Part 48

___Billie

I'm in the parking garage.Usual spot.___

It was late Wednesday evening. Billie and I's first ever date.

She didn't tell me where we're going yet. She only told me to dress up. So here I was with most of my closet on the floor after trying on countless outfits before deciding on a long black satin dress paired with a dark red hand bag.

Grace was still at the office, so I had to decide on my outfit myself. My hair was up in a slick back bun, and the only thing that was still missing were my gold earrings.

I quickly texted Billie back that I'll be out in a second. Only a moment later, she texted me back, telling me not to stress.Too late.

I had been anxious about our date ever since she texted me that it would be tonight. I dont know why. I know it's just Billie, but at the same time, it is Billie. The girl I had been secretly in love with since childhood.

This is what I always wanted. To be publicly loved and not just in private. I didn't care if she would want to hide me from the media . All I cared about is that in front of friends and family, she wouldn't act like there wasn't this pull between us.

I clutched onto my purse once the elevator doors to the parking garage opened. The air was colder down here, and I regretted not bringing a jacket.

Billies car was tugged away in the back corner where she always parked. Just in case.

I could already see her from afar leaning again her car. My heart did this stupid flutter thing again, and my breath got caught in my through once I saw what she was wearing.

Unlike usual, she wore a black corset top paired with some baggy black suit pants and a baggy blazer. She looked so incredibly hot. I couldn't believe she had grown to become this amazing and stunning woman. And she wanted ME and no one else.

A smug smile was playing on her lips once I came closer, her eyes obviously studying my outfit.

"Hey. Sorry I made you wait." I apologized, giving her a quick welcoming hug. Though once I pulled away again, her hand stayed placed on the lower of my back.

"Don't stress. Told you you're good." Billie smiled before biting her lip. Her gace slipped down in between us admiring my dress. " You look so good, baby." She said, looking back in my eyes.

I think my heart stopped for a second at her calling me baby.I could feel the heat running up my cheeks, obviously blushing. I didn't even try to hide it but instead returned the favor.

"Well, you look so damn hot. It's crazy. "

"Thanks." Billie snorted, amazed by my choice of words.

Her fingers slipped off my back before opening the car door for be dramatically bowing as she mumbled " M'lady "

I giggled, getting into the car enjoying the princess treatment.

The car ride was filled with music and laughter, luckily easing the anxiety in my stomach a little. I was so goddamn nervous.

Eventhoug I begged her to tell me where we were going she stayed quiet till we pulled into the parking lot of this amazing restaurant. It looked so luxurious I felt instantly out of place.

Though I was glad at my choice of outfit as this one was definitely the most fanciest. Still, I somehow felt underdressed seeing all those properly filthy rich people walking up the steps to the grand entrance.

"Damn," I mumbled while getting out the car - Billie dropping off the car keys at some random dude who was gonna park the car for us. So strange, I thought.

Billie held out her hand for me, helping me up the steps.

The inside looked like it was out of some movie. Huge sealings, open space. It almost looked like some ancient Greek building from the inside. Impressive, of course, but at the same time, absolutely not my vibe.

But of course, I plastered on a smile for Billie because I didn't want to hurt her feelings by telling her I hated it here as she was the one choosing this place.

A waitress brought us to our table, which unfortunately was basically in the middle of the room and offered absolutely no privacy.

I was really hoping to talk things out with Billie tonight, but she seemed so out of reach on the opposite side of the table.

"This places nice." I said, trying to hide the fact that this felt so akward.

Billie hummed while looking at the menu.

All of the dishes on the menu seemed so utterly strange and unknown. Like I had no idea what any of this was supposed to be.

When our waiter came back with a bottle of wine, I was silently celebrating inside. The waitress filled up my glass while Billie declined and instead asked for water.

Right, she wasn't drinking. Even if she didn't needed to drive she wouldn't have.

I took a big sip feeling the red liquid flow down my throat.

I think without the wine I was about to go crash out with how overstimulated I got here.

Billie was seemingly still interesstedly studying the menu while I just blankly stared at it.

The waitress returned shortly after to take our orders and I just randomly chose something of the menu that was rather cheap because I knew Billie would insist on paying.

I knew she was rich so I didn't have too but even their cheapest dish was do fricking expensive.

Billie ordered something aswell though I couldn't make out what. It just all sounded simlish to me.

