25-Right where we started

Hoshi's pov.

It's almost a week since a shocking event happened to my bestfriend's life. Kyeom and Joshua broke up all of a sudden. No explanation or even a clue why they did but they did. He refuses to tell me anything. Kwannie told me they found Kyeom sitting crying his eyes out in Italy on the last day. But what boggles my mind is how Kyeom didn't even change when we came back. People might not have noticed it but I do.

"Dude.. what are you waiting for?? Come on shoot the ball." Kyeom said as we played basketball. He seemed alright doing things as normal as a normal human being. And that's the weird part. I don't think Kyeom was still over Joshua. But he acts like he is. Even with me. I mean it's only been a week??

"Alright hold on." I said as I faked a dribble and shoot the ball instead.

"Okey new move. New move noted. Let's go again". He said but I was tired. He doesn't seem tired on the other hand. Where is he getting all the energy?!!

"Maybe we should take a break. We still have that play Woozi produced to go to." I said and he nodded.

"Alright then but I win this time. You owe me a soda" he said as he grabbed his things. He's smiling. He's living his life normally. But I don't see himself in his eyes anymore. I'm still concerned.

"Kyeom can I ask you a question." I finally had the courage to ask. I really wanted to ask him earlier but he doesn't stay put. He attended a marathon without us all knowing. He went to a solo trip to hike.. he's actually more busy than usual.

"Sure what's up." He asked as he drank water.

"Are you really alright? You've been very busy these past week.. and maybe you're still hurting?" i trailed off then he smiled. Not reaching his eyes again.

"I'm fine. Don't look at me like that. We broke up that's all. It's not the end of the world." He said nonchalantly and I just looked at him. Alright this is really not him right now. It feels like talking to some other guy.

"Really? Because you don't seem yourself." I honestly said.

"Dude you're overthinking. And we just dated for a really short time. I don't mind. And we should get going if we don't wanna be late to your lover's play." He said and just hearing that I feel like it should be different. He just changes the topic like this most of the time.

"You know you can talk to me about anything right?" I asked him.

"Duhzz I know that." He said and smiled. I smiled back but I was sad. My best-friend is truly hurt.

We changed our clothes and went to the theater. Jeonghan had already went to abroad so Cheol was with Mingyu this time.

"Kyeom!! Long time no see." Mingyu said and then hugged Kyeomi. He hugged gyu back and sat next to them.

"What's the name of the play?" I asked.

"Okey red flag alert. It's your boyfriend but you don't know?!?" Cheol teases me and i got embarrassed. Well actually it's a little my fault because I'm also preoccupied with my bestfriend lately.

"Don't let him hear you describe him as my boyfriend" i said to them and they just chuckled. As if both of them has a great life everyday.

"Okey both of you are relationship less right now so don't act high and mighty. Oh and the play's starting shhhhhhhhh" I said and they all looked at me.

"You're the only noisy one here." Gyu mumbled but I heard it pretty clear.

We enjoyed the show and even gave the characters a round of applause. They deserve the praise because they did pretty well.

I glanced beside me and look at Kyeom just to see him spacing out again. He does this a lot nowadays. He just seemed lost and I tapped him to bring him back to earth.

"Oh sorry I was just thinking about something. Where do we go next?" He asked and I literally wanted to hug this guy. He doesn't rest.

"Oh right... what happened to Joshua? Is he really gonna miss the rest of the school days?" Gyu suddenly said the forbidden name that none of us wanted to talk about. I guess he didn't get the memo. Dumb puppy. I kicked him to stop him from talking. Luckily he got the message right away.

Kyeom didn't say anything again. Just in time Wonu arrived.

"Sorry I'm late. I slept for so long and didn't notice the time." Wonu said interrupting us all.

"Dude you missed the whole thing." Kyeom said as he laughed at his friend. Obviously changing the topic I just know it.

"That's alright I still support Woozi." Wonu said and I just shook my head in shock.

"Min let's go grab something to eat first." Wonu said and I just rolled my eyes. They are flaunting their relationship in front of us again.

"Sure thing love." He said and Wonu glared at him. Gyu just raised his hands in surrender and they went out. It was just cheol, Kyeom and me now waiting for Woozi to come out from the back.

"So how was it?" He asked.

"It was perfect as always." I said and he looked at me.

"Not valid if it come from you. You like me, stop being biased." He said and I just smiled. Okey so now he acknowledged it without being awkward about it. At least we have progress right?

