Anew

"Wanyin... I'm sorry..." he said. "I'm sorry..." he cried. Nothing really happened between him and Jin Guangyao. What his mistake is – "I'm sorry... for doubting my feelings towards you..." he said as he cried on his knees. "I've failed you..." he added. Because of a moment of hesitation, he fell in the abyss, and pulled both Jiang Cheng and Jin Guangyao with him. A wrong decision cost three people's life. One died, while the other two lived but their life is filled with pain. It was all because of him.

His cries filled Jiang Cheng's room.

"You're so noisy."

"I'm sor... ry – " Lan Xichen said before he froze. He raised his head and saw Jiang Cheng's back is on him. He felt his chest hurt again. That back... he thought. It's what made him realize his feelings towards Jiang Cheng. The reason he approached him is because he saw his lonely back. The reason he always cared for him is because he saw his empty back. The reason he liked him is because he saw his resolute back. But, also because of it he doubted his feelings.

True, he liked him that's why he kisses him. However, how can he love a person just because he stared at their back? The answer: it's because you want them to look at you.

Jiang Cheng had always has his gaze lowered, thus their eyes do not meet. That's why, he felt that he doesn't love him. He felt more comfortable with Jin Guangyao's company than Jiang Cheng's. He felt, there was always distance between him and Jiang Cheng even if they are in a relationship.

Thus, that day, to confirm his feelings, he asked Jin Guangyao to hug him. He had prepared to break up with either Jin Guangyao or Jiang Cheng. He didn't expect for them two to break up with him. One forcefully broke up with him because it was his mistake. The other one he asked to break up with him to not add for his mistakes.

What he didn't expect the most is to regret when he saw Jiang Cheng's back again. This time, he had fell in love with him. But it was too late, since Jiang Cheng now left him. He was so stupid. All he had wanted to do is to see Jiang Cheng's face. However, the cruel truth slapped him in the face – Jiang Cheng doesn't want to see him anymore.

After he explained himself to Jiang Cheng, a long silence fell between them. "Is that all?" Jiang Cheng asked.

"... yes." Lan Xichen answered as he lowered his head. "Nothing really happened between me and Ah Yao. I just hugged him to confirm my feelings." He said.

"Did you?" Jiang Cheng asked.

"Yes." Lan Xichen answered. When he didn't hear Jiang Cheng speak again, he bitterly smiled. What does he expect? He thought. For Jiang Cheng to forgive him?

As Nie Huaisang said, forgiveness will be given to those who deserve it. And he (LXC) didn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve Jiang Cheng's forgiveness.

He took a deep breath when he felt his heart became heavy. "... I'll be taking my leave." He said after a while. He stood and then slowly walked towards the door. Every step of him is as heavy as lead. Just as he reached the door, he finally heard Jiang Cheng speak again.

"Why do you call me 'Wanyin'?" Jiang Cheng asked. His voice low and his back is still on Lan Xichen.

Lan Xichen stopped by the doorway before he slowly turned to Jiang Cheng. Then, he smiled. "I want us to start anew." He answered.

Jiang Cheng's ears are red.

"You idiot..." Jiang Cheng cried after he slapped Lan Xichen because he was startled by his sudden proposal. "Does it hurt?" he asked. His voice is laced with worry and he carefully touched Lan Xichen's cheek.

Lan Xichen chuckled as he snuggled his cheek on Jiang Cheng's warm palm. "It's fine." He said. "Losing you is more painful." He told him, which made Jiang Cheng blush. "So, I'll be fine, as long as you won't leave me again." He said as he opened the ring box. "Wanyin... will you be mine again?" he asked.

Jiang Cheng's tears fell as he leaned down and hugged Lan Xichen. "Yes!" he answered as he kissed him.

Lan Xichen smiled as he wore the ring on Jiang Cheng's finger before he hugged him tight and kissed him back. Finally... he thought.

Finally – Jiang Cheng thought.

We tore at each other's defenses, and be with each other again.

(A/N: now it ends! Please look forward to the extras. It'll alleviate the pain in your heart <3 P.S.: the extras are like bloopers. XD I always write this after I'm done with the main chapters.)