CH 58: The Truth

This place reeks of death 🎶

There's a chill in the air...

And I barely escaped being killed by a hair,

Great Alastor, altruist, died for his friends,

Sorry to disappoint,

That is NOT where this ends....

He paces the floor, his claws sharpened and digging into anything they can grasp. His desk, his palms, his scalp, anything.

Like a cold iceberg rapidly melting and becoming undone.

I'm hungry for freedom like never before,

The constraints of my deal surely have a back door,

Once I figure out how to unclip my wings,

Guess who will be pulling all the strings ~

Ḣ̸̡͎͈̰̌͜A̷̝̩̦̅̓̕H̴̰͠A̴̢͕̹̲̘̱̍̈́̆͘Ḩ̸̡͚͔̝̳͊̌̽̓̈́A̸̧͔̞͕͙͍̒̅̋̆͜͝͝Ḣ̷͚̹̫̪̉͊̃̕Ą̶͕́̉͑͘͠H̶̟͎͚͐͌̓̌Å̵̡̼̞̺̬̐

──── •✧• ────

Esme groans as she pulls herself through the wreckage, finally approaching the radio tower. She quickly walked in through the side. "Alastor!" She calls out, causing his body to tense and a loud screech to fill the air.

He turns to face her, "D-Darling..." He begins, "How did you get in here? It's a wreck." He didn't want her to see him like this, like some pitiful nobody.

Esme turns her body to the side, pointing to the door off the hinges, "Door was open..."

"Son of a bitch..." He mutters, turning around and slamming his hand on the wall in frustration.

Esme notices the drops of blood on the floor, "Oh God, it's worse than I thought, isn't it?" She hurries over, looking at the wound, "I told you to put pressure on it. You should sit down."

"Nonsense." He waves his hand dismissively, "I've survived much worse. Sinners regenerate after all."

"Not from angelic weapons." Esme protests. "If you just let me hel-"

"No, no, no I'm fine, really I am." Alastor reassured in a phony tone.

He didn't want anyone, let alone her, to see him like this. He was one of the most feared beings in all of this ring, and there he was bleeding in his tower like some useless waste of space. He was weak, and weak was the last thing he wanted to be.

Besides, there's no way Lilith would let him bleed out and die. She still needed him for her deal.

Right?

"Why are you being so stubborn?" Esme groaned in frustration, "Just let me help you!" She pleads. She knew that if she used her siren song to relax him, she could help bandage him up and make him as good as new.

Normally, he would refuse. But in his current state, he realized he had little choice. His eyes flashed with irritation, but he begrudgingly nodded in agreement.

"Fine, you can do your siren tricks. Just don't do anything crazy, dear."

She tilts her head to the side, "You rather be in pain than feel nothing?"

Alastor paused for a moment, genuinely thinking about it. He gritted his teeth as he winced from the pain.

"You're a real menace, you know that?"

"I promise you may, in fact, find it quite enjoyable~" She teases, "Now go ahead and sit down."

Esme could sense his hesitation as he follows her order, noticing how his body language changed, and he wasn't the sweet demon he was this morning to her.

She takes his hands, "Hey, do you trust me?"

He takes a moment before he nods.

Esme nods back before her eyes begin to glow a bright green as a hypnotic melody emerges from her. She closes her eyes and places her hands on his head, slowly feeling herself entering his mind, attempting to calm him.

She begins to send messages to his subconscious to submit to her and be still, but the waves of his mind are like a storm she's never seen before.

Chaos.

Still, she persists.

Alastor's ears fall back at the sound of the music coming from her. He resists for a little bit before feeling compelled to trust her and allow the blissful sound to consume him. He closes his eyes, his toothy grin dialing down to a closed smirk.

The pain begins to subside, but not completely.

"Now, be good and hold still~" Esme voice echoes as she rips off a piece of fabric from the bottom of her pants and holds it firmly on the wound to stop the bleeding. She's still humming lightly to keep him entranced, "You're doing very well~" She echoes once again.

Alastor felt a strange sense of comfort and peace wash over him.

His usual sharp and intimidating demeanor was replaced with something calmer, almost docile. He quietly muttered in a slightly dazed tone.

"I... feel... strange..."

Esme chuckles as she checks the fabric again to make sure the bleeding has stopped.

"That's normal, probably for you.~" She continues her song, feeling him resisting her a bit. "No, no, my sweet." She puts a hand on the side of his face, "Don't push away, you'll make things difficult. Just listen to my voice, I bet it sounds pretty~" She echoes with an alluring melodic undertone.

He let out a soft sigh as he listened to her voice, now sounding less harsh and more relaxed.

"Your...voice..."

"Mhmmm there ya go~" She pulls the fabric back and uses her magic to stitch him back together. She grunts as she rips the thread with her fangs. "Viola, all done." She turns to him and waves a hand, releasing him from the trance and ceasing her melody.

