thirty five

Ariana's eyes locked on his, cutting through his easy confidence. She wasn't here for games, and Negan could sense it. Her expression alone made it clear, she wanted the truth, not one of his charmingly deflective answers.

Negan let out a low, exasperated chuckle, raising his brows. "You want the truth? Or the pretty, wrapped-up version?"

Ariana didn't even realise she'd rolled her eyes until Negan caught it with a twitch of his own smile. Her impatience hung in the air between them.

Negan shifted in his seat, his expression turning more serious, though the amusement lingered in his tone. "Well, Spencer's dead." He said, almost too casually. "And don't act like you're gonna lose sleep over that. You know he was a spineless, small-dick prick, right?"

Ariana bit down on her lower lip, holding back the immediate protest. "Of course I know. He is a total dickhead." She admitted with a sigh. "But did he really deserve to die for it?"

Negan barked out a laugh, the sound sharp and unbothered. "Oh, he absolutely did. Tried to weasel his way into leadership by telling me he's better suited for the job than Rick. Hell, he wanted me to kill Rick and hand him the keys to the kingdom."

Ariana groaned softly, rubbing her temples. "He's such a wanker." She muttered under her breath. "But still, the principle, Negan. Killing him?"

"Principle?" Negan interrupted with a raised brow. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as his gaze bore into hers. "Doll, in this world, principles are a luxury. You either lead, or you get led. And if you try to play the game without any skin in it? You get taken out."

Ariana sighed heavily, slumping back into her chair. She knew he had a point, but it didn't make it any easier to accept.

Negan sat down again across from her, eyes softer. "So, what's really goin' on in that head of yours?" His voice had lost some of its edge, shifting to something more genuine. "Because I know you well enough now to know that there's more."

Ariana's eyes fell to the table, her fingers tracing idle patterns on the surface. "Alexandria."

Negan's posture shifted slightly. "Alexandria." He repeated, voice low but watchful. "What about it?"

She lifted her gaze, meeting his eyes again, and this time there was a flicker of vulnerability. "I never really fit in with Alexandria." She admitted quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Negan didn't say anything at first. He just sat there, waiting for her to continue, knowing that there was more she needed to get off her chest. Ariana looked at him, her eyes troubled, her emotions swirling inside her like a storm she couldn't control.

"I tried." She said, her voice wavering. "I really tried to be one of them. To be part of that community. But... it always felt like I was on the outside, looking in. Like no matter what I did, I could never be what they needed me to be."

Negan's gaze softened, just a fraction, though his posture remained casual, almost indifferent. "Is that why you've never actually tried to leave?"He asked, his voice low and steady. "Because you didn't fit in with Rick and his merry band of misfits?"

Ariana bit her lip, fighting the lump in her throat. "The only person I had was Michonne. But then her and Rick became a thing... and I started to lose her. But being here... with you... it's the first time I've felt like maybe I could belong somewhere. Like I didn't have to pretend to be someone I'm not."

"And that makes you feel bad, doesn't it?" Negan asked, his voice a little more gentle than usual, though still laced with that familiar edge.

Ariana nodded, her eyes meeting his as a wave of guilt washed over her. "It does." She admitted. "I hate that I feel more at home here, with you, than I ever did in Alexandria. Those people trusted me, and now I'm... I'm just here. Like I've turned my back on them."

Negan pushed off the chair, taking a step closer to her. His hand reached out, gently tipping her chin up so she had to look at him. "You didn't turn your back on them, doll." He said, his voice rough but sincere. "You chose survival. You chose to live. That's not something you should feel bad about."

Ariana's heart twisted at his words. She wanted to believe him, wanted to take comfort in what he was saying, but the guilt still clung to her, refusing to let go.

"But I left them." She whispered. "I left them behind, and now I'm here with you, and... and it's like I'm betraying everything I thought I stood for."

Negan's thumb brushed against her jaw, the touch sending a shiver through her.

"Maybe you're just realising that what you stood for wasn't all it was cracked up to be." He murmured, his gaze locking onto hers. "Maybe you're figuring out that this world isn't about ideals or communities or any of that crap. It's about finding something that keeps you alive. Something real."