This was not my scene.

"So how's the wine?" Billie asked once the waiter left.

"Its good yeah. Pretty sweet so you would like it." I smiled but this time genuinely.

"You look really pretty. " Billie said like she just ignored what I said.

Butterflies erupted in my stomach. "Thanks, you too."

Billie smiled. After a second I spoke again. "Maybe we should talk now while we're waiting for our food."

Billie nooded."Yeah we should."

I was about to open my mouth again to start when suddenly an orchestra to our left started playing. They just appeared out of nowhere.  I pursed my lips to a thin line annoyed by the fact that the music was so loud that we couldn't understand each other.

I could see Billie mumbled something from across the table, but I couldn't understand a single word."Sorry, could you repeat that?" I asked, but  I could tell Billie couldn't understand me either.

I mean, the music wasn't bad it actually sounded quite nice, but it was just a little too loud.

But none of the other guests seemed to complain. They rather seemed pleased by the fact that they didn't have to talk to their partners.

Our date was lowkey a full-on disaster, but I acted like it didn't bother me ,too scared to hurt her feelings, so instead, I refilled my wine glass.

Once the food arrived, the music quieted down a little.

They served me what looked like a scoop of smashed potatoes with some kind of sauce and a pistachio on top. My fault though for just ordering something.

Billies didn't look much better, though. It was some crushed vegetables. And once again, the tiniest portion.

"Looks delicious dont you think." Billie smiled up at me already her fork on hand.

No.

"Yes, very." I faked smiled. I think I'm too poor to understand how someone would enjoy food like that.

After taking my first bite already half the food was gone. It wasn't actually that bad, but still.

None of the talking I wanted to do was done. Instead, we filled the silence with some random small talk about the food and the restaurant.

When the bill arrived, Billie instantly snatched it to pay for the both of us."How much is it?" I asked curiously.

"You dont wanna know." Billie chuckled.

"No tell me." I said but I was already dreading the answer. We barely ate and drank anything.

"It's 342 dollars."

"What!" I basically yelled, making some heads turn into our direction."Sorry. " I excused myself absolutely embarrassed before turning my attention back to Billie.

"That's crazy really. " I said in disbelief .

Billie nooded before speaking again."Yeah, and the food wasn't even good."

"Jup and the portions were way too small for the price." I added.

Billie laughed." Exactly. And this place is so overall akward. "

Now I had to laugh too knowing that Billie had hated this as much as I did and we just lied to each other saying that we liked it.

"I didn't even know what I was ordering O just chose something off the vegan menu and prayed." Billid full on belly laughed. " Same." I laughed.

" Omg let's get out of here and get some real food." Billie chuckled helping me get up.

"Yes please I'm starving."

Well our definition of real food might be different from other people's because only a few minutes after leaving the restaurant, we pulled into the parking lot of the closest Taco Bell.

Billie ordered our usual in the drive through before parking in the back of the parking lot where the Street lights didn't shine.

Finally we had our privacy while eating actual food.

"God is this good."Billie moaned taking a bite of her burrito. I agreed with a hum.

"I have to admit I just googled fancy restaurants in LA and chose the first one that popped up." Billie admitted after a second .

"God why would you do that." I snorted and Billie shrugged her shoulders. "I guess I just wanted to treat you on our first date." Cute.

_

"Do you wanna finally talk?" Billie asked after devouring her third burrito."Yeah."

So we talked. First we talked about our past and what we had and we searched for the flaws of our past situationship.

Then we talked about our kiss and what it ment to us.

"I kinda hate that it happened when you were drunk." Billie said my gace catching the way she was playing with her rings for comfort.

"Because it makes me question if you actually wanted it or if I kinda pushed you to it " She rambled but I had to cut her off because none of what she was saying was the truth.

"No Billie. You didn't push me to this. I wanted it okay. I wanted to kiss you for so long but I was scared. The alcohol only helped me to over come my fear and I dont regret it one bit."

I could hear Billie exhale like she had just Holden her breath while I talked.

"Okay." She whispered finding my eyes again . The moon light reflecting of her ocean blue eyes made them seem like they were glowing.

"You dont regret the kiss?" She asked again to make sure she had heard me correctly. " I dont regret the kiss." I repeated.