Alastor's eyes widened as he suddenly snapped out of the state. He shook his head slightly, feeling disoriented and fuzzy from the experience.

He looked down at the now stitched-up wound on his chest and touched it gently, feeling a lingering but faint pain.

"Well, I'll be damned..."

Alastor looks up at her and notices her eyes fixated on the floor. He tilts his head to the side, one ear following suit and dropping.

"Why didn't you come for me?" She asks bluntly, staring at the floor without meeting his gaze.

He was stunned by the timing of the sudden question. He just stared at her blankly for a few seconds before speaking again.

"Excuse me?"

He was very much aware of what she was referring to, but kept his composure, even though that question hurt him deeply.

His attempt to appear ignorant of her reference enraged her to the point of explosion.

"Don't play coy with me, Alastor, you and I both know my memory has been restored. Why didn't you come for me when you died?! Did our lives mean nothing to you?"

She was finally ready. She needed to hear the truth.

Alastor was growing frustrated at the repetitive questioning. There were so many things he wanted to say, but it hurt just to even think about speaking to her about this. He clenched his fist angrily and held eye contact with her.

"Of course, our lives meant something to me..."

Esme's eyes glow brightly and her fangs drop from her mouth in obvious fury, "Then why didn't you come for me here?! Why leave me alone all this time?!" Her body begins to tremble, showing her weak spot.

"I meant nothing to you, didn't I?"

Alastor's eyes widened further as he heard her quiet, cold words. Her tone cuts through him like the sharpest knife.

"That's...that's not true." He paused, "I care, more than you know. Perhaps even more than I know..."

"Bullshit." She growls, standing up and turning away.

He jumps to his feet, "It's no such thing!" He shouts.

"I've been going back and forth, racking my brain, trying to understand the reasoning for my abandonment. If you truly cared for me, if you truly held compassion and love for me, then you would've never considered that option." Her breathing becomes erratic and unsteady, "So, tell me why, Alastor! WHY?!"

"Why?! You really have to ask me that?!" He shouts, his eyes burning with all of the hell within them.

"Yes..." She growls, "I want to hear you say it..."

At this moment, he had snapped. He was done hiding the truth from her. He was done pretending that he didn't hold adoration for her. He didn't care what came next. He just needed her to hear him.

"Because I was too damn afraid!"

"Afraid?!" Esme laughs, clearly believing he is making a mockery of her, assuming she would fold at his false confession, "The Radio Demon was afraid? Fucking rich, Al. Stop with your lies." She begins to walk away from him, but he grabs her wrist and spins her back.

"For once, I'm not lying!" He shouts. His eyes scanned hers, as if he was searching for life within them. He growls, frustrated by her disbelief and dismissive attitude. "You have no idea what it's been like for me all these years. Seeing you down here, knowing what happened, it's tortured me for decades. I can't get you out of my mind!"

"Alastor..." Esme attempts to interrupt.

"I LEFT YOU BECAUSE I KNEW YOU WOULD DESPISE ME ONCE YOU FOUND OUT WHO I TRULY WAS!"

There's a silence and Esme retracts her fangs.

"You were better without me!" He continued, "You were thriving, you were growing, I - I knew that if you recognized me, you would crumble seeing what I've become. I'm already disgusted by my own actions regarding your demise, I didn't need you to also feel that way towards me..."

"Alastor..." She began to walk around the radio tower, "For years, I was plagued with the not knowing what happened to me. Not knowing who I was, or what I had become in hell...I - I can have any man I desire, do you understand that?" She turns to him, "I could entrance hundreds of men and lure them away to do whatever I please, and no matter how many of their souls I devoured or destroyed, all I wanted was for the man I remembered in my life to come to me...and now it's been decades."

He listened intently, "I know... I've seen the men come and go, throwing themselves at your feet. I've seen you toy with their souls, all the while knowing it should have been me."

He took a step closer.

"But I couldn't... I couldn't bring myself to come to you. I was too afraid of what you would think, what you would say..." His ears fall back, "I was a fucking coward."

Esme's eyes widen at his language.

"But you killed me..." She says, "Have you no remorse for that?"

Alastor froze at those words, hearing them spoken aloud hit him deep within.

"I have more remorse than you could ever fathom." He says softly, "I will spend the rest of my agonizing days being remorseful. It was an accident..." He admits quietly, his eyes fixed on the ground. The guilt he had been carrying for decades was written all over his face. He looks up at his, his expression pained. "A horrid accident."

"Then why not find me?! That's just cruel Alastor, you left me for nothing!" She begins to cry. "I sat with you at those overlord meetings for DECADES!"

Upon seeing her tears and hearing her pain, Alastor instinctively reaches out and cups her face, stepping closer.

