Chapter 80

*Trigger warning!*

Esined

It was late at night and I had finally made it home. I noticed the lights were on as I approached the door. I could hear yelling from the inside, but I couldn't make out the words. I knew it was Mama and Erica.

I opened the door and entered a war zone that I wasn't prepared for.

My head was throbbing and my high was quickly blown.

I closed the door behind me and looked back and forth between them. I'd never seen them so angry before.

"Don wouldn't make me go through this!" Erica cried. "He wouldn't!"

"What's going on?" I asked.

They both grew quiet and folded their arms.

"Well? Is anyone gonna say something?"

Erica tapped her fingers on her arm and stared at mama.

"Now isn't the right time to discuss this," Mama said softly.

"Why not?" Erica questioned. "It's already the topic,"

"You and your smart mouth are going to drive me crazy,"

"You and your parenting skills have already drove me crazy,"

"Erica, stop it," I said. "Tell me what's going on,"

"There's a lot to be explained," She cleared her throat.

"Sit down. We can all talk it out,"

We all sat down, but Erica sat far away.

"Who wants to start?" I asked.

"I was staying with Don for a while. We always had family and friends over. One day, I was with someone who I thought was a friend..." Erica said. "She told me that her brother thought I was cute and I thought he was too. We became friends and he told me he just turned fifteen. We continued being friends, nothing was serious with us at all," her leg shook as she spoke.

"One day we were all playing seven minutes of heaven with friends and it landed on us two. We went into the the closet and nothing was going on. Then he decided to make a move, I guess. I told him I was too young and I only played because I didn't want the our friends laughing at or teasing me. I told him I didn't want to do anything, but he started pressuring me,"

I looked at her, already knowing where this was headed.

"So I told him he could kiss my cheek and that was it. He kissed my cheek and then he kissed my neck. I asked him to stop and he said it was just kissing. I told him I didn't want to and he told me that we might as well do something because we had five minutes left," she said.

"I told him no and I tried to stand up, but he pulled me back down to the floor. He pulled me into his lap and forced a kiss on me. I slapped him and he got mad. He said I thought you liked me, Erica. Why are you putting on the shy act now? I told him that I wasn't that kind of girl. I tried to leave again and he pushed me down,"

"I cried for help and I was fighting to get to the door. The other kids were on the outside of the door, laughing. I heard them saying Get the chair! Get the chair!" she sniffed. "I tried to open the door, but they wouldn't let me out. I told them I didn't want to play anymore. I said I wanted to go home,"

I wiped tears from my face as I listened to her.

"He pulled me back to the ground and started taking my clothes off of me," she got quieter. "He did what he wanted to do and when he finished, he pulled up his pants. He knocked on the door and they let him out. He told me that we should do it again sometime. I was in the corner with my knees up to my chest, crying," she said. "Nobody helped me and they all left. They left me by myself after I had asked for help," she put her head down.

I walked over to her and put my arms around her. "Erica... I'm so sorry that happened to you," I mumbled.

"I don't want this baby, Esined," she sobbed into my arms. "I don't want it. I'm only thirteen. Everyone's gonna laugh at and talk about me,"

My eyes grew slightly big. I was shocked to the point where I didn't speak for a moment.

I looked at my mama and she wiped tears from her face.

She left the living room and went to her room.

"Mama won't let me get an abortion. She says there's no doctors around that'd do it because of my age... She said she doesn't want anything to go wrong and I die or something," she sniffed. "I'd rather die than have this thing,"

I rubbed her back softly.

"I hate boys. I hate them! They say they like you and then they hurt you," she cried.

"I know,"

"I'm sorry about saying that I didn't like August earlier... I just, I know you both are, like, in love. I just don't want you to get hurt. I don't know August fully and I misjudged him. I'm sorry, Es,"

"It's okay, sis. It is. I understand completely,"

"When I think about what happened, I shut down. That's why I got distant earlier,"

I wiped her tears and continued rubbing her back.

Erica and I sat on the sofa. She cried into my arms until she fell asleep.

I couldn't sleep, even I wanted and needed to.

It was heartbreaking to know that some kids, that my little sister considered as friends, had set her up to be raped. Now she was thirteen and carrying a child.

My eye twitched at the thought of it.

The doorknob began to twist, breaking me from my thoughts. Brandon walked in.