"It's nice. The plot was concerning but really great." Cheol said.

"I liked it.. but you know what I would really like?!?" Kyeom suddenly said and we all looked at him.

"What?" We all said because he was waiting for us to literally ask like an idiot. If he didn't just got his heart broken I would have choked him right now.

"Go party!" He said and we all look at each other.

"Dude. Aren't you tired already? You just got back from a trip?" Cheol commented and I kicked him. He looked at me and instantly got what I was looking at him for.

"Sure where?" I asked. I'm not a bad friend, if my bestfriend thinks he needs this.. i will do it right away.

"Uhmmmm how about GORGEOUZ? I heard it awhile back.. I'm not exactly sure from who but i remember them saying it was like a fever dream" he said and we looked at him weirdly.

"I'll pass. My back is already killing me. I'm gonna go rest. Hoshi and Cheol will come with you. Right guys?" Woozi said to both of us with a threatening glare as you can imagine. Kyeom just smiled at us excitedly waiting for us to agree.

"Sure then... i guess we are gonna be drinking tonight." Cheol said as he updated his Jeonghan with a picture of us. It's nice to see that he is still very dedicated with his boyfriend despite him literally replying only 1 or 2x a week because of how strict the place was.

"I'll go text Dino if he wants to come." Kyeom suddenly said and I laughed.

"Oh right, you were on a trip. Dino's having a date right now. To Claudia... you know.. Auntie's daughter from italiaaa. She's on a trip right now and you know your brother's pretty aggressive." I said while laughing.

"What?!? When did this happen??" He said in shock and I was not about to say that it happened when he was on his mourning period so I just laughed.

"Just text the lovebirds that just left a while ago. And Vernon and his loud boyfriend as well." Cheol said to Kyeom and he did.

"I'm pretty sure they are down." I said as we all went out on our way to Kyeom's house. His mother was back too since the incident and she's probably concerned about her son too. But luckily, she doesn't go without any plan at all.

————- in Kyeom's house ————

"IS EVERYONE READYYY?!?!?" I said to all of them as I opened the door to their house. What? I have their spare keys.

"Dude you're early." Kyeom said as he went down while eating a bowl of popcorn.

"What?! I thought we were gonna PARTEY!" I asked him trying to hype him up. Seriously isn't he the one that has the idea before?!? Why am I the excited one seriously.

Then all of a sudden the door flew open again.

"ANYONE WANNA START THE SHOTS!!!?!?" Seungkwan said as Vernon held the door for him.

"Woah another great entrance I'll give it like a 7/10." Kyeom joked and I laughed.

"What? Did someone do an entrance before me?!?!?" seungkwan asked and Kyeom and I just nodded.

"A little too late to be first." Hoshi said as he flaunted his outfit.

"Whatever Vernon carry me to the couch." He said and his boyfriend without even thinking also literally carried him and they sat together. Wow it's concerning that Vernon never got tired of his antics.

"Alright then.. I'm just gonna get ready at this point because you guys are already here." Kyeom said to us as he ran to his room and changed. I followed him to his room and then I was shocked at the state of it. Not as a nest freak but actually as a person. This place is nowhere near his place last time.

"Woah! What happened here?" I asked.

"What? Oh that. Sorry.. I haven't had the time to take care of the mess. Just move some of the mess out of the bed." He said and I looked at his bed.

"What bed?!?" I asked in shock because there are clothes everywhere. Some trash and even empty cans of soda. Literally trash. His room is trash.

"Just move some stuff to the couch" he said with a little annoyance in his voice.

"SERIOUSLY DUDE WHAT COUCH?" I asked him again.

"Come on go out if you're gonna judge my room." He said and I looked at him. He totally needs help. I don't think this is how anyone should live.

He opened his closet and it was even more messy than the room itself. I don't even know if he bothered folding them. It looked like he just shove them all together in the closet.

"Seriously dude. This is not normal." I said to him and he glared at me.

"Shut up and let's go." He said as he finally finished rummaging through his clothes. He grabbed his cap and went out the room. I followed behind him and as soon as we were at the living room, the door flew open once again. Familiar.....

"EVERYONE SHUT UP! The KING IS HERE!" Cheol said as he opened the door holding to a bottle of whiskey. What the hell? Gyu and Wonu were behind him, they probably opened the door for him.

"Dude did you drink before us all?" I said and he laughed.

