11

"She's only thinking about herself."

"As she should."

"Hyung," the man exclaims frustratedly. "You should be on my side, not hers!"

"OK, first of all, you need to calm down. You came to me for advice and that's what I'm giving you. I'm not on anyone's side." The older sibling let out a deep sigh at his younger brother's childish behavior. "Secondly, this isn't about you Namjoon-ah. This is about Y/N."

"I didn't say it was about me," Namjoon muttered, swallowing half of his Soju as he glared at Jin who sat across from him.

They were currently seated at Seokjin's newly opened five-star restaurant near Seoul. It was when he received a call from his younger brother about a "serious matter" that he found himself in this situation rather than focusing on his work.

Namjoon was eager to tell him his side of the story, about how you decided to resign at the last minute, and Namjoon's inability to accept your decision. So who was he to turn him down.

Jin was even more perplexed as to why Namjoon couldn't stop talking about you—even going so far as to call it 'pathetic' when you refused to return the car he had given you for her birthday. The man was starting to get a headache at this point. If he only knew, he would choose not to involve himself in this.

Clearly, it was a matter between the two of you, and he would prefer not to take sides. "Why can't you just accept it?" Jin presses. There had to be a reason why his younger brother was so preoccupied with this particular subject. "It's not like she'll be gone forever. She'll still be around. What's the problem?"

"It's not that simple. I need her," Namjoon can't believe the words that are coming out of his mouth. It's so unlike him to willingly put himself out there. But it's not like he's talking to a stranger.

Jin stays silent for a moment until he says, "You need her?" The left side of the man's lip curls up in a knowing look.

I know they were hitting it on the low! Jin has to fight the urge to boast about his assumption. When they both visited back in Ilsan, he found it oddly suspicious, as did the excessive worry in his younger brother's eyes when looking at Y/N. He knew the look all too well not to recognize it.

Namjoon looks away pointedly, unwilling to confirm or deny. He doesn't think this is worth discussing. People won't understand. No one will understand the relationship he has with his assistant. They get condescending, as if they suddenly have a say in your life.

"That's not relevant," Namjoon mutters, refusing to say more than needed.

"It is relevant when you're talking to me about it." Jin scoffs. "If not, you wouldn't waste your time coming to me about this. . ." He comments sharply.

Nevertheless, Namjoon continues without much care compared to when he first showed up, almost looking as if he hadn't slept in weeks just by the bags under his eyes and the unkempt hair that threatened to show around his defined jaw. "No one knows me better than she does. It only makes sense for me to keep her, don't you think?"

Jin shakes his head in disbelief, glancing up at the ceiling, and back down at Namjoon.

He's really losing it.

"You're talking like she's some kind of object you can tame," Jin mumbles disapprovingly trying to make sense of it all.

"Hyung, stop putting words in my mouth. I never said that. She can do whatever she wants, I'm not stopping her."

"You know what I think?" Jin lowers his voice, looking around the room to make sure they were far from prying ears, and once he does, he says. "I think you have feelings for her."

"What?" The younger almost choked at Jin's words. "Of course not! You're out of your mind," Namjoon hissed, kicking him beneath the table and earning a mouthful of curses from Jin. "How the hell did you get to that conclusion?"

"Oww, you shithead!" The man hisses at the impact, his face contorting into a hilarious expression. "Do that again and I'll throw you out myself."

Namjoon crosses his arm in irritation. "Seriously, hyung. You need to learn how to be quiet."

"I can do whatever I want, this is my restaurant. If you have a problem you can go—"

"Fine, whatever." Namjoon sighed in defeat, not in the mood to start another argument. "I'm just stressed out about this whole thing and I don't know what to do anymore." He sighs and rubs the side of his forehead.

"I just... I tried to convince her, but it seems like she was determined to quit. I don't understand. Did I do something wrong?" He tries to come up with possible reasons. "I mean, was I not good to her all these years?"

Jin cocked his head to the side. "That's enough, Namjoon-ah." The man looked worried for his brother. He's never seen him act like this because of an employee, or anyone for that matter. Not even his ex-girlfriend of almost a year. If he was hell-bent on holding on to you, this must be a touchy subject for him.

"I think you need to give her time. Maybe she needs something new in her life, it's not like we're getting any younger. She must want to start a new life, start meeting people, build a family of her own, a decent guy she can settle down with—"

"A what?" Namjoon couldn't believe what he was hearing. He was sure that wasn't the reason for your decision.

