Part 7

You and Bucky sit on the sofa, your head pillowed on his chest as something mindless plays on the TV. You're dozing, curled up against him like a child, your fingers tangled in his loose t shirt. Bucky doesn't mind, he likes this, it feels normal. He's not even watching whatever obnoxious show is on, his hand is propped on his fist, his fingers caressing through your long hair.

He shouldn't have slept with you.

He likes you, you're a good person from what he can see, and he's always an excellent judge of character. You try hard, you've just had a rough go at life to begin with. He finds it almost comical you'd been as worried about hurting him as he had you, but in the long run both of you are fine.

Well, mostly.

He glances at your hips, at the skin that shows between your t shirt and your sweat pants. He can see the bruises there in the shape of fingerprints, the worst of them from his metal grip. You don't seem to mind, but he doesn't like hurting you, it bothers him. Women shouldn't have bruises on their skin.

His mind is drawn to that boyfriend --- ex boyfriend --- of yours, the way you'd acted around him. Had he hurt you in the past, done something that made you so frightened of him? Bucky has no intentions of you ever being around the man again, not without his skull being crushed between the super soldiers hands.

No one's going to hurt you anymore.

You mutter in your sleep, snuggling your face beneath his jaw with a content sigh. Bucky smiles, glancing down at you. You sleep about as much as he does, so he doesn't want to wake you at all, despite it's growing late.

Yesterday had been wonderful, the night you'd spent together one of his best memories. The fact you'd come with him to his apartment instead of staying in your own told him you didn't want to be away from him, and that makes a warmth settle in his chest. He really will do everything within his power to take care of you, shield you from the monsters that made him into what he is.

He won't let that happen to you.

The Avengers never should have recruited you.

He hesitates as he hears someone at this door, the pattern of the knocking letting him know immediately that it's Steve. He tenses, glancing down at you before back at the door. Steve will just walk in if he doesn't answer, and Bucky knows how much you probably wouldn't want the fact you slept together getting out.

You're a very private person.

He shifts gingerly, so easily that you hardly notice him slipping a pillow beneath your head, leaving you alone on the sofa. He walks quickly the door, hesitating as his hand closes around the knob.

This might be uncomfortable.

He opens the door just enough where he can fit his frame through it, but not where Steve can see the living room behind him.

"Hey." Steve frowns at his friend, eyes immediately dissecting his appearance. "I've been calling you, we have a meeting in fifteen minutes upstairs. Stark wants to..." he trails off, seeing the nervous look on Bucky's face, the way he stands so tensely. "What's going on?"

"What?"

"Something's wrong." Steve can tell instantly; he's been friends with Bucky too long not to be able to notice. "What's happened?"

"Nothing." Bucky frowns, just looking at Steve. His training kicks in, the instincts that were literally beat into him taking over. "Just tired. What does Stark want?"

"To discuss how to handle Hydra."

"Why do we need to discuss that? I thought he finished up his rant at the last meeting," Bucky sighs, it all that he can do not to turn around and look at you, make sure you're still asleep. "Why again?"

"He's worried, especially after they attacked us at the last mission. He doesn't even want any of us leaving the city."

"Who made him the boss?"

"I've been asking myself the same thing. You coming?"

"I'll meet you there," Bucky grimaces; he's not looking forward to another meeting.

"Alright, don't be late."

Bucky nods, and he slowly closes the door in Steve's suspicious face, making sure to shut it firmly with a flick of the lock. He runs his hands through his hair in aggravation, turning to look back at your sleeping form.

He doesn't want to return to reality, for the soft moment you two are sharing to end. He wants to keep pretending that everything is fine, that you two are just normal friends, watching TV and not on the brink of losing your lives to a world dominating organization.

He scowls, gazing at you. You've curled yourself up around the pillow, and you're sound asleep, completely relaxed for the first time in months. He hates to wake you, you don't look like you're moving any time soon.

He'll just let you rest, go on up to the meeting, pretend he doesn't know where you are if anyone asks. You're safe in Stark Tower, Hydra hasn't come after you yet, after all. He knows they have to know what you can do now, how strong your telekinetic powers are; you'd stopped an alien space ship completely on your own, that says a lot.

It's worrisome.

They'll be gunning for you hard now.