"Ofcourse not! I was just hyping you guys up!" He said and I rolled my eyes.

"Perfect! Let's go." Kyeom said and then all of us stood up and prepared.

And so we went to the club. I was very adamant to leave Woozi alone but he told he can take us all home if we texted him.

"Woah? This place is more crowded than the last time." Kyeom suddenly said as we entered the place. And indeed he was right. People were already struggling to get through.

"Maybe we should change location?" Gyu asked and I was about to ask the same thing when Wonu placed his hands on both of our shoulder.

"Our friend is already in the bar. Let's just follow that crazy guy." He said as he pointed at Kyeom sitting on the bar and talking to the bartender like a friend.

"Seriously we just got here and he's already made a friend. Who's the introvert now?" Asked Cheol.

"Alright then... my assistant chaperone job has officially started. Good luck to everyone and all see you tomorrow probably." I said and they looked at me like I was crazy.

"Why assistant?" Asked Cheol.

"Oh perfect because you're the main chaperone. I'm probably gonna pass out sooner than Kyeom so you're in charge of my phone. And his phone. I grabbed it a while ago. With magic handssss." I said but they don't seem impressed so I just went to Kyeom's place and started the ✨PARTY✨.

I can see them laughing at Cheol as I disappeared through the crowd and met with Kyeom at the bar.

"Alrightttt then... what are we having?" I asked.

"We are doing the 'MAYBE NEXT LIFE' challenge.." Kyeom said with excitement.

"Okey creepy and very weird but strangely makes me curious...." I said.

"Soo....." he said as he smiled and nodge my shoulder with his.

"Ofcourse!" Kyeom and I cheered but as soon as I shouted saw what the bartender was preparing I wish to God I didn't say yes.

The bartender started lining up the shots probably of tequila as a warm up as he narrated. WARM UP? Seriously?!??

"Alright this part is a challenge. Each of you is gonna take 10 shots and drown them all down in 20 seconds... first one to finish... get's to pick the next round." The bartender said.

"Ohhhh... Hoshi's gonna die." I could hear Wonu laughing with Vernon. Okey these guys don't have any faith in me. It's concerning.

"Min get us one round of drinks. This is gonna be fun." Wonu said and Gyu automatically agreed.

"Sure" He asked Seungkwan to go with him and they disappeared in the crowd.

"Are we doing this or what?!?" Kyeom asked and I was not about to back down from the fight! I am pretty competitive too.

"Do you know who you're talking to?" I asked as I removed my belt and made it a bandana. I could hear cheering from our friends and some unexpected audience from the crowd.

"Alright! 3... 2... 1.... START!" The bartender said and we both chugged right down our shot glasses and without any problem at all Kyeom finished first and smashed his last glass on the table.

"Easy!" He said as he wiped some of the spilled tequila on his mouth. I finished my shots and glared at my best friend.

"Ewwwww crushed by Kyeom?" Seungkwan commented on the background as he was sitting on his boyfriend's lap and eating french fries.

"Kyeom pick your poison!" The bartender said. Oh right they know each other.

"How abouttttt... something a little smooth." He said and the bartender took out a bottle of whiskey.

"6 shots each first one wins and the game continues until one of you admit defeat." Bartender added and I looked at Kyeom who looks right at me with dedication on his face.

"Ohhhhhhhhh seems a little relaxed Kyeom? Sure you'll win?" I asked trying to rile him up. I could see the effects of the first 12 shots affecting him already as he managed to sit straight.

"Oh says the loser of round one." He said and I just chuckled.

"3... 2...1... START!" The bartender said once again. This game continued and continued with Kyeom winning each round. Know why? Yup I rigged the game. I'm starting to avoid drinking since Woozi is a little off when I drink so I keep myself out even if he says it's fine. I've been drinking water and juice all evening and this guy has been drunk this whole time.

"Whyyyy... howwwwx come you're not even tipzzzzyyy???" Kyeom said as he placed his head on the counter. Of course he was gonna pass out. That was my plan all along.

"I'm gonna go head home with my friend here you guys enjoy. All on Cheol's card!" I said as I guided Kyeom outside as he placed his arms around my shoulder. He was going on and on about my traitorness, yup he's already making up words, he's that drunk.

"MY CARD?" CHeol asked in shock.

"Oh you forgot about my magic hands?!?" I said and laughed as I left.

"You're seriously dead!" He shouted but I was already outside.

