Aftermath

"Baby calm down I'm sure they're fine." I said holding chris' face in my hands; getting to the hospital was taking hella long and I could tell he was frustrated, anxious and above all scared - I was too; in fact probably more than he was.

"Stop saying that; how the hell can you be so calm Kam?! This is my brother and one of my best friends shot! In my house. That means whoever it is, was after me Kam; me." He shouted, looking as if he was fighting back tears.

"Chris this is probably some obsessed person tryna fuck with you, don't feed into this bullshit; they're going to be fine okay." I said looking into his glassy eyes and although I knew everything I said was going in one ear and out the other he still nodded and held my hand tighter.

Chris dragged me behind him as he jogged through the hospital looking for mijo's room, his was the closest so we decided to do it that way first.

"Oh my God mijo." I half cried letting go of Chris' hand and crouching over his bed to hug him - he was okay.

"I'm so happy you're okay; don't ever scare us like that!" I told him wiping the tears that were falling from the side of my face. He laughed huskily, it looked like it hurt him just to do that.

"Stop all that bitch ass crying Kaye." He said making me chuckle before his face turned to Chris who was quiet as a mouse in the corner away from us.

"Nigga why you all the way over there; I mean I just got shot I can't get a hug or nothin?" Mijo joked, but Chris didn't laugh he just walked over slowly.

"Yo-"

"Aye Chris somethings wrong with keeis. Come on hurry!" Red ran in making all of our heads snap in the direction of the door where he was stood half crying. In a flash Chris had forgotten what he was going to say and ran out with me on his tail following behind red; when we got to the room a doctor was on his way out.

"Doc what happened?! Is he okay? Please tell me he's okay." Chris cried out breathlessly but we all knew straight from the doctors face what he going to say; what it meant.

"We did everything we could-" everything after that wasn't important. The only thing after that was tears, loud sobs, grown men - crying like kids. I dropped down next to Chris who was now on the ground in hysterics.

"shh its okay. Its going to be okay" I said with his head in my chest rocking him back and fourth as his tears cascaded down my torso and mine onto his head.

I didn't know how to feel; I spent most of if not all the time I was around keeis taking cheap shots and going back and fourth with him, but at the end of the day he was my friend and I cared about him; I was responsible for his death. I was the reason for all of this.

—

"Chris you have to eat something." I said with sadness seeping through my voice. He hadn't done anything the last few days; he literally only got up to use the bathroom, take a shower and occasionally ate whenever I force fed him. Its like our lives had been turned upside and everything was crashing down.

"I don't want to eat. I don't want to talk. Stop asking." He told me with his hood over his eyes so I could hardly see his face.

"I'm trying to be here for you Chris!" My voice raised slightly and I heard him suck his teeth and stand up chucking the pillow he had on him towards me aimlessly as he walked out.

"Don't fucking throw shit at me!" I shouted chucking the same hard pillow at the back of his head and getting him square; his feet stopped in the process of him walking; he turned around to glare at me and sure enough I was sending him the same death glare.

I know I shouldn't be angry; I should be understanding of his feelings right now - but this was his fault. I told him not to fuck with me, not to be so persistent in trying to get me back - I had baggage, and a lot of it.... I warned him.

"Kamaiyah...don't fucking. Throw shit at me." He growled coming closer and closer to me, snatching my arm in the process.

"Get off me! Don't fucking touch me - you keep trying to take your emotions out on me but that's not going to bring him back Chris! Shutting me and everybody else out is not going to bring keeis back..." I trailed off when I realised both of us had tears fitting to fall, he blinked them away before they could - still with a tight grip on me.

"Get the fuck out of my face Kam." He muttered pushing me away finally turning to walk towards the suites master bedroom.

I was actually waiting on sevyn to get here before Chris decided to lash out. We were staying at a private hotel because they were still doing investigations at Chris' house.

Sev seemed sad when we spoke earlier and since everything happened I hadn't seen neesha so I thought we could talk maybe take our mind off things by meeting up.

"Hey boo." I said as I let her into the suite and she let out a short "hey" making me frown and drop down onto the couch next to her.

"Where's Chris?" She asked resting her head on her hand and I rolled my eyes.

"Somewhere drowning in his sorrows." I replied making her sit up.

"I mean this has to be so hard on him, especially with everything happening with chantel and the baby." She said and I nodded.

"I understand that; I really do but its so hard to try and be there for him when he keeps taking shit out on me." She nodded in understanding and sighed.

"I just can't believe keeis is gone though..." She said and I swear I heard her voice crack.

"You taking this really hard girl. What's up?." I asked and she blinked slowly.

"if I tell you something you got to promise not to tell nobody, especially not Chris." She whispered sitting forward towards me and I nodded.

"I was seeing keeis....not recently but I did used to mess with him." My eyes opened up on impulse from her words and I had to close my mouth before something flew in it.

"Whaaat? You used to fuck keeis?" I whispered lower than her and she nodded sadly looking down into her lap.

"Why ya'll never acted like it? And what happened with you both?" I asked and she huffed loudly.

"Well one because Chris told me from jump that I was off limits to any of his boys; but I really liked him so I risked it. He was messing with this other girl and I found out - fucked up thing is she was caelyn's friend and at the time me and cae were cool as hell - she knew what was up with me and keeis-" I cut her off when it all made sense.

"Ohhhh so that's why you was beefing her all that time?" I said and she nodded.

"Wow...I'm sorry sev" I said poking my mouth out and opened my arms to hug her when I saw tears fall from her eyes; oh so I really feel like shit now.

-"I'm sorry for coming at you like that earlier." Chris said sending a vibration through my ears as I rest my head on his chest.

"Its okay....I forgive you." I said softly and heard him chuckle - it was the first time he'd done anything of the sort in 4 days since the shooting.

"I'm not trying to fight with you or take anything out on you, but this is really hard for me; and I don't know when I'm going to stop feeling the way I do." He said then looked down at me "I sound so soft." He joked but I didn't laugh.

"No you don't." I said shortly then leaned up to kiss his jaw.

"You know what I need to do?" He asked and my brows furrowed.

"Tell my mother about this baby." He said and sighed.

"You really think now is the time?" I asked with my mood suddenly changing - I didn't want to talk about any baby that wasn't mine; I didn't care.

"I mean yeah, if not now then when? The same day TMZ find out?" He asked back and I shrugged.

"Iono you do what you want." I resulted and heard him suck his teeth. "Why you acting like that?" He asked and I could feel the argument coming.

"Acting like what?" I asked with the same tone I used before and he raised up and stood off the bed.

"You need to stop pretending and get rid of that attitude." I rolled my eyes and rolled over onto my side.

"Excuse the fuck out of me if I don't want to talk about my boyfriend's baby that he's having with another girl Chris" I said but he didn't say another word to me and that's the note we went to sleep on.