Chapter Twenty Four

This might hurt.

24•••

      Going over the list of attendees to the coronation, you and Jennie sit across each other at the library table with Ms. Choi to your side. You take a red marker each to check, circle, underline, re-assign, or cross out the names of which that adhere to you both as either suitable or unfit to be seated in the respective row they have been currently assigned to by the council.

"Jennie"

"No"

"She can't sit at the back"

"Corner row, perhaps?"

"I heard she's a twat" Ms. Choi is not helping.

"While her family sits at the first box?"

"She won't be missed"

You scribble over Jennie's drawn arrow that directs Bae Joo-hyun's seat all the way to last row of the congregation. Believing she is just as an obnoxious, self-seeking, spoiled brat is of no question to you. Jennie and Jisoo have given their generous share of libel to the daughter of the noble Bae family- and she fairly deserves it to her incredulous name.

But her bloodline has done great deeds to Northern royalty, and they are respectable people in all of their region. Their one and only darling daughter cannot sit behind the rest at any means.

"Fine" Jennie mutters, marking a rather harsh check mark upon the name, "But if she opens her mouth even in the slightest, then I won't have it."

You chuckle at her adorable brood and assure she won't be bothered by the Northern girl.

"Jeon Jung-kook, second box"

"Bloody no" you drag your mark from his name all the way to the end of the paper—

Jennie gasps, "That's not fair!"

"He's ghastly!" you defend your hypocrisy, shuddering at the thought of Sir Jung-kook ogling at you with his thick smug smile.

"I heard of his indecency, as well, Your Highness"

You reconsider Ms. Choi's previous judgement.

And you realize Jennie does have a knack for flailing her arms in debates, "His family is practically the Southern version of the Baes— he's even richer!"

"You wouldn't want him close to the platform either, Jennie" you look down to the paper and check on the next name, adamant on your decision to move Jungkook out of his seat.

"He's rather pleasant to the eyes" Jennie insists, but you know how quick she will be to change her mind after what you say next- she won't like it.

"In his eyes, he has me bent over the table with him right behind" you just don't have the decency in his name to sugarcoat his silent desires.

It alone has silenced the room.

Jennie stares at you, stupefied. Ms. Choi is similarly stunned by your bluntness, stammering over words to fill the thick air accumulating at the table. She can't even utter to scold you for it.

You purse your lips at Jennie and shrug for your honesty, and you give attention back to the paper— She snatches it and crosses out Jungkook's name.

"Where are you to put him now?" Ms. Choi questions.

Jennie doesn't look up to you. She shakes her head and her jaw clenches tighter as she goes ahead of herself to skim through the following names on the list, "The slaughterhouse, perhaps." to get her mind off the lewd image you just put in her head,  "He is uninvited".

A protective front has never looked the least bit of unattractive on Jennie. You have to bite your tongue to stop your smile from spreading across your face. Neither do you wish to give away your blush in front of Ms. Choi., who seems just as disgusted by the thought of Jungkook and would care not to oppose.

You brush Jennie's leg under the table, to beckon her to look up so you could tell her need not to worry about him, and tell her you love her through looks of endearment.

She looks at you with eyes of regret and irritations, but they soften in the seconds you gaze at her dearly.

"Shall we move on to the parliament arrangements?" Jennie slides the guest list aside and shies a toothless smile back at you.

      Time passes quicker, in the lightened mood of jests and wholesome conversations, the three of you get plenty of coronation plans settled. Though, there is still a handful to go. Ms. Choi advises you and Jennie to manage significant hours of sleep, because days will be longer and nights may be compromised for work for the next month to come.

Reality is only starting to feel real. Ironic as it is, these past months have felt to go by in a glowing scene of a dream. A fantasy almost. You had pictured yourself before, how you would be standing where you are today.

You think about early April, the Cup you sought as one of your life's legacies, but has then become just a mere trophy and an event of the past. You think about the time you thought Chanyeol was the one, but it was just your silly, naivety blinding you. You think about Jisoo and what you hoped to never happen to her has now come true, and Lisa, you try not to think about her just yet. You think about your father and some things haven't changed, you conclude with him.

