stare with one of her own. "I want you."

And with those three words he lost it. He entered her, slowly but completely, filling her up. Pain, numbed by alcohol, ripped through her. She gasped and dug her nails into his back. It would probably leave marks later but right now she couldn't care less. It was a strange sensation having him inside of her, one accompanied by pain and pleasure. She was unsure when the former would end but she hoped it was soon. She wanted him to go faster but feared she might break.

She was so tight. He wanted to tear her up so bad, but he could see the look in her eyes and wondered if this could, in fact, be her first time. He shrugged the thought off. She couldn't possiblybe a virgin. She'd been Viktor Krum's eye candy and The Golden Trio's love bird for years. He slowly pulled out anyway, easing back in as she adjusted to him. It took a few more times at this pace before her fingers relaxed, and grew more comfortable. After a moment she leaned up, planting a kiss on his already chapped lips and sighed.

He thrust into her, one hand in her hair and the other steadying himself above her. His tongue ventured into her mouth once again as they settled into a steady rhythm. Her eyes were closed but she had his face scorched into her memories. She felt as if her body was no longer her own while she was under him. It felt like almost like they were an extension of each other. And that kind of scared her. The fact that someone could make her feel so unlike herself. Not to mention just who that someone was.

But nothing seemed to matter at this moment. He was hitting something inside of her that made her toes curl. "Ahhhh, Malfoy.." She called out, unable to control herself.

His speed became erratic, hips colliding frantically, rocking the bed with the motion as she called out his name once more. She couldn't hush the cries echoing in the room and he couldn't believe how beautiful and hot she was beneath him. They were coming dangerously close to consuming each other and there was nothing they could do to stop it.

He was at his breaking point. Every time he heard that silky voice moan his name, he felt like he was going to explode, which happened anyway, minutes later, spilling himself inside of her.

She found that she loved the way he groaned as he came, and the way his eyes squeezed shut as he collapsed on top of her, chest heaving. They were both slick with sweat but she didn't care. She was so past the point of caring.

What she felt was relief. This was just what she had needed. She briefly wondered if this was merely a drunken dream, but as she felt his heart beat in time with hers, she knew it wasn't a dream. It was real. It was bit strange, though, the feeling of having someone else's heart beating with hers, but she thought it was fascinating and didn't want to break the embrace.

After a moment he pulled out, rolling onto his back and she moved to lay her head on his chest. He subconsciously wrapped an arm around her and she was comforted by it though she wouldn't say so. She waited for any indication of him leaving and when none came she sighed and let her eyes close. Neither of them really knew what to say, so they remained silent, letting the fire die out and sleep overtake them.