Bucky chews his lower lip between his teeth, just standing there, lost in thought. He'd kill them all, viciously, if they tried to take you. You're one of the few good things left in this shit world, and he doesn't intend on letting them ruin you.

He won't let that happen.

~~~~~~~~

Bucky steps into your apartment after knocking almost awkwardly. You'd not been on the couch when he'd come back from the meeting, so he'd thought you might be back in your place. .

The moment he opens the door, he can smell the food you're cooking, and his mouth begins to water.

"Is that lasagna?" He asks as he closes the door, the orange kitten you're housing immediately barreling towards him. He leans down, letting the fur ball latch onto him as he straightens, sitting it on his shoulder as he moves to the kitchen.

You flush as you turn from the counter, a white apron tied around your waist. You nod, your finger in your mouth as you taste the icing for the cake you're making.

"Maybe."

"Lasagna and a cake?"

"You always have to have dessert."

"I thought I already had."

Your entire face goes red as Bucky grins at you, leaning his hip against the kitchen table.

"Smooth, Barnes." You mumble, embarrassed. He chuckles, lifting up the kitten as it mews and setting it on the table, watching you turn back to your icing. The round cake is already done, sitting on a tier as you begin to ice it.

He watches you work, how smooth and easy your movements are. The tier begins to slowly spin, strands of your long hair caressing your cheeks as you concentrate. You use your power as a second nature, he doubts you even notice what you're doing.

It must be nice for you in the tower, being able to use your power so freely and without worry of anyone gasping in alarm. He figures you've had to hide it all these years, just like everyone else, because the general public would be afraid of you.

Well, considering what you did to that alien ship, they should be.

"The lasagna should be done in another thirty minutes." You say after a moment, offering him the spoon as you finish with the white icing. "You and Toby are eating with me, right?"

"Toby?" Bucky takes the spoon, finding it's the best cream cheese icing he's ever tasted.

"The kitten. I named him Toby."

"Huh." Bucky lightly runs his fingers along the kittens back, the purring starting up immediately before it flops over and rolls, all four legs rising to clamp around the metal hand.

"Do you not like it?"

"I thought maybe Devil would be a better name."

You smile. "He's just mischievous. He has a lot of energy."

"He's a vicious beast."

"So he'll fit in perfectly here."

Bucky doesn't disagree. He watches as you wash up some of your dishes, the sink turning off on its own, the soap rag rising and cleaning off the utensils without you even looking up from the water.

You have complete control over yourself and your power, able to use it while you're doing something else. You don't have to focus entirely on it at all, and... well, it's impressive.

If Hydra knew how powerful you were, they would have snatched you up ages ago. It worries Bucky about your ex being with them, what he might say, what he knows.

He needs to talk to you about it.

"Why such a serious face?" You ask after a moment, glancing over your shoulder to see him lost in thought, the kitten gnawing on his metal fingers. You don't like it when he's quiet, he might be over thinking and that never ends well.

"I just... we need to talk about the other day."

You tense immediately, your hands pausing in the soapy dish water. "You mean last night?"

"No. About what happened with your ex." Bucky isn't going to let you distract him, he's a trained interrogator, after all. He'd given in to you before, but now it's time to be serious. "What does he know about you that he can tell hydra?"

You exhale heavily, blowing strands of hair away from your face. You wash the soap from your hands and dry them on a towel, irritated; you'd been hoping to avoid this conversation.

"He doesn't know anything about me anymore." You state, turning to face him completely, letting the dishes finish themselves behind you. "We were kids before."

"But he knows you. Hydra will use anything to their advantage. What does he know that they can use against you?"

You don't like this side of Bucky Barnes, all solemn and dark gazed. His arms are crossed over his chest, and the way he's looking at you --- you're not weaseling your way out of this conversation.

You sigh.

You're not one for speaking about your past, you always try to forget about it when you move on. But, you suppose, the soldier has a point. Cody has a tendency to run his mouth, so he'll blurt out everything he can think of.

You should just... tell Bucky.

He, at least, is someone you can trust, even if you learn to regret it.

You cast a look at the stove in resignation before moving to the table, sitting down with a sigh. Bucky follows suit, taking the chair across from you, letting the kitten crawl up his arm and to his shoulder once more.

"How did you meet him?" Bucky asks, scratching the kittens chin as you lean back in your chair, frowning.

"We were in the same foster home in the city. My parents died in a house fire when I was a kid, so I was put in the system. I caught him lighting a cigarette without a lighter."

"So he has control over fire then."

"Yeah. We were both freaks, so we got close." You shrug your shoulders, not really wanting to go into details; you'd hated your life back then so badly, you'd hated your foster parents, where you lived, the world --- Cody was the only person who could make you smile in those days. "We ran away, got jobs, made it work. We were doing fine until he got a loan from some bad people. He couldn't pay it back quick enough, so he tried to rob a place and got caught. He went to prison, they came after me for the money, so I split."

"Hydra got him out of prison then."

"Yup." You pick at the table. "Looks that way."

"So what does he know about you? Strengths? Weaknesses? What you're afraid of, what you have nightmares about --- these are what they will want to know."

You prop your chin on your hand, gazing at him. "I feel like I'm filling out a card for backward speed dating. You want to know my hobbies too?"

"(Y/N), I'm serious. They'll use it against you, and I can't protect you if I don't know their weapon of choice."

For fucks sake.

You give an aggravated sigh as you lean back, looking at him for several seconds.

"I'm afraid of fire."

Bucky frowns. "Because of your parents."

"Yeah." You rub the back of your neck. You'd been there, when something electrical had gone wrong, sent your home up in flames. You can remember your mother rushing to get you out of bed, smoke making your eyes and lungs burn. She'd shoved you out the second story window into the firefighters arms below --- the fact he caught you was a miracle.

Neither of your parents ever came out. You don't know if your mother passed out from the smoke, if they both burned alive --- you've never wanted too. You were only six years old, so your memories of them are very vague.

You don't say any of that to Bucky, it's not his concern and you never told Cody any of it. It's your baggage and you intend to keep it in the past.

"What else?"

"Huh?"

"What else does he know?"

"I don't know. I mean, that was years ago and we were just kids --- I'm not the same person as I was then. I own a bakery, I bake cakes and cookies. I like to decorate them, it helps me concentrate. I can move stuff around without touching it and I've always been able to for as long as I can remember." You glance at the oven timer again. "I've changed my identity a few times, I'm not allergic to anything, and as far as I know I've never killed anyone."

You stand, the timer dinging. The oven opens, allowing the pan to come out and make its way to the counter. Bucky watches, inhaling deeply.

"Have you ever loved anyone?"

"What?" You send him a startled look, your hand hovering above a knife. What kind of question is that?

Bucky gazes at you. "Have you ever been in love?"

"... No."

"Good. If Hydra could, they'd find the person you did and use them as blackmail." He rises, oddly satisfied with your answer. He's not trying to pry into your life or drag up anything unpleasant, he just needs the answers so as to keep you safe. That's his priority now.

"Have you?" You ask after a moment, slowly slicing through your cake. "Ever been in love?"

"No." His answer is easy. "Never."

Huh.

You look down, chewing your lower lip nervously. You feel his hands slip familiarly around your hips, and you lean back into him thoughtlessly, feeling safe as he rests his chin on your shoulder.

It seems so natural, you two fit so well together. You find him just being around comforting, although you don't even realize it.

"Do you want to stay the night again?" You ask after a moment, pressing your lips against his rough cheek. "I promise I'll be nice."

He flushes, his grip on you tightening.

He likes it better when you're not.