A few nightmares, yes, but always overshadowed by the best parts with Jennie.

She is the greatest turning point of your phantasm. How different your lives have fallen into place compared to what you had perceived the first time you met. Had you known to love Jennie this way, you would have pictured every moment of your days with her to be the greatest seraphic. But now that you live the present with Jennie, nothing you could have ever dreamed could equate to this heaven.

You're suddenly washed with fear. An ice cold bucket drenching you to wake up. Fear for the fleeting present and the approach of a future uncertain. A future that starts once you are crowned- you shiver, imagining the golden diadem atop your head and Jennie's upon hers and Marcadia at the palm of your hands without a trace of Jennie like some sick trade—

You get that gut wrenching thought that this heaven wouldn't last forever.

It feels awfully real.

"I best hand these papers back to the council." Ms. Choi says, gathering today's work in her hands while you and Jennie tuck in the chairs, "I shall inform you of any further revisions to—"

You hear a shout. The voice, the order of your royal guard to the others.

And another with running footsteps down the corridor. You hear the commotion of guards heading for the vestibule like a chase in an enemy attack.

You hear Lisa.

You hear her grunts and shouts to stop- Jennie grabs your arm in a fright and you pull her with you toward Lisa's drawn exclaims to let go of her and panic sheers inside you with every grueling boom of the struggles outside- you need to stop them and you need to hurry—

You run faster, beating every pump of your rapid heart because something is wrong- you hear Sehun- you shouldn't be hearing his voice but you do and it's loud and calling for Lisa and you hear your father and his orders for restraints.

There is the shrilling terror for what you are to see because you just know. You're running on your broken promises shattered on the floor from the striking impact of your failures upon your best friend. You tried, you tried your best to stop what you have been so afraid of from coming entrenched, but you let Lisa down and her reality stands in the almighty of your father by the grand doors.

You tried— you promised— but they've just been caught.

"Lisa!" you push past the servants who have come to watch. You see Lisa by the gates, held back by Suho- held back from Sehun tackled on the ground.

"Oh god- Sehun"

"Jennie wait—" she dashes to her best friend and the disorder and you stride to your father because he needs to stop this "Let them go" they have done nothing wrong-

"It's a shame, Roseanne" he says, though, torn with his demands is far from the impassive disregard he has as he watches the arrest with his chin high, "I thought Lisa new better. She is the Princess' best friend after all."

It's innocent with Lisa- it always is so please— "Father I can explain it all- they just—" You look back at them "J-Jennie—" she's trying to pry the guards off of Sehun- she's going to get hurt, "Please - this is just brutal!" you exclaim and you hope the whole palace, all who stand to witness the showcase of their underlying fate come they find love- let them know what merciless mortal they have for a king.

Your father looks down at you. He is emotionless, unremitting and brazen, "This is monarchy." a cold heart you have for a father "Take him away" he commands the guards.

"N-No— wait" you jump down the steps and run toward Suho, "Stop" you say, exerting all your strength to wring his hands off of Lisa. She tries desperately to get to Sehun. "Suho please" You're begging him to put what he thinks is right before your father because you know- the tears in his eyes are sorry for following orders.

"Let him go!" Jennie shouts and pulls and fights for Sehun's release, but the guards merely shove him toward the prison carriage.

"Jennie stop- don't" Sehun tells her, unwilling for her to be hurt in the struggle. He glances at you and it tears you apart- he's angry and scared and he's no longer fighting for his liberty and when he looks at Lisa, he's sorry for what he's done, telling her that's enough fighting.

But your best friend is unrelenting as she wrestles to stop Sehun from leaving for the cells, just like Jennie who pounds on the doors for his release. But Lisa knows she has lost her chances of liberty too.

Her freedom is on the pathway to penitentiary.

"Forgive me, Lisa" Suho says for his loyalty to the King, swallows his tears and lets go of Lisa as the gates close between her and Sehun's exile, as it is too late to bring him back.

