Chapter Eleven

[WARNING: MATURE CONTENT]

11•••

The fleeting whistle is the only sound in the humid morning air. It's the melodic whistle of your coach. An old song that father had taught you when you were younger. One that you sung all the words to while he whistled along and clapped his hands. It is a song that you have long since sung its tune. You couldn't remember the words even if you tried. It is one of those memories you've repressed after mother died.

You hold Jennie's hand a little tighter as you walk closer to the stables. She has offered to accompany you while you have a word with Rufus. Approaching the door, Jennie notes she will be waiting outside, and when you enter, the whistling stops to greet you good morning.

"I was afraid you'd have forgotten about me." Rufus smiles, picking up a sack of carrots to place them in a trolly.

"You had gone to visit Chanyeol yesterday," you say, moving over to help him with the sacks. "is he well?"

That is a question you immediately regret. The last thing you would want Rufus to think of is that you still have somewhat of a likeness for his son.

Only, you don't even give a single thought to Chanyeol these days.

"He is working hard, Princess," Rufus says without a questionable tone. "There is one thing," he stops his work to look at you and nervous anticipation sits. "I'll be transferring to the Grand Stables. Your father reckons I could be of great help to young riders now that your equestrian days are finished."

"Oh," you should have expected this. Rufus wasn't going to be there for you forever. "I don't doubt you would be a great teacher to young kids."

He wasn't about to play father for the rest of your life.

"I truly appreciate that, Roseanne." he says sincerely, "My transfer has nothing to do with the Cup, you understand that right?"

You merely nod your head, even if you were considering it as a factor. The timing is impeccable. And the fact that Rufus won't be around anymore puts an awful sadness in you.

"I am always proud of you, no matter what."

You nod again, fearing your voice would shake if you speak.

"It's just a stupid race." he blurts, and you chuckle at his bluntness, "Do not tell your father I said that." he points seriously, then cracks a smile too.

"W-When do you leave, Rufus?" you ask, now feeling as if the times you've had have come up too short.

"First thing on Sunday morning."

"I'll be there to see you off." you say, and he opens his mouth to protest because he knows how much you dread early mornings, but he also knows nothing will change your mind on this. Rufus knows you just as well as his daughter.

"I will have to go to the trading ports to get Orange here some medicine." he says with regret.

"Is he sick?" you advance toward your stallion, only now noticing the watery eyes and louder breathing. "Are you alright, buddy?" you stroke him gently, a slight worry in you that it could be serious.

"I'm still looking for answers, but he's definitely been weary since the race. Don't worry too much, Princess, he'll be running cross country in no time."

You converse with Rufus for a few more minutes, before he heads on to continue working while you and Jennie attend class with Jisoo.

When you meet Jennie back outside, you tell her of Orange's unknown condition.

"Orange will be fine, Rosie, he's a strong horse." Jennie assures you, dragging you up the hill and out of your troubles.

And she must have inhaled your worry, because as you wait for Jisoo to come in with the test papers, she's bouncing her leg, tapping her pencil, and biting her nails in nerves. You take her hand in yours, trying to stifle your laugh at her adorable antics. "You'll get it right, love." you kiss the back of her hand, "You studied more than enough", and twice more.

•••

   Had you known the following days to be so lengthy and tedious, you would have spent every second of every hour beside Jennie and Jennie alone that Friday. Had you known the crunch time for the pre-coronation ball to be so laborious, you would have mustered enough time with Jennie to make up for what you don't get to spend with her for nearly an entire week.

You miss her badly.

It was not enough that you only sat for a proper conversation with her during meals- only one of the meals of the day because time can never revolve around both your duties. Even if you got to sit beside her during Saturday brunch with the parents, you wouldn't dare hold her hand while political issues were being tossed around the table.

And getting caught would be just as good as dead.

Neither, was the one night she slept in your room enough for lost time. An exhausting evening it was after your routine of planning with Jisoo and Jennie's planning over the phone with the designers and other contributors to the ball from the North.