~~~~~~~~

You wake up slowly, overly warm but relaxed. You glance up, seeing Bucky is sound asleep, but you're not surprised.

He'd worked hard last night.

Your cheeks pinken at the memory.

You'd loved how he'd just lifted you up, your legs curling around his hips as he carried you to bed. His weight on top of you felt good, his lips hungry and devouring your own --- he hadn't been shy in the least this time.

And oh, how many times he'd dedicated his mouth to making you lose control... you'd told him to stop, that something bad could happen, and he'd promptly told you that he didn't care if you brought the entire building down around him, you were going to cum.

You'd never been so hot before.

You bite your lip, lazily drawing a circle through the soft hair on his chest, your naked body curled into his. You have to shift just at the thought of him on top of you, hands bruising your hips, your nails digging into his shoulders as you lost yourself over and over --- you'd gone so long denying yourself the pleasure, afraid you'd hurt someone or break something, and yet now --- you're not afraid you'll ever hurt Bucky now.

Your head is pillowed on his shoulder, his metal arm warm as it curves around you, hand resting on your hip below the pale sheets. Toby is curled on the end of the bed, a tiny ball still snoozing.

It seems overly perfect, normal almost. Is this what everyone else does? Do they wake up with their significant other like this every day, know how lucky they are to have someone that accepts them?

You've never had this before.

You don't want to lose it. You should leave, go somewhere else, start another new life. You should leave Bucky, even the cat, abandon everything like you always do.

But you don't want too.

Maybe it won't be so bad, staying just a little while longer? After all, Hydra might chase you down the second you leave, you're safer in the tower, right?

Why are you talking yourself into staying? You know it's a Terrible idea! Bad things always happen when you stay places!

You shuffle just the slightest, sitting up slowly so you don't bother Bucky. To be an assassin, he certainly sleeps hard, as he doesn't notice you crawling out of bed and grabbing his shirt off the floor, shrugging it on. It smells like him, and he doesn't need to wear it anyway.

You pad silently out of the room, glancing out the windows to  see it's just morning, the sun rising over the skyscrapers in the distance. The city is still a wreck from the alien attack, but it's starting to get back on its feet. 

Maybe things are looking up.

~~~~~~~

"Bucky."

"Yeah?"

"Can we talk?"

Bucky glances up from where he's laying beneath his bike, frowning as he slowly pushes out from under it. The motorbike has been out of commission since the last alien attack, and he's not had any time to work on it, not being wrapped up with you.

The bike has been abandoned, and while you're preoccupied, he's finally taking the time to give it some care.

Or he thought he was.

"What about?" He rubs his hands on a towel, removing most of the oil and grease. His dark brows furrow as he sees Steve's troubled expression.

He glances around, but the two of them are completely alone, surrounded by vehicle parts and the smell of oil. The Tower garage is impressive, large and underground for the most part. There's only two entrances out, which makes it defensible if necessary; Stark really thinks ahead of the game.

"I think you know what." Steve finally says, crossing his arms as he gazes at his best friend. He's been watching you and Bucky since Natasha mentioned what Wanda had seen, and he's observed the signs.

Somehow, you've weaseled your way into Bucks affections, and who knows how much farther. Steve still doesn't trust you, he feels like his friend is being played, as if the soldier needs more emotional pain; it's fine if the two of you are just releasing some stress with each other, but anything other then that could be detrimental.

Bucky doesn't pretend he doesn't understand. "You're concerned about my relationship with (Y/N)."

"Yes. I am."

"You don't have to be."

"But I am. We don't know if we can trust her, bucky, we ---."

"For fucks sake, Steve, you're the only reason she's even involved in this mess," Bucky interrupts, scowling. "She would have been perfectly fine in her bakery if you hadn't said a Word and brought her into this. You keep saying you can't trust her, but you're not exactly giving her a chance either, are you?"