She falls to the ground, heaving painfully, "Lisa" you envelope her in your arms like it is the most you could do- only you could have done more- you could have tried harder-

"Rosie do something" Jennie hauls. Her knuckles cut open in her forceful attempts.

You look back at your father who disappears behind the doors, retreating behind his kingship to garner it as a mere substantiation to his injustice. He uses power for the unprincipled system he puts behind unreasonable laws and he does nothing but turn his back on those deemed below him- no matter if it is turning his back on you.

      You throw the doors of his threshold open, dismissing the implores of your royal guard from doing so. "I demand a council meeting- I demand an overrule of the law" you affirm with all the conviction- all the burning passion you have. You refuse to take the calmer approach like Jennie says because your lack for better action to stop the guards- your guards for god's sake- from taking Sehun away have caused her knuckles to seep blood and god Lisa, she's—

"You do not demand anything from me" your father mutters, a deeper pinch of vexation for speaking to him this way in front of Jennie and Suho. He grasps a bottle of liquor from his side trays and pours it on the rocks as if this is a time for celebration, "I'm sorry for your stable boy, Princess Jennie, but he had broken the law- palace subjects from opposite regions are forbidden to fraternize." he says with little to no sincerity at all.

Your entirety fires up, fists clench and jaw ready to bark your unpleasantries but Jennie reminds you of her placid presence when she says your name softly, only heard to you, and you do not wish to scare her any more than she is already afraid for her best friend's accounts.

And Lisa, frayed and frightened, enters at the most unprecedented time- "Please spare him King Mason" father is not in her favor. He only lifts his eyes to her for a second before tending back to his drink.

In truth, you can't turn to Lisa eye to eye either as your supremal front might just crash down with one look at the mess your family has caused her and Sehun. "Go, Lisa" you tell her you will handle this.

"No," She clasps your wrist, tries to get you to look at her because she's apologizing for her mistakes- gutted for not listening to you "Rosie—"

"Get out of here" Listen to me now, father has no patience- you don't want to hear what he has to say.

"I don't want to leave you" she says but her voice trembles in tension to face your father.

"I said get out, Lisa." you repeat, low and clear. You are forced to reside on your own royalty, "That is an order." but you promise this isn't you turning your back on her.

You hope she understands, because you do not look to make sure as Suho leads her persistence out and closes the doors behind them.

Father takes a long sip of his drink and grumbles in audacity, "There is no room for traitors"

You step before his desk, "Neither Lisa or Sehun are betrayers to the royal families. They have been each of our longest, most faithful trusties, father you know this. They are innocent of everything but love" and love is not dangerous.

Father jibes his glass on the desk, "What sort of a fool crosses the boarders with no legal obligation, dares to trespass the palace grounds all in the goddamn favor of love" he of all wouldn't understand, as if he wouldn't be just of a fool if mother were alive. "You listen to me, Roseanne" he rounds the table, stands before you with a menacing glare, daggers with feat of power in his eyes to wound you weak, "I choose what is best for the people and what is best for you"

"You know absolutely nothing about us" he has forgotten that you are not five years old anymore, nor is the kingdom what it used to be.

"I have and always will do of what is ri—"

"How could you possible speak such empty words when you are not even half the man you were before"

The air shifts as your words disseminate in the silence. It crawls up your skin.

You don't want Jennie to breathe in this air. See the dirty truth that is your father in his nature.

What was grey in his faded orbs, shade in a piercing dark slate but still hold nothingness to the entreats you just wish he would see.

It pours in you a vile color of red- filling your lungs with the poisons you have left to spew and it's suffocating. Your throat is tightening and you feel the room closing in on you because you have never stood to your father like this and you're shaking but you don't think now is the time to stop being brave.

"I am the King of this kingdom- I have made it what it is"

"And I will be the one to make it thrive then, you will no longer reign over me" I am not a coward.

"I am still your father—"

"I lost my father the day my mother died-"

He raises his hand and he slaps you.

Jennie's breath hitches and your eyes glisten with tears. Your father steps back.