You both laid in each other's arms, bickering about what champagne would be poured for the toast. It was a long discussion which Jennie had the last say to as you finally gave in. You would have given in five minutes into the conversation, but you just loved to hear Jennie's voice after deprivation of it.

And oh how she was loving the way you craved for her.

She made use of your busy days to her advantage. You've always known Jennie Kim as a tease.

Whilst in the ball room, supervising decoration set ups, she was hovering by the door. Every time you caught her gaze, she would look at you from top to bottom, god knows what she was imagining in her head to instinctively bite her lip- all just before walking away with a cheeky grin. In the midst of picking flower arrangements in the garden, you found Jennie's eyes by the glass doors of the palace. Two longing stares with a stifled giggle, then she walked away. In the vestibule, decorating the grand entryway, Jennie stood atop the stairs, telephone in hand and she smiled at you so beautifully, Jisoo caught your mouth in agape- gawking at what she saw was only the statue behind where Jennie had stood to melt your heart.

At the courtyard, you took a risk. Whilst Jisoo scurried off to chase Lisa for interrupting her brief of the program, you slipped back inside and in the library where Jennie was watching you like a hawk.

You swept her off her feet and you kissed her dearly.

It was sweet, but short.

There was much to accomplish before the ball and you both knew you couldn't stay long.

Those days were filled with stolen kisses and longing stares from Jennie. It was almost torturous, but you savored every glance. She still managed to keep your spirits up despite father's acrimony. To your luck, he hasn't been around lately. He would only comment of your shortcomings whenever he would pass you in the halls.

And father didn't care that Jisoo and/or Suho were around to hear it, as he has ordered them to report to him after everyday since all pre-coronation preparations have started.

That has served as another hindrance from being with Jennie throughout the week.

But now that you've signed off the last requirement for the event, and merely have the three days to wait until the banquet, you are freed from the chains that kept you from the one person you can't stop thinking about.

   "Your Highness," Suho hands you a glass of water.

"Thank you, Suho." you down every drop, parched from finalizing with coordinators over the telephone. "Do you know what Princess Jennie might be doing at this moment?" you stand from the couch, moving over to the wall mirror.

You straighten the tuck ins of your white polo and adjust your beige trousers.

"I believe she is down at the course, Princess. Lalisa and Princess Jennie's stable boy have been keeping her company." he tells you.

"Good." you tie your hair up in a ponytail and you look to Suho's reflection. "Tell Jisoo we'll be out on the trail if she needs us."

His thick swallow is awfully noticeable at the mention of your friend. You wonder if he knows what you do about the two of them.

But you decide to save it for another conversation.

"And do note that I do not want to be bothered by anyone whilst on the stroll with the Princess." because you don't have much patience left to be kept from Jennie any longer.

"Yes, Your Highness." Suho conforms.

You turn to face your royal guard and walk across the lounge. He opens the door for you, "Enjoy your day, Suho." you say on a lighter note, "I appreciate your care for me these past hectic days." you look up at him, his gratitude gleaming from his defined, charming face, and honor shining on his gold medals. "You are a good man." you can understand why Jisoo is so smitten.

Suho bows in his nobility, and as told, he does not follow you onward the stables.

   The sunlight shines softly and the fresh breeze blows through the ruffles of your polo. One breath of the air and you feel cleansed. Even more so when you hear Jennie's mirthful laughter.

You look over the hill to find her lying on the grass, propped on her elbows to watch Lisa and Sehun race to the equipment shed. As you approach from behind, she rests on her back and squints at the baby blue sky.

"Nice day, isn't it?"

Jennie lowers her hand from her eyes when you stand over, shading her from the rays. She looks at you fondly. "Nice of you to join me." she extends her arms and you pull her up from the ground. "Perfect for a ride on the trail, don't you think?"

"Orange is still too sick for a stroll, I'm afraid." you counter.

"Kuma can manage."

"I'm not wearing the right shoes."

"Don't worry," Jennie bites her lip to conceal her grin as she pulls you toward the stables, "I'll steer."