"It's pretty late. Why are you up?" he asked, closing the door softly behind him.

"Can't sleep. Where were you?"

"With a few friends of mine," he said. "Is she feeling better?"

I shook my head no and he sighed.

"You know what's wrong?"

"Yeah, but it's not my place to speak on it,"

"I already know," he said. "It's horrible,"

"How do you know?"

"She was scared, so she came to me," he lifted Erica from my arms.

Erica was not a light sleeper, so she immediately woke up and began to panic.

"It's me, Brandon," he said quietly, calming her down.

She relaxed, wrappings her arms around his neck.

Brandon carried Erica to her room and I followed behind. He tucked her in and left her room. He closed the door and I sighed.

He saw my expression and opened his arms.

"Why did that have to happen to her?" I mumbled into his chest.

He rubbed my back. "I wish it didn't,"

"I hope those kids are put away. Damn demons,"

"And if they aren't, karma is a bitch,"

"Right," I said. "I need your advice,"

I wanted to switch the topic, just to get that off of my mind for a moment.

"Alright,"

Brandon and I went to my room and climbed out the window. We sat on the roof and I looked at the stars.

"What's up?" he asked.

"I was at the mall with Erica today. She told me that she didn't like August. We had a disagreement or whatever, ya know? She wanted to be home and alone. So, I went to August's house earlier. His brother, Travis, let me in. We were talking and I spoke with him about Erica disliking us together,"

"I can feel where this is headed," he said.

"So, he said that he doesn't like August and I together either. I'll admit, he made valid points on why he didn't like our relationship, but it seemed as if he was discrediting August. Of course, I defended my boyfriend,"

"Of course," he agreed.

"After that, he told me that I need to be with a man and not a boy. He told me that he can only be patient for so long,"

"Wait... Pause the story. That's not where I thought that was going," he shook his head. "He's been plotting for a while. Stay away from him,"

"Should I tell August?"

"Why wouldn't you?"

"I don't want there to be tension in their house. I think that August will think I led Travis on,"

"Forget the tension. Who cares about that? You not telling August is what's gonna make him think you led Travis on. Honestly, just take him in private and tell him. You need to let him know before he finds out on his own,"

"You're right. Thank you,"

"His brother is foul. That isn't brother. Who does that? All types of guy codes and boundaries were broken,"

"Right. That's was so wrong,"

"Never make a move on your brothers' girl. Stare all you want, but know your lane and stay in it. That's code, some say don't even look at their girl,"

"August is definitely the type to not want guys looking at me,"

"See," Brandon chuckled. "And August is a... hmm,"

I looked at Brandon, turning my head slightly.

"Let me choose my words carefully, because I know you'd push me off this roof,"

"Uh-huh," I laughed.

He chuckled. "Well, to put it simply... We all know August has-"

"Anger problems,"

"Yeah. I feel like he'd want to fight if he found out,"

"Me too. And that's what I don't want to happen,"

"Hmm. Maybe you should tell him when he comes over here. Don't tell him at his house,"

"Smart. Maybe we'll go on a date or something,"

"That's good too. Maybe he won't get upset in front of others. You know he doesn't like to be embarrassed,"

"Oh no, if August is gonna go off, he'll do it anywhere," I said. "He doesn't care. Once he's mad, he's mad,"

"Darn. Just be in private,"

"We will be,"

It was quiet for a while, but Brandon spoke.

"Are you guys wearing protection?" he asked randomly.

"We're not active," I admitted.

"Really?"

I laughed. "Why did you think we were?"

"Well, you both have a strong bond and- I don't know. Excuse my simple mind,"

"You're not simple minded," I said. "August and I are waiting until marriage,"

"Wow. That's a long ways away, but that's not a bad thing. Nothing wrong with waiting,"

"Eh, I guess,"

"Wait... Is he the one who wants to wait?"

I didn't know how to answer that. We both wanted to wait, but we both would have our days when we wanted to take that step.

"I mean, I do too, but... This is weird,"

We both began to laugh.

"It is," he agreed.

"We might as well finish the conversation since it's started," I shrugged.