For a moment all you do is stare at each other. Then he swallows thick and turns his back to you- again. It stings across your face and you are flamed in heat because violence is your father's weapon for obedience, used on Suho the last time you spoke in this headquarters- you just never thought he would use it on you.

Adrenaline surges in your veins and you think to bite back- fucking look at me- but you hear a second wave of commotion out from the window and Lisa's calls for you being dragged.

They must have waited for your distraction so they could take her away without disruption.

You look at Jennie and she's staggered by the argument, your father- god he just slapped you- and the noise outside- Lisa—

You rush to Jennie and take her hand gently but firm, and with security, pulling her out of the threshold, "Rosie" her voice is so soft it prickles more tears in your eyes but you give her hand a squeeze to tell her you're fine, you just need to hurry.

So with Jennie by your side, you break out into a sprint for the gates.

You're running on cold feet, almost numb to your body's burn and trembles. Your thoughts are fickle, turning in every direction of what you should do next but only redirect with no answers. There's a pit in your chest, sinking in worried currents because what is next is clear- fifteen strikes on Lisa, eighteen on Sehun, and no appeal, because you can't get through to the King- you won't get through to the council-

"Rosie I should phone my parents- my dad may be able to change your father's mind"

You glance at Jennie as she's beginning to slow down. Her eyes are filled with fear, but she nods her head to assure you that it may work. For the Northern boy for the most part, but it is still of help. Far fetched, but possible.

"I'll come find you later" you let go of Jennie's hand and she dashes down the next corridor while you continue onward the gates before you're too late.

•••

      "I just need you to tell me you understand- tell me you know why you and Sehun... Why it just can't be—"

"But I don't understand- I don't understand how we are any different. Jisoo and Suho, they are—"

"I've already given my warnings to them both"

"And when you're Queen, you will out-rule the law that applies to them, correct? Jisoo gets to live happily ever after, won't she."

You're caught behind Lisa's words, because in hindsight, she speaks nothing far from the truth.

"What about me?" she asks, and it burns to look at her.

"It's just different, Lisa." You pry the words out of you to speak, "Sehun is from the North and I-I don't have full control over politics, even as Queen— there's the council and my father and... I want you to be happy Lisa truly I do." you won't turn your back on her, "I'll try my best for you." you promise you will—

      "Please change it" Jennie begs of you because as she tells you of the blames, the insults, and the angered tears from Sehun, she is struggling to bear the possibility of her best friend walking out of her life because of her orders that will keep him in it. She tries, but as the tears are too quick to sit at the brim of her eyes, her voice dies in the back of her throat.

It pains you to see your favorite eyes cry.

      Stopping yourself from crying is, too, flagrantly difficult. It was not so long ago that you built promises with Lisa in your past confrontation, and with Jennie, it was just the other day. Whether your promises were made impractical and unrealistic, or were scheduled to wait for your reign- scheduled for too late, they mean nothing now.

You couldn't stop the carriage.

Your throat hurts, lodged with the tears you hold back. You take in the deepest breath you can to stop your hands from shaking so damn much, and lift your pounding head up to the door, where you hear Jennie's pacing footsteps waiting for you.

The weight of your guilt is overbearing. It gnaws at your bones and everything else you have done wrong tangles in your chest, tying you in knots of your flawed vows and your imperfections and it's so tight, you're finding it hard to breathe. Finding it hard to even stand here, to tell Jennie that you've let her down- you've let everybody down- to the greatest extent, to the most painful. And you just don't know how to fix it. You didn't know how all along.

All along, you put too much faith in yourself.

You are not a Queen.

Just a pitiful example of a Princess. You have no spine. No fortitude to keep a grasp on righteousness and power when they are placed in your hands by chance. You let them slip between your fingers for everyone else to suffer your incompetency.

You are a liar, and a hypocrite, spared by the royal blood that runs in your veins.

And you have known this all along. You were just too much of a coward to wholly admit it.

Standing here to tell Jennie what you couldn't do is just as good as carrying the whip itself. Your ineptitudes to give love a fair trial slashed on Lisa's and Sehun's back.