You don't protest when she asks you to wait outside while she fetches her stallion. You don't mind letting her take the reins either, as you're feeling a little too tired to ride yourself had Orange been better. You wouldn't decline the offer no matter the circumstance, to be honest.

You could finally be closer to Jennie. And alone with her at that.

"Say Hi, bud." Jennie holds Kuma steady.

You eye the large quilt laid on the saddle.

"I don't want your pants to rip," she smiles, "And I thought we could this to sit on by the cliff and watch the sunset."

A blanket. So simple, yet the thoughtful gesture warms your heart just as well as the quilt would.

You have the crippling urge to kiss her right here, right now. To hug her so close that you imprint her on yourself so you wouldn't ever have to feel like you are without her another second.

You've just missed Jennie too much.

"Hop on, Princess." she grabs your attention back and she helps you up to refrain you from creasing your brown oxford shoes, then she climbs on behind you. Her strawberry scent fills your senses and you naturally lean into her. "You alright?" she asks, bringing her arms forward around you to control the reins.

You sigh in the comfort of her disposition, "This is nice."

She chuckles at how easily you fall into enjoyment, "Just sit back and relax, Rosie." she kisses the top of your head and she lets you rest on her front as she guides Kuma into the trail.

You feel lightened in the tranquility of the forest, and the slight rock on the stallion's back is soothing as he paces slowly. The tension of the past few days alleviates from your body and the worries of tomorrow, there seem to be none. It seems that between the oaks and timbers, under the peering sunlight through the evergreen, nothing distressing could reach you.

Here, with Jennie, you are at ease.

"Is everything settled for the ball?" she asks, resting her cheek to your temple.

"Yes, I believe so." you say, craning your neck ever so slightly to nuzzle back in her nape. "And how are preparations from the North?"

"All accounted for." she says with a sigh, "I wanted to finish everything as soon as possible... I'm sorry your father gave you a hard time on your part."

"It's not your fault." You rest a hand on her thigh, rubbing lightly to ease her too. "I quite liked having a say in everything actually. I felt... useful." you realize this as you speak. You can't even remember a time your father let you take charge of, well, anything.

"Hmmm..." Jennie's dominant hand releases the reins and she glides it up and down your thigh, making your cheeks flush in an instant. It's just been so long since she last touched you like this. "I know," she says, in a deeper tone too, "I enjoyed watching you take control." and something about it sparks a feeling you missed all too much.

It doesn't help that you haven't been touched this intimately for just as long as you've been busy.

"If I'm being honest..."

You hum to the way she presses her fingers on your inner thigh. She trails higher and higher-

"I found it very sexy..."

An unbidden moan escapes you when she cups your center. Pumping desires heat up your body as she palms you. You squeeze her leg, moving your hips to the pressure she gives you- she knows very well how much you want this.

She teased you all week. Made sure to peer in the rooms and leave once you caught her by her feline eyes. She brushed your hand in the halls, bit her lip by the windows, licked them out the door- if you knew any better, you'd say she planned this all along.

"Jennie" you cover her hand over your center to rub harder.

"What is it, baby?" the words drip off her mouth like honey, smooth and thick- she kisses your temple, then by your ear, your neck-

"I-I..." you want this but this is absurd- you're in the middle of the forest- you're on a horse!

"Tell me, Rosie"

Your breath hitches when her fingers go under the line of your trousers, tracing shapes over your hot skin.

And she goes lower, fiddling with the garter of your linen panties- you shift against her, feeling the uncomfortable pulse of your core the longer she takes to touch you. It's enamoring and bewitching- like she's casted a spell on you to make you do the most ludicrous things- you are not a fool!

"I'm waiting..."

But "Please—" to hell with the damn setting "do it Jennie please—" She pulls out, licks her fingers and- "Mhm!" dips in your panties.

She groans once she feels how wet you are. Your hand clasps on to the back of her neck, clawing her skin as she rubs on your folds.

