Ch 124

Looking back, the day wasn't as bad as I initially thought. It felt strangely comforting to converse with them as if nothing had happened. 

Itachi was quiet for the most part, offering only hums to signal his thoughts, whether in agreement or disagreement. 

Kisame, on the other hand, was the talkative one, sharing stories of past battles while I laughed and asked questions. 

I found it fascinating to hear about the Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist. Though he recounted his experiences, there were things left unsaid—though I knew that well enough. Still, I kept a mask of ignorance on, letting him talk without pushing. 

"What about you? Any tales of the ninja world?" Kisame asked, his humor darker, relishing stories of both folly and action. It was new to me, but oddly welcome. 

"I'm not sure. A lot comes to mind, but I've never put it into words." 

I wasn't one to share my past; my experiences were mine alone, not for others to hear. But then again, tomorrow I'd meet the Leaf ninja. 

They would definitely find a way to make me talk, one way or another. The thought made me uneasy, but I couldn't escape what was coming. 

I hesitated for a moment, but then pushed away any discomfort I felt. 

"But sure," I said. 

What should I share? 

What stories wouldn't hit too close to home for both of us? 

Nothing about the Akatsuki, nothing about the Uchiha massacre or Obito. Would Orochimaru also count? 

What could I say about him? 

Most of my experiences revolved around those things I just listed. Anything else felt insignificant. 

But whatever. I pushed the doubts aside. 

"The first thing that comes to mind is when I was with Sasori and Deidara." I glanced away, pretending to think about how to phrase it. 

"It wasn't easy escaping them. At least one of them was always by my side, and Sasori kept a close watch on me." I shrugged like it didn't matter. Like I didn't have days where I was actually scared. 

Kisame let out a low whistle, clearly impressed by my story. "Sasori, huh? I mean, he was pretty vigilant." 

I scoffed, quickly clearing my throat as I tried to play it cool. "Annoyingly so."

Kisame's laughter was deep and rich. "And how did you manage to pull that off?" he asked, clearly intrigued. 

I gave him a dry chuckle in return, "you know, that's a dangerous request to ask," I said, half-amused by the question. 

Kisame's grin widened, there was a certain respect in his eyes. "That's exactly why I like it," he responded, his voice laced with a teasing edge. 

I rolled my eyes at his comment, momentarily forgetting that I was speaking with someone as unpredictable as him. 

But it didn't matter. In this moment, I could relax. I leaned back, feeling the tension lift from my shoulders. 

"Well, I had Sasori show me his body," I started, "It didn't really have much to do with how I escaped, but I still consider it an accomplishment. But, as I subtly taunted him, I made my move. I ran like hell, evaded Deidara's explosions, fought and defeated one of Sasori's puppets, and then outsmarted them all before managing to outrun them." 

It was a lot to explain, but I gave him the gist of it. I didn't have time to dive into all the details, but the core of the story was there. 

Kisame chuckled, clearly entertained. "Sounds like a real spectacle," he remarked. "You outsmarted both of them, huh? I've got to admit, I'm impressed." 

He leaned forward slightly, a glint of admiration flickering in his eyes. "But I bet that didn't come without its risks." 

"Nothing worth doing ever does," I replied, locking eyes with him. "But it worked." 

Kisame's grin grew wider, and there was a mischievous edge to his voice. "You got a death wish or something? Taunting Sasori, of all people? That's some gutsy stuff. And I bet Deidara was about ready to blow his top after that little stunt." 

My voice remained casual, though there was a sharpness to it. "Most likely. But I'm not exactly eager to find out." 

Itachi, as usual, had been silent this entire time, though I could feel his gaze on me. I couldn't tell if it was disapproval or just his usual detached observation. 

Itachi was as enigmatic as ever, and his silence was something I was used to. Either way, I didn't want to dwell on it. 

Kisame chuckled again, clearly enjoying the conversation. His eyes gleamed with an unusual admiration. "A very amusing story," he said, shaking his head slightly. 

But then, an odd silence settled in the room. It wasn't awkward, per se, but there was a change in the air, like the mood had shifted. And just as abruptly as it had started, Itachi stood up and calmly made his way to the door. 

Without a word or a glance, he exited the room, leaving me momentarily speechless. 

"What was that about?" I asked, still trying to process what had just happened. 

Kisame smirked, clearly entertained by my confusion. "He's getting lunch," he explained, his tone light with amusement. 

I sighed, rolling my eyes in exasperation. "So, now that we're alone, what is it you wanted to say?" 

I wasn't a fool. I knew something had been planned—this moment, this conversation, it was all too intentional. 

Kisame had something in mind, something he wasn't telling me. He studied me for a moment, his grin softening just slightly, before he answered, "nothing in particular." 

I hesitated. There was more to it than that. I could feel it. "What is it, Kisame?" I pressed. "You want to speak up? Maybe offload some of your burdens? I'm no stranger to secrets, and I've got information on plenty of people. You're no different." 