Ariana swallowed hard, her chest tightening as his words hit closer to home than she wanted to admit.

"And what about you?" She asked, her voice shaking slightly. "Is this... us... real? Or am I just another part of your game?"

Negan's smirk softened, and for a moment, the mask he wore slipped, revealing something raw and vulnerable beneath.

"You think this is a game to me?" He asked, his voice low and intense. "You're not just some pawn, Ariana. You never were. You've always been more than that."

Ariana's breath caught in her throat, the weight of his words sinking in. She didn't know what to say, didn't know how to process the confusing mix of emotions swirling inside her. All she knew was that being with Negan, despite everything, made her feel something she hadn't felt in a long time, something she hadn't felt in Alexandria.

"I don't know what I'm doing." She confessed, her voice barely a whisper. "I don't know how I ended up here, with you. But I can't deny that... that being with you feels like the most real thing I've had in a long time."

Negan's eyes darkened, his grip on her tightening just slightly as he pulled her closer.

"Then stop fighting it, doll." He murmured, his voice rough with emotion. "Stop fighting what we have. You belong here with me. You belong with me."

Ariana jolted forward, grabbing Negan's head and bringing him in to kiss her, making them smile into it. As they pulled away, Negan stood Ariana up, holding her hand as he walked her back to his bed.

"I think it's time we make the most of this morning, don't you?"

He captured Ariana's lips again for a lingering kiss. They both fell to the bed as their bodies intertwined, their love for each other consuming them, their connection growing stronger with every moment that they shared.

They kissed deeply, Negan's hands tangling in her hair as he held her close, his hips involuntary grinding against her core. She moaned as she rocked her waist back and forth against him, enjoying the way that he hardened beneath her.

"That's my girl." Negan cooed, knowing all the right buttons to press.

Ariana grabbed both of his wrists, pinning them above his head and smiling at the lack of restraint.

"What are you doing, angel?" Negan purred, leaving sloppy kisses against her neck.

"Showing you who's boss." Ariana smiled, biting her lip.

She kissed him again, biting at his bottom lip as she sat on top of him, bouncing up and down on his lap. Holding his arms above his head, refusing to let him touch her. It wasn't long before he began whining and wiggling in protest.

"Baby." He begged, lightly pushing against her hands."Baby, please."

"Please what?" Ariana asked breathlessly, lowering her waist and rocking into him.

"Please let me touch you." He exhaled sharply.

Releasing his wrists, she squealed loudly in surprise as he flipped her over onto her back almost instantly, his fingers slipping along her thighs to reach under and tug her underwear down. All in one swift motion.

"That was impressive." She giggled.

He laughed, placing her panties between his teeth for a moment and drawing breath from her lungs as his hand found where she needed him the most. Negan's fingers worked their magic, circling and teasing her clit until she was writhing with pleasure.

He slipped a finger inside her, then two, curling them upwards to hit that spot that made her moan louder. Ariana's legs trembled as Negan brought her closer and closer to the edge. She felt herself on the brink of an orgasm, her breath coming in short, sharp gasps.

Just as she was about to tip over the edge, Negan pulled away, leaving her panting and desperate for more.

"Not yet, sweetheart." He said, his voice low and commanding. "I want to make this last."

Ariana whimpered, her body begging for release. Negan chuckled and took off the rest of his clothes. He ran his fingers down her body and teased her nipples through her shirt.

Ariana sat up removed her shirt and slid her panties down, her wet pussy grinding against his hard cock. Negan let out a low growl as he felt her warmth. He grabbed her bum, guiding her so she could sit on his dick.

Ariana let out a loud moan as she felt him enter her. She started to ride him, her breasts bouncing in front of his face. Negan couldn't help but reach up and grab them, squeezing them roughly. Ariana let out another moan, throwing her head back in pleasure.

Negan groaned as he felt her pussy clenching around his dick, her orgasm building. He couldn't help but watch her as his cum began to fill her, whilst she entered her orgasm at the exact same time.

"Jesus..." Negan gasped, his voice heavy with emotion as he chuckled softly, pressing gentle kisses down Ariana's neck. He nuzzled his nose against her skin, savoring the warmth and intoxicating scent that enveloped him.