"You've made a mess, haven't you?" she snickers, finding a steady rhythm and centering on your clit. You tense up every time she flicks particularly hard and you clench your jaw to suppress the moans.

But that's not what Jennie wants.

"Let it out, baby" she whispers in your ear, making you shudder at the hot, lewd demand, "There's no one around to hear you moan for me." she kneads harder-

"Oh god" you groan, digging your nails to her neck to compensate for the pleasure. Jennie lets go of the reins completely. She slips under the cleavage of your polo- under your bra- she cups your breast and squeezes— "Baby" your breathy moans are louder here and they linger in the air to echo in the trees.

"That's it" she presses on the slit of your folds, pushing in your hole lightly- too slowly. "Be loud for me, Rosie" you mewl when she pinches your nipple. You watch her hand move inside your pants, coating her with wetness as she teases your hole.

"Take me Jennie" you beg, pulling her closer to you, "please just take me already" because you're craving for her inside— And she thrusts in two fingers deep- you clench around her right away. You throw your head back on her shoulder, mouth agape as you moan her name repeatedly- you're a mess as she pounds your tight walls.

You let Jennie take you like this, in plain sight, in the most ridiculous circumstance- and in the naughtiest way, letting her finger you like this is just so erotic.

It sends an electrifying wave of pleasure through you, bringing you closer to the edge because of just how dirty this all is. And Jennie sucks on your pulse as she thrusts faster, a heat layering her fingers as she goes. You jolt when she works her thumb on your clit.

"Jennie I need— harder" you choke out when she doesn't hesitate to do what you say, pounding- driving her fingers in you in ways she hasn't before. She breathes into your nape, her tongue licking and lips sucking your sweet spot. You tangle your fingers in her hair and she groans when you tug. Her hand slips out of your polo, touching you everywhere- your thighs, your hips- she puts her thumb in your mouth and your eyes roll back.

The blood rushing to your head makes you dizzy and the trees above you start to spin. Nature surrounds to watch you- hear you moan for Jennie and the sky is looking down on you as you're nearing the climax.

"Jennie" you squeeze her thigh, you clench your walls, "baby—"

She kisses your neck once, twice, three times— "Cum for me, Rosie" she says so bluntly, you whimper at her obscene words. It heightens your arousal and you're getting wetter with each stroke. The heat pools in your stomach and she increases her speed—

You shatter in a powerful release, tighten around her fingers and tremble against her. She wraps her arm around your waist, keeping you steady on the saddle as you heave for air and find your own balance while coming down.

Jennie slips out of you, smearing your wetness over your skin as she pulls from inside your pants. She brings her coated fingers to your mouth and traces your lips just before dipping in for your tongue to taste. Your eyes close shut as you clean her of yourself.

You're clouded in how rebellious- mutinous Jennie has turned you at this moment.

You wonder if this starts a list of kinks.

"I knew you would enjoy that," Jennie giggles, burying her face in the crook of your neck and taking the reins back in her hands.

"I can't believe we just did that" you exhale, head still a little dizzy, and you take deep breaths to even out the air in your lungs.

You tilt your head to place a gentle kiss on her lips.

In time that you're laughing at how bold you two felt to indulge sexual needs in the most unsuitable context, Kuma leads you two out of the forest trees and to the cliff.

Jennie hops off first to help you on your shaking legs. She ties Kuma's ropes to a tree, then beckons you to lie on the quilt she spreads on the short grass.

The white clouds cover the sky in beautiful shapes and forms, many of which you and Jennie discern to be cats and dogs, lions and bears, fishes and turtles, Orange and Luca, even Sehun and his baby face.

"That's definitely a giraffe." you point at the obvious shape of it. The neck, the ears, the hair- 

"No..." Jennie trails, trying to pinpoint something else, "That's Sir Joo-young!" she riddles out in all her seriousness and you burst in a fit of laughter. "You don't think so?" she turns to you, joining in the uncontrollable giggles.

And it goes on like this. As the clouds change color, to the pink and orange skies of the South, you and Jennie share bizarre, but hilarious jests and shenanigans.

