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Chapter thirty four

I wasn't trying to listen

The hallway was mostly empty — silent, except for the soft buzz of the lights overhead

I was just dropping off the classroom keys after staying back for a project I hadn't completed for the end of year

But as I walked past the teacher's office, the low voices coming from inside made me freeze

"You think just because you pulled her off that roof, it erases what you didn't do for your own brother?"

My heart stopped

"You should've known. Heeseung. He was your brother. He trusted you"

That voice was harsh. Angry. A man — maybe his dad

Heeseung's voice followed, quieter, raspy

"I didn't know. He didn't tell me how bad it was getting"

I moved closer, heart in my throat

"He said he was okay. I thought... I thought I still had time"

"Your mom can't even go near that rooftop anymore" the man snapped, "And now you're bringing strangers there? That girl? What if she jumped too?! You want to repeat history?"

"I didn't bring her there!" Heeseung yells out, "I found her"

"And she didn't" Heeseung said, "Because I got there in time"

Silence

"I wasn't there for him," Heeseung said, barely a whisper, "But I was there for her"

I couldn't breathe

I backed away slowly. My ears rang. I left the hallway without even knowing where I was going — until my feet led me to the very place I wasn't sure I was ready to return to

The rooftop

That same open sky

That same quiet breeze

That same ledge

I looked out over the city. Cold air stung my face

I remembered what it felt like that night. The heavy air. The hopelessness. The weight

And then — Heeseung's voice, "what the fuck are you doing?!"

It was the first time he ever spoke to me

The first time someone saw me

I sat on the ledge again — this time, not to jump, just to breathe

And then I heard the door creak open behind me

I turned, expecting silence

But I saw him

Heeseung

His eyes were red and puffy. Swollen. He hadn't cried — he was crying

He looked... lost

Without a word, he walked over to me and sat on the concrete

I stayed quiet. So did he.

But then his breath hitched, and he looked away, blinking hard

"I wasn't supposed to be late that day" he started, "He told me he wanted to show me something. Something he was working on. Some dumb playlist he made. He said to meet him up here"

His voice broke

"But I was busy — flirting with some girl. I thought he could wait five minutes"

I felt my throat tighten

"Five minutes" he whispered, pressing the heel of his palm to his eyes, "By the time I got here, he was already gone"

Tears streamed down his cheeks. But he didn't wipe them

"I remember looking over the ledge and just... nothing. He was just gone"

I moved closer, but still didn't speak

"I never got to say goodbye" he choked. "I never told him I was proud of him. Or that I was sorry. Or that I loved him. I just... saw the empty rooftop"

A wind passed between us

"And then... that night" he said, "When I saw you standing there"

I swallowed hard

"I swear to God, Haerin, I saw him. From behind, you looked just like him"

His voice trembled again

"I didn't save you because I'm a good person. I saved you because... I couldn't be the reason someone else lost their live"

"It's not your fault"

My heart shattered into a million pieces

Finally, I reached over and took his hand

He didn't pull away

"I didn't know" I whispered, "I'm so sorry."

He looked at me with tear-streaked cheeks, red eyes full of something I hadn't seen before in him: fear. Not of me — but of his own heart

"I think about that night every day" he said. "And how if I'd been any later... I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself"

I squeezed his hand

"You were on time for me" I whisper

We sat there in silence, fingers intertwined

The sky slowly turned darker, but neither of us moved

And in that moment, the rooftop — once a place of endings — became something else entirely

A beginning

"Fading petals always find their way back to the stem—because some stories, no matter how broken, finish where they first began"