"I know... I know it was cruel. I should have searched for you, I should have sought you out. I couldn't bear the thought of facing you, knowing what I had done. You have to believe me when I say that I truly believed it was in your best interest."

She pushes him away, "Just let me go..." She grunts, "You'll have everything you've ever wanted."

EVERYTHING I'VE EVER WANTED?!

He clenched his fists, his usual self-discipline nearly evaporated. "You think that's what I want? To have everything but you?!" He picks up his microphone and throws it across the room with a thud. Esme gasps and follows it with her head, eventually returning to his furious gaze, "YOU ARE THE ONLY THING I'VE EVER WANTED!"

"Alastor..."

"I've spent years trying to bury my feelings, hoping it would make the pain go away. But it didn't. No matter how much I tried, I could never forget about our lives together. You were always there in my thoughts, tearing me apart. You want the truth? There it is. I love you, and no afterlife is ever going to change that!"

Esme's eyes begin to well with tears. "Y-You still..."

"I wouldn't have laid with you last night if I didn't." He said quickly, "I don't know how many more times I have to say it. I have never stopped loving you ever since I sat with you at that wretched speakeasy. Not for a single day, not for a single second." He grabs her shoulders, looking down at her, committing her face to memory, "But the thought of the one person I ever loved hating me. The thought of facing you and admitting to what I've done to you, corrupting you and changing you, I - I...it was too much to bare."

Esme looks up into his eyes, his crimson glow so breathtakingly gorgeous. She looked deep within them, and for a small moment, she could see his face in them. She could see the red shutters, smell the food cooking on the stove, and almost hear little feet running around.

She pauses, thinking before answering, "Every day.... every day that I've been in this hotel has been torture and I could never figure out why." She sighs and leans closer to him, "I love you. My soul belongs to only you, even without any memories, my heart always remembered you. I just wished you'd said something sooner..."

Alastor's breath caught in his chest as he listened to her speak. He slowly released his grip on her shoulders, but he didn't back away. His expression softened, a mixture of relief and sorrow washing over his face.

"I... I should have. I should have said something years ago. But I was so afraid..."

He paused, his voice quieter now.

"I was afraid you would hate me. Then when you revealed that I actually kil- was responsible for you being here, I knew I truly couldn't tell you."

"Well I'm not gonna lie.....that was very much not appreciated." She narrows her eyes. She sighs and looks down, "But I know it was an accident in the end..."

"I've regretted it every day since you've told me, it's haunted me."

Esme cuts him off by hugging him tightly, ".....it's okay..." She whispers into his coat.

"I don't deserve your forgiveness..." He whispers, his voice shaking.

Esme doesn't answer. She just sighs and nuzzles her face into his chest.

His hand slowly raises to the top of her head, where he leans down and rests his head, taking in her scent.

"I've missed you so much."

"I've longed for you." She whispers, looking up at him.

Alastor looked down at his beloved, his eyes meeting hers. There were no more masks, no more hiding. He let his vulnerability show, letting her see the depth of his feelings and the pain he had been carrying all these years.

"I've longed for you too. Every day. Every second, every minute, every hour. You were always on my mind, no matter how much I tried to push you away..."

He lifted a hand, gently stroking her face.

"Being apart from you has been a torture worse than any suffering I've experienced in Hell."

A deep blush passes over Esme's cheeks as two fins pop out of the side of her head from being so flustered.

Alastor couldn't help but chuckle softly as he noticed her fins change in appearance, an endearing reminder.

He gently brushed her hair behind her ear, his fingers ghosting over the fins.

"You're even more beautiful when you're flustered." He said with a small smirk.

"...I-Im not flustered..." She lies, looking away.

Alastor chuckled again, his smirk widening. He knew his wife well enough to know when she was lying.

"Oh really? Then why are you blushing so much?"

He took a step closer, trapping her between him and the wall. He lifted her chin, forcing her to look at him.

"Or why are these adorable little fins coming out, hmmm?"

Esme's voice gets lost as she continues to gaze into his eyes, blinking slowly, "....I-..."

Teasing her was a habit he had never quite kicked, and right now, she made an incredibly adorable target.

"You... what? Lost your words?"

He leaned in closer, his face now just inches away from Esme's. He could feel her breath against his skin as her breathing increased.

"Are you going to finish that thought, darling?"

Esme doesn't answer but instead pulls him harshly by the collar of his suit, kissing him deeply.

Magic soon fills the air.

~ Author's Note ~

I'm so tired, so please go easy on me if there are any typos. :/ 

Also, I've decided that Alastor and Esme's house smelled like this candle from B&BW. 

GO SMELL IT! I burn it everytime I'm writing for immersion - LOL! 

I've waited forever to write this chapter, I hope you all liked it! 

🖤Words: 2717 🖤

~ Artemis 🦌💗