You laugh endlessly at Jennie's wit.

You're rapt in her presence.

Wholeheartedly, you cannot deny it.

You are in love with Jennie.

"I wish I could stay here forever." she sighs.

You're in love with Jennie and you don't want to be sorry for it.

"You have beautiful skies in the South, Rosie."

You don't want to apologize for loving her in this illicit affair.

"Incredibly beautiful."

But you will be sorry for the hurt it will cause.

It could be ruinous. A destructive love.

"I adore you, Jennie Kim." you're sorry for saying it out loud. You know very well it always hurts more when it is said out loud.

She turns to you with a meek smile, caught by surprise of your sudden compliment. You bask in the complexion of her face under the sunset's lights.

She's incredibly beautiful to you.

"The things you do to me, Park..." Jennie whispers, brushing your hair from your face to cup your cheek. She inches closer, and your vision of her blurs when she rests her forehead to yours. You close your eyes. You waver inside thinking of what she might say next.

It's been meandering in you- she loves me, she loves me not.

You want, but she can't— she shouldn't—

"I can't even think straight when I'm with you..." she strokes your lips lightly, and you press a kiss on the palm of her hand. She's just so soft.

Jennie pulls back and you open your eyes to her endearing ones.

Nothing else is said.

Because she leans in and she kisses you deeply. She inhales you, and you force yourself closer to her.

Nothing else needs to be said, because you both know not to say it out loud.

•••

   Through the vestibule, down the corridors, up the stairs—you speak, but you're silenced to their ears. The unfamiliar faces of the palace guards lead Doctor Moon through the west wing, but Doctor Moon, he's young. He's young with a clean cut beard and dark brown hair, bigger glasses and a sharper jaw.

The trouble and distress on his manly face is sparking the urgency in you. "What's going on?" you ask again, but you are ignored once more, "Doctor Moon please" you reach for his arm, but can't keep a grip.

They turn down the corner and you come to a halt when you see your father. You lose your breath when he looks up.

He's much younger before your eyes. "Father?" His hair longer and messily combed back- he's in his favorite pajamas, a pair he no longer wears. His frame is sturdier and eyes unwrinkled, but they hold great worry and fear in them.

"Please, do something." he pleads as he advances with Doctor Moon in the quarters.

"Wait" you run down the hall, "Stop" the guards are closing the doors!

You run faster, but not fast enough- the hall is shrinking to size— You squint your eyes to the dim room— you don't believe what you see—

"W-Wait—" you want to see her, "Mother!" please let me see her—

   A hulking cry comes out of your chest—

"Rosie"

You open your eyes, heaving for air. A great heaviness sits on you and you can't get up.

"Hey, look at me"

You can't breathe

"Suho, hurry with some water"

Your eyes are blurry and everything is spinning

"It's Jisoo, hey, look at me"

It's too much you can't— Please you can't breathe—

Your back is lifted off the bed and rested against the headboard. Your hands find a grip on Jisoo, pulling into her- you're panting too quickly, short of breath and still dizzy, but your awareness starts to settle in as you look around the bright room.

You're awake and "It was just a dream" Jisoo says, stroking your head to stop your trembles. Your mind is scattered and pieces of what you had just seen flash by in fragments, too hazy and vague.

You're sweating from head to toe- the cold sweats- and your mouth is dry like you've run a marathon.

"You're alright, Rosie, calm down."

You look to the left of you and it's space is empty. Your disordered thoughts lead to Jennie and you wonder where she's gone.

"The water, Your Highness."

She was right here when you fell asleep

"Drink this, Rosie"

   It takes moments for you to register what had just happened. It was a passing dream, short-lived in an old memory you were never part of. You wonder how you could have made it all up in your head- you don't even remember how young Doctor Moon used to look when you were only a child.

Neither have you ever seen mother so pale.

"You okay?" Jisoo asks, not having left your side. She wouldn't be able to anyway with the tight grasp you still have on her hand.