My tone was blunt, almost mocking, I wasn't about to play games. I wasn't going to engage in endless small talk until we reached the point where I'd have to drag it out of him. 

If all he wanted was idle chatter, Itachi would still be here. Kisame studied me, a quiet understanding passing between us. 

He hadn't come here just to chat. Kisame stared at me for a long moment, his usual smirk fading, replaced by something unreadable, something I couldn't quite decipher. 

"I've always wondered..." Kisame began slowly, his voice uncharacteristically low and almost hesitant. "What you think of me." 

I could tell there was a weight to his words, something deeper than the usual banter. Something that hadn't been discussed before, something that lingered in the space between us like a silent question. 

The usual confidence he wore like armor seemed momentarily cracked, leaving behind something much more vulnerable. But it wasn't to a degree where I could take advantage of it. 

He put enough out there to show this wasn't the same, but not enough where he couldn't take it back. 

He was open with Itachi when he spoke of something similar, but when they had talked about it, it was more of a verbal battle, with different philosophies at play. 

But they both listened. With me, he was more soft with his approach. 

While he had given me many difficulties and hadn't really done anything for me, he still sees that I am like Itachi. Level minded and trustworthy for this conversation. 

"I know where this is going," I sighed. "What is my purpose and my position? You're trying to find out what I think of you to get an idea of yourself." 

Kisame didn't respond with words, with a smile, "you're too smart for your own good." 

I think it's the reason I'm still alive. But it will also be my downfall. It wasn't enough to save me. 

"Do you feel your impending doom?" I asked, an eyebrow quirked in slight seriousness. 

Kisame raised an eyebrow in return. "Is it that obvious?" 

I let out a soft laugh, trying to keep the mood light. "I'm surprised you've made it this long." 

He rolled his eyes, the playful energy returning to the room. "As is the rest of them." 

I nodded my head, musing of that one quote that so many have spoken before. Beware the old man in the land where men die young. 

It didn't matter how old they were—most didn't make it to adulthood, and fewer still made it to old age. Leaning back, I studied him. 

The usual playful Kisame hadn't disappeared entirely, and for reasons I couldn't quite grasp, I was glad he found something to like in me. 

"But for your question: what is our purpose?" I exhaled slowly, glancing away for a moment to collect my thoughts. "No one really knows," I said softly, choosing honesty over sympathy. 

"We're all just... figuring it out as we go. Everyone sees things differently, especially when it comes to themselves. You don't get to see who you really are, not completely. But that's life. And there are bigger things to worry about than whether or not you have a place or know exactly who you are. What matters is whether you can live with who you are, at the end of the day." 

...

Oh my God... 

I can't believe I just said that to him. 

I can feel the heat rising in my cheeks, my face burning as if it's on fire. I quickly avert my eyes, hoping he doesn't notice. I want to shrink into the background, wishing I could disappear, but all I can do is silently hope the moment passes. 

It was quiet for a beat before Kisame burst out laughing, unable to contain himself at the expression I was wearing. 

"Did not expect that," he chuckled, barely able to speak between laughs. "But I was serious... I am a terrible person," he added, slowly calming down. 

I didn't flinch at his words, though I knew they weren't said lightly. 

"You are," I said plainly. I wasn't going to sugarcoat it. 

"But you're not the only one. There are worse people out there, people who don't even care what they've done or who they've hurt. At least you're aware of it." 

We're all terrible people, but there are good ones. People have bad days, and people have good ones. 

I'm probably the cause of many others deaths. I could've done something, but I didn't. I was selfish from a young age, I only thought of myself and those close to me. I am not any better a person than Kisame. 

He gave me a sideways glance, nodding his head, "guess I've always been different." 

I deeply sighed from his words, hearing the double meaning. 

Why do people like to talk to me again? 

Why do I have to talk to people? 

Kisame wasn't just talking about his personality, which we all know wasn't going to change. But his strangely coloured skin. 

It's kind of known that he's insecure about it, but it's not like it's that bad. His blue skin, his gills, they were things I'd long gotten used to. It's honestly hard to imagine him without them. 

I didn't react immediately, instead choosing to think for a moment. Then I shrugged, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. "I don't care. It suits you." I gave him a half-smile. "It makes you... well, you." 

He blinked, surprised by my response, and then let out a slow, thoughtful chuckle. "You're an odd one, you know that? You don't care what anyone thinks." 

This whole conversation was him watching my reactions, while also listening to my words. My thinking process. From what I've seen, I think I passed whatever test he gave me. 

The silence that followed wasn't uncomfortable. It was calm, the kind of silence that meant things had been said that needed to be said. And for a brief moment, I could almost believe that Kisame was starting to find peace with himself. 

Or maybe it was me who needed this. 

A/n We don't really talk to Kisame much so I put this together for fun. Next chapter will be an Itachi one tho! Enjoy~