"I want too, I really do." Steve is sincere in that, his blond brows drawing together. "But there's just something --- I can't explain it, Bucky. She's not telling us everything, she's keeping secrets and that can endanger everyone here. We already know Hydra is curious about her."

"Because you involved her in the Avengers! She was completely anonymous before that!"

"She's powerful, Bucky! So you really think she wouldn't have been noticed eventually? Better now where we can keep an eye on her then out there with Hydra!"

"She would never work for them."

"She wouldn't Have a choice, just like you didn't. They'd turn her into a weapon, and one I'm not sure we'd be able to handle."

"She would never hurt any of us."

"Not intentionally. But you of all people should know better."

Bucky does know, and he knows you're also afraid. He's not going to let them get you, though, he promised he wouldn't.

"What's your point?" He looks down at the blackened rag in his hands, his chest tightening. He knows you and Steve don't like each other, everyone does, and the captains opinion of you will never change unless something drastic happens.

"My point is that I think  you should be a lot more careful with her. I'm not telling you what to do, Bucky, if you want to continue any sort of physical relationship with her fine," God knows after all this time, Bucky needs some physical attention like that, just to relieve the stress. "But don't tell her anything that can be used against you, don't relax."

It's a little late for that.

Bucky doesn't immediately say anything, frowning. Really, you don't ask him anything about his life, what happened when he was in Hydra, or even when he was a human. You've never pried, and he's never offered, so you don't know anything.

He only just managed to get you to say the bare minimum about yourself the other night. He's a little perturbed as to why, seeing as you said you're afraid of fire, you dated someone who has control over it; are you afraid because of what happened to your family, or because of something your ex did?

There's no burn scars on your body, Bucky would have definitely noticed, and what few are there are small and easily explainable.

You can tell the difference.

So, really, if you're an Hydra agent of any sort, you're quite terrible at it. Sleeping with him would be a nice touch, but you're not exactly getting any information out of him concerning himself or the other members of the Avengers.

"You can trust her, Steve, whether you want to admit it or not. She's had plenty of times to turn on us."

"Hydra doesn't always turn, they'll stay nestled exactly where they are until it's beneficial for them. Some of them are years in the making."

Bucky exhales in aggravation. Steve won't change his mind, he'll argue with a brick wall if he thinks he's right. The solder sees no point in continuing to argue with his old friend, especially since Steve only has good intentions.

He's always been that way.

"Have you mentioned your thoughts to anyone else?"

"Natasha and I've talked about it."

"She's worried too then?"

"No. She likes (Y/N) well enough. She's more concerned about the rumors of you two floating around. You spend all your time with her now."

"It's no one's business. Let them talk."

"It's everyone's business and you know it. Nothing goes on unnoticed in this place, Buck. We're all stuck here for the time being, and the tower isn't as big as everyone might think."

Right.

Bucky shakes his head, glancing at his bike. He wants to finish it before the days over, not be berated for who he chooses to spend his time with.

He understands the concern, he really does. Steve just doesn't know you, what you've been through and what's happening now. Honestly Bucky should tell him, that Hydra is actually after you, about your ex, everything.

But then you made him promise not to say a word, those soft lips of yours begging him before you kissed him.

He knows manipulation when he sees it, he knows you slept with him more to convince him to keep quiet then anything else, he's not naive or foolish.

But neither are you.

Your relationship now, well... it's not just about sex or keeping secrets, it's... a friendship. And if it's not, Hydra has trained you well enough to fool even him, and he deserves whatever pain he gets from it.

Until then, though, he's going to enjoy it.

"I understand what you're saying, if it were reversed I would be doing the same." Bucky turns away from the blond man, kneeling down to grab his wrench, preparing to begin work on the bike again. "Thanks for the concern."

"But you're not going to listen to me."

"No." Bucky says after a moment. "I'm not."