"It was awfully real." you say, voice hoarse and worn out. And as best as you can, you tell your friend of what you saw, what looked like moments before your mother's demise, or what was too late to save of her from the illness. It is the first dream of mother that isn't from childhood.

Both of you don't know what to make of it, blaming that the mind indeed has a mind of its own.

Forget it, you think, it is not and was never real to you.

"I'm sorry, I'm a mess." you apologize, pulling out of Jisoo's embrace to sit up and straighten yourself. You run your fingers through your hair and palm your face.

"I was just about to wake you up when I heard you scream. You gave Suho a terrible fright, in fact."

"He didn't jump and hit the ceiling did he?" you run your hand over the space Jennie occupied last night. You wonder what time she slipped out.

"Nearly." Jisoo chuckles and stands from the bed. "You should rest today. Let's skip our writing lessons."

You disagree with the proposal. You need the time and help to formulate your speech. You've only done little to no progress.

"If you feel like backing out, I won't hold it against you." she says, opening your closet to pick out a dress for the day, but you resort to just a t-shirt and jeans. She keeps you company while you get ready, doing well in clearing your mind and loosening the tension of your body that you awoke with.

She helps you recollect yourself before you go down for breakfast, before pretending like you've had a swell morning in front of Jennie and to your surprise, your father.

"I've just finished catching up to speed with all the pre-coronation ball preparations. To be candid, I'm impressed with your organization and well thought plans, Roseanne." father says once you all sit down for the meal.

"T-Thank you, father." you stutter, with a pinch of shock by his compliment.

You look to Jennie and she smiles proudly at you.

"I do suppose Ms. Kim has read the program to you."

"She has."

"Then you must know that I've picked three suitors for you to dance with during the waltz." he says, and the smile on Jennie's face falters. Her eyes shift down to the jam and toast on her plate.

"S-Suitors?" you turn to your father and his face retorts at your question.

"You won't be dancing by yourself, isn't that right? Of course, you will be waltzing with noble men. Seriously, Roseanne, what is it with these non-sensible questions-"

"It's just that..." your stomach tightens. There's no going back once your tongue slips.

"What is it?" father demands in annoyance.

Jennie looks up at you waiting for what you will say next.

"I'm not interested." you blurt.

"I beg your pardon?"

Jennie silently shakes her head at your statement, eyebrows creased in confusion.

"I-I'm not—"

"This is not up for debate." he snarls, "You are going to entertain the three men and you will have an enjoyable night at the ball with each of them, do you understand me?"

You can't tear your eyes off of Jennie, but she can't even keep her gaze on you longer than a second.

"Are you even—"

"Yes, father." you say, "I understand." even if it is against your will.

He sighs deeply in his irritations and that puts the talk about the event from your father to rest for the duration of the meal.

When he excuses himself to work, Jennie finally lifts her head from her plate. "What was that all about?" she asks, annoyance etched in her tone. You wonder if it's because of father's decisions or you submitting to him.

You're wrong about both.

"Why would you say you aren't interested?" she asks.

"Because I'm not."

"Why not?"

"I'm not looking for a man." you say, brutally honest.

And Jennie knows why, but she shakes her head at this, "Not when it is your father setting you up with one." she says seriously, "Three to be exact." but looks at you like it hurts her to say it. "Don't do that"

"Don't do what, Jennie? Reject a man I do not love?" you counter, and you will repeat it again and again until she understands what you are trying to say- you don't want anyone else.

Jennie looks down and rubs her eyes, sucking in a breath. You don't mean to upset her.

"It doesn't matter anyway," you state, "you heard my father, it's not up for debate." too, upset with yourself for not standing your ground.

"I'm sorry, Rosie, I didn't mean to be rude." she says, reaching for your hand and rubbing her thumb over it.

You kiss the back of her hand to let her know you take no offense, "I'm sorry, too.".

After a long pause, she opens up another conversation. She asks if you had slept well.

"I looked for you when I woke."

Jennie's smile is brought back at that. "I knew Suho would be at his post by six-thirty. I transferred to my room before then."

