Chapter 12

The drive to Billie's place was a mix of chaotic and frantic outfit adjustments in the backseat. We settled on a mini skirt with a cropped loose shirt and a leather jacket sprawled on top. Something cute but simple.Ivy half hanging out the window, screamed the lyrics to whatever song was playing on the radio, whilst Aidan tried to fix his hair in the rear view mirror.Meanwhile I sat frozen in the passenger seat, fingers twisted in my lap, staring at the GPS like it might offer me some kind of emotional support.My chest ached from how hard my heart was pounding. I hadn't seen Billie since we kissed, and now I was on my way to her house for a party, pretending I wasn't completely unraveling.

"You good?" Ivys voice cut through the noise, yanking me out of my thoughts

"Yeah", I lied, tugging the jacket sleeves over my hands,

Ivy smirked like she could see right through me."Relax, it's just Billie, and you already kissed her. What's left to stress about?"

I groaned, sliding down in my seat until my knees hit the dashboard. "Maybe the fact that we haven't talked since then? Or that she called me out of nowhere to invite us to a last minute party? Or that my entire existence might be crumbling?"

Aidan snorted from the drivers seat."Or maybe she just wants to see you again"

My stomach flipped, i pressed my palms against my bare thighs, willing myself to calm down.When we finally pulled up to Billie's gated driveway, I thought I might actually throw up. The gate slid open, and Aidan gave a low whistle.

"Okay, low key jealous, this place is insane."

My mind was too loud, buzzing with a million possibilities of how this night could go terribly wrong. Before I could spiral any further, Ivy grabbed my hand and yanked me out of the car.The door swung open before we could even knock, and my breath caught in my throat. Billie stood there, Jordan's on her feet. Wearing the most outrageously baggy jeans and a tight tank top witch a lacy bra poking out the top. I couldn't help but to look. I've never seen her dressed like this. I was mesmerised. Her dark hair fell in wild waves around her face, and she looked so effortlessly perfect.

"You made it" she said, her smile easy.

"Yeah" I breathed.

Her gaze lingered on me a beat longer than necessary, and I swore my skin burned where her eyes traced over me. Then she shifted her attention to Ivy and Aidan, her smile widening.

"Ivy, right? You're the one who wants fries instead of flowers?"

Ivy gasped, clutching my arm like she might combust.

"You remembered?"

"I almost had some delivered" Billie said, stepping back in to let us inside."But i thought a party might be more fun" she giggled

Ivy turned to me, her face pure disbelief. "She almost bought me fries. Emmy, marry her"

Billie laughed, the sound low and warm, and I thought I might actually drop dead.

The house smelled like vanilla and something faintly smoky, music spilling through hidden speakers, people were already everywhere - sprawled across couches, dancing in the living room and raiding the kitchen.

"Make yourselves at home" Billie said, her eyes flicking to me as she spoke, like the words were meant more for me than anyone else.

I nodded, rubbing my clammy hands against my skirt. "Thanks"Billie stared me up at down, stopping at the end of my short skirt. I felt my heart explode.She tapped the back of my arm, the touch light, barely there, but it sent a ripple through me like I'd been electrocuted.

"Come find me later, Emmy" she said, her voice soft, before disappearing into the crowd.

I stood frozen, heart slamming against my ribs, the sound of my nickname in her voice echoed through my head like a loop I couldn't turn off.

"Come find me later" Ivy mimicked, wiggling her eyebrows "You're so screwed."

"I'm gonna pass out" I whispered, grabbing a drink from the kitchen and downing half of it in one go

But even as the party buzzed around me, my mind stayed stuck on Billie's words, repeating over and over like a broken record.

'Come find me later, Emmy'

Like she was actually hoping I would. But from that minute on I knew I wasn't going to let Billie control my feelings for her, if I see her, I'll go say hi but for the rest of the night I just wanted to have fun. She can come to me if she wants.

-

The party buzzed around me, a living breathing thing, but I existed above it- untouchable, unaffected. The music vibrated through my ribs a steady pulse.

