Chapter 12

It was a quick trip to the competition, which began with master classes, which was the part that I was most excited for. Even the Senior ballet classes weren't a huge challenge, and I was always eager to meet new people in the dance world. The ages were from 9-20, and I was classified in the Junior category, so I joined with that age group at the start of the competition. Aunt Melissa drove me and wished me luck, with Melody coming along to watch the proceedings, and Brooke called (along with the rest of the Junior Elite Team and Killian) before the classes began.

"You're new," an Asian-American girl said to me when I joined the group. "I'm Grace, from the Pittsburgh Ballet House, what's your name?"

"This is my first YAGP competition," I agreed. "I'm Joanne, from the Abby Lee Dance Company."

"I've definitely seen you at competitions, then. I didn't know that studio produced ballerinas," Grace said, and I smiled wryly.

"It doesn't, I have a private teacher. It's really exciting to be here, though, for the classes and the competition."

We had to stop talking as the classes were starting. I was in love right away, as the Juniors were en pointe and it was a super challenging class. My muscles ached by the end of the day, but I didn't get called out for being particularly great or bad, which was my goal. I was at a hotel near the competition and went to sleep right away, waking up early and excitedly the next day, which was competition day for both pieces. I had laid out my costumes the night before; a bejeweled gray bodice and tutu with matching tights for my Classical piece, and a black top and flowy pants for my Contemporary piece. I would have my hair up in a simple bun for both dances.

Somehow, even though I was on my own backstage (with my family in the audience), I wasn't that nervous. Chloé had qualified as well, something that the show didn't want to mention, a huge accomplishment for her. Grace and a few others, Alston, Hannah and Sabrina, and I chatted a bit as one by one we performed our Classical routines. I watched all three do amazing, then a few dancers after Sabrina, it was my turn. I put a confident smile on my face and walked on my toes onto the stage, holding the fan that went with the variation. Normally the costume was a red dress, but I'd gone with the gray instead as my hair did not go well with anything pink or red.

The only thing that could have been better was my face- it was entertaining but a little wooden, as the piece had a lot of fast footwork and leaps. I was stable, and strong, and made sure to finish every movement. Applause greeted me when I finished, a bit out of breath, and I entered the wings still in character.

"You're doing Kitri's Entrance? No way," Grace breathed at me in the wings. "That is so hard."

I inclined my head wryly. "It was a lot of work to get it that good. You were amazing."

I grabbed food and water and watched the rest of the performances, changing into regular clothes before awards. The Pre-Competitive category was up first, full of very good 9-11-year-old's, and I clapped them on as the top 3 among the girls and top 12 overall were announced. Chloé, amazingly, placed sixth at just nine years of age. Without proper ballet training! Then, it was my category. I didn't make the top 3 girls, which was completely expected, but I got a bit discouraged when places 12-6 were called and I wasn't one of them. Sabrina placed 12th, happily for her, and Alston was 6th.

"Placing 5th, age 12 from the Abby Lee Dance Company in Pittsburgh, is Joanne Ziegler!"

"That's you!" Hannah told me when I didn't react right away. That's when I realized that they'd called my name. I stood as gracefully as possible, tears filling my eyes, chest tightening with surprise. I received my plaque and the congratulations of those that placed behind me.

I was too overwhelmed to do more than clap as Grace finished fourth. Chloé came up and hugged me tightly when awards were done.

"Fifth!"

"Sixth!" I returned just as enthusiastically. "You killed it. Good luck at the competition tomorrow- you're an amazing dancer, don't let Abby or the producers or anyone get to you."

Chloé grinned, in tears as well. We headed out to the audience, where Aunt Melissa, Christi, Chloé's sister Clara, Holly, Nia, Maddie and Kenzie congratulated both of us warmly.

"You're both incredible," Aunt Melissa told us. "And Joanne, if you can do that well in Classical, imagine how you'll do in Contemporary!"

"I'm not trying to put pressure on myself," I told my aunt. "Can we get dinner now?"

"I'm starving," Chloé put in to her mother.