•••

   After a morning walk and a light lunch, you separate from Jennie to begin writing with Jisoo. You're cooped up in the library with her all afternoon, finally finished composing the introductory paragraph and listing down a series of reasons why you are so blessed to be entitled with the throne. And afterward, when the next section of the speech calls for the duties you wish to pursue as Queen, you find yourself falling short.

"You need to assure the people. Speak of your visions and the missions you have to help the kingdom thrive." Jisoo says, writing down the words, visions and missions on the blackboard.

You look at the clean sheet of paper in front of you. It is bound for a list of great possibilities.

"What you say in this part of the speech is crucial. You need your people to trust you."

A list of promises.

"Roseanne,"

Promises you might not be able to keep.

"are you still with me?" Jisoo snaps her fingers in front of you.

You look to Jisoo, your face as blank as the paper. She sits beside you, questioning your silence.

You swallow through your worry. "I don't want to lie, Jisoo."

"Lie? What part of this is untrue?"

"If I—"you take in a breath, a surge of realization dawning on you, "If I do fall ill to the Marcra, how can I keep my promises?" you ask, truly looking for an answer because you don't know what to do. You wouldn't know what to do if the time comes.

Jisoo speaks softly, "I know I'm your mentor," though, with a sadness to her tone, "but please don't ask me that.". She stands from her chair and walks back to the blackboard, "I can't even bare to think of it." and starts writing numbers one through ten down the board.

•••

"You're awfully quiet, Rosie." Jennie points out, and you can't deny you were lacking on your side of conversation during dinner. "Are you okay?"

You smile at the brunette's concern, "I'm fine, love" and take her arm with yours to bigger swings. "Writing down all the words in my head has made me a little tired, I guess."

"Do you want to turn down early?" she stops in her tracks.

"Nope," you say, luring her into the garden's entrance and to the rather grand maze. "I wanna walk with you a little longer."

She doesn't refuse and gladly enters the maze with you, but you can't help but notice that the inner lights are turned off. The only light for path are the surrounding posts outside of the maze.

"I think it's rather romantic." Jennie skips ahead of you, her floral dress flaunting well with the scene.

"You're not afraid of the dark?"

"Are you?" she smirks, going down the corner before you even reach it.

"Jennie" you jog up, but she's out of sight when you turn. The maze is a little eerie at this time of night. "J-Jen?" you inch down the stretch, slight hesitation to your movements as you peer through the side paths. You almost laugh at how quick your tough exterior has been stripped by the darkness. "O-Okay, I— I know what you're doing." you say, clearing your throat to mask the suspenseful nerves growing in you. You snap your head behind you just to be sure she isn't—

"Boo!"

You shriek in fear— "For the love of— Jennie!" you slap her arm, your cheeks heating up as she laughs at the jump scare she gave you. "It's not funny" you pout, chills still creeping on your back. You're shaking on your knees.

"I'm sorry, baby," she holds your flushed face, still in a fit of giggles, "you're just so cute, I couldn't help it." her adorable thrills make up for the fright and you find yourself laughing too. Jennie pushes you to the tall bush, obscuring you both from any angle of the palace windows that might see you. She grins and kisses you lightly.

It definitely makes up for the scare.

"Am I forgiven?" she raises a brow.

"Hmm..." you place your hands on her waist, inching her nearer, "Perhaps another kiss will let this one slide."

That kiss goes on longer than the previous. A little rougher and messier. You both fight for dominance, trace each other's mouths just before pulling away for air. Then you smash your lips on hers again, pressing her up against you. Jennie runs her fingers through your hair, and she gasps when snake your hand down her thigh to squeeze.

But before this could escalate, Jennie pulls back and puts a distance between you two. She brings her fingers to her swollen lips and smiles sheepishly, "No more sex today."

"What?" your shoulders droop. "But—"

"No buts" she holds a finger up and straightens her dress before walking, leaving you standing by the bush and still aching to touch her.

You thought you could make her feel good tonight after she did you earlier.

"Coming, Park?"