"Hoshiii Hoshiii Hoshiii.... Why are you so mushyyy????" Kyeom sang and walked at the same time as he squeezed my cheeks for atleast one every block we were walking.

I wanted to sober him up a little to finally talk to him seriously. I'm afraid he can't open up when sober but can't talk if too drunk. So I'm trying to make him reach a very middle line where he's still drunk but says everything he feels and doesn't lie.

As we were walking in circles I saw a familiar face. A face I haven't seen since Italy. It was Joshua's. Kyeom was still pretty out of it but I saw what I saw and he's walking towards us. I couldn't help but look at him.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

"I wanna help." He said as he grabbed Kyeomi and placed him in his back for a piggyback ride. I was pretty silent sometime but then I wanted to know. I got curious. At the same time I don't wanna be kept in the dark like Kyeom is doing to me these days. I'm not even sure he's still my bestfriend anymore.

"You disappeared on him, and us. What's up." I said nonchalantly when I really wanted to ask why they broke up.

"Honestly, I have no idea." He said and I looked at him confused of what he just said. What the hell is wrong with this guy and he dresses differently too. He's too neat?

"No idea?!? just so you know, you left us all too without any explanation at all. Didn't you say we were friends." I asked him with a little annoyance on my voice.

"Look Hoshi.. there's been a lot on my mind right now. And I don't think I have the right to tell you what happened between Kyeom and me apparently. He can tell you when he's ready." He said but then I couldn't stopped bugging him.

"You talk like you guys don't even have a relationship or had one. You leave and you leave my best friend broken. He has never once went on a trip just himself. He even told me that being in a trip alone is not something he would do. And now he keeps to himself, that's not him and I'm pretty sure you caused that. " I said to him and he just looked at Kyeom.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean anything to happen... and to happen like this." He said in a very soft and very sad voice. He seem even more sad? or more to say it feels like he's hurt?

"Can you at least tell me why you guys broke up?" I asked one last time.

"I guess you could say... I was not the Joshua he knew? It was all my fault, he was just caught up in my messed up world" He said to me and I looked at him and Kyeom. He was pretty out of it now and I don't know if I could wake him up even more. Maybe he had too much to drink already.

"I didn't know mister perfect gentleman has a messed up world. I guess I'm not supposed to be angry with you then..." I said and he just scoffed.

"It's alright. You can blame me.... I'm just not in the right place right now. Can you just promise to tell me whatever happens to Kyeom? He's a pretty big part of my life too and I don't want him reliving the pain I gave him... that's one of the reason I am avoiding seeing him.." he said and I looked at him.

"Then why now? Why come back now?" I asked.

"I had to fix what I broke..." he said and then without me noticing I was already at Kyeom's house. We literally walked back that's crazy.

"I literally have no idea what's going on with you but can you just talk to him? I hate seeing him like this pretending to be happy but not." I said honestly.

"Sorry.. I can't. Atleast not before I could find Jo—-,." He stopped himself. And I looked at him.

"I mean not before I find the answer I am looking for." He said and I looked at him weirdly. He's so weird. Then he placed Kyeom back to my shoulder and fixed his hair a little.

"Hoshi, I know I will sound super selfish right now but can you just take care of Kyeom for me?" He asked and I laughed.

"I have been taking care of this guy since we were ten so no worries there. Am I gonna see you soon?" I had to ask.

"Hopefully..." he said and then took a deep breath . He took one last look at Kyeom and gave him a kiss on the forehead. Then he left. Just like that.

I carried my friend into his house and to the living room. I looked around and thought to myself that I need to help this guy out. He's not going through this alone. Not anymore.

He was pretty much out of it and I placed him on the couch. I removed his shoes and went to look at his room. It was a mess. I started cleaning the room and about 1 hour later, I could recognize his room now. I placed all his dirty clothes away and organized his cabinets for him. I arranged his picture frames too.

"Hoshi? What are you doing—-" I was stopped when I heard him talk behind me. I guess he's awake now.

"I wanted to help so.. I—" i was cut off by his sudden change in expression when he came inside his room.

"What—- where is everything?!? WHAT DID YOU DO?!?" He suddenly shouted. I was caught confused at the sudden increase of his voice. He's still a little drunk and an angry drunk.

"I cleaned up your room why are you shouting at me?!?" I asked him in annoyance.

"Why would you do that?!" He said as he grabbed the last of the dirty laundry basket and desperately tried to dirty his room back. I had to grab the basket from his hands just to stop him.