"A family, kids, a husband..." Jin trails off, and he can see the unreadable expression on Namjoon's face when he catches on. His smile slowly faded at the thought.

Jin clears his throat. "I mean, the list goes on."

Family. Kids. Husband.

Husband.

Jin's unexpected words strike a chord in his chest. Namjoon glares out into the bustling city with glassy eyes. Fear roils around in his stomach, making him all twitchy and uncomfortable.

"What's with the look?" Jin questioned, looking at his little brother in a way that raises suspicion. "You don't think it's possible?"

"I don't know..." Namjoon's tone tightens as if his logical thoughts had come to a halt.

Namjoon feels like he's suffocating as he reaches to loosen the tie around his neck. "Why would she need to quit her job for that? She can still do all these things without having to resign. It's not like I'm prohibiting her from dating. That's her choice."

"I don't think it's entirely about that," Jin says, placing another dish on the table. He reaches for the apron around his waist before tossing it to one of his employees. "We don't know her reason for it, and it certainly ain't our business," Jin lets out a deep breath before continuing. "However, you can't blame her for wanting to experience life outside of being your assistant, Namjoon-ah. She's worked under your company for years, that must've taken most of her time to even socialize and enjoy her life."

Jin pauses to look at Namjoon. "Do you get what I'm saying?"

Namjoon's posture, which until this point has shown to be very relaxed and fairly detached, changes.

Maybe Jin's right about this.

Namjoon is now leaning away from the table. "I'm not trying to pry into her life," he defended. "I just can't help but wonder..." Fairly enough, he thinks he deserves to know. Some kind of explanation.

Jin raises an eyebrow. "Since when were you curious about your employees?" He presses, "And especially if it comes to Y/N... you usually never ask about her, or wonder what she's up to—"

"You're making me sound like a complete asshole of a boss." Namjoon cuts him off before he could let his mouth spill more hurtful words. "Of course, I care about my employees. I always have." He admits. "Y/N... she's... she's not just an employee to me."

It's not a lie. He's let you in too deep with his family to treat you as an employee. But he also knows that you aren't the closest of friends. And thinking about it, you never put a label on it. Never thought of putting a title. Nowadays, things aren't as simple as they used to be.

For him, and with you, whom he couldn't figure out.

Do you even count as a friend? Does an employee and boss count as friends? Two people who have known each other for far longer than they can remember. He believes it does.

And by how much he's invested in you, he'd better believe it.

Jin backs away slightly, finding the situation amusing. "More than an employee?" He fights the smirk wanting to curve his mouth. "The girl was at each of your beck and call. . ."

Namjoon doesn't say anything. Just ponders over his brother's words- - harsh and straight to the point (maybe a little too much) before he slaps a hand to his head and treads his fingers along the tip of the shot glass.

It mocks him and laughs at his situation; tipsy and hopeless.

"Ugh. This is all just getting to my head," Namjoon grumbles and forces his eyes shut. "I shouldn't let it," he says, more like whispering to himself as Jin gives him a strange look on his face that screams 'What the fuck', thinks it's something deeper than what Namjoon admits to himself.

Feelings yet to be discovered.

But it's not his place to say anything when it's becoming too obvious with his actions and words.

Y/N isn't just an employee to him.

Isn't she?

Before silence could wash over them, Namjoon speaks. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. The less I think about it, the better." Namjoon grumbles, gulping down a cool cup of water. Once the rim graces his slightly swollen lips, he sips just the littlest bit.

He swallows thickly. "Thinking of this isn't doing me any good. . ."

There is a plastered smirk on Jin's face as he swallows his red wine.

It's only a matter of time until his little brother realizes. . .

✧ ✦ ✧

"I've read your portfolio, Miss Park, and I must say, I am more than impressed. It's no surprise that your academics were outstanding, and having worked with one of the most successful bachelors right now, you are undeniably one of the top applicants we are looking into,"

Shock and searing pride run through you as you extend your hand to a forty-something-year-old man. Bang Si-Hyuk owned the well-known law firm you've been trying to apply to for a few months now.

It was time to put your degree to use at some point, and supposedly, the man had only gotten to review your application when he heard you were resigning from Namjoon's company.

You should be honored because quite frankly, it intrigued him.

You make sure your handshake is strong; Mr. Bang's is a vise. "Kim Namjoon has a good reputation." He brings up your boss and you're not surprised.

You break away from each other as he walks back to his desk. "At such a young age he raised the bar high for other entrepreneurs. With such intelligence..." he says just before you sit down on one of the chairs. "You must have learned a lot from him, correct?"