"You're everything to me. You're my fucking world, baby." Negan whispered, his voice gravelly yet softened by an unfamiliar tenderness. His words carried a raw honesty, a depth of emotion that filled the air around them, pressing into Ariana like a weight she hadn't realized she needed. "I love you. I fucking adore you."

Ariana's heart stuttered, overwhelmed by the magnitude of his confession. She could feel the truth in his words, the vulnerability in his voice, so uncharacteristic of him that it sent a shiver down her spine. But still, she couldn't resist one last playful tease, even as her breath hitched in her throat.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" She murmured, her lips curling into a small, teasing smile.

Negan's grin widened, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he let out a low chuckle.

"Don't push it, doll. I'm not makin' a habit of it." He warned, though his eyes betrayed the affection behind his words.

Without another word, Ariana climbed off him, her body sliding against his as she shifted to fall onto his chest, their legs tangling together beneath the sheets. Her head rested on his shoulder, and as she stared up into his eyes, she felt the world outside their room disappear. It was just them, wrapped in the quiet intimacy of the moment, the connection between them stronger than ever.

They lay there for a while, neither of them speaking. Ariana's fingers trailed lightly across his chest, tracing the lines of his tattoos, the heat of his skin warming her palm. She could feel his heart beating steadily beneath her touch, a constant reminder of the man who, despite everything, had become her anchor in this twisted world.

Negan's hand found its way to the small of her back, his fingers splaying out as he held her close, his grip possessive yet tender. His gaze never left hers, his eyes dark with a mixture of desire and love.

"You know..." She said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't think this would happen. Us, I mean. Not like this."

Negan raised an eyebrow, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. "What, you thought you could resist me forever?" He teased, though his voice held a warmth that belied his usual arrogance.

Ariana laughed, her breath fanning across his chest as she shook her head. "I'm serious, Negan. I didn't think you'd ever... care. Not like this."

His smirk faltered slightly, and for a moment, something flickered in his eyes. He lifted his hand, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face, his thumb lingering against her cheek.

"I didn't think I would either." He admitted quietly, his voice rough with sincerity. "But then you came along and fucked everything up."

Ariana grinned, her eyes twinkling with amusement. "Oh, so this is my fault now?"

Negan chuckled, his hand sliding down to rest on her waist. "Damn right it is. You're under my skin, girl. And I don't even wanna shake you off." He paused, his gaze growing more intense as he studied her face. "You changed everything for me."

Her heart swelled at his words, the weight of them settling deep within her. She could see the truth in his eyes, the sincerity in the way he held her, as if he couldn't bear to let her go. It was so unlike the man she had first known, the man who had swaggered into her life with his cocky grin and unshakable bravado.

"I love you too, Negan." She whispered, her voice soft but firm. "All of you. Even the parts that drive me fucking crazy."

Negan's grin returned, slow and lazy as he leaned down to kiss her, his lips brushing against hers in a way that was both possessive and gentle.

"You better." He murmured against her mouth. "Because I'm not lettin' you go, doll. Not now, not ever."

Ariana's heart raced as his words sank in, her body melting into his as he deepened the kiss, pulling her closer until there was no space left between them.

"I wouldn't want you to." She breathed, her fingers threading through his hair as she kissed him back, her body igniting under his touch.

They stayed like that for a while, wrapped in each other's arms, their breathing slow and steady as they basked in the quiet intimacy of the moment. There were no more words needed, everything they felt, everything they wanted, was clear in the way they held onto each other, as if the world outside their room didn't exist.

Negan's fingers traced lazy patterns on her back as he finally pulled away, his forehead resting against hers. His eyes, usually so hard and calculating, were soft as he looked at her, the walls he had built around himself crumbling in her presence.

"You're mine, Ariana." He whispered, his voice rough with emotion. "And I'm yours. Always."

Ariana's heart swelled, a soft smile playing on her lips as she gazed up at him. "Always." She echoed, her voice full of promise.

Negan smirked, his usual swagger returning as he pulled her tighter against him. "Good. Now shut the fuck up and kiss me again."

Ariana laughed, her fingers curling into the front of his shirt as she pressed her lips to his, losing herself in the feel of him, the taste of him, knowing that, for now, they were all that mattered.