Chapter 22

KATNISS' POV

I wake up to bright lights shining above me. I groggily sit up and look around. My head is pounding and my left side hurts so bad that i can barely breath

I cringe as oxygen demands to flow in and out of my lungs

Theres is a plastic surgical tube running up my arm, morphine being pumped into my bloodstream

There is no sign of anyone coming in, so I lay my head back down on the firm pillow and stare at the ceiling

As i lie there, i remember a specific day back in 12. The day i told Peeta i was pregnant for the first time, his reaction was priceless

At first he didn't believe me, he actually thought i was tricking him. I chuckle at the thought

When i finally convinced him it was true, he was so happy that his eyes welled with tears

He was always convinced that Bare was a girl, up until the day he was born. He tried so hard to convince me of it too, but knew it was boy, i could feel it somehow

I also remember the last time Peeta was taken over by his hijackings. I was 8 months pregnant, and we were sitting at home, when all of a sudden Peeta stood up and looked at me. His eyes were so dark and i was so afraid

He grabbed my wrists and pushed me against the sliding glass door

"Mutt!" he yelled, it was so sharp and abrupt that i started to scream

Usually i noticed much sooner that he was acting different, then i had enough time to leave. But this time i wasn't thinking clearly

I must have shrieked really loud, because about 60 seconds later, the front door burst open and Haymitch ran in. he grabbed Peeta from behind, pulled him to the ground, and smashed a lamp over his head, knocking him out cold

I know it was wrong, but i began to laugh. There he was, my husband lying unconscious on the floor, a lamp smashed next to him and Haymitch's hands bloody from the glass lamp pieces

"What are you laughing at sweetheart?" he had said with a grin.

After Bare was born, Peeta never..... Bare!

I jump out of bed and run for the door, bad idea. As soon as i'm upright, my head starts to spin and my ribs throb with pain

I hear footsteps outside my door. I bet you can guess who it was

"Katniss?" Gale asks, i moan

"What are you doing?!" he helps me back into bed

"Bare, wheres Bare?!" i yell, Gale puts his hand over my mouth

"Shhh, its ok Katnip, we have him:"

"Is he okay?"

"We can talk about it later, are you okay?"

"Yeah yeah i'm fine, what happened?"

"Well, Bare was roped to a chair, in a room in the back of the main hall. When we got in there we saw explosives tethered to the chair. As soon as he stands up, the bombs would go off. Haymitch tried so hard to get you back safely to the aircraft, but eventually we had to undo the ropes or the bomb would go off from the timer":

"I left the room because we lost contact with Haymitch, while i was gone Bare accidentally triggered the bomb and that's when everyone went flying" my head spins as i listen to Gale tell the story, how could this happen?

It seems that ever since we got back to the capitol, my life has been crumbling bit by bit, everything that could go wrong, has. Everyone i love has been injured in some way, then it dawned on me

"Haymitch! Is he okay?"

"We don't know, he's in a coma right now, but there doesn't appear to be any internal damage"

"I'm sorry i took off" Gale just laughs

"You really think i didn't know you were going to run off? Why do you think Haymitch came with?"

"Because he wanted to find Bare and Peeta?"

"Well yes, but it was more because we both knew you were going to come, so he agreed to come with and go with you to find Peeta. We knew he was the only one you would allow to go with you"

i don't know why, but i feel a little betrayed by Haymitch's reasoning

It must have shown because Gale looks up and begins to assure me he wasn't babysitting me

"He would have come anyway Katniss, but instead of helping us we decided he should help you" he says, scratching his head

I give him a reassuring nod, but i don't trust him at all

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I lay in that cold metal bed for 2 days, nurses constantly coming in and out to checking vitals and bringing food and medication

My mother visits frequently with news of how Oakley is doing

but she still works here which means most of the time i'm alone with my thoughts, and of course this "lovely" plastic tube in my arm

I haven't slept in days, i can't until mom tells me Oakley and Bare are ok. But after awhile of protest, my body gives up and my eyes begin to droop

Just as i'm being pulled under into the subtle luxury of slumber, Gale walks in and sits down in the chair next to me, his head in his hands

"Katniss i'm so sorry" he says, his breathing uneven and his words shaky

"Whats wrong Gale?" i ask nervously but stern

It better not be about Bare, if he doesn't make it i don't know what i'd do to myself, losing him would be agony

"Its Bare" Gale says sorrowfully, my heart sinks into the depths of my soul as my brain tries to process the words

"He has multiple injuries, but he hit his head so hard that his brain started bleeding internally. There is still a chance of survival. We are doing everything we can"

My hands shake uncontrollably

Why can't i catch a break? Ever since we got here it's been one thing after another and I don't know how much longer i can go on

I had finally put the tragedy of my past behind me. But more has replaced it

"Gale, i could've...." Gale cuts me off

"There's nothing you could have done, us trying to get him out set off the explosion-"

"No, that's not it. Right before the aircraft took off, i saw Peeta chained up, he stared at me longingly, he wanted me to shoot him"

Gale puts his hand on my shoulder

"I was so selfish! I wanted Peeta back, but now he has to suffer until we can get to him again, if they haven't killed him already"

"Katniss, it isn't your fault... if it was reversed, i'm sure he wouldn't have been able to shoot you either"

"He wanted me to kill him" i tell Gale, my heart pounding

"And i should have"

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I get to my feet, even though I still walk wobbly, i somehow make it to a room down the hall, Gale is standing outside the door

"Hey Katnip" i smile the best i can, given the circumstances

"Plutarch said you needed to see me?"

"Yes, please come in here" he says, opening the door

I get light headed as i come face to face with my hopes and fears, swirled together in a blurry tidal wave of emotion

I begin to really smile, and a gasp of relief escapes me

"Bare!"

hi guys! a bit of a less climactic chapter! only a couple more chapters until its over!

so guess what?! IM SEEING AVENGERS ENDGAME IN AN HOUR!!! it premiered last night and i CANT WAIT

                                        -  your worst nightmare?