25. From The Start

From the very start Daryl had been the person who kept me going. After I lost my parents, after I lost everyone and was left to defend myself. He took over my dreams, he spoke to me in them, he comforted me. He kept me going. He was the one thing that I held onto, even when I thought he was just something in my head. When I believed he wasn't a real person. I couldn't figure out why he was in my dreams, I still can't but for whatever reason he was and it lead me here. And now that I know him, I love him. How can I let him go? How can I just give up. How can he? His the reason I'm here today, and if he shuts me out again. I don't know what I'll do.

My thoughts continued to distract me, my expression must have shown how badly I was hurt and worried, I felt Daryl's hand squeeze mine and then I felt his stare. His blue eyes staring into mine like he knew exactly what I was thinking and what I needed to hear.

"Sorry. I'm still getting used to this" he mumbled but didn't drop his gaze.

"Daryl" I whispered and he nodded for me to continue, I cleared my throat as we continued to walk behind Rick and the rest "I love you, and I need you. Even before I met you I dreamt about you, not just the boyfriend like you. I dreamt about you. When I saw you at the prison I was so shocked because it was you. The man I had dreamt about for nights on end, the man that kept me going when I had every reason to give up, and today you're still that reason I keep fighting and surviving. When I first met you, you were a jerk. And I wanted to give up, because if the one reason I kept surviving wasn't worth holding onto why was I still trying? But it didn't take me long before I realised that you are worth holding onto, that I love you so much and I want to spend every moment I can with you but I need you to not shut me out, don't let being with them change you back to the shy, shut off Daryl because even if I'm madly inlove with him I want you, the Daryl that loves me back and isn't afraid to express it."

He stared at me a short moment before he turned his gaze away and looked straight at Rick, I almost gave up when he looked back to me. We kept at our pace, keeping close to Rick and the others. "Bella, as crazy as that sounds I don't want to get into it. Maybe one day but right now I just want to focus on now, not the past or the future. Just now. And I don't want you to worry, I'm not going to shut you out again, I promise" He quickly kissed me before we sped our pace and joined the others, Rick explaining which way we were going. Michonne mentioned something about train tracks but we joined just in time to miss the beginning.

"Alright, we'll follow the tracks to this safe place." Rick nodded and glanced to us for approval. Daryl gave a nod and I followed along, knowing it didn't matter where we went. There was no safe place, there was nowhere we could settle down without worries. But as long as I was with Daryl.

"By the looks of the maps it shouldn't take longer then two days, maybe three?" Michonne said, leading the way toward the tracks her and Carl had found on their run.

"And you trust this? I mean, we could be walking into anything?" I said, there was something eerie about this. My gut was telling me we shouldn't follow the maps. But I couldn't argue with the rest who shrugged and basically said 'What have we to lose?' Was it only me who feared maybe. Our lives? But I didn't argue I just followed beside them, keeping my hand close to my knife ready for anything.

We walked for a couple more hours until the sun fell, and night came. Carl protested against walking all night and we set up camped beside the tracks, only just in the trees. The night was cold and we slept close together, I snuggled myself against Daryl who wrapped his arms protectively around me and filled me with that familiar safe feeling I always felt in his arms. I felt Michonne close behind me, and the rest huddled together, keeping warm throughout the cold night. I slept for a few hours before Daryl's restless sleep annoyed me, I pecked his lips to gain his attention.

"What's wrong. Why aren't you sleeping?" I asked, though I was expecting a stupid answer.

"Well, other than the obvious I'm just worried. I don't like the sound of this place, it sounds to good to be true. But it's worth a shot right?" He whispered, nuzzling his cold nose against my cheek which his breath had kept warm.

"Yeah, I know. I feel the same, I don't trust it but the others seem to" I sighed, half smiling as his beard scratched against my cheek.

"Get some more sleep, we have a long day tomorrow" he said and closed his eyes, I cuddled myself as close to him as possible, lightly rubbing his back as I draped my arm over him.

"Only if you sleep too" I whispered back, waiting a few moments until I noticed his even breathing, knowing it was still a restless sleep but it was better then nothing.

Morning came slow, and I failed to fall back asleep after my awakening with Daryl. Only being able to faintly sleep or lay awake in a dreamless daze. The sun was bright as it rose, already I knew it was going to be a hot day. We packed up our camp and headed to the tracks to continue the first full day of our travel. Hoping to get as much in as possible before night fall came. We ate on the go, only stopping a handful of times and whenever we saw a chance to collect more water. We had plenty but no one really knew when that plenty would turn into nothing. We continued to see signs, each one showing us where we stood and how much further we had to go. We came across no walkers until we found a few dead ones which put us on alert, seeing how fresh the blood was smeared into the ground. But that wasn't what shocked us most.