A smile formed on her lips."Good because I dont eighter. "

I nooded while a smile creeped onto my lips aswell.

It was quiet for a second before Billie spoke again." I want to show you something. "

Shifting the gear we pulled out of the parkinglot. When I asked her where she was driving us she just smiled and told me that I find out soon.

I playfully rolled my eyes but let it slide anyway.

She drove us around for awhile while I watched the houses pass by until they slowly started to thin out and Billie pulled onto an offroad way.

"I swear if you murder me in these woods Im gonna kill you." I joked as we drove out of the city up a hill surrounded by trees.

Billie laughed, shaking her head." Don't worry, not tonight."

Once we reached the top, Billie pulled into an abandoned parking lot before getting out.

Once again she rounded the car to open the door for me." Careful. " She said holding out her hand for me to grab as I still wore my heals and the ground was pretty uneven.

"If you'd told me we were going hiking I would have brought other shoes. " I said fighting for my life on the little trail that led away from the parking lot.

Billie led the way holding tightly onto my hand and stole here and there a glance back at me.

"Well I didn't intend to take you here today. But I can carry you, I dont mind." She proposed stopping in her tracks.

"No, dont worry, I think I'll just go bare foot. " I said, clamping onto her hand for support as I lifted one of my feet.

"Oh no, dont. Who knows what's on the ground. It's too dark. Come on, I'll carry you." She warned before turning her back to me again to hop on.

"Don't you think Im too heavy -" I started, but Billie caught me off with a groan.

"Omg you are not too heavy Val. Now hop on. Don't worry I've been hitting the gym you're safe with me." She chuckled.

I never doubted I wouldn't be safe with her.

"Okay." I mumbled slipping my arms around her neck and hopping on her back for a piggyback ride.

"You good?" I asked once I was on and Billie nooded her hands slipping under my knees for support.

And just like that we continued our walk with me on Billies back as she lead us through the dark. Only the lights of LA illuminating our path.

"Are we almost there?" I asked after a few minutes whining like a child on a road trip.

"Yeah, almost. You dont recognize this place don't ya?" She asked. Howwas I supposed to recognize anything it was pichtblack. Billie could literally walk off a cliff and I wouldn't notice.

"Why should I recognize this. Have we been here before?" I asked confused. I looked around but I was really too dark to figure out if any of this looked familiar.

Billie simply shrugged with her shoulders." You tell me." She said as the trees beside us finally thinned out and the city lights came into few.

It was a small clearing in the woods right my small cliff giving an amazing view over LA. The city lights sparkeld like stars.

There was a small bench right there to enjoy the few where I climbed off of Billies back, slumping onto the bench.

Billie followed me suit."Do you really dont remember? We used to come here so often with my dad when we were younger and then alone when we were older." She asked and I could feel the burn of her gace on my cheek while I watched the city.

"I do." I whispered. I remember when we used to go on little hikes here. Now I felt stupid for not realizing earlier where we went.

"Wait!" I gasped jumping off the bench."Do you think its still here?" I asked crouching down on the floor before getting my phone out of my bag to turn on the flashlight function.

"It is." Billie smiled as she watched me search the front of the bench for what we had carved into it a few years ago.

I felt it before I saw it. The heart carved into the wood beneath my fingers and then the light illuminating the "B" and "V" within.

"God I can't believe this is still here." I gasped and I couldn't keep the smile from slipping onto my lips." Its been here for how long?" "5year." Billie said from her spot on the bench next to where I was crouching.

"I can't believe its still here after all these years." I chuckled getting back up before sitting back down on the bench.

"Yeah." Billie whispered .

It was quite for a second before I spoke again." How did you know it was still here?" I asked . She had seemed so sure that it was.

"You still come here sometimes?" I added to my question.

She nooded slowly. Almost like she was embarrassed. "Not as much as I used to but every time I just need some space, some time alone this is where I go." She explained turning her gace back to the city.

"I get it its very beautiful here." I mumbled watching cars turn into random streets below us while my head slipped onto Billies shoulder like it was the most normal thing.

"I used to come here a lot." Billie started off after awhile in silence. "After you left I mean. I hated myself for what I did but it was too late when I finally realized what I had done. You moved God knows where and had a new number. And I had no way of contacting you again."

She wasn't looking at me when she was talking just staring off into the distance like she was rather admitting these things to herself than me.

