Deadly Game - Chapter 33

READ IMPORTANT NOTE AFTER THE CHAPPY!!!!!!

Chapter 33

We're lined up, ready to walk in. Prep-team, escort, stylist, mentor, and winner. There are a few other mentors from District 4, former winners, friends of Evan, who have come to speak to us, and I see Evan talking in a low voice to one of them, a woman. Another, a man I'm sure everyone in the whole Panem knows, Finnick Odair, comes to stand in front of me. A hand is reassuringly placed on my shoulder.

Finnick wasn't an active mentor this year, nor were any of the others, so I don't know them. I've caught glimpses on TV, seen recaps of their games. Never spoken to them. The woman now speaking to Evan was here before the start of the games, but I never saw Finnick.

"Great job there, Blossom. Can't wait to train with you." Then he leaves to talk with Caro. His words surprise me, but I can't afford any emotions for a reaction. Everyone seems to be rebels, now when I know the signs.

I just close my eyes, focus on a poker-face. I won't let the audience see how much everything I'll see on screen now has affected me. Won't let them believe I'm weak.

"Cass?" Evan's voice is soft, worried. I open my eyes, gaze into his.

"Yeah?"

"This is my friend Lydya. Thought I should introduce her."

Lydya smiles at me, a friendly and open smile, and I see some pity in her eyes. I remember that she was eighteen when she won. She probably pities me, going through this at my age. Because I also see in her eyes that she's never really healed the scars of the Arena.

I guess nothing, not even time, can.

"Congratulations, Cassidy. I bet we'll see each other a lot later on, so we'll have plenty of time to get to know each other better."

I realize how much of a family these winners become.

Suddenly someone says that we're about to begin, and the friendly chatter disappears as people take their right places, preparing to go in. I lift my chin, but my hands are trembling.

Evan stands in front of me, and as the prep-team and Violet enters, he whispers over the loud applause,

"Poker-face, Cass. I'm with you through it, okay?"

I nod, and swallow. His hand finds mine for a moment, squeezes it reassuringly, and then lets go as Caro enters. The clapping and screaming increases.

Evan walks out, and I wait until it's my turn.

I take the few steps out of the door, out on the stage, and the lights almost blind me. I keep a poker-face, let a small smile slip onto my lips. The crowd is cheering, my ears hurt, but I smile.

Caesar Flickerman greets me, smiling so brightly that I almost can't look at him. I hear what he's saying, but my brain does not register it. I hear myself answering, hear the crowds laughter, but I have no idea what I'm saying.

I'm soon allowed to sit down, and the show begins. Watching the recap of the whole games will be extremely painful for me.

The area blackens, and I stare at the screen. What will it show me? Can I even bring myself to watch this?

Of course you can, silly. You won the games, this is nothing.

The voice inside my head whispers encouraging words, and I know my subconscious is trying to tell me that I'm strong enough to do this.

But truly, am I?

I gaze at the crowd, search Evan's face, find Caro's instead. Her eyes capture mine, silently tell me that she trusts me, counts on me.

I let my eyes wander further along the row. There he is, his handsome face hard to see in the dark room. He's talking – or more like whispering – with Finnick, but then glances up to meet my gaze, holding it for a long time.

I let his strength flood into me, know that he's been through this too. I see that Finnick and Lydya are also watching me, and I straighten myself in the chair, shoulders down and relaxed, poker-face perfect. I will not allow any cracks in it.

The show starts.

They show the reapings, lingering on mine, since I'm the victor. Swan is beautiful, and in my mind I see the tear-streaked face of Dove. Then it's me, and I fight to keep myself emotionless as I see my family. I make sure not to look at Rino. I'm not going to stand seeing him, my first kill, still alive and certain of his victory.

Evan's eyes do not even once leave my face as our reaping plays. I see in the corner of my eye how Finnick leans close to Evan, whispering something. I guess it's about me, 'cause Evan looks at me, and then nods to Finnick, his face shining with pride.