Turning around and heading straight for your room is more like you. Running away from anything that scares you is what you are good at.

But you thought never speaking empty words was like you too, and yet your tongue has elicited unfulfilled promises to the people who mean the most.

Therefore, opening the door is swallowing what is left of your pride.

You look at Jennie and she is in absolute worry, "Rosie" she breathes your name and she sounds so beautiful in what is of ugly truths. You try harder to keep the tears at bay. "Rosie, did you- Lisa-"

You shake your head no.

Because no, you couldn't.

You were too late and the carriage was rolling out the gates and you were shoved back in the palace by your royal guard. And your feet were nailed to the marbled floors because you couldn't get yourself to come in the lounge to face her and you tried to be brave a little longer but to feel small and inferior and useless is what you deserve—

Jennie cups your face in all of her gentleness. She runs her thumb over the numbing sting from your father's hand to soothe.

You close your eyes tight, reminded of the hurtful words you had said to him and the disgrace that he imprinted on you when he slapped you cold. Jennie had seen it all. You just wish it would forget itself from both your recollections.

"It's okay" Jennie holds you close and she says your name again, "Come back to me, Rosie" in a quiet whisper that cuts through all the noise in your head. Bringing you out from all the chaos just by the sound of her voice, her ability to ease your mind.

You listen to her breathing to guide you free and back to her. You can only hear Jennie.

"We've all had our wrongdoings, love" she says, so quiet to subdue the clashes of your heart, "All our mistakes have resulted to this- you are not alone."

Jennie tells you she forgives you.

She tells you she understands, and that she, Lisa, Sehun, Jisoo, Suho, all of you have played the wrong cards too. And before your sincerities could fall off your lips, your tears are first to cascade as she tells you she loves you.

"I'm here, Rosie"

It seeps in you, brewing warmth to a solid flame in your chest. It may be contemptible to let yourself ease when Lisa and Sehun are to face a barbarous penance, but Jennie's presence reminds you that control is futile in the hands of corruption.

You cannot submit to a depraved mind, not now.

So when you open your eyes, your tears have gone. Your breath has evened and you garner a voice to speak, "Your hands" you take them from your face and you kiss the drying wounds, "I should call the nurse- are you hurt anywhere else?" you asses Jennie with carefulness, but she stops you in assurance.

"Don't worry about me, love- I just got off the phone with my dad" she tells you, and the tiniest bit of hope in her gaze is something you hold on to, "He is on his way right now and he will try to call off the sentence or- or persuade for a different punishment from your father"

You lead Jennie to the couch and take a seat with her, "D-Do you really think..." you don't mean to diminish the glint her eyes, but you can't help but question it.

"I don't really know what to think, Rosie" she says honestly.

You kiss her knuckles once more.

"But perhaps this is the only chance we have left"

The disappointment that may come with expecting too much from King Tae-oh may be outright painful, and perhaps disappointment would be the greatest understatement. Though, it may just as well be something you are willing to endure if you are let down, as you choose to believe that the Northern King is a much better man than yours.

•••

      Ms. Choi unravels the answers to the questions you and Jennie have. After consulting with Suho and the rest of the royal guards and servants on duty, she tells you that Sehun crossed the border late last night. Assuming his calculations to avoid triggers were wrong, he sounded the alarms and his whereabouts were investigated all through the night until morning. He had packed a bag of essentials, though it was left by an abandoned shack where he must have hid.

It appeared he had no solidified plan to be discreet in sneaking into the palace. The watch guards had caught him climbing over the side gates.

"Lisa had nothing to do with his agendas and only knew he was here when he was caught," Ms. Choi says, and she looks down with regret, "Though, she had received a letter yesterday." she pulls out the crumpled, opened envelope from her dress pocket and she hands it to Jennie. Indeed, a letter from Sehun to Lisa. "It had fallen out of her pocket in the struggle earlier, hence the revelation of affairs to your father."

Jennie tosses the parchment on the table, "What an idiot" and stands abruptly, walking away to process this all for a moment.

