🌼evil bambi🌼

So..Lucifer had probably 5 cups of coffee..he was just drinking coffee after coffee to keep me talking but once he started physically bouncing I had to cut him off.

Now he's jumping like niffty does to keep up with me as we walk home.

"Baby did you know that spiders can't chew."

"Uh-..no.."

"Yeah. And the human brain slowly eats itself. And being in love is biochemically identical to having a severe obsessive compulsive disorder."

"Hun-"

"And horned lozards can squirt blood out of their eyes."

"Okay..how about we play the quiet game..?"

He hums.

We walk in silence for maybe 30 seconds before he speaks again.

"There's a myth that pigs are really just demon souls, and they physically can't look up at the sky because demons aren't allowed to glimpse heaven."

"Lucifer.."

"That's why their eyes are so identical to human eyes." He whispers.

"You're creeping me out."

"Carry me." He stops, though he definitely wasn't asking.

"No."

"Please."

"Nope."

"Please."

"No."

"Please baby~"

..

"I hate you, come here."

I yank him up with a tentacle, setting him on my shoulders.

He hugs my head nuzzling against my ears happily.

"Ears never stop growing." He whispers.

"Lucifer Morningstar!"

"Sorry!"

I sigh, walking up the hill to the hotel, but the closer I get I notice a figure.A tall curvy woman...with that familiar long blonde hair and long horns..

"Uhm...sweetheart.."

He hums, his head against my ears.

"You uh..may wanna look up."

He sits up, I can feel his body tense the moment he sees her.I set him down, pulling him into my arms.

"I told her I'd make sure she's dead if she showed.."

I kiss his head.

His is still vibrating from the high levels of caffeine.

"We can turn around and handle it later?"

"No. I don't want her around Charlie."

"Okay. Then..after you."