I keep my attention on the screen. Axara's reaping brings tears to my eyes, and I blink to keep them away. Those big greenish eyes nail the camera, staring at the audience. I catch a quick glimpse of her family, and try to burn their faces into my mind, to be sure I'll remember them. Mailey is pretty, and Eriza plain and straight beautiful. I understand where Axara got her looks from when I see the pained face of her mother. Hard work has left it's traces, but the long and lean body and delicate facial features can still easily be seen.

It hurts.

The same thoughts run through my head. I could have saved her. Maybe. If we'd stayed, and fought, instead of trying to cross the bridge... if I had had the time to throw my two knives... then maybe.

But really, what would the difference be?

If I had saved her, she'd still have to die for me to sit here, in the winner's chair.

Faith's reaping is heartbreaking. I freeze in the chair, sit unmoving as I try to stay emotionless. Faith is crying as she walks to the stage, but what I really look for is the big cluster of children who watch with terrified big eyes, the girl with auburn hair that stood beside Faith, the faces of other children in the crowd who look like someone has hit them. Faith's friends from the orphanage.

Then the reapings flash forward again. I learn so many names I don't want to know.

Roselle, Kent, Deva, Joen, Elly, Cole, Larissa, Dannie...all dead.

District 11. Larissa, the girl, walks to the stage, and I hear Andie's name called out. I see the surprise on his face before he hides it. A small nod is exchanged between him and the mayor. First, I'm confused, the I realize. Andie is the mayor's son.

Dannie, the boy from twelve who tried to kill me, and Daria, are the last two reaped. I see no one but a girl Daria's age – so alike that they could be twins – even reacting. The girl cries out Daria's name, and Daria just walks on, but her lips move. I think she says 'sorry, Cara.'

Then there are interviews, and then the games.

I watch it all again. The bloodbath, my alliance doing different things, me almost dying, Faith's death, Axara and me against the Careers, Axara's death, Adina and Dove, Andie...

The show is three hours of torture.

When it's finally over, I'm ushered to the Training Center, to the same room I was in before the games. Evan and I get to talk for a few moments, and we decide that tomorrow, everyone can know about us. His kind eyes reassure me as he leaves for his own room, his hug lingering. Violet tells me I have an hour before dinner.

My letter is there, none of the Avoxes have moved it. Probably they haven't even noticed it. I add a small slip of paper.

My name is Cassidy Wildeman.

I'm from District 4, and I'm fifteen. I'm the winner of the 69th Hunger Games.

I have an amazing boyfriend named Evan Storm. Tomorrow I'll tell the world about us. My family is waiting at home, and my best friends too.

The Hunger Games have ended, but I'm now going to play in a much more important game. It's called life. And I'm going to win. Again. Always.

Three sets of eyes smile at me when I close my eyes.

Brown.

Green.

Black.

So guys, this is the end.

I can't believe I wrote that. My first ever story coming to an end. It's sad, but still so wonderful.

I'm so thankful and so lucky to have you all amazing fans who've supported me, and I want to say a few words.

Tack.

Kiitos.

Thank you.

I can't name you all, so if I don't say your name, still know you mean the world to me anyway. (I have a horrible memory.... sorry! D:)

@MissusMe - thank you for supporting me right from the beginning. I can't say how thankful I am. Love you forever, Flopsie <333

@nmnguyen - I don't know where to start. What haven't you done for me? Umm... you haven't promised you won't kill Cato. Yet. I'll get that promise outta you, sooner or later! Tack, Me-monster! Your long comments and honest opinions knock my breath away.

@Spiffz - you have an endless amount of ideas and specualtions, and you love Andie just as much as I do! And... you're a little bit crazy, just like me. So how can I not simply love you?

Others are my sister @_sunsetgirl_ and @AyslaQ. @AlannaTheCreator, @Nightheart, @AprilHounsome, @crazyblonde13, @katnisseverdeen1997... the list is endless!!!!

I'll post messages about the sequel thing later, but it's almost (almost) certain, and will probably (in the lack of a better name) be called

Deadly Lies

<33333333 Anna