Chapter 32

You guys are so demanding!😂 But since I love you, here's the next chapter.😙💋❤

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Perrie's POV

What happened last night really went out of hand. I didn't mean to yell at Jade, I just had to make her stop. I was shocked, and I don't know why I said that. But it's the truth, right? She's not my girlfriend. But after I said that, mixed emotions flashed through her eyes. Sadness, anger, fear, longing... she looked so vulnerable, but I had to stop myself from running to her and hug her tight, and tell her I'm sorry and that I didn't mean what I said. That's what my heart wanted me to do, but my brain told me the opposite. And of course I followed my brain, just like I followed it when I woke up on her bed.

-Flashback-

Sometime at dawn, I was awaken by an insistently full bladder. I carefully extracted myself from Jade's arms, I stood up and padded to the bathroom. On my way back to bed, I paused, captivated by the sight of her sleeping form visible in the soft spill of light from the windows. She was on her stomach, facing away from me, one arm curled above her head and the other under her pillow. We'd kicked most of the covers off during the night, exposing the long expanse of her back. I stared at her in wonder. She was astonishing. Fierce and gentle, delicate and strong, a perfect fusion of sharp angles and soft curves, and truly the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I sighed softly when I realized that I was in deep, deep trouble. When I thought before about my feelings for Jade, I'd been unsure and 'love' was not the word to explain my emotions. But now I was sure. Sometime during the night, the feelings I had for Jade had intensified into something very deep, very strong, and so frightening. I had no doubts about it now - I am in love with her.

I dropped heavily on the chair she had pulled out last night and sighed again. I sat for a long time, contemplating the goddess in front of me and the many ways she could hurt me. She makes me happy and I should enjoy this for as long as it lasted. She made me feel so much, and no one had ever made me feel that way before. She made me forget everything outside of her bedroom, she made me forget all the reasons for whatever we have been doing. All that mattered then was just me and her, the way she holds me with care and gentleness, the looks of her eyes, and the way she made me feel loved. But I'm scared. What if everything was just part of our own little show? What if she doesn't feel the same way? What if she leaves me after the agreement's done? Dammit! She would either be the best thing that ever happened to me, or a spectacular crash and burn that would fuck me up for a good long time. I need to go. I don't think I can handle it if she woke up and the looks of her eyes from last night were no longer there. I need to save myself before it was too late. I grabbed my clothes, put them on quickly and walked to the door. I glanced over at Jade one last time before I walked out of her room.

-End of flashback-

I've been trying to contact her but she's not answering my calls and responding to my texts. I was worried because after I yelled at her she run away. Did I hurt her? So many thoughts came flooding my mind and I don't know what to think anymore. Then someone clearing their throat snapped me out of my reverie.

"Pez, there's something I need to tell you." Jesy said as she sat down next to me on the couch at my living room.

"Yeah, what is it?" I asked, glancing at my phone, hoping Jade had finally decided to respond to me.

"Paul just called and he told me that Jade had just terminated the agreement." she said hesitantly.

"She what?!" I exclaimed. Did I heard that right?

"She terminated the agreement. You two no longer have to pretend to be dating." she explained.

"But why? Is it because of last night? I thought you and Paul made it sure that nothing about what happened come out to the media." I blabbered. Oh no!

"What happened last night did not came out, the management made sure of it. But as to why Jade decided on that, I don't know. She didn't tell Paul her reasons." she said.

"And what did the management said? Did they agreed?" I asked, panic surged through me.

"Well, Jade made her decision final. The management can't do anything about it. But they think that the breakup will catch a lot of attention from the press, and that it will still help with your exposure." she rolled her eyes at that. Well, that's all they ever wanted, right?

"Do you think I should talk to her?" I looked at her expectantly.

"To be honest, yes. I think it would be better if you two talked. I called Leigh-Anne. She said Jade was pretty beat up." she held my hand in reassurance. Jade was beat up? By what?

Okay, then I guess I'll talk to her. But how? I looked at my phone again and checked. Nothing. She's ignoring me. How can I possibly talk to her?

~~~

The next day, I decided to go to Jade's office. If she was trying to ignore my calls and messages, I don't think she can ignore me now that I am here to talk to her face-to-face. I walked up to her office and saw Leigh-Anne by the door. She immediately step out and shut the door behind her.

"Hi, Leigh!" I greeted her and she smiled at me.

"Hey, Perrie. What are you doing here?" she glanced to the door as if to check something.

"I'm here to talk to Jade. Is she available?" I asked.

"I uhm- I'll check. Be right back." she said and hurriedly went inside the room.

I stayed outside, waiting, I heard some mumbling from inside. And after a while, Leigh-Anne walked out of the room.

"She'll be out in a sec." she said and went to her desk.

The door opened and there walked out Jade, in all of her glory. Although she looked different, like she was tired or haven't had enough sleep. And she avoid looking at me.

"Hi, Jade. I think we need to ta-" she cut me off.

"Yeah, follow me." she said in a stern voice and walked pass me.

I followed her at she led me through the halls of her building until we reached a balcony. She opened the door for me and I stepped out, she followed right after. She continued to walk, then stopped by a bench. She gestured me to sit and I sat down beside her.

"Jade, I-" she cut me off again.

"Perrie, I know you're going to apologize for yelling at me. There's no need. I totally understand. I over reacted, I shouldn't have done what I did. I know you were just trying to stop me." she said, looking down the floor.

"Jade, but why were you ignoring my calls and messages? I thought you were mad." I asked.

"You were the one who first ignored my calls and messages, remember?" she scoffed. I frowned.

"I know, I'm sorry. I was just..." I trailed off. What was I suppose to say? That I was scared? That I'm a coward?

"It's okay Perrie, you don't need to explain. But will you answer this question truthfully?" she asked and finally looked at me.

"Yeah?" I glanced at her nervously.

"Do you like him?" she looked at me straight in the eyes, and in that moment - that moment before the mask dropped back into place - I saw the flash of longing and sadness.

"I-uh... I-" What the hell Perrie? You bite your tongue?

"I told you before that if you found someone that you like, I will let you go." she said seriously, and the looks of her eyes from our night together was no longer there. All I can see was coldness.

"The way you two were with each other at the party, it was clear that you like him. You didn't even stop him from touching you..." she continued and looked back down the floor.

She was so distant. This was not the Jade I was with that night we made love. Was it really making love for her? Or just a fancy sex? Maybe my decision to leave her that morning was right. All of it was just part of our show. She doesn't feel the same way. And now she decided to terminate the agreement, she's going to leave me. I was right!

"So tell me, Perrie." she looked back at me, this time her face held no more emotions. And I decided to say what she wanted to hear, even if it wasn't the truth.

"Yes, Jade. I like him."

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So they love each other, they're just both stupid enough to know it. How was it? Don't worry, we are all hurting.😢 Please leave a comment, and vote if you liked this chapter. Thanks, my loves! 💋💋💋

- R xx