Mr. Bang isn't the first one to ask about him during job interviews. Questions about his work ethic, and personal life spark conversations. Blah. Blah. Blah.

Everywhere you went, the name follows. The mere thought has you wondering if you were really interesting enough if you hadn't become Namjoon's assistant... if you hadn't worked for him, where would you be right now?

You can't help but doubt your capabilities. . . like you're nothing without him. I mean, yes, you got to where you are because of him, and for that, you will be forever in debt to him.

You slip out of your thoughts when he finally closes your portfolio. "However, Miss Park... there is something I'm concerned about..." he pauses and intertwines his fingers. "May I ask why you didn't pursue your desired career as soon as you graduated? I mean, most students would think that going straight for an internship is the smartest move."

"I was hired by Mr. Kim himself, Sir," you began. "That time, I thought it was the easiest way to build my profile and experience. Although I could've spent those years working in the legal field, I found a different path that I will never regret."

"Would you have made the same decision if you were given the chance to?" He asks.

"Absolutely," you say without a doubt. "I wouldn't be where I am now without the help of my peers. I'm truly grateful."

"Very well, Miss Park." He says as he stands from his chair and walks around his desk, "Thank you for your honesty. We'll get back to you as soon as possible."

A smile forms on your lips as you bow to him. "Thank you for taking the time, Sir." You shake his hand once more before he shows you out of the room. "I hope to hear back from you soon."

✧ ✦ ✧

"I think I did well," you mumble into the speaker.

"You think?" Your sister mumbles on the other side as she holds the twins, Yaji and Inso in each of her arms.

You simply hum, tiredly pressing the button on the elevator to your designated floor. As soon as it opens, you rest your back against the cold surface, starting to feel the ache on your legs due to the various job interviews you've completed today, with one promise at the end - that you'll hear from them soon.

You're fairly certain that half of those interviews were hit or miss, with some not taking you seriously as soon as you mentioned being an assistant with no legal experience, and others not knowing who you were, which you didn't mind as long as they considered your credentials.

Unfortunately, some of them didn't think your experiences were relevant to the legal field. Though you understood where they were coming from, it's only fair to hire someone with more experience, and more understanding of the law.

But somehow, it was difficult not to feel dejected. This wasn't your first but it felt worse knowing that this was something you were passionate about.

"Hey, you're being fairly quiet," Sooya interjects with your thoughts.

"Just had a long day, I guess."

"Don't be discouraged, Sis. I'm sure one of those firms will contact you. I mean hello? you're Park Y/N, what more could they want—"

You can't help but shrug her words aside. "Park Y/N, huh..." you mumble, forcing your body off the walls of the elevator as the door finally opens. "Yeah, I guess one of them will call."

The walk to your complex is silent, the only sound from the jingle of your keys. Once you're in, you slide off your heels and opt for the comfy slippers as you proceed to throw your belongings on the coffee table.

You glance at your phone to check if she's still there, and once you push the device to your ears, you hear the voice of your nieces. "Hey, Yaya! We miss you," they squeal and wriggle around their mother's hold.

"Hi girls, how's everything?" You subconsciously grin just hearing their voices. "I hope you're not giving mommy a hard time..."

"No Yaya, we've been good girls around the house. I help mommy with the cleaning," You recognize Yaji's voice, the curly-headed girl who resembles her father.

"Wow, that's impressive," you cooed, discarding your work clothes in the hamper. "How about our little Inso?"

"I'm still little so I can't reach the stool to help wash the dishes, Yaya..." You can almost hear her pout on the other side of the phone. You bite your lip and fight the urge to laugh at her solemn voice.

"Oi, that's alright baby." You try and comfort her, knowing Inso is a little more sensitive than Yaji. "Just behave and obey mommy's rules, okay? I'll try and bring presents soon."

"Hmm, okay, Yaya. We love you! Byeee!" They both shout in unison, the sound of silly mooches fading in the background as Sooya takes the phone back. "Oh my god, I think my daughters love you more," she groans annoyingly.

You snort, unable to hide your amusement. "I can't help it, Sooya. I'm just the best aunty in the world," you tease her even more which you know will press her buttons.

"Whatever you say..."

"As much as I'd love to stay and chat, I've gotta hop in the shower. I've got a long day tomorrow," you say, frowning as you look down at your watch. "Talk soon, Sis."

"Alright then, good night."

You both say your goodbyes before you get ready for bed.

When the darkness finally fills your chilly bedroom, the thought of one person crosses your mind before you are lulled to sleep...