You take the letter in your hands and upon reading it, chills surge through you. Because written in beautiful cursive letters etched across the paper- every line scripted to fit as many words as it could- I love you, he wrote. Over and over until the very end, Always, Sehun.

"If he had just stayed put" Jennie mutters in her distress, scowling out the window in search for peace of mind.

You fold the letter carefully, then slip it back in its envelope.

Lisa would want this back.

"He thought of this as some kind of fight or flight ordeal, I'm certain. I told you he was determined to run away, but run away with Lisa just never occurred to me." Jennie's anxieties have their way of spiraling into frustrations. Sehun's dangerous extent to be with Lisa, his failed attempt is definitely no exception to them, "He's always been thickheaded and dare I say dimwitted, but I didn't think- I didn't know he could do something as utterly stupid as this."

The air is dense, and you aren't sure what you could say to alleviate it. Because yes, you think. If only he had listened to Jennie, then him and Lisa wouldn't be at the brunt of the law your family imposed to begin with.

"I apologize if this is overstepping my place," Ms. Choi says cautiously, and you look up to her curiosity and confusion, tied with her willingness to understand, "but have you known about Lisa and Sehun's affair all this time?"

You and Jennie catch uneasiness in each other's eyes, as detrimental sentiments have left no layers for filter in front of your mentor.

If you have ever thought to believe Ms. Choi and her asserting alliance, then you put your faith, and your trust in starting now.

•••

      You all really must have done it now. The complexity of the situations your best friends are in have left Ms. Choi all out of advice. Dumbstruck and unnerved. You could only imagine what greater perplexity yours and Jennie's circumstances would bring, but this is one thing you choose not to disclose just yet.

"Oh dear" Ms. Choi murmurs again, a slip of the tongue as she has been trying to wrap her head around the narratives for quite some time. Long enough that King Tae-oh had arrived, and his deliberations with your father are ongoing.

Jennie managed to speak with her dad for a short moment, while you only had a chance to say hello in the rush of things. But in that brief exchange, you saw the fret and unsettlement in the King. His hand shook when he held on your shoulder, and gaze faltered when he tried to look you in the eye.

It spooked you.

You had never seen a fearful King before.

Whatever he had spoken about with Jennie must have done the same to her. She hasn't moved away from the window since.

With Ms. Choi in deep thought, you stand from the couch and walk over to your love.

"Jennie" you say quietly, bringing her out of her own thoughts. She glances at the space between you and your mentor before lifting her somber gaze, "Do you want to talk about it?"

She looks down again. Her now bandaged hand inches forward, her fingertips idly fiddling with yours in secret. You understand what she means to say with her silence, and it must be a father-daughter thing, so you nod your head and choose not to press on, but Jennie finally says something, "Dad used to lie to me all the time"

It takes you back. The bluntness of it. Jennie is suddenly deadpan when she looks at you.

"White lies, he always used to justify. Don't go outside, the micro-dust will make you sick,"

A father-daughter thing.

"Your pastry tastes divine, Jennie. You look stunning in that dress, Jennie. This gift is the best I've ever received, Jennie."

You take her fiddling fingers and intertwine your hands, going to comfort her whether you understand where she is going with this or not.

Jennie ponders, and after a pause, "Hanbin will be fine, Jennie." her grip loosens on yours as her features dispirit. "That was the last white lie my dad had told me. And he realized what should have been harmless was the most harmful of all."

King Tae-oh holds plenty of guilt for what happened to Hanbin. As partaking in bringing Jennie and Hanbin together in the first place, and letting them find love in each other only to be taken away, was a blame placed upon him by Jennie herself. Knowing this, despite hurt never intentionally inflicted by King Tae-oh, he would always feel remorse as a father.

"He is certainly taking his word to the grave as he won't ever lie to me again," Jennie sucks in a sharp breath, and you pull her against you- wrap your arms around her, hug her, embrace her because you ache to take away all the hurt from her, "He couldn't lie to me again- not even when I asked him to," soak up all painful sensibilities she can exude to bear them for her. You hold her tighter, feeling her shake in stifling her tears."I just wish he would lie this once more."

