Chapter 1

Hi everyone! So this is the third in the trilogy. And I'm gonna call it the Life trilogy because each title has something about life. So yeah. Well. This was hard for me to write because it was sad and all. So I tried anyway. Soooo.... Here's chapter one!<><><><><><><><><><><><><>Chapter 1The man leaves a uniform, a letter, and a final goodbye with us, and he leaves like nothing's wrong. I turn to Ponyboy in shock. The room seems to be spinning as I throw my arms around him. He holds me tightly. "B- but Pony, you can't go. What about us? And me? A-and Baby?" I sob violently, grabbing a fistful of his shirt. "I have to," he says, his voice cracking. "What am I gonna do without you?" "I don't know, babe. I don't know." He starts sobbing as well. Other arms wrap around us, and I know everyone's getting in on it. I just can't imagine my life without him. What if he dies? What if he never comes home? What if? What if? What if?"How come it had to be you?" Soda asks, tears starting to fall down his cheeks. "Why you?""Soda, I'm gonna be okay," Ponyboy says. Darry shakes his head. His eyes glisten with tears."You listen to me. Be safe wherever you're going. We all need you to come home. Okay?""I will, Darry." Darry starts to break down as he pulls Ponyboy into a hug. "We can't lose you, little buddy," he whispers. Soda hugs him next. Then all the boys. Steve apologizes for always being so hostile to him. Two-Bit tries to cheer him up. Dallas tells him to be safe. Johnny bawls his eyes out. Johnny and Ponyboy have always been close. Now it's just like losing a best friend...He comes back to me with tear filled eyes. I shake my head as he takes me into a hug once more. I feel everyone's eyes on us. "P- please come home," I beg. "If anything else, just... Come home.""I swear I will. JT, I promise I'll come home. Whatever it takes, I'll come back for you..."We stay in each other's embrace until we both stop crying. He pulls away and studies my face before kissing me. "We should probably get to sleep," Darry says. "You'll need it, Pony..." He nods. "Goodnight y'all. I'll see you in the morning," Ponyboy says. Everyone says goodnight. He takes my hand and walks upstairs with his uniform in his hands. He sets it on the dresser and kisses me again. "This can't be happening..." I whisper. "It can't be...""I love you," he says quietly in my ear. I put my head against his chest as his arms gently hold my waist. We sway back and forth even though there's no music on. We're kinda dancing to our own song only we hear. "I want you to know that.""I do.""I love hearing you say that," he says with a laugh. I break a weak smile. "I'm gonna miss you...""I'm gonna miss you too.""I can't imagine this," I say, looking up at him. "Then don't." He leans down and kisses me softly again. He pulls away and kisses my forehead. I put my ear to his chest again and hear his heartbeat, and I know that in three months, I'll hear that sound again. "I love you..." he whispers again before gently putting his lips to my neck. I feel hot tears sliding down my cheeks as my eyes remain closed. My heart beats harder in my chest. I silently hope to myself this isn't the last time I'll ever hear that...•••I straighten the collar on Ponyboy's uniform. He looks so handsome in it, but I hate that he's even wearing it. We helped him pack his suitcase earlier this morning. We all got up bright and early for breakfast. We had to see him off at nine. I didn't get any sleep last night. My stomach was and still is churning at the most horrific sights I keep imagining in my head. I stayed up until my eyes closed. I had about three hours of sleep.This can't be happening. "Come home to me, okay?" I ask. "Come home to me, your brothers, your friends, and especially your daughter. I don't want her growing up asking where daddy is, okay?""Babe, I'm gonna be okay. I promise." I fold my arms across my chest and look away from him. It breaks my heart to see him ready to leave us. "Come here," he says softly, pulling me into a hug. I wrap my arms around him, and we stand there. "I love you more than you'll ever know. I'm so sorry if I never gave you all my time. You deserve it though. And I'm sorry for ever hurting you.""You haven't.""Well still. I want you to hug and kiss Baby every night for me. And if something happens to me... Tell her everything about me and us, and tell her how much we loved each other.""Keep safe and be careful so you can come home and tell her yourself." He smiles. "I will, JT. Now we better get going as much as we don't want to."We go downstairs, and Steve's actually holding Baby at the moment. He passes her over to Ponyboy. He kisses her cheek. "Goodbye, chubby face," he says with a quiet chuckle. "Give daddy kisses," I tell