"This was the only place where I could pretend like everything was still fine and like I didn't fuck everything up. And turns out I was an even bigger asshole than I thought. " Her voice broke on the last words and I could feel the single tear tripping down her neck.

"What do you mean?" I asked lifting my head off her shoulder to look at me.

"Your mom. " She whispered finally looking at me.

"I left you all alone and I didn't knew that your mom was sick. I could have been there for you . I should have been there for you back then. And I'm so so sorry that I wasn't." Her voice was shaking as I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her against my chest.

"Its okay Billie. Just like you said you didn't know. Because I didn't tell you. "I hated how guilty she felt and I could tell she had been carrying this around for awhile now. This guilt, this regret .

"But its my fault you didn't tell me. I was being a bitch because I was scared but you were dealing with something bigger."  She said burying her face in my neck like she was scared to look at me but needed me at the same time.

"It okay Billie. I forgive you. " I said stroking her hair a little. " You know I was angry at you for awhile but at the same time Im just as much at fault as you are. I should have faught harder for you, for us. But I didn't.  I let you go and left. I was the one begging my father for a new number because I couldn't stand the texts of my old friends about where and why I had gone. I wanted a new start after my mom died."

I took a break to hear Billie sniffling.

"I thought it would be easier that way but it wasn't. But it was too late you took off on your career and I thought you would be better off without me . So I never reached out again."

Once I finished Billie pulled back again. Her eyes were a little puffy and red but still they looked as pretty as always.

"I wish you did. I was never better off without you. I only did all of this to distract myself from you." She whispered  reaching for my hand, and only then did I realize that I was crying too.

I started laughing as a tear tripped down my cheek. " God we are so emotional."

That made Billie throw her head back and laugh aswell. All this because teenager us didn't want to admit to ourselves that we were in love with each other's.

"Lowkey so dramatic. " Billie chuckled, her eyes finding mine before her expression suddenly became more serious. And just like that her hands  slipped to grab my cheeks and mine buried in her hair as our lips crashed onto each other's.

The kiss was deep and passionate as our lips moved against each other. It filled the cracks and all that had been. It was our restart and promise to be honest with one another.

_

We spend some more time on the bench enjoying the view with our fingers tangled.

It was quite only the chirping of the grasshoppers filled the silence. It was peaceful and for once so was my mind exapt for one last question sitting on my tongue.

"What does this make us?" I asked my voice barely above a whisper but I knew Billie could hear me.

"What ever you want it to be." She whispered back. I was quiet again for a second letting her words linger.

"I think I would like you to be my girlfriend if this is what you want too." I said my cheeks instantly turning red as the words finally slipped off my lips.

I could tell Billie was smiling when she answered. "I would love that Valerie ." She lifted my head up to her lips for a final kiss before we decided to head back to the car. It was late and the usually warm LA air had cold down causing a shiver to run down my back and goosebumps to form.

"Here take my jacket." Billie said slipping off her blazer before helping me put it on. " Thanks Billie."

Once again Billie had to carry me back but she said that she didn't mind carrying her girlfriend. She enjoyed the feeling of of the word "girlfriend" slipping off her lips and I loved hearing it.

The way back felt quicker for some reason because in no time where we back at Billies car.

The car ride back was quite but not akward it was rather soothing. Billie didn't even ask if she should drive me home or if I would sleep over the night at her place because we both knew the answer.

_

Shark came bolting for us at the front door seeking some attention after being home alone the entire night.

"You're so cute sharky." I cooed as I rubbed his belly on Billies couch while she made us some tea to warm up.

"I was actually thinking about getting another dog." Billie said coming into the livingroom with two mugs in hand. "So he isn't alone all the time."

"Thats a great idea. I would love another dog." I smiled at her as I scratched Sharks ears.

"Of course you would." Billie mumbled as she set the mugs on the coffetable and joined me on the couch.

We started up some random movie on the TV that none of us actually payed attention to too busy cuddling with each other to care what was going on. Mostly because the plot was obvious from the beginning.

That night, both of us fell asleep in each other's arms as girlfriends, and I couldn't have been happier.

A.NNot the end but we're getting close. Not absolutely happy with this chapter but its whatever. Writing this with an ocean view hihi and I just had to think of everything I wanted mv because of this car and its dark out ( random side fact ).