In the short minutes you have Jennie in your arms, her heart beats against you. It is slow and penetrating, like a throb for the sorries to Sehun and Lisa. And in the short minutes you secure her, your endearments are drawn out in the quietest of sounds, almost inaudible, but enough for her to hear.

"I love you" you tell Jennie. Over and over because you are lucky enough to do so. While you hold her chest to chest like love is meant to be shared- like love is meant to be held- you will tell Jennie you love her, always, and until the very end.

•••

      The sun is soon to set, and there is still no word from the Kings.

During the wait, Ms. Choi had excused herself from the lounge as she was informed that the chatter amongst the servants was getting out of hand. You thought to handle it yourself, but felt that your... disheveled... appearance would just induce the babbling.

Anyhow, the rumors are likely true, and coating the ugly truth of your father's flawed monarchy is not in anyway part of your agendas.

You only wish to bring Lisa and Sehun home and that is that.

"What will you do about Suho?" Jennie asks, lifting her head from your shoulder. She turns your chin to her and grazes your cheek lightly, "He was so torn earlier."

You have mixed emotions toward your royal guard. Your protector, your shield, but still, your subordinate.

He didn't listen to you. He never does. Even if his regrets are transparent in him, you cannot excuse them with sympathy.

Whether or not him letting go of Lisa today had made a difference, you would have gained some consolation knowing he would choose your side over your father's. And from here on out, whether in consequence to others or not, in serving his duties, you will always question where his true loyalty lies.

"Love," Jennie's whisper wisps in your ears, "where did you go?"

You blink yourself out of your thoughts, and you kiss Jennie's palm on your cheek with a small smile. "I'm not certain yet of Suho" you tell her, and with nothing further to say.

Jennie nods, not willing to follow up on the topic. She stares at you fondly, touching you gently, then when she leans in to kiss you- kiss you softly- you suddenly wish the only thing that should matter to you is Jennie.

How ridiculous it is to say- that you've missed her. Waking up to her feathering kisses this morning seems like it was long months ago. Like you have been slipped away from her warmth for far too long when it has only been less than a day's worth.

You wish you could lie in bed, at this very instant, with the sheets over you and Jennie without a care for the world beyond your bedroom.

You wish you could escape today all together, and you wish Sehun was still stuck in the North and Lisa was down at the stables because you wish not to worry anymore.

You wish you could kiss Jennie without the thought of losing her.

You pull away because for christ's sake- "I've been so selfish" you confess, under your breath because you're so ashamed to admit it.

"What?"

You were just wishing for mistakes to be unmade so you could lie in bed with Jennie, "I am selfish"

"Selfish?" Jennie tries to get you to look at her, "Baby, what do you-"

She's forced to put a distance between as someone knocks on the door.

"Come in" you grant them immediately, and you stand from the couch, dismissing the topic because you don't want anymore selfish thoughts to think about.

"Wait Rosie what do you mean-"

King Tae-oh enters.

The room falls quiet and the air looms fickle. Your heart beats faster the longer he takes to speak the words his somber expression means to tell.

Jennie stands before him, "Did you do it? Did you change his mind?" she asks, as if searching for a gleam of hope on his face, "Dad, please tell me that you..."

He looks at you and you are absolutely gutted. Because his eyes frown like the saddest droop of his lips and the regret, the disappointment, the lamentation- it all wrenches you breathless.

He was overruled.

"I am afraid Sehun breached Southern laws." King Tae-oh says- and you've lost all the regard, the little you had left for your father.

"No- no dad, please tell me that you-"

Jennie's desperate hands are grasped in her dad's and he looks at her sadly. And perhaps, you wish he would lie just this once too, "There is nothing further I could do, Jennie".

Though, you can't rely on wishful thinking forever. Not while your father is ruling over an atrocious reality.

"Then what happens now?" Jennie asks, and you already know.

"Sehun and Ms. Manoban are at the stakes."

You just didn't know you are running late.

"King Mason is on his way there."

•••

      In your direct orders to take you downtown, the carriage flies by your people who have come to watch.