"True,"

"Well, August is really intimate. Even if he doesn't like to admit it, he is. He took like a month or so to kiss me for the first time, so just imagine how long it'd take him to take that step. To him, the simplest things are intimate. Like holding hands. He told me that he thinks holding hands is very intimate,"

"It is,"

"I know. He doesn't like when I reject holding his hand,"

"Why do you reject it?"

"Because I get nervous," I admitted. "My palms get sweaty and- I don't know. It's corny,"

He laughed. "No it's not. He'd understand,"

"Eh, I guess," I shrugged. "I'm gonna talk to mama about the DNA tests tomorrow," I switched the topic.

"I'll be at work,"

"I know,"

"I thought we were gonna talk to her about it together?"

"I kinda wanna know how she'll react first. Then we can all discuss it together,"

"Okay, I guess that's alright,"

"Good then... I'm gonna talk to her about it in the morning before I go to work,"

"What time do you have to work?"

"Nine to six,"

"You should really be asleep,"

"I know," I yawned. "Ready to go back in?"

He nodded.

We climbed back into my window from the roof. I closed it and he told me goodnight.

"Goodnight," I said.

He closed my door lightly and I prepared for bed.

Once I got in bed, I went to sleep almost instantly.

3 am, August

I held my phone up ta my face, waitin' fa Esined to answer my call.

It was three in the mornin', but I couldn't sleep. I was thinkin' too much and I needed her ta calm me down.

"Babe, it's three in the morning," her voice was whiny and sleepy.

"I know. I'm sorry,"

"What's wrong?"

"I need ta be wit you right now,"

"Right now?"

"Can I come ova?"

"Mama yelled at me the last time I snuck you in,"

"Pooh," I cooed. "Please?"

"Fine. Come through the back door and park your car a few houses down,"

I smiled ta myself. "I'll see you in a lil bit,"

"Okay. Be safe,"

"I will," I hung up and got out of bed.

I grabbed my car keys and a hoodie. I slipped it ova my head and fixed it. I left my room quietly and went downstairs.

"Shit," I held my chest when I saw Travis in the kitchen. "Why are you up?"

"I couldn't sleep,"

"You good?"

"Not like you'd care if I was," he stood up and tossed the peels from his orange into the trash.

"Man, what did I eva do ta you?"

"You know what you did, and you know what you're doin',"

"You be trippin',"

"Just like you," he mumbled.

"Don't start wit me, bro," I warned.

"You the one who started. Ain't nobody tell you ta come in hea and talk ta me. You know I don't like you,"

"And I don't like you eitha, but you still my brotha and I care about you,"

Travis walked up ta me, standin' directly in front of me. He looked into my eyes. "I'm not yo brotha. You don't mean shit ta me. You ain't get dat hint yet?"

"Dats how it is now?"

"Dats how it's been. Neva liked you and I neva will,"

"Aiight, cool. Rememba dat,"

His shoulder brushed mine as he went upstairs.

I shook my head and left the house. I drove ta Esined's house.

When I got there, I parked a few houses away like she told me to. I went ta the back door and she was waitin' on me.

I smiled at her natural beauty.

She had bed hair and a bare face. She was wrapped up in her blanket, but her toes were peepin' out from da bottom.

"You so cute," I chuckled.

"Shh," she whispered.

I followed behind her and we tiptoed ta her room.

Esined closed the door and got into bed.

I removed my hoodie and shirt under it. I climbed into bed wit her and pulled her close ta me.

"Thank you," I said.

"Mhm," she mumbled. "You okay?"

"I'm good,"

"You sound upset,"

"Well, I had the blessin' of bumpin' into Travis befo' I came ova," I felt her tense up a lil when I mentioned his name.

"What happened?"

"He was trippin'. I asked him if he was good because he couldn't sleep, and he was all not like you'd care... Somethin' wrong wit dat nigga. He claim I did somethin' ta him and now he hates my ass. He said we wasn't brothas and dat he ain't neva liked me,"

"Really?"

"Yeah. He looked me straight in my eyes when he said it too,"

"That's so mean... I think something is wrong with him, like seriously,"

"What'd he do? I felt you tense up when I said his name,"

"Well, Travis let me in yesterday when I came over. We were talking about Erica and I wanted his opinion. She said she didn't like you or us together-"

"Fuck I do ta her?"

It felt like everybody didn't like or hated me fa no reason.

"Nothing, she's going through something," Esined spoked quietly. "No, I can't tell you," she added, already knownin' dat my nosey ass wanted ta know.

