m y r t l e

Draco POV___________

It's been a week since our trip to France and our break up.

I haven't talked to her in a long time, it's getting hard to bare. Every time we meet each other on a corridor or in common room, I'm fighting with myself. I want to tell her how I feel, I want to assure her everything's fine, but I can't. I just clench my teeth and walk away from her.

Even if we meet in our dorms with nobody watching, I still can't know if the dark Lord won't know about us. It's the voices in her head I'm afraid about, and what concerns me the most is why she didn't tell me about it in the hospital. Was she just scared or did she do it on purpose? I don't know, but after all, she lied.

I can't explain myself how can the Dark Lord get into her head so easily and if so, why doesn't he use it on more people to make them go mad? Or maybe he does, but no one confessed it...

All I know is that it's hurting her and it has to stop. If she's gonna faint every day, people will have questions and that's what can't happen. She has to fight it, she has to learn occlumency.

As I'm sitting in the Transfiguration class with professor McGonagall, I glance at Chloé sitting in the back like me. She's not paying attention because she's drawing into one of her sketchbooks. She does is in every class when she's bored. One of her blonde strand of hair just fell into her eyes and she blew air to make it go away.

I like watching her, it's calming. She has that kind of energy that just makes you want to close your eyes and relax.

It's so unfair of anyone to want such a thing from her. To want her sabotage her mother country. She's so young, she shouldn't be having problems like that. I can't even imagine that it must be like for her. For someone with such a situation going on, she seems pretty calm today.

"...mr Malfoy?"

I quickly narrowed my shoulders and looked at professor McGonagall.

"Yes?"

"Answer my question." She's always impatient with me, she can't stand me.

Of course I haven't been listening, my mind is full of Chloé.

I quickly glanced at her and realized it wasn't such a good idea, because everyone is looking at me.

"I-I'm..." I mumbled.

Everything is just so overwhelming, the room got warm from all of sudden.

"Excuse me..." I said and stood up from my desk.

"Mr Malfoy!?"

McGonagall kept shouting at me, but I had to get out of that class.

I walked fast through the corridor, nervously loosening my tie because I felt like it's choking me.

Everyone wants something from me and it's just so much.

My parents want me to succeed in my first task, they're counting on me, because they know it can end bad for us if I fail. My mother doesn't deserve misery, I can't disappoint her. If I fail, she's going down with me and I can't let that happen.

Snape is convinced that I can't do anything, that I'm just a loser. And maybe he's right. Maybe I am.

Chloé thinks I can protect her, she hopes that I can make it go away, but i can't do such thing. I can't do anything to protect her and I hate myself because of that. The truth is, no one is safe from the Dark Lord.

My thoughts are killing me.

I keep waking towards the Myrtle's bathroom and when I get there, I shut the door with a loud bang.

"Who is it?!" Asked Myrtle from one of the toilets.

"Just me." I replied, trying to hold my tears and stepped in front of a sink.

My reflection in the mirror is laughing at me. Everyone is laughing at me and pointing their fingers and all I can do is cry about it. I'm such a fool, what did I think? That I can save Chloé? That we can live a long happy life?

We'll never be happy, not as long as he's out there.

Tears start to slowly run down my cheeks as I lean over the sink. I can't look at myself anymore.

"What is it, Draco?" Asked Myrtle again and flew closer to me.

"I messed up...I messed up so much I can't even explain..." I sobbed over the sink. My tears are falling right into it and mix with the water.

"What happened? You can talk to me, you know...we're friends..." she flew behind me, I saw her reflection in the mirror.

"Four lives are on the line because of me, because...if she doesn't do it, we're all screwed..."

It's getting hard for me to see through the tears.

"Don't worry, Draco...everything's gonna be fine, I'm sure..."

The only person I could cry in front of and don't have to feel weak is Myrtle. I always come here and for the six years I've been in this school, she hasn't laughed at me once.

"Someone's coming!" She shouted after a while but she didn't have to - I heard the footsteps, too. I'm sure it's just some first year girl who doesn't know this bathroom is abandoned...

I didn't bother looking, after all, I'm still crying and my eyes surely look red and swollen. I turned on the water and splashed some on my face to wake me up. I grunted because it's so cold, but that's just what I needed.

"Oh no...no DON'T!" Shouted Myrtle with fear in her voice and screamed.

"Sectumsempra!"

I tried to quickly turn away to see who's there, when all of sudden, blood spurted out of my stomach, my face and my whole body.

For a minute, I was standing there in a complete shock, wondering what happened to me and why I can't move. Then the pain came, and it was unbearable. I painfully grunted and collapsed onto the floor, that was disgustingly wet and splashed.

I remember my body shaking and twisting in pain, I remember being incapable of doing anything. What a stupid way to die, I thought. In the girls bathroom, killed by some fucker who doesn't know what spells they're using. Maybe I'll be a ghost just like Myrtle and then we'll live there together. I'll be forever young. Chloé could meet me there...

Chloé.

What's the last thing I told her? I don't remember, but I hope it's not some stupidity. I want her to remember me, but it grieve over me for her whole life. That's too selfish to ask. She deserves better life than that, she deserves a great husband who will love her, just as I love her.

Am I gonna see her ever again?

If I won't make it into a ghost, what will happen to me?

I don't wanna die, not just yet.

I don't feel the pain anymore, that's good, I guess.

"Potter!" Screamed a deep voice. How come I can still hear?

So is it Potter who killed me? Him? After all this time? We were enemies, but I've never even thought of killing him. I didn't want him dead. I couldn't care less.

If it's really him, I hope he suffers. I hope he'll never get to know the love of his life, I hope he'll never feel complete.

"Move!" Shouted the man with the deep voice again. Could it be Snape?

I can't see anymore, just hear.

Snape casted some unknown spell and I waited for what's about to come.

So I'm not dead and I won't be, right?

I'll see Chloé, I'll tell her how much I love her.

But before I do that, I'm gonna have to rest, because the whole world is falling on me, I think I'm about to faint...