Groaning, you drag your feet to her. You give her the side-eye as you walk through the maze and she only chortles at this.

"Let's turn down here, this is the short cut." you take her hand in yours and lead her down a narrow path. It has the most twists and turns and you make sure to go down all the right ones. The small spaces leave little room for light, too, making it difficult to discern the signs you've memorized as the way back.

"Maybe it's this way." she tugs you to the left.

"I don't think so, Jen—"

Your gasp is silenced by Jennie's hand over your mouth.

"christ—" she whispers, shuffling you both behind a bush, because oh god you can't believe what you just saw— "Ah" she winces when you bite her hand off, "Rosie what the fuck" because you just have to be sure.

You peer over the bush and your jaw drops— panic surges through you— ice cold rigors because oh my god Lisa and Sehun—

"Mhmm" Lisa and Sehun kissing!

You don't want to believe what is unfolding right in front of you because you thought you read the signs— Lisa said they were good friends- just some fun company but he has his leg between hers and oh god they're—

"Let's go, Rosie"

You're torn away from the inconceivable scene and it is just so outrageous it shakes you to the bone- Lisa lied to you and Lisa never lies— you can't even come to a profound thought to what just happened as you're being dragged back into the palace.

•••

"They are our friends, Rosie— Lisa is your best friend goddamn it"

You know that, and that's what is making all of this much, much worse because "You know who my father is, Jennie- there is nothing I can do."

"For god's sake—" she expires, angry and frustrated. Her hard cold eyes pin on you and it sends fearsome shivers down your spine, "Why can't you take a stand, Rosie, why?" she has never yelled at you like this before.

"It's just the law here in the South, Jennie- Subjects of the Royal family of Southern Marcadia are prohibited from fraternizing or indulging in any committed relationship with subjects of the Royal family of Northern Marcadia, otherwise—"

"So you're just going to have Lisa and Sehun whipped- have two of our best friends whipped to humiliation in front of all your people because of love- is that it?" she strides toward you, flared in infuriation and it shakes you inside.

You back away, "It-It won't come to that." they just need to separate and no one will catch them and- and they need to stay away from each other if they can't hide their feelings—

"And what if it does come to it?" she rebukes. "If they get caught- if someone else had caught them tonight, what will you do?" she asks, eyes needled in the way she looks at you because she already knows the answer by the thin slate of tears filling in yours.

You turn away because you can't look at her in this sinking guilt. There's just nothing you can do come the circumstance. You may be the princess, but you are just the King's daughter first.

"And what will you do about us?" she asks, wretched in desolation- it rips right through you, "How are we any different?" tearing you apart because you just don't know.

"We're talking about Lisa and Sehun here"— please don't make it about us

"Are you going to let your father step on us too?"

"My father is not the only one who will disprove of us, Jennie and you know that." you say, and the dead silence of your bedroom forces her to gulp down the truth of your words- that her parents will be against this just as much as your father, just as much as both of the kingdoms.

You are Princesses— Women— you are outlaws.

"We shouldn't even be doing this, Jennie" you knew from the start that you can't be together- it's not written in the stars your forefathers claimed to mark destiny. You knew from the start that this love was unsure. Tomorrows with Jennie are blurry enough and a blind future is too scary to think about.

You both avoided the questions and the uncertainty of it all. You carried double sided emotions- walked on cloud nine, but fell to the dead sea when you thought of everything that can't be.

It's true you don't want anybody else because you only want Jennie, you won't apologize for it, but you knew from the start that there are impediments between the lines of the story you want to write with her.

Perhaps this is where the story should end. Stop playing with hearts and twisting morals- you cannot hide from the gods.

"I'm sorry, Jennie" you don't mean to make your favorite eyes cry. "I'm so sorry" but you would rather hurt the both of you now than endure the unbearable suffering that would come with this entanglement.

Jennie blinks her tears to fall and if your eyes weren't glassy in your heartache then you would tell if she were sorry too, just by the way she looked at you.

But you can't be sure, because Jennie walks to the door and she leaves without another glance.