I stretched out on one of the couches, drink in hand, and laughed like I had no worries at all.Because I didn't

Not really.

I wasn't searching for Billie, if anything, I was making it easier for her to find me - sprawled out, loud, living it up like I owned the place. If she wanted me, she could simply come get me.

"Seriously?" Ivy plopped down next to me, kicking her feet up into the table. "You're just gonna lounge around like a smug little menace?"

I smirked, twirling my glass on my fingers."I'm done chasing her, if I chase her, it's no fun"

Aidan laughed from across the room, tossing a ping pong ball towards a cup "You're a monster, Em"

I shrugged, unbothered, watching the room, people came up to talk to me - fans of my music, partygoers looking to flirt, but I kept it all light, easy, letting Billie see it every single time.

I knew she was watching.

The first time I caught her, she was halfway across the room, talking to someone but glancing over their shoulder at me. I tipped my drink to her, slow and deliberate, then turned back to my conversation like she didn't exist.The second time, I was dancing , my body moving without a care in the world. I felt her eyes on me like a weight, and instead of looking back, I just laughed louder, throwing mg head back like the night itself belonged to me.

The third time I finally gave her a taste of her own medicine: I caught her gaze, held it, and bit my bottom lip - just enough to watch her jaw clench before I turned and disappeared onto the deck. I leaned against the railing, letting the night air cool my skin. I barely lasted two minutes before the door slid open behind me. I didn't turn around, just smiled to myself.

When I finally glanced over my shoulder, Billie stood there, gripping the doorframe like it might steady her.

"Hey, Emmy" she said, voice low, but there was a tightness in her throat.

I let my head tilt, casual, easy "hey"

She exhaled through her nose, like she was trying to steady herself, like she hated how effortlessly I got to her. Then, just as quickly, she shook her head, muttered something under her breath, and disappeared back inside.

I laughed softly, shaking my head.

By the time I wandered back into the party, Billie was perched on the arm of a couch, eyes flicking to me, then away, then back again like she was trying to resist the pull. But the more I ignored her, the worse it got - fingers raking through her hair, her jaw tensing, her teeth worrying her lip so hard I thought she might make it bleed.I stretched out on another couch, one arm draped lazy over the back, my gaze slide past her like she wasn't even there.

It was cruel

It was delicious.

And when she finally cracked - when she pushed off the couch and strode toward me like she couldn't take another second of the distance - I knew I had her exactly where I wanted.

I felt her before I saw her.Billie moved through the party like a storm cloud, tension rolling off her in waves, her presence had cut through the rooms heat, the moment she locked into me; I knew - this wasn't over. Not even close.I didn't react, didn't shift, didn't straighten, didn't give her the satisfaction of knowing she was getting to me. Instead, I took another slow sip of my drink, the ice clinking softly against the glass, and stretched out a little further, like I was sinking into the moment.Like I hadn't been waiting for her to break.

She stopped just short of the couch, standing above me with her arms crossed, a delicate thread of control barely holding her together.

"You think this is funny?" She asked, voice low but charged.

I let my eyes drag up to meet hers, taking my time. Her lips were parted, breath uneven, like she'd ran here, like the space I'd put between us had felt unbearable.

"Think what's funny?" I asked lazily, tilting my head.

Her jaw flexed "you know what"

I smirked "oh Billie" I sighed her name, tasting it, drawing it out to just watch her reaction. Her fingers twitched at her sides, like she wanted to grab me, shake me, do anything but stand there unraveling under my gaze. I leaned forward, just enough that the space between us tightened, humming with something electric, "You're making this alot harder on yourself." I murmured.

Her breath hitched, and for a second -just a second - she looked wrecked.

Then she scoffed, shaking her head like she could will herself back into control."God, you're such a -" she stopped herself, exhaling sharply, hands clenching into fists.

I just grinned. "Go on. Say it"

She didn't, instead she turned on her heel and stalked off, pushing past a group of people like they didn't exist. I watched her go, my smirk depending