Dinner was lovely, and I was up early the next morning to attend a few master classes while the ensembles performed. There were less people in these, and more scrutiny from the teachers. Hannah wasn't a part of an ensemble so we were next to each other. The first class of the day was technique, taught by Natalia Ostipova. She stopped by me while we were doing pliés, giving me a small smile.

"Ah, miss Ziegler. I enjoyed your performance yesterday. You could have placed higher if you hadn't let your face fall into a serene smile, but it's good to have room for improvement."

"Thank you, ma'am," I replied, blushing madly. I had to tell Melody and Chloé (who was at the competition with the rest of the Junior Elite Team) about this.

"That is so cool!" Hannah hissed at my back once Mrs. Ostipova had left. "You're, like, famous!"

"She's the famous one," I deflected lightly, trying not to attract attention.

This failed pretty miserably when I was one of three chosen to show the combination at the end, and Ms. Ostipova praised each of us individually.

"Technically excellent, and you have great height on your leaps. You are clearly quite flexible." "My best friend and I do Acrobatic duets so she pushes me," I explained. Ms. Ostipova nodded. "Watch for tension in your shoulders when you turn. That is all."

Soon enough, it was competition time. Nyssa couldn't make it, but I knew that my family was there (or at least Melody and Aunt Melissa), so I marked my dance once I got dressed. As the Pre-Competitive category didn't have Contemporary, I was on in just an hour as opposed to four. This dance immediately made me somber, as it was a purposeful way to trigger bad memories. Sometimes facing your trauma was a way to move past it, or so my therapist said. In any case, it made the dance more powerful to watch.

There was no name announcement, just my number, and I had to be a lot more than just a number. I walked onstage and went up on my toes, arms behind me and hands clasped together, then the music started. I poured everything that I had into the dance, hitting every sharp, odd accent and extending all of my lines. The hardest bit was ten pirouettes into an illusion, right to the floor like a doll with its strings cut. The trick was to make it not look like I had fallen by accident, and I think that I did so. By the end I was close to sobbing, and finished in the same position as I started.

Grace hugged me as I got offstage, very close to fully breaking down. "Joanne... no one's beating that, that was... are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, I will be, I just have a lot of emotions around this dance," I responded softly. "Thank you and good luck."

I spent a good half an hour calming down, then grabbed food and went to the audience as there were still many dances to go. I enjoyed every one in a different way, and my new friends did fabulously well.

"I wouldn't want to be a judge for this. Other than putting you first," Aunt Melissa told me playfully. Melody had been holding me tightly for the past hour.

"Yeah, right. I do have a chance, though," I admitted.

What seemed like ages later, awards began. They started with the top three in Contemporary, with Peter Weil in third place and Larisa Nugent in second. I was sure then that I hadn't achieved that goal, as they had been outstanding.

"In first place, from the Abby Lee Dance Company in Pittsburgh, age 12, it's Joanne Ziegler!"

"What?" I stood, shocked and delighted, hearing my aunt and sister's cheers in the audience. The three of us posed for a photo and then sat back down for the overall top 12. It went 12, 11, 10... all the way down to 2nd place, with Alston getting called as 7th. I realized then that I'd won, even before the announcer said my name. I felt like I was floating, dreaming, and I wanted to scream, but kept it to a smile and graceful acceptance.

"We have two Outstanding Choreography Awards. The first goes to Peter LeBreton Merz, and the second goes to Joanne Ziegler and Nyssa Kane.

I accepted that one too, eyes widening. What was even happening?

"Our YAGP Final pick for the Senior age group is Pheobe Gavula from the Metropolitan Ballet Academy!"

I clapped on the delighted teenager, waiting for the Junior age group. Maybe this could happen for me.

"Our YAGP Final pick for the Junior age group is Joanne Ziegler from the Abby Lee Dance Company!"

The tears came then, this time of pure joy. I jumped up, letting the moment wash over me. It was everything I'd ever dreamed of, already.

Melody attacked me in a hug the moment she could. "I am so, so proud of you. You deserve it," she whispered in my ear, then pulled away, eyes glinting playfully. "But you'd better pay for my ticket for the Final."

I laughed, wiping away a few tears. "Fair enough."