~~~~~~~

It's three am and you're sound asleep, rolled over on your side with your arms wrapped around a pillow. Your cat is curled up by your feet, his tail flipping back and forth occasionally.

Bucky lays beside you, staring at the ceiling like he has all night. He can't sleep, but that's no surprise. Usually he gets a few more hours when he's with you, but not tonight.

He's worried.

He has a bad feeling, and he doesn't know why. Things have been too calm lately, like they are just before a storm.

He looks over at you nervously, wondering what's going to happen. He doesn't want to lose you, he doesn't want to lose the feeling of how normal it feels to be with you.

You don't look at him like he's a soldier with a troubled past, you look at him like he's Bucky, a friend, a lover, someone who seriously enjoys your cooking.

Which, if he keeps eating, is going to make him have to spend more time at the gym.

Bucky grimaces, and shifts, rolling over until he's facing you. You have a tendency to like to sleep in his shirts, even if they're a little thin or tattered. He likes the color gray on you though, it compliments you.

He reaches forward, lightly brushing his fingers through your loose hair. You're wearing it down a little more often, more so for his sake then your own. You're a beautiful woman, and your off-putting attitude towards others makes him like you more.

You've been dealt a rough hand in life, but he wants it to be better for you.

He wants to keep you safe.

If Hydra comes, if they try to take you, he'll stop them. He'll kill every single agent they send, break them in half and return them to their masters in gift boxes.

He doesn't want them doing to you what happened to him.

He's not sure you'd be able to survive what they'd make you do.

His arm slips around your waist, dragging you back against him protectively as his body curves to yours. You sigh in your sleep, leaning back into him, content.

He presses his lips to your shoulder, eyes shadowing.

He'll protect you even if it costs him everything.