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"Maybe you should consider taking the doctor's suggestion of adding the antidepressants after all?" Eddy suggested quietly the next morning, his arms holding Brett tightly to his chest as if he was scared he'd lose him if he didn't. Brett sighed.

"I've just let things get overboard again. I'm sorry," he mumbled, biting his lip. He did feel better after sleeping, which in turn made him feel like an idiot for not sleeping before.

Eddy kissed his forehead softly, running a hand through his hair."Don't worry about it love, just try your best to get better again. I miss you."

Brett hid his face in Eddy's chest, trying not to cry like some child. He hated how he made Eddy care for him like a child despite the insane patience he had, that angel. It made him feel even worse about everything. Could Eddy just snap at him and tell him what an idiot he was?

"Shh, love, it's okay," Eddy whispered, rubbing his back. "It's okay, cry if you need to."

"I don't understand what I did to deserve your patience," Brett mumbled, still hiding his face. "Why don't you just yell at me, tell me what a loser I am and abandon me? I just don't understand..."

Eddy kissed the top of his head carefully again, pulling him even closer."Because, Brett, I love you. I love you no matter how much of an idiot you think you are, no matter how much of a loser you think you are, no matter how many times you tell me I should abandon you. You're sick, and even when you behave like an idiot because of it, it's usually because you try to be better for me. How could I ever turn my back on that?"

Brett nodded a bit, feeling Eddy's fingertips tickle the back of his neck."I do want to become better for you," Brett mumbled, closing his eyes hard. "I really do, but I don't know how."

"I'll tell you how right now, if you want," Eddy said, combing his fingers through the hairs in the back of Brett's neck. "How you can improve to make me happy, I mean."

"Yes please," Brett whispered pleadingly. "Anything, Eddy."

"Take care of my world, of the love of my life, my boyfriend, fiancé, future husband and partner in life. Take care of yourself, Brett. When you're okay, everything else happens on its own. I just want that back."

Brett nodded quietly, sliding his hand underneath Eddy's t-shirt on his back to be closer to him."I'll try, okay? I'm sorry I'm not okay right now."

"Just try to get better from now on, please?" Eddy whispered, looking down at him. "Because I love you so much and it's killing me to see you struggle."

"I promise, I'll try my best. I'm so sorry I've put you through all this. You deserve a happy life," Brett mumbled, feeling Eddy's breath increase in tempo as it always did when he fought tears.

"I'll have a happy life with you when you feel better. It's not about being well, it's about being better, okay?"

"Okay. I love you, Eddy."

"Love you too, Brett. So much."