"Aiight. Back ta Travis,"

"Then he told me that he didn't like us together either. Said we were annoying and all we do is argue. Then he said you never apologize and I'm always first to come back. He said that I deserve better than you,"

"What'd you say back ta him?" I asked.

"I told him not to discredit you because I know that you're trying,"

"Okay. Anything else happen?"

"He ended the conversation saying that I had a good man next to me and I was blind. He told me to let him know when I was done playing games,"

"Wait," I laughed ta myself. "He thinks that he's the better guy fa you?" I sat up, laughin' loudly.

"Aug, hush. Stop before you wake everybody up," she pulled me be back ta her. She covered my mouth. "Are you done?"

I nodded and she moved her hand. I started snickerin' and she laughed a little.

"You are so petty,"

"I can't. He muh'fuckin' thought," I chuckled. "Thanks fa the joke, baybeh,"

"Stop it," she giggled. "You're so mean,"

"I'm just really gone at the fact dat he thinks he's betta. Like bruh, you got just as many problems as me. If not, he got mo',"

"It's not like I'd even see him in that way anyway,"

"Right," I chuckled, leanin' back.

It was quiet fa a moment and I glanced at her.

"Right?" I asked.

"August, don't you start that," she grumbled, restin' her head on my chest.

"But-"

She lifted her head just to side eye me.

"Aiight,"

"Ridiculous,"

I sucked my teeth and rested my hand on her lower back.

Her leg was ova mine and she was on her side. "I love you,"

"I know," I said quietly.

"You don't love me back now?"

"You know I luh you. Mo' than my words could eva explain,"

She found my hand and held it.

I smiled and kissed the back of her hand. "Wanna sing me ta sleep?"

"No,"

My smile dropped. "Pooh, please?"

"Fine," she sighed. She started off hummin', but then she started rappin' quietly.

It completely threw me off.

Sweet JonesMy bitch a choosy lover, never fuck without a rubberNever in the sheets, like it on top of the coverMoney on the dresser, drive a KompressorTop notch hoes get the most, not the lesserTrash like to fuck with $40 in the clubFuckin' up the game, bitch it gets no loveShe be cross country, givin' all that she gotA thousand a pop, I'm pullin' Bentleys off the lotI smashed up the gray one, bought me a redEvery time we hit the parkin' lot we turn headSome hoes wanna choose but them bitches too scaryYour bitch chose me, you ain't a pimp, you a fairy

"Esined," my jaw dropped. "I gotta marry you. Dats it. I have to,"

She started laughin'.

"You laughin' and I'm serious. A girl that can rap that song can have my heart,"

Esined giggled. "I thought I already had it,"

"Congratulations, you played yourself,"

"Get out my bed," she pushed my chest.

"I'm playin', baybeh," I pulled her closer. "You know you got my heart,"

"You have mine too,"

"Dats what I like ta hea',"

She yawned.

"Tired?"

She nodded. "Yeah. I have to work tomorrow,"

"What time?"

"Nine to six,"

"You want me ta come ova when you get off?"

"Maybe I'll come over to your place. Things have been weird around here lately," she said.

"Anything you wanna talk about?"

"Nah. Nothing much to say," she yawned again.

I decided ta switch how we were layin' and pulled her on top of me.

We met up for a kiss. "I love you," we said at the same time and we laughed a little.

She rested her head on my chest. "Night Snugga,"

"Goodnight, Pooh," I kissed her forehead and laid back.

-Hi.

How are y'all?

Y'all probably thinking, okay she has a bunch of sexual abuse & such things in this story.

It's because I want to spread the message that rape can happen to anyone. Men, women, children. Anyone.

Doesn't matter what you wear, how strong or weak you are, your gender. Doesn't matter.

If you haven't consented, it is rape.

Even if you gave consent, then changed your mind; it is STILL rape.

No means no. Not maybe, not possibly, etc. It means no. "No" can also be said in many different ways.

Rape is not okay & it never will be.

I don't mean to seem preachy, but I have strong views that I constantly express through my writing.

Some of you notice them.

That one comment had me crying lmao. "#ViewsFromShia"

But yeah, until next time.

Excuse typos please.

Comments & Votes are appreciated.

Much love, Shia. Xoxo