her. She puts her mouth on his cheek. "Dada," she says. "Yeah. Daddy's gotta go bye-bye.""B- bye.""I'm gonna miss you, Babydoll. I love you so much..." A single tears rolls down his cheek. Watching them makes me want to cry all over again. She takes her little hand and curiously wipes away the tear. He smiles. "Dada," she says again. "Bye, Baby. Don't grow up too fast on me," he says. He sets her down, and she crawls around. Two-Bit picks her up and sits on the couch. Everyone who's staying at the house says their final goodbyes to Ponyboy. He waves, and Darry, Soda, Ponyboy, and me get in the truck and start driving to where we're supposed to. I sit on Pony's lap since there's not much room. He holds my hand tightly the entire ride. As we pull up, so many other men dressed in the same uniforms are hugging and kissing their wives and families goodbye. I feel just as miserable as the rest. Someone comes by and takes his bags away and onto the train. We walk until we're about the same proximity of everyone else. I immediately turn to him. He hugs me close again, but this time, it's shorter. Soda hugs him next. Then Darry. "Don't forget to write us, Pony," Soda reminds him. "I won't.""Remember us, okay?" Darry says. Pony laughs a little. "Are you kidding me? Y'all are the whole reason I'm gonna make it home alright," he says. Darry gives him a weak smile. "Take care of JT for me," he adds. "And help her with Baby.""Don't worry. We will. Nothing's gonna happen," Soda reassures him. "Thanks." He looks down at his shoes and back up. He looks at me with sad eyes before giving me a long kiss. The train whistle sounds, and my heart breaks a little more. He tucks my hair behind my ear. "It's just for a little while, babe. I'll be back before you know it," he says quietly. "Hurry up." He laughs and kisses my forehead without looking at me. "Goodbye. I love you.""I love you too..." He starts walking away. I start to take a step forward out of habit. Soda grabs my arm. They board the train. Wives and families all around begin waving at the hands sticking out the window. Ponyboy sticks his head out a widow and waves. I smile and wave back. Soda and Darry do the same. "God be with him..." Darry mumbles. The train starts pulling out. Everyone starts to leave to go home. Darry, Soda, and me are the last to leave. I watch the train go farther down the tracks, taking Ponyboy to wherever they're all going. We finally sit in the truck in silence on the ride home. We get home, and nobody says anything. We all sit around, not even worried if we've had breakfast or anything. By the look on everyone's face, Ponyboy is all they can think about. I feel so empty now. I know he's okay for now. But... He's not here beside me, laughing with me, holding me, playing with Baby. Baby... What if he never sees her again? I can't have her asking where daddy is. I can't answer that for her. I stare at her innocent face and think about what he told me just last night. Last night feels like it happened so long ago. But he told me that gold reminds him of her because of her innocence and beauty. I really hope she stays that way. I smile to myself in remembrance of that one poem Ponyboy and I both knew. "Nothing Gold Can Stay." Wow. It's been so long... And now here we are. Tucker seems to sense that everyone's upset. He climbs on Dally and holds on around his neck, hugging him in a way he knows. Dallas smiles at him. "Hey, buddy," he says. "Thanks. Go hug your Aunt JT." Dally points to me. Tucker smiles and toddles over to me, falling on me. I hug the dark haired little boy. "Thank you, Tucker," I say, tickling his sides. He has no comprehension of what we're saying at all. But I can tell he does a little by the look on his face. He then goes around and hugs everybody else. "Duh-duh!" Baby screams. Tucker clumsily walks to her and puts his tiny arms around her. He giggles. "Tucker!" Johnny says. He sticks his tongue out at him, and Tucker mimics him. Johnny's so good with these kids. It's amazing. Everyone is for that fact. "Wow. I think these kids make us forget things easier," he says. "Yeah. They'll make you forget a lot more if you ain't careful," Dallas says. I nod. "But they make you remember a lot..." I add. I stare at Baby's bright green eyes. Pony's eyes... At least I still have half of him here with me. She doesn't have a clue. I'm so glad she's too young right now. Otherwise, it'd be a hassle. "Dada!" Baby says. She looks around when no one picks her up. "Dada!" She starts crying and puckers out her bottom lip. "Mamama," she cries. I pick her up and try to calm her down. "Shh, Baby. Shh..." Everyone stares sympathetically at me. I close my eyes. "Please, Pony," I think to myself. "I can't do this by myself for very long."