"Kyeom! What are you doing?!?" I asked him. I just cleaned his room and his first reaction was to be angry at me and dirty it back??

"I WANT MY ROOM AS IT WAS!" he shouted and I was shocked he went over to his cabinet and literally grabbed everything I just folded and arranged and threw it away on the floor. I ran and stopped him before he could throw everything away. I grabbed him by the waist to stop his sudden outburst.

"Kyeom. Stop that!" I said to him as I grabbed both of his wrist. He looked at me and that's when I saw his face full of tears already.

"Kyeom..." I said slowly.

"STOP HOLDING ME BACK! AND STOP FIXING MY THINGS!" He shouted again. But this didn't even made me scared of him.

"Kyeom rela—" I slowly said.

"No! THIS IS MY ROOM AND IT'S MY DECISION. You don't get to decide things on your own!" He shouted and half whispered the last sentence he said. I was so confused.

"Sorry... I was just trying to help." I said to him. He's drunk and sad and angry... I'm not gonna sue him on this. I actually am glad that he's not hiding anymore.

"WELL IT DOESN'T!" He shouted again as he continued to throw his things away purposely trashing his room.

"Kyeom...stop it." I said slowly but he still continued to trash everything.

"KYEOM! I SAID STOP THAT!" This time I shouted at him while pinning him on the ground. Tackling him in the process. He started trying to get out of my grip and trashed under me.

Then I did something I didn't expect myself to do.

*SLAP SOUND AND THEN SILENCE.

I slapped Kyeom.

"PULL YOUR FUCKING SELF TOGETHER KYEOM! I'm not just gonna watch you take this out on yourself anymore!" I said and then he looked at me with a wide eyed expression. Then his lips quivered and then he started crying non stop. I felt guilty. I was about to apologize when he suddenly said something.

"I want everything back.... I want Joshi back" He suddenly said in a much softer tone and then full on sobbed in front of me. He placed his arms around my shoulder and sobbed. I was taken back.

"Kyeom I'm sorry..." was all that I said as he continued to cry. I wanted him to open up but I didn't expect this at all.

"Why can't we just go back???" He asked crying.

"Kyeom. I know you're hurt but you can't do this to yourself." I said to him.

"You don't know how I feel...... i'm alone.. I will always be alone.." he said and I felt all of that. He was hurting and felt like he was alone.. i feel so bad that I hugged him even tighter.

"You're not. I'm here. Your friends and family are here... " I assured him.

"I know... but I don't wanna burden you all with something I can't even explain." He suddenly said.

"Kyeom, it's alright to feel sad. You don't have to pretend like you're okey in-front of us. Especially not infront of me." I said honestly. I wiped some of his tears from his face.

"I'm sorry.." he said and sobbed once again.

"If you don't wanna talk about it. We can just stay here. I'll sit with you till you feel okey. You can cry laugh do whatever you want. I will be here. I won't go away. And I won't judge you I promise." I said to him and he smiled through his cries.

"I miss him so much." He softly said as he laid his head on my shoulder still sobbing. I wanted to tell him that he was here earlier but I don't know if that will help or not so I shut my mouth and just continued to sit next to him quietly.

After a little while he finally stopped crying... he was calm and we ended up on the bed as I waited for him to stop breaking down.

"Sorry for shouting at you." He suddenly said. I looked at him and his puffy eyes and red nose is very obvious.

"It's alright. That was your one time pass and you already claimed it." I joked and he chuckled.

"But seriously. Thank you. I think I needed that slap too. I just didn't know that you had it in you to actually slap me" He said and I laughed.

"I know right. I didn't know I had it in me too." I said honestly.

"Thank you.." he said once again.

"Thank me again when you get to eat the pizza I ordered." I said.

"You ordered pizza??!" He asked shocked.

"What? I was hungry." I said honestly and he laughed. The genuine laugh that I haven't seen since last week.

"There he is!" I said.

"What?" He asked confused.

"That's the first genuine laugh I heard from you." I said and he smiled.

"That's because I feel much better now. And pizza really sounds good right now. " he said and I smiled.

"Whatever you weirdo." I said and then he hugged me.

"A weirdo who is willing to slap you if you lose yourself again." I said and he laughed again. He just needed his bff.

———————————////—/////————-

Author's note:

Another emotional update but here it is. Love yall. Happy reading. See you in the next chapter.