And it seems that everyone is on their way.

"I can't believe this is happening" Jennie says, aghast and disturbed by the crowd after crowd on their way to the square plaza.

This would be the first public retribution since your grandfather's early years as King. And how long it has truly been, because the aversion of the people- your people- no longer shout for the felony's punishment, but bellow for their freedom.

"Jennie" you tug on her arm and pull her away from the window, in fear that the next rock that strikes the carriage will shatter the glass.

The times are changing. The old customs of monarchy are far from the line of democracy the Southerners are marching toward. And the town is tainted in dolor and woe on the people's faces for what their King has pronounced in suit of shameful tradition.

There is not a tinge of doubt in you that the people no longer look to royalty like they did before.

And you feel no different from them. You hold great anger and hatred for the King- on a heightened level for his blood runs in your veins and burns your skin to think about it- that this is all just so unfair and torturous and you feel like you're choking on guilt because you're headed straight toward the stakes with no power- no resolution-

"Hey, Rosie breathe"

And it burns in your eyes because you just can't bear it.

"Hey- look at me love" Jennie forces you to face her, and her worries are blurred in your tearful eyes. Your hands shake and chest tightens and cries give out because you're just so sorry, "I know you didn't mean for this to happen" you feel your actions have come just as bad as your father's- just as evil- because letting yourself be silenced in a crisis of injustice shows to those who witness it that you have chosen the side of the oppressor, "You tried your best, Rosie- there's just nothing more we can do" you want to- you should- refuse to believe that.

The hollers of the people in the streets fade away when the carriage rolls in the entryways of the square plaza.

And what confounds you is the sudden silence.

You and Jennie turn to the window in search for a racketing noise, and what you see is the most jarring of all.

The crowd looks onward. You see the platform and the posts and chains waiting for its prisoners. The people speak in murmurs and whispers. And the carriage takes you across to the main building- where your father must be waiting on his almighty chair, in direct view of the whipping behind glass walls- you're frozen in trepidation of what is to unfold.

You see the prison carriage parked by the platform.

"Jennie- there-"

Hands tied, Sehun is first to be shoved out. "Sehun" Jennie's breath hitches to see him being hauled on the stage.

You look for Lisa.

The voices of the people grow louder, hollering to release him but the royal guards keep them from doing it themselves, batons to be drawn at the first sign of attempt.

You peak over the heads of the people- the carriage stops at the building, just behind the platform and your heart stops when you see Rufus.

"We need to stop this Jennie" you see him and Chanyeol at the front lines, and they're faces- they're looking for Lisa- god you see Jisoo pushing past the people- they shouldn't have to see this—

Lisa's thrown down from the prison ride and shoved toward the stage. You jump out of the carriage-

"Rosie wait—"

You stumble on your feet— shouting like one with the people— "Lisa!" you run toward her being forcefully pushed by the guards, "Stop!" and she's letting them- she's letting them without putting up a fight—

Before you could even get close enough for her to hear you, you collide into your royal guard- you're being forced away from the platform but you fight Suho back. You push and you shout louder, at the top of your burning lungs "Lisa!" get down from there—

When she finds you in the uproars of the chaos, your world seems to crumble to pieces. Her eyes, lost and agitated in the middle of the battlefield, soften like she's dropping her armor and lowering her shield and she shakes her head- she's telling you to stop- "Don't look, Rosie" and tears spring to your eyes because she's forced on her knees.

"Suho stop!" you're pushed into the building and he bolts the glass doors from the outside- he's sorry for not picking your side.

Panic trembles inside you, riddling you overwhelmed as the penalizers await for your father's word.

You spin around and in front of King Tae-oh, in front of Jennie, and in front of all the subjects of the room who can't bear to look at the merciless King, you beg "Please don't do this" you kneel before him, and there is nothing but cruelty in the way he looks at you- looks away and out to the crowd because he has no remorse like the heartless. "Father—" He nods his head for the signal— "No!"

You're shown away from scene- Jennie covering you in her arms, "Close your eyes"

But no